Tuesday, May 07, 2013

Frogs don't hop on the moon

Sorry for the delayed post. I had to go have blood drawn because my liver something something was a little high in January. We'll see how it goes today. Well actually tomorrow because that is when they will call me. In any case there was an elderly couple arguing over which Big Bang Theory character was which. They were looking at a TV guide or something with the girls from the show on the cover. At one point they agreed that all 3 girls were Bernadette. Old people are entertaining.


tem vs sayings

Don't judge a book by its cover

Why not? What else am I supposed to judge it by? The whole purpose of the cover is to give me a glimpse of what is inside that book. I say, don't put a shitty cover on a good book. If you want me to read your book make the cover a good one. And if you think that you have such a good book that you don't need to put effort in on the cover then eff you. A little effort is always appreciated. A good book with a shitty cover just thinks it is better than me. It doesn't have to try to get people to read it. Eff that book.


Don't put all your eggs in one basket

I think this is stolen from Family Guy, but seriously, what am I supposed to do? Use one egg per basket and that just seems silly. The whole point of the basket is to store the eggs.


A piece of cake

So it's just sitting out there all free looking and I am going to take it and get yelled at?? Screw that. I know that a piece of cake is just a trap.


Curiosity Killed The Cat

Yeah and satisfaction brought it back.




Bulls

That was surprising. Golden State was almost surprising but they weren't. But the Bulls pulled out a big one. Now they will probably lose 4 straight. I wonder if they go up 3-0 if Rose will come back and then they will lose 4 straight. That would be gold.



Dilbert

this one

I don't get that Dilbert comic.



El Tardo

He now takes 4 weeks to write one column. See: trade value column.


NBA

Seattle should just start a new team with Free Agents. Dwight Howard, Chris Paul, and then some other people. They'd be good enough.

82 comments:

BLUE said...

fuck cats

Aitch said...

Indeed. Cats are terrible.

BLUE said...

time to go watch some boobs jiggle

tem said...

good luck

Aitch said...

Yay Bruins

Vice Presidente said...

stop it

Meiz said...

Enzymes. Too high of a liver enzyme count means either you drink too much or have some form of Hepatitis.

It will make your life insurance company not allow you to increase your policy.

Meiz said...

"I'd tip on the 35. It isn't my job to know the regular prices and go back and recalculate my bill."

This. I echo the sentiments of the others.

tem said...

"Enzymes. Too high of a liver enzyme count means either you drink too much or have some form of Hepatitis."

i might have been drinking the night before or the night before the night before my last test. i dunno.

i might have hepititis H. i got it in vegas.

Meiz said...

"Would like to scheduil this for as close as possible to 10:00 AM"

These are the rock* scientists I have the pleasure of dealing with all day.

BLUE said...

maybe that's italian

Aitch said...

"I'd tip on the 35. It isn't my job to know the regular prices and go back and recalculate my bill."

I actually agree with this, too, believe it or not. Comped is different. Then you still tip on full check.

Aitch said...

"These are the rock* scientists I have the pleasure of dealing with all day."

They're truck drivers, not English majors.

Meiz said...

LOL

I just got a Past Due notice sent to my fax machine for $37.08. This tiny vendor is jamming us up on less than $40. That's funny.

Meiz said...

"They're truck drivers, not English majors."

No, these are people that work in an office. The drivers don't set their routes. That would be hilarious to see though.

Meiz said...

"maybe that's italian"

1st thought I had was replying with "Is that you, Ant?"

Aitch said...

Big morning

Stelio said...

I don't get that Dilbert comic.



For serious?

Stelio said...

The second largest country by land area is Canada, after Russia.

tem said...

"For serious?"

yes.

i don't get it.

Stelio said...

yes.

i don't get it.



The guy's passion is food. He followed it and it made him fat. They put the punchline in the opening scene. So they ended the comic right there because it was done.

tem said...

"The second largest country by land area is Canada, after Russia."

it is the US if you count the countries that we think we own.

tem said...

getting fat isn't funny.

Stelio said...

it is the US if you count the countries that we think we own.



They are still separate countries

Stelio said...

getting fat isn't funny.



The comment wasn't about whether or not it was funny. The comment was that you didn't get it.

Stelio said...

most comics aren't funny.


uncle joey

tem said...

a punchline is supposed to be funny.

tem said...

9-11

i stopped the joke because i put the punchline first.


THAT'S NOT FUNNY /LP


BLUE said...

you don't get today's dilbert, or dilbert in general?

tem said...

i don't get the one i linked.

BLUE said...

oh, you linked one

BLUE said...

i think the moral to the story was he was too lazy to write three cells that day

Stelio said...

that

Jugdish said...

anyone hear the interview with the guy who found/rescued those three chicks in ohio?

"I knew something was wrong when a pretty little white girl ran into the arms of a black man."

BLUE said...

thanks for stealing my comment from yesterday's post

Stelio said...

That could have been cmtem. Pray for her.

/H

Jugdish said...

the 911 call is funny too

Jugdish said...

interview

tem said...

it is big news in temhio

BLUE said...

do you think he might be on tosh.o someday?

Jugdish said...

do you think he might be on tosh.o someday?




guess i missed that one yesterday...here is the 911 call

Vice Presidente said...

cumjugfast

Jugdish said...

jerk



s

Jugdish said...

heading to bossier city, LA for an overnight trip tomorrow night...suite

Vice Presidente said...

i was eatin my macdonalds

you gotta have big testicals

tem said...

say hi to tyler

Vice Presidente said...

lolz

Jugdish said...

he isn't in bossier city

tem said...

well if he is say hi to him.

and spiff.

tem said...

and yes i know what LA stands for

Jugdish said...

i know you do


if it was in a dilbert cartoon that would be a different story

BLUE said...

LA is a bossier city than houston.

those people are just mean

Jugdish said...

wall

BLUE said...

why you gotta be so mean

Jugdish said...

mexico borders texas...pray for me

BLUE said...

we are never ever ever getting back together

Jugdish said...

wall

Stelio said...

like, ever

Stelio said...

wall

Meiz said...

Ha!

One of my friends finally had enough of the bullshit Moms out there complaining about their kids on facebook, so she let them have it. Atta girl.

Meiz said...

Charles Ramsey is finna get Mickey D's for life. They tweeted that they'll be in touch with him soon.

Vice Presidente said...

nice use of finna

Meiz said...

Love finna.

Meiz said...

Gonna blow some minds with all these uniform options I'm adding for our drivers.

Vice Presidente said...

Carrie Underwood is replacing Faith Hill for the Sunday Night Football opener.

Jugdish said...

wall

Stelio said...

wall

tem said...

Wall

tem said...

Sumbitch Stelio

Aitch said...

"One of my friends finally had enough of the bullshit Moms out there complaining about their kids on facebook, so she let them have it. Atta girl."

CnP por favor

Aitch said...

"Carrie Underwood is replacing Faith Hill for the Sunday Night Football opener"

God bless NBC

Tyler said...

I needed a couple of minutes to waste before I leave for the day so I just read this post and it cracked me up. Best part of my day. Great job Tem, don't ever change.

Meiz said...

"CnP por favor"

She may have taken it down(I can't find it) because she probably wasn't ready for the backlash.

Long & short, "Young & new moms, stop complaining about having to clean up messes, not being able to sleep, not being able to get baby to sleep and deal with it. You don't have a job. You don't have to go to work every day and leave your baby behind. I actually have to go to work M-F and would give it up if it meant I got to spend every waking minute with my baby like you do. Maybe you need to log off Facebook and give your child a hug & a kiss"

That's pretty much EXACTLY what she said.

Meiz said...

"I needed a couple of minutes to waste before I leave for the day"

IS THIS WHAT WE'VE BECOME???

Aitch said...

That is awesome.

Meiz said...

And she just had a baby in February. Until a few years ago, I never realized how many of these chicks have a kid/kids and just don't go back to work. I still can't believe it.

Tyler said...

IS THIS WHAT WE'VE BECOME???

Man, I have to do my job and now my boss' job so there is ZERO time to screw off. Being responsible sucks.

tem said...

I ATE THE BONES

Vice Presidente said...

morning

Aitch said...

Yes it is

Vice Presidente said...

joker

BLUE said...

go time

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