Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Pooptastic

Bud Light Commercial

I find the girl in it strangely attractive. I usually dislike short hair and bug eyes, but she still looked good. I am confused. Speaking of bug eyes, a girl was at the bar on Friday with bug eyes, I don't know if Keith was still there or not. Anyway, her husband had bug eyes too. Their kid will have big bug eyes. Hopefully no anntennae. Too many n's.


Heat

I so don't care about the Heat streak. I hope they lose at Chicago. When is Rose coming back? I wonder how many times a day that gets asked by Chicago fans. I think seven per fan.


NCAA

In the majority of my brackets I picked Florida Gulf coast to beat G'town. I also picked Wichita State to beat Gonzaga. Everything else I basically got wrong. So I have 2 plusses and about 100 minuses. I am grading out at a D-. At least this year I was expected to pick horribly, other years I expected more. Not this year. I had low expectations and I didn't exceed them.


Mark Titus

Kid is on Grantland. Total OSU homer. Not a terrible writer. Honestly reminds me of a young sports guy. Although I am still unsure whether he is retarded enough to be a sports guy. He dropped a Futurama reference in his last article. I don't know if it is on purpose or not. It was old school Futurama too, not the newer episodes....when do new ones start again?


Cartoons

Cartoons I watch in no particular order.....Simpsons, Archer, Family Guy, American Dad, Futurama and sometimes the Cleveland show. I don't watch South Park because it must be on at a wierd time or something.


Sun Belt

Sun Belts adds two teams. It might get an auto bid over the Big East...oh wait, playoffs soon baby! I can't wait for the argument over which team got fucked out of that 4th spot.


NASCAR

Tony Stewart says they should let the guys fight like hockey and it just ends when someone goes to the ground. Umm, YES! Great idea. Anyone who thinks NASCAR doesn't need drama or fights or wrecks to make it interesting is just kidding themselves. It seriously is cars going in a circle. One of the things that makes it watchable is when two drivers fight after the race and then race next to each other the next race. You can seriously watch like 10 laps of two guys that hate each other go in circles and it is entertaining.


Landscape

Cmtem says we need to have someone do landscaping this spring because she can't. So I have to meet the landscape guy to get a quote...I have no idea why he needs to come here. Can't I just tell him how many feet I want mulched? Now I have to sit here and wait for him to show up and show him the 75 feet I want mulched. Some is on a downhill, I wonder if that increases the price...Maybe he will say it is an uphill and charge more? Crafty landscapers. I didn't brush up on any Spanish either, so this might be a huge clusterfuck.




164 comments:

Jugdish said...

Speaking of bug eyes, a girl was at the bar on Friday with bug eyes, I don't know if Keith was still there or not. Anyway, her husband had bug eyes too. Their kid will have big bug eyes.


maybe the two sets of bug eyes will cancel each other out

tem said...

damn landscape guy is late.

tem said...

he just called. his gps sent him to the wrong place.

fucking gps is a great excuse.

tem said...

when i am late for work now i am going to say the gps sent me to the wrong work.

Jugdish said...

ive had 3 landscape guys between my two houses...all names jose

Jugdish said...

i finally fixed my lawn mower so i had to let the latest jose go. i felt a bad because he was a nice guy and probably needs the money. it'll save me $80 a month though

Vice Presidente said...

way to stimulate the economy jug

no w jose will turn to crime and this is why the illegals catch a bad rap, they want to work, just not enough work out there

Jugdish said...

no w jose will turn to crime and this is why the illegals catch a bad rap, they want to work, just not enough work out there


he mows a lot of lawns in our neighborhood

Vice Presidente said...

his family is hungry, got 9 lil joses running around on rice and fumes

Jugdish said...

one of his joses works with him too

Vice Presidente said...

his jose has a kid, he's an abeulo

Vice Presidente said...

whether you hire him back or dont you are still part of the % that pays for his food so it's all good

BLUE said...

"he mows a lot of lawns in our neighborhood"

you don't mow another guy's lawn

tem said...

i like mowing the lawn. mulching sucks ass though.

tem said...

mulching and planting bushes, shrubs, flowers, whatever sucks.

lawn stuff is ok.

Jugdish said...

mulching and planting bushes, shrubs, flowers, whatever sucks.



we put a yard and a half of mulch in our front yard a couple of weeks ago. it wasn't fun. mulching wasn't as bad as digging up grass in some areas. yeah, yard stuff sucks

Vice Presidente said...

there was something out there from freeman of cbs saying a known NFL player is seriously considering coming out of the closet and he is more worried about the fans reactions than inside the locker room......

tem said...

probably eli

Vice Presidente said...

yard stuff sucks

jose

Jugdish said...

probably eli


ha

Jugdish said...

jose



cheaper to do the yard stuff ourselves

jose got fuloughed

tem said...

mulching is ok if you just throw the mulch down and spread it. but if you weed and make sure you do it right it sucks.

Vice Presidente said...

"cheaper to do the yard stuff ourselves"

not cheaper on your body though

BLUE said...

victor cruz is the gay dude

Vice Presidente said...

he does love his mama

Vice Presidente said...

ronde seems gay to me

BLUE said...

"he does love his mama"

so does the waterboy

tem said...

ronde wouldn't shock me 1 bit.

tem said...

if it was tebow that would be the biggest news story ever.

Vice Presidente said...

holy crap yes

Vice Presidente said...

tiger woods is a legend?

tem said...

i would say yes.

he is a legend in golfing and wife cheating on.

BLUE said...

yeah, he's legendary

Jugdish said...

not cheaper on your body though



you'd think its good to get out in the yard and work, but then if you factor in the beer

BLUE said...

if will smith is legend, then tiger most certainly is

Jugdish said...

Lp

Vice Presidente said...

he might be legend at crushing white pussy but to call him a legend in golf is almost too early no?

Vice Presidente said...

i guess he stacks up with those guys though stat wise

does he have that major record?

also remember, like baseball, the technology in the equipment has made a huge difference in comparing players from one generation to another

hogan and those guys were using wooden sticks not titanium

Vice Presidente said...

courses were easier though, course design now is outrageous

Jugdish said...

hogan and those guys were using wooden sticks not titanium



right, but its not like tiger is playng against people using the wooden sticks

Keef said...

It would take about three years of nonstop pedaling to bike to the moon.

Keef said...

a girl was at the bar on Friday with bug eyes, I don't know if Keith was still there or not



Yeah we talked about her for like 15 minutes

Keef said...

you were drunk

Keef said...

Kid is on Grantland. Total OSU homer.


Maybe because he played at tOSU?

Keef said...

Hogan and those guys were using wooden sticks not titanium



And everyone he was playing against was using the same clubs

Keef said...

jug knows

Jugdish said...

It would take about three years of nonstop pedaling to bike to the moon.


2.5 for my niece

tem said...

"Maybe because he played at tOSU?"

more than likely that is the reason.

Jugdish said...

tiger did a lot of damage with his wood


/elin

Keef said...

Can't wait for Spring Training to be over. That will cut traffic by about 39%.

Meiz said...

South Park comes on after Tem's bedtime

Meiz said...

FYI, I'll be having a restart on my NCAA record. I kicked off and immediately decided I didn't want to play.

Jugdish said...

that kickoff was returned for a td, wasn't it?

Meiz said...

LP should never ever talk about golf

Keef said...

FYI, I'll be having a restart on my NCAA record. I kicked off and immediately decided I didn't want to play.



Happens to me all the time.

/blue

Meiz said...

"that kickoff was returned for a td, wasn't it?"

Touchback. My new K is a beast.

Keef said...

LP should never ever talk about golfing



*fized

Keef said...

Touchback. My new K is a beast.


I have a K. He carries a clipboard. My P does all my kickoffs and FGs and extra points

Keef said...

tOSU gave up a FG against the Hokies. They have to run extra sprints this week.

tem said...

good story.

are we doing baseball this year?

Meiz said...

Man, FM 106 is really gonna ram this new Blake Shelton single down our throats, hey?

Keef said...

not mine

BLUE said...

hey, i haven't had to restart once this season...



yet

BLUE said...

does EP like bourbon?

Keef said...

He likes movies with gladiators

Keef said...

anyone see Tosh last week where the dude cut off his own nipple? Shit made me nauseous

ToddPacker said...

"anyone see Tosh last week where the dude cut off his own nipple? Shit made me nauseous"

^^^^^^^^^^^^

had to look away

ToddPacker said...

ep is way off on his tiger comments

Jugdish said...

"anyone see Tosh last week where the dude cut off his own nipple? Shit made me nauseous"



just watched it...gross

Jugdish said...

hilarity

Keef said...

ep is way off on his tiger comments



yep

Keef said...

but Tiger uses better equipment than Palmer, Hogan, Nicklaus used, so he should be better than everyone else


(S)

tem said...

"Man, FM 106 is really gonna ram this new Blake Shelton single down our throats, hey?"

same here. i don't like the song very much either.

Keef said...

we're having 22 people at our house for Easter. Fucking # keeps growing every year. Kind of annoying

tem said...

22 people??? goddman.

tem said...

hopefully they aren't all there at once.

Keef said...

22 people total, counting me, cmk & bgas

Keef said...

hopefully they aren't all there at once.



We don't serve food in shifts

Meiz said...

"we're having 22 people at our house for Easter. Fucking # keeps growing every year. Kind of annoying"


Man, you gotta say no to that shit

Meiz said...

My Mom gave up on the big family holiday shit a while ago. Even just going to someone else's house is a hassle.

Keef said...

Man, you gotta say no to that shit



ok

Jugdish said...

Fucking # keeps growing every year. Kind of annoying"



you keep having kids


s

Keef said...

SPK has a new berry flavor pack. They're delicious.

Keef said...

A 44-year-old immigrant from the Dominican Republic is the winner of a $338 million Powerball lottery jackpot in the U.S., and he’s telling reporters in Spanish that he’s “very happy.”



Fucking illegals

/LP

tem said...

i didn't think immigrants could actually win.

tem said...

wait, it didn't say illegal immigrant.

Keef said...

racist

tem said...

but seriously, i think only US citizens can win.

tem said...

"We don't serve food in shifts"

maybe you should.

Vice Presidente said...

does EP like bourbon?

yes he does

Vice Presidente said...

in regards to my tiger comment and wooden sticks

meant in the way the game has advanced and getting 27 majors or whatever is the stat out there you measure these pussies by fill it in, they were doing it without the help of modern technology

similar to beisbol, babe ruth hit hr's in gigantic parks fueled by cigarettes, whiskey and hamburgers

now half of the parks in mlb are bandboxes

Vice Presidente said...

i aksed the question because i saw the commercial calling tiger a legend, was just asking is he one already?

Vice Presidente said...

if it's yes then shit yes i dont give a fuck i hate him and everyone in golf

BLUE said...

that's a different comparison

BLUE said...

babe ruth is legend because he was so much better than those during his era


if babe put up the same numbers today, he'd be pretty damn good, but not sure he'd be legend

BLUE said...

but if you extrapolated babe's numbers and said, in todays game he'd hit 1200 HRs in his career.

then that's a different story

Jugdish said...

that's a different comparison


^^^^^^^^^^^^

tem said...

golf to baseball analogy is full of too many holes.

Jugdish said...

that's because baseball is still using wood sticks

/Lp

Vice Presidente said...

fuck holes

that's what i do

Vice Presidente said...

nicklaus compared to tiger

go

BLUE said...

nicklaus was good

tiger is good


BLUE said...

nicklaus probably played against lesser competition


there is more money and more popularity in the sport, thus more better players from around the world

Vice Presidente said...

what advantages, if any, does each have playing in their respective era's?

Jugdish said...

my anus

Keef said...

meant in the way the game has advanced and getting 27 majors or whatever is the stat out there you measure these pussies by fill it in, they were doing it without the help of modern technology



But everyone was doing it without modern technology. We're not looking at Tiger and saying wow, look at how low his scores are. Golf is 100% about how many wins you have. He's winning against people that have the same technology he has. Just like Hogan/Palmer/Nicklaus were beating people who used the same clubs they had.

Aitch said...

22 people total, counting me, cmk & bgas

Typical holiday growing up was 30+ people at the grandparents' house. That shit gets crazy.

Keef said...

27 majors is close

(S)

Keef said...

Typical holiday growing up was 30+ people at the grandparents' house. That shit gets crazy.



OK jug's niece

Keef said...

but seriously, i think only US citizens can win.



I haven't seen anything that says that. It looks like anyone can win

Aitch said...

Or I was just agreeing with you that it was annoying. However you wish to interpret that is fine with me.

Keef said...

Aitch is back and defensive as ever

Jugdish said...

not my problem

Vice Presidente said...

"22 people total, counting me, cmk & bgas"


big deal, cry me a river

Vice Presidente said...

"Just like Hogan/Palmer/Nicklaus were beating people who used the same clubs they had."

the comparasion is not Tiger vs field or Hogan/Palmer/Nick

comparasion is nicklaus (legend) to Tiger (legend apparentaly)

Keef said...

big deal, cry me a river



Can you even fit 22 people in your shack?

Vice Presidente said...

"Can you even fit 22 people in your shack?"

yes 26 this year

WORK

Jugdish said...

little people though, not the same




s

Keef said...

yes 26 this year



you're a hero

Vice Presidente said...

and you're a wussbag

Keef said...

ok

Keef said...

I hope I can still sleep tonight

BLUE said...

if you're asking me if Tiger in his prime could be jack in his prime, given the same equipment and course setup.

the answer is "i don't know, i'm not columbo"

Jugdish said...

yes 26 this year



probably against the fire code for Lp's place

Vice Presidente said...

you're all forgetting i have a veranda

Vice Presidente said...

with gorgeous views of immigrants hanging clothes to dry

Keef said...

veranda holds like 6 people

Meiz said...

Isn't a veranda like a balcony, or am I mistaken?

Vice Presidente said...

those are some fat ass people

Jugdish said...

wall

Keef said...

those are some fat ass people


You could probably stuff 20 people out there.

Jugdish said...

maybe he fed them in shifts

tem said...

you all forget that el pad's family averages like 5'2".

26 el pad's is like 19 normies.

Keef said...

maybe

tem said...

how many people is jug's neice hosting?

Keef said...

you all forget that el pad's family averages like 5'2".



maybe they're tubbies

BLUE said...

teletubbies

BLUE said...

besides the irish aren't fat

Jugdish said...

toilet games

Jugdish said...

wall

Vice Presidente said...

they gave locthe his own reality show, he is embracing this dumb ass thing

Keef said...

wall

Vice Presidente said...

i had fla gulf coast in suite 16 too tem

so you arent that smrt*

Keef said...

Manti Te'o ran his long-awaited 40-yard dashes Tuesday at Notre Dame's pro day and was slightly faster than he was at last month's NFL scouting combine.
ESPN's Todd McShay timed Te'o at 4.75 seconds in his first 40 and 4.71 seconds in his second.
The times represent an improvement upon his 4.82-second 40 from the combine by somewhere around one-tenth of a second.
"I just expected to run faster than I did at the combine," he said. "That's exactly what I did."



Yeah, yahuge improvement

(S)

Keef said...

i had fla gulf coast in suite 16 too tem




I didn't do a bracket this year

tem said...

i did not have them in suite 16, just beating g'town.

Vice Presidente said...

i did

i should win

Vice Presidente said...

tp nervous about the matchup

i say gators blow them out

Vice Presidente said...

i also had harvard

Vice Presidente said...

but i also had creighton

::sad face::

Vice Presidente said...

and butler

Vice Presidente said...

still gots my final fo'

Vice Presidente said...

piece

BLUE said...

fucking gonzaga

Jugdish said...

good morning

Jugdish said...

got my tax return today...suite

Jugdish said...

and its gone

Vice Presidente said...

woe

Jugdish said...

no woe...less debt = suite

Vice Presidente said...

you will buy more debt

Jugdish said...

of course...probably getting a new vehicle this year.

Jugdish said...

at the end of the year

Jugdish said...

Griner has 3 dunks in Baylor's win


womens basketball headlines are funny

BLUE said...

new post

Top Of The Page Material:

"Idiots with nothing better to do"





"Most Boston sports fans are just douchebags. Because most people from New England are douchebags." - tem





"Obama got elected because of the Rooney rule" - Jug





"you should never let debt stop you from pro-creating anyway" - El Padrino





"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H





"i'm dumb and sensitive. basically i'm a woman" - L Padrino





"I'm so horny this morning. If there wasn't this sex offender list going around id grope bitches on the train this morning" - L Padrino