Monday, September 30, 2013

Broncos You Scary

Don't want to play them.

Enjoying the Giants play so far.

3-1 in $$$ league. Down 6 in $ league have jimmy graham to go, opponent has nobody left.

dat ass

Friday, September 27, 2013

El Picks

Baltimore -3 over BUFFALO
I don't think Baltimore is "right" on defense yet and certaintly the offense misses Boldin but I'm pretty sure they are three points better than Buffalo. Who needed a miracle to win the week before then got beat by a bad/flashes of mediocre Jet team.

Bengals -4 over BROWNS
Screw you Browns. I ain't buying that road win.

Chicago +3 over DETROIT
I think the Bears keep the good times rolling.

Steelers -2 over MINNESOTA
It's obvious the Vikings suck just like it's obvious the Giants suck. Good thing there are only 16 games to suffer through and not 182 like beisbol.

Arizona +2.5 over BUCS
Mike Glennon?

Indy -8 over JAX
Jax is pretty bad, winless Lions bad? Maybe.

Seattle -2.5 over HOUSTON
Texans have not looked very good thus far. Also Russell Wilson hasn't really shown the 2012 Russell Wilson, scary to say this team could probably be a little better once he rounds into form.

TITANS -3.5 vs nyj
Rookie QB on the road vs. Gregg Williams head decapitating defense.

Philly +10.5 over DENVER
If Chip and Vick are on point this Sunday are we looking at a combined 90 point game here?

Skins -3 over OAKLAND
The RGIII's get on the board.

Dallas -2 over SD
Boys got something going here. Can't wait until November.

FALCONS -2 over Pats
Last time Pats were underdogs on primetime television? 2002. Wes Welker says hi Mr. Belidick.

SAINTS -6.5 over Miami
Fins are much improved but tough tough tough beating this team at home on a Monday night. If this were in Miami I'd take those points (they wouldnt be there though, maybe 2 or 3).

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

new week

I have a lot to talk about, but not much to say

I love this country, but my god, if a guy can stand up and read dr seuss for 10 hours to delay a vote, there is something fucked up about that.  Love it or Leave it, and just like McDonald's, I'm loving it.

I like that Kaepernick needs twitter to motivate him.  How about wanting to win a superbowl, or get a big fat pay raise.  You know, things that matter, not what some tweeter your play on sunday, right after they mention that all they have left is dry cat food.

Josh Freeman is going to the bench, this should end well for all parties involved. 

Headed back up to the U this weekend.  Haven't been back to Northern Idaho in like 10 years, should be a fun guys trip for homecoming.

Basement remodel is finally finished.  Took a week longer than it was supposed to.  Now I need to determine the first keg to buy to pop the cherry.  Suggestions?

I'll do a cribs post someday, but not today

I've scored the most points in my money league and i'm 1-2.  fucking hate fantasy football.

Allie LaForce is a hot sideline reporter.  She was like miss teen usa though, so she doesn't have any good pictures out there, and anything of her in a swimsuit is from when she was a teenager, which might be kind of creepy.

learn about bourbon

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Just the tip




Allstate

That safe driving bonus sounds awesome.  I saw the commercial where it says twice a year you get a safe driving bonus.  Then I saw the check.  FIVE FUCKING DOLLARS????  You actually put that in the goddman commercial?  A FIVE FUCKING DOLLAR check is your safe driving reward??   Seriously, watch the commercial, the check is for FIVE FUCKING DOLLARS.  You spent millions of dollars on a commercial that tries to sell me insurance based on the idea that if I don't wreck you'll give me $10 every year??  Really?  Fuck you Allstate.  I don't care if you have President Cerrano as your spokesman your $5 check is not going to sway me.  Geico will save me 15%; my insurance is more than $66 a year so that 15% is looking a lot better.  Get me that fucking lizard.  TWSS


NCAA - Random

Just pay the kids already.  Fuck it, take away all the scholarships and make the kids pay their own tuition.  Give teams salary caps to keep the field "even."   Star player gets paid $150K but he has to pay his own tuition and room and board.  Shitty players get enough to pay tuition and room and board.  Don't like what tOSU will pay you, go to Akron, maybe they'll pay you more.  Tuition might be cheaper too.  This would actually help the school in academic money.  They'd get another 50 or so kids paying full tuition which is much more than it actually costs to educate a student.  Full tuition is what the super rich pay to subsidize the poor kids who get financial aid.


NFL

The NFL or I guess the people who broadcast the games need to add a "would have been good from" stat on all field goals.  The technology exists, it is pretty much the same shit they do to measure how far a HR would have gone in baseball.  Just use that and make sure it stays between the uprights and let me know.  It'd be cool to see some dude crush a 55 yarder and have it say "would have been good from 69"  or someone squeeze a 43 yarder in and have it say "would have been good from 44."



NCAA  - Tem's top 5

1 - Oregon
2 - Clemson
3 - Alabama
4 - tOSU
5 - Georgia


WVU

Told you they sucked


Pirates

OK they might make the playoffs


tOSU

There is not QB controversy.  Stop it media.  Guiton looked good enough for someone to spend a 7th round pick on him though.  It was pretty much the best possible thing for him.  He got to carve up some terrible defenses and now he will be "possibly the next Tom Brady" in the upcoming draft.  He'll be a 6th or 7th round pick and could turn into something special.  He won't, but that's what the talking heads will be saying.




> EA

Lauren Gardner

 Blue and Keith might know this chick.  She was an ex Denver Bronco cheerleader and does sports stuff out west.  I can't remember who hates redheads, but too bad, this one is hot.  Don't care if it is real or not.  Well the color, I bet the hair is real and not a wig.  She's on twitter.  I might join.


Monday, September 23, 2013

Monday

Skins 0-3, lions finally won @WAS. RGIII had an idiotic pick, and he still doesn't know how to slide creating another stupid turnover:

Giants look just as awful?

At least it's only the Cowboys in first, hopefully they end the season like this GIF as they usually do:

Got Welker+2 vs. Knowshon in $$$ league, terrified, hopefully knowshon has to stay in to block since Clady is out, fucking bears D caught my opponent up. Won my $ league matchup, 3-0, should I feel bad about being the most experienced player in this 8 team work league? It's fun to be in that league while also being in the competitive 10 teamer, having Jimmy Graham without having to sacrifice at any other position has been the key, winning the $ league will mitigate my loss in the $$$ league (jinx and xnij).

dem tits

dat ass

From Lordz Of Wagers - I don't comment enough anymore for this old bet to stay valid, but just wanted to point out I won this:
2014 World Cup
USA qualifies for world cup 2014 = 1 week name/pic for keef
USA does not qualify = 1 week name/pic for spiff

Friday, September 20, 2013

el picks

I can't look at any woman without thinking about fucking.

El picks later. Come back y'all.

Green Bay -2.5 over BENGALS
Flip flopped on this a few times. But I don't think Dalton can keep up with the one they call Rodgers.

St. Louis +4 over DALLAS
Romo is hurt. Getting injections in his ribs. And Demarco Murray sucks. Serious. They'll hit Romo, that's what they do and he will utrneth the balleth overth.

TITANS -3 over San Diego
While everyone was jumping on the Vikings defense on the waivers I deftly and calmly picked up the Titans defense because I'm a winner. I win.

VIKES -6 over Browns
I mean cmon. This is too easy. Chudzinski is nuts. If he knew Richardson was not his style of running back why not address it in the off-season?

Tampa +7 over PATS
O:FB giveth (sox in playoffs after 69 win season) and taketh (Pats def ain't winning shit this year).

Arizona +7.5 over SAINTS
Like the points here. Arians coached team will HANG around.

Lions +1.5 over SKINS
RGIII might run more - said the headline. Here is monday's headline. RGII is dead.

Houston -2.5 over BALT
Texans have had to come back two weeks in a row to snatch victory but the Ravens have looked worse in the first two games so far. Still not clicking on defense the Browns had opportunities in that game but are the Browns. Schaub is off to a nice start. And Denadre could be that budding star opposite Andre that they sorely need.

Atlanta +2 over MIAMI
74% of the money is on the fins. You know what that means.

Buffalo +2 over JETS
EJ Manuel >>>>>>>> Geno Smith

Indy +10.5 over SAN FRAN
Richardson in the mix, this is too many points.

Jax +19 over SEATTLE
I can't in good concious spot a team 19 points under any circumstance.

BURGH +2 over Bears
Steeler nation rises for this one.

DENVER -15 over Oakland
But I could spot 15 points, especially if Peyton Manning is involved.


Thursday, September 19, 2013

reboot

Browns reboot again...poor wHeeden*. Doesn't this guarantee that whatever QB they take with their first pick will suck?

In my 3 $$$ leagues the team that I felt the best about after the draft is 0-2, the team I felt the worst about is 1-1, and the team I wasn't sure about is 2-0.

I think Minnesota will be a popular suicide pick this week.

I get to put a crib together tonight. LOV Cribs has a whole new meaning nowadays.

Yesterday was the 66th birthday of the US Air Force.

Mize, how is your dad's fantasy team doing?

That moment where you start to type a sentence that starts with "That moment...". (Don't do that.)

I would have had this up sooner, but I got called into a meeting.

GO!

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Ghostbusters 2

Baby is sick so I am staying at home.  I guess that is OK.  No, she doesn't have the chicken pox, well maybe not, she just has a slight fever.  Apparently you aren't supposed to take her to day care if she has a fever.  Whatever.  I get watch TV.  Ghostbusters 2 is on.


FF

I hope Meiz got his 21.  I'm still salty about my kicker getting -1 and me losing by 1.  Effing kicker.  I think my teams might be OK.  Maybe.


WVU

They started some freshman guy named Ford.  I don't know much about him because the game wasn't on at my house.  They won against some powerhouse from Georgia.


tOSU

Braxton Miller's knee is fine now that Guiton looks good.   Hyde will want to do well too because Hall is looking good at RB.  The Defense doesn't look so good.


> EA

We'll go with another easy one this week.  Samantha Ponder.  Yes please.  She married some QB from Minn though, so that kind of stinks I guess.  Not really though, I wasn't getting any off of her anyway.  Why > EA?  No huge nose.  Apparently unlike EA Samantha does not have Toucan Sam in her family tree.  But no bikini pic for her.  Spiff probably has one though.




Monday, September 16, 2013

NFC Least

Seahawks with homefield in playoffs would be tough. Easy survivor pick next week, them at home vs jags. Texans saved me yesterday.

Skins are 2nd worst team in league right now, offense sucks then defense gives up a whole game in pts/yds in the 1st halves, then RGIIIandOUT pads his stats against prevent. Rinse and repeat. 0-4 NFC Least yesterday so only 1 game back still.

Elisha ♥ throwing picks

Have 2 jags on my $$$ team, not wise, lost, 1-1. Won my $ matchup though, 2-0

Friday, September 13, 2013

El Picks

Last night talk:

Letting Welker go was a ya-huge mistake. Clearly.  In your face genius.
God Rex Ryan is such a clown.
God damn rain.
A lot of terrible commercials.
Mayock slurping veterans and annihilating rookies.
Geno Smith awfulness, he holds the ball so long at times, take off son you're a running QB...

Unrelated I am fucking pumped for this Mayweather / Canelo fight.  I might even order it.  Undercard is even dope. 

St. Louis +6.5 over ATLANTA
Gimme those points jack. I'm telling you the Rams are going to be nice this year.

Carolina -2.5 over BUFFALO
Can you be my Superman my Superman my Superman.

BEARS -6 over Vikes
Ponder on the road. Like whoa.

GREEN BAY -7.5 over Skins
Pack all day, home opener and they looked really good last week like I thought they would.  Made some mistakes in SF that cost them the game and McCarthy still seems hell bent on making the most terrible in game coaching decisions in the league.  But Rodgers man.  Rodgers.

LUCK -2.5 over Fins
Luck is pretty fucking good.

CHEIFS -3 over Cowboys
Tough road game here for the boys and they needed a David Wilson nightmare of a game to win and still yielded a bunch of points for a defense that was supposed to be tighter.  Maybe by November, totally new scheme.

PHILLY -7.5 over Chargers
Chargers defense is in for it here boy.  Still don't get the gushing over the Chip Kelly offense.  Peyton and Brady been running 75-80 plays a game for a minute.  Maybe not 53 by halftime but still the odd formations the Eagles used once in awhile was to me more "innovative" then running a in sync no huddle.  With some read option worked in.  Either way this has just a few weeks left.  I say Week 4 Foles starts.  Vick will get injured on the short week vs. Chiefs.

Titans +9 over TEXANS
A lot of points.  That Gregg Williams can coach defense.

Detroit +1 over ARIZONA
Hope they win 11 games so Meiz shuts the fuck up about how bad they suck.

New Orleans -3.5 over BUCS
Looking like my fears about Freeman, so far, are on point.

RAIDERS -5.5 over Jax
What does it say about the Jaguars that I'm willing to lay a TD with the Raiders.

SEATTLE -3 over San Fran
Hawks home.

BENGALS -7 over Steelers
The road to the Super Bowl starts now!



Thursday, September 12, 2013

What day is it?

The NFL should just create their own minor league system.

I need to make my suicide picks today. I'm leaning towards Oakland for one of them.

That's all I have...TPS.

GO!

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Never Forget

I know we joke, and make fun a lot, but in all seriousness, 12 years ago today is a day I will never forget.  I'll remember for the rest of my life hearing some weird news report on my alarm/clock radio right after the first plane hit the tower.  I'll remember thinking it was like a war of the worlds joke.  I'll remember rolling out of my loft (because that's how I rolled) and turning on the TV and laying down on the couch about 10 minutes before the first tower fell.  I'll remember the patriotism and the outpouring of American pride over the following days and weeks.  And I don't live in NY, so I can only imagine what feelings and emotions others go through every year on this day.

Ok back to fun.  Syria, huh.  Chickened out there didn't we Barack..pussy.

Jay-Z's holy grail song is crap.  The JT intro is awesome, and a great 2 minute intro, and then when Jay-Z comes on the song is ruined.  That's usually when I flip away from it.  Local station here has gone as far as remixing it so that the song ends when JT's part ends, but you hear Jay going "UH" "UH" all through the intro.

"what's a holy grail song?"  /tem

Manning bowl 2013.  Peyton is going to get acquainted with where he plans on playing his last game of the season.

Frank Caliendo is gold.  If you haven't seen him do Adam Schefter, it's pretty good.

And by "do" I mean impersonate, not actually have man love, because nobody needs to see that.

Meetings all day with potential banking partners.  Best day of the year (s).

Pirates are 8 games up with 18 to play to at least get a Wild Card.  Would take a Messian type collapse to miss out.  Granted it's only a 1 game playoff with the Reds, but it's something.

Who knew that Cleveland is only 2 games behind in the loss column from a WC spot?

"everybody knew that"  /mize

Enjoy the day friends.  Return to your homes, hold your families close, and wait. Tomorrow you claim what is rightfully yours.






Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Tuesday shmoozeday

tOSU

One more pretty easy game left and then like 9 more easy ones after that.

Their QB might be hurt, but I like their backup.  The backup can beat CAL.  Not sure the backup would beat Mich though.  Maybe.  He is pretty solid.





WaVA

Either the OK offense is shitty or the WaVa defense just played their career game.  I don't expect the defense to hold many people under 20.  I do expect the offense to keep scoring under 10.  This is a total garbage year.  Next year drunk and baldy will be on the hot seat.  The year after that he will be coaching somewhere else and WaVa will have a new coach.



Tampa Bay
They suck too apparently.  I was afraid they would be inept on offense.


NFL Power Rankings

1 - Niners
2 - Broncos
3 - Packers
4 - Lions

5 -Chiefs


Lots of teams were pretty rusty.  I think the Niners and Broncos showed some good stuff.  Packers looked good in a loss.  The rest of the league did not show me anything to warrant a top 5 pick but I had to pick someone so I went with the Lions and Chiefs. 




Pirates

I don't believe.  Their September so far:


L W W L L L L W    3-5.  I don't know if playing sub .500 keeps them in the playoff picture.


In any case the pitchers are mostly broke down and the closer is still hurt.  The trade for offense has yielded like two more runs per game, which brings them to averaging about 3 runs a game....

tem college football rankings

1 - Bama
2 - Clemson
3 - tOSU
4 - Oregon
5 - Georgia






I work the sideline and I am hotter than EA

These are in no particular order.  First up Jenn Brown.  I think she was the first one to shatter the EA ceiling.  Everyone thought EA was the shit, then this came along down the sideline. 


Monday, September 09, 2013

Footyball Was Awesome

Started with this:

Ended with this:

and everything in between. That Reggie 77 yarder was beautiful.

Gonna enjoy it before RGIII blows his knee out and/or Chip Kelly trolls the Skins tonight.

P.S. THANK YOU DAVID WILSON, helped me big in my 100$ league, just gotta hold off a huge Garcon game. Also, unrelated, likely gonna win in my work 20$ league matchup even though I am up against pey pey. Everyone give their fantasy status, go

Friday, September 06, 2013

Blue's NFL preview with rebuttals and gems

NFC EAST - (9-7 Wins this division again, wouldn't say it's overrated, would just say it's evenly matched.)

1. Redskins - RGIII and Alfred Morris in an overrated division.
(RGIII will never play 16 games in the NFL, drafting Cousins was the smartest thing Mike Shanahan has ever done)

2. Cowboys - Tony Romo has weapons and a sense of urgency this year
(I am legitmately terrified of the Cowboys winning 10 games and winning a playoff game. Fucking Monte Kiffin and Rod Marinelli? God damn it man.)

3. Giants - not a bad season, probably 8-8, but their defense is awful and no running game
(Their offense is going to be incredible. The defense is mediocre. Awful is a strong word.)

4. Eagles - Chip Kelly will kill Michael Vick by week 4, and then it's the Nick Foles show
(Agree and Chip has Bobby Petrino face to me. He's a college coach. Go away.)

NFC NORTH
1. Packers - Rodgers will be discount double checking his way to 11-5
(13-3, The Pack is back.)

2. Lions (WC) - Yes, I picked the lions here, assuming Suh doesn't kill a man
(Still worried about the AWFUL pass defense they gave up like the most big play passes last year)

3. Bears - Is this the season Jay Cutler becomes a star...doubtful
(Brandon Marshall doing Brandon Marshall things doesn't bode well for Cutty.)

4. Vikings - I love purple jesus, but he won't have more than 1,500 yards this season
(Ponder is awful. Greg Jennings is a kook. Percy was a first down machine, he gone.)

NFC SOUTH

1. Saints - Revenge tour for Sean Payton
(Super Bowl champs right here. I don't really hear national media talking about the Saints, it's all Niners/Seahawks talk. One thing that bothers me is that bafoon of a def coordinator. Him and his brother need to die.)

2. Bucs (WC) - Year 2 of Greg Schiano and Doug Martin, Gholston and Revis help the worst pass defense in the NFL last year.
(I really like the off-season the Bucs had. All depends on the play of Freeman though. I can see 10 wins and I can see 6 wins. One of those type of teams.)

3. Panthers - Cam Newton has a better season, but he's not even in the top 5 of the mobile/athletic QBs anymore
(Are you popping Molly? Cam Newton is better than those other QB's. #1 in your hearts and #1 in your program playa. This is the OG. And he will last longer than the others because he's built like a fucking linebacker. RGIII couldn't hold Cam Newtons jock if he duct taped it to his bony ass fingers.)

4. Falcons - disappointing season for a team that is loaded on offense
(Tread lightly, I said that last year they won 13 games ; most by 3 points they were very lucky in some games, I got 9 wins for them. Stephen Jackson has some miles left.)

NFC WEST
1. Seahawks - Best young QB in the NFC, Lynch will be in beast mode, and they don't lose at home.
(No arguments here. Wilson is special. And the teachings of Carroll are weird but effective, almost Phil Jackson like - minus the championships, you get the point I think)

2. 49ers - Kaepernick was a great story last year. So was Michael Vick his first year in the league, lets see Colin do it again, this time without any WR. Will have trouble scoring points.
( I think the Rams are better actually. I think the Niners are 4 wins less this year.)

3. Arizona - Bruce Arians can coach QBs, and i'm betting he gets one more good season out of Carson Palmer.
(He can coach QB's but the offensive line is horrendous and the RB situation is not good. Can Patrick Peterson play RB?)

4. Rams - Tough division. At what point do they give up on Bradtard? Tavon Austin will be fun to watch. You know you're in trouble when you WR corps has 2 rookies from WaVa and 2 second year guys from Wake Forest and Appalachian State. And you have a fragile QB, backed up by Kellen Clemens.
( I really like them though. I think Fisher is a top 3 coach in this league. The offensive line might be the best in the league (NS) and the dfense keeps them in games. Bradford might breakout this year. Stop laughing.)

Wild Cards come out of the easier divisions. NFC is loaded this year.

NFC Playoffs
Saints over Lions (Saints have a bye, I got Cowboys over Lions)
Bucs over Skins (Just dont trust Freeman, have them out and Atlanta & Rams WC instead of your Lions/Bucs) Got the Falcons beating the Rams in this round)

Seahawks over Bucs (Hawks over Falcons, revenge, 12th man, yada yada yada
Saints over Cowboys

Saints over Seahawks


AFC EAST
1. Patriots - by default, this division is just awful year in and year out, good for 11 wins easy every year.
(Amazing how awful this division is every year. Not even fair).

2. Dolphins - Tannehill takes a step forward. Defense is a little better. Just on the outside of the playoff picture, probably 9-7
(I got nothing on this team. I think the GM is terrible. Whatever 6-8 wins I estimate.)

3. Bills - Rookie head coach, rookie QB, no running game, no defense. Maybe win 4 games, maybe.
(no running game? CJ spiller is incredible. and I think Mario Williams has an impact year so I'll pencil them in for a few more wins than you have them at.)

4. JETS - should have picked up Tebow as opposed to Dr. Quinn, would have at least been entertaining.
(rock bottom, rex fired even though Woody still has a woody for him ; unrelated Joe Namath was incredible on Inside the NFL wed night.)

AFC NORTH
1. Bengals - Marvin Lewis has slowly built a very good defense, and has started to surround Ginger with some really good weapons. AJ Green is the truth.
(This is a good deep team with quality young guys and very physical. Congrats keef.)

2. Steelers (WC) - They were in re-loading/rebuilding mode last year. They always seem to find guys to replace guys. Really need Polomalu to stay healthy for 16 games.
(pipe dream Polamalu will never again play a full slate of games, too wreckless. I don't like Big Bens musk this year and why havent they been able to fix the leaky o-line, this is like 4 years now that line has been shitty.)

3. Browns - Because I hate the Ravens
(I mean God hates Cleveland. what more can we say here?)

4. Ravens - I hope Joe Flacco's arm falls off
(just too much against them, retirments, defections, super bowl hangover thing going on...)

AFC SOUTH
1. Texans - Will have another solid season, followed by disappointment in the playoffs again. Matt Schaub is Tony Romo of the AFC.
(Wonder when they will draft another offensive weapon. Is DeAndre Hopkins that person?)

2. Titans - Division is really weak
(They will run the ball 40 times a game, which isn't a bad thing, might be boringest team in NFL this year glad they don't have any national games aside from the Thursday night schedule which is shit.)

3. Colts - Take a step back. They'll miss Bruce Arians, and don't have the Pagano love story. Luck will be better, but he doesn't have the weapons around him for another run.
(Luck is incredible, they will always win more than they lose because of him)

4. Jaguars - Who is the best QB in college football this year? Could Bridgewater be running this offense next year?
(What's wrong with Gabbert, lol.)

AFC WEST
1. Broncos - Even with all the turmoil, should be able to fall out of bed and win 11 games in a weak AFC.
(Hearing the offense will be better than ever, probably average 28 a game or so. Defense wont be as dominate but it won't matter they coast to a AFC championship game.)

2. Chiefs (WC) - Ravens are probably true WC team, but I hate them. Old Andy Reid could prove he has one more good run in him. Alex Smith with something to prove. This was a team that had 4 pro-bowl players last year and won 3 games. Awful coached team last year.
( Cheifs as a WC pick is not crazy, they have crazy talent like you mention and Reid can coach, his in game decisions are famously awful but he can coach and he knows how to utilize the skill players.)

3. Chargers - Phyllis Rivers can't stand in the pocket anymore, you get any little bit of pressure on him and he wilts like a flower in Keith's back yard. Oh, and his offensive line is awful.
(I think you pretty much nailed it. And I've heard soundbites from this new coach, good lord. He is WAAYYY over his head.)

4. Raiders - Matt Flynn is going to ride those 2 games with the Packers forever, does he ever start another game? Raiders defense is horrible. Their offense would be OK if DMC could stay healthy (AHIIK), and Terelle Pryor will ad lib a lot. He's the black Tebow, can't throw the ball for shit, but he'll run around like a crazy person.
(Pryor is trash, Raiders need to hire a coach that can actually you know coach instead of looking for the next boy wizard)


AFC Playoffs:
Texans over Chiefs (agree)
Steelers over Bengals (Bengals have a bye, I got Colts in instead of Steelers. So Colts will lose to Pats)

Broncos over Texans (yes)
Steelers over Pats ( I got Bengals over Pats)

Broncos over Steelers. (I got Bengals over Broncos, condolences Keef)

SUPERBOWL
Broncos over Saints ( I got Saints over Bengals, your welcome keef)



Now unto some picks:

SAINTS -3 over Falcons : In the superdome I don't even think it's close.

Tampa -3 over JETS : Geno Smith is hilarity.

Bengals +4 over BEARS : Vegas is not in the know about the Bengals yet and while an away game in Chicago is not always a cup of tea the weather is perfect for AJ Green and the unleashing of Giovanni Bernard

kc -4 over JAX : seriously just sign Tebow already, and build the biggest baddest defense to support him and you'll win games and sell an fuck load of merchandise

DETROIT -5.5 over Vikes : Ponder has a road/home split that indicates he sucks on the road. Gambling isn't that hard y'all.

Green Bay +4.5 over SF : Last time the Packers will be getting points this year. Jump on it.

enjoy the NFL season.

Thursday, September 05, 2013

FOOTBALL!!!

FOOTBALL!!! That was back when rap music was really good.

Mize...thoughts on your dad's draft...did he listen to your advice?

I'm not thrilled with any of my fantasy teams this year, but we'll see what happens. I'm just glad footyball is here.

Every year my guard weekend falls on opening weekend of the NFL and the Bears usually play a noon game. We also used to have a guard weekend on Super Bowl weekend until one of our commanders nixed that idea. It was a female commander at that.

Female commander? Nonsense! Was she commanding the kitchen staff? /Lp

Should we get rid of tips in restaurants?

Go!

Wednesday, September 04, 2013

NFL Preview

Season starts tomorrow.  Here are my predictions and a tidbit about each team.

NFC EAST
1. Redskins - RGIII and Alfred Morris in an overrated division
2. Cowboys - Tony Romo has weapons and a sense of urgency this year
3. Giants - not a bad season, probably 8-8, but their defense is awful and no running game
4. Eagles - Chip Kelly will kill Michael Vick by week 4, and then it's the Nick Foles show

NFC NORTH
1. Packers - Rodgers will be discount double checking his way to 11-5
2. Lions (WC) - Yes, I picked the lions here, assuming Suh doesn't kill a man
3. Bears - Is this the season Jay Cutler becomes a star...doubtful
4. Vikings - I love purple jesus, but he won't have more than 1,500 yards this season

NFC SOUTH
1. Saints - Revenge tour for Sean Payton
2. Bucs (WC) - Year 2 of Greg Schiano and Doug Martin, Gholston and Revis help the worst pass defense in the NFL last year.
3. Panthers - Cam Newton has a better season, but he's not even in the top 5 of the mobile/athletic QBs anymore
4. Falcons - disappointing season for a team that is loaded on offense

NFC WEST
1. Seahawks - Best young QB in the NFC, Lynch will be in beast mode, and they don't lose at home.
2. 49ers - Kaepernick was a great story last year.  So was Michael Vick his first year in the league, lets see Colin do it again, this time without any WR. Will have trouble scoring points.
3. Arizona - Bruce Arians can coach QBs, and i'm betting he gets one more good season out of Carson Palmer.
4. Rams - Tough division.  At what point do they give up on Bradtard?  Tavon Austin will be fun to watch.  You know you're in trouble when you WR corps has 2 rookies from WaVa and 2 second year guys from Wake Forest and Appalachian State. And you have a fragile QB, backed up by Kellen Clemens.

Wild Cards come out of the easier divisions.  NFC is loaded this year.

NFC Playoffs
Saints over Lions
Bucs over Skins

Seahawks over Bucs
Saints over Packers

Saints over Seahawks


AFC EAST
1. Patriots - by default, this division is just awful year in and year out, good for 11 wins easy every year.
2. Dolphins - Tannehill takes a step forward.  Defense is a little better.  Just on the outside of the playoff picture, probably 9-7
3. Bills - Rookie head coach, rookie QB, no running game, no defense.  Maybe win 4 games, maybe.
4. JETS - should have picked up Tebow as opposed to Dr. Quinn, would have at least been entertaining.

AFC NORTH
1. Bengals - Marvin Lewis has slowly built a very good defense, and has started to surround Ginger with some really good weapons.  AJ Green is the truth.
2. Steelers (WC) - They were in re-loading/rebuilding mode last year.  They always seem to find guys to replace guys.  Really need Polomalu to stay healthy for 16 games.
3. Browns - Because I hate the Ravens
4. Ravens - I hope Joe Flacco's arm falls off

AFC SOUTH
1. Texans - Will have another solid season, followed by disappointment in the playoffs again.  Matt Schaub is Tony Romo of the AFC.
2. Titans - Division is really weak
3. Colts - Take a step back.  They'll miss Bruce Arians, and don't have the Pagano love story.  Luck will be better, but he doesn't have the weapons around him for another run.
4. Jaguars - Who is the best QB in college football this year? Could Bridgewater be running this offense next year?

AFC WEST
1. Broncos - Even with all the turmoil, should be able to fall out of bed and win 11 games in a weak AFC.
2. Chiefs (WC) - Ravens are probably true WC team, but I hate them.  Old Andy Reid could prove he has one more good run in him.  Alex Smith with something to prove.  This was a team that had 4 pro-bowl players last year and won 3 games.  Awful coached team last year.
3. Chargers - Phyllis Rivers can't stand in the pocket anymore, you get any little bit of pressure on him and he wilts like a flower in Keith's back yard. Oh, and his offensive line is awful.
4. Raiders - Matt Flynn is going to ride those 2 games with the Packers forever, does he ever start another game?  Raiders defense is horrible.  Their offense would be OK if DMC could stay healthy (AHIIK), and Terelle Pryor will ad lib a lot.  He's the black Tebow, can't throw the ball for shit, but he'll run around like a crazy person.


AFC Playoffs:
Texans over Chiefs
Steelers over Bengals

Broncos over Texans
Steelers over Patriots

Broncos over Steelers.

SUPERBOWL
Broncos over Saints

Yes, I went for it.

Tuesday, September 03, 2013

Finally!

Explorer wouldn't let me edit the post.  Freaking explorer.



FINALLY.  College football has started.  Praise be to someone for sure.  NFL next week.  CAN'T WAIT.



tOSU

The Announcers must have been watching a different game than I was watching.  Apparently they thought Buffalo was winning.  They kept saying things like "if Buffalo can keep this up they'll hold on for the win" that was when they were down by 10.  I don't think staying down by 10 leads to a win.  At no point in time did Buffalo have a chance to win that game.  tOSU certainly showed room for improvement, but they were in 0 danger of losing that game.


WaVA

Well at least I feel better about my tOSU will have more wins by the end of September than WaVa will have all year pick.


JETS

Signed Brady Quinn.  He probably should be their week 1 starter.  Their QBs are either terrible or not even close to being ready for the NFL / possibly terrible.

Pirates

I am almost starting to believe.  That is a terrible sign for them.  If I believe then it will be bad.


tem college football rankings

1 - Bama
2 - Clemson
3 - tOSU
4 - Oregon
5 - Georgia


Next Week
 Begins the countdown of sideline reporters that are hotter than EA. 



Monday, September 02, 2013

Top Of The Page Material:

"Idiots with nothing better to do"





"Most Boston sports fans are just douchebags. Because most people from New England are douchebags." - tem





"Obama got elected because of the Rooney rule" - Jug





"you should never let debt stop you from pro-creating anyway" - El Padrino





"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H





"i'm dumb and sensitive. basically i'm a woman" - L Padrino





"I'm so horny this morning. If there wasn't this sex offender list going around id grope bitches on the train this morning" - L Padrino