Friday, November 30, 2012

Mariah Carey sings the best Christmas songs.

Powerball as a loss so here are some winning picks to make you all feel better.

Jax+6 over Buffalo
Henne time.

CHICAGO -3.5 over Seattle
Was it the Seahawks who upset the Bears a two years ago when they got into the playoffs at 7-9?  Cutty never forgets.

Indy +4.5 over DETROIT
No business giving points to anyone in the League.

Vikes +8.5 over GREEN BAY
I mean who is blocking Jared Allen.

Houston -6 over TITANS
Schaub has found some passing game.

KC +3 over Oh Carolina Oh line oh oh oh line
This one seals Ron Riveria's fate.

St. LOUIS +7 over San Fran
Give me those points.  Gonna be rough on Bradtard* but I think Fisher, once again this guy gets every ounce of his team most of the time.  I like points here.

New England -7.5 over MIAMI
I mean how can you pick against the Pats right now.  En fuego.

JETS -4.5 over Arizona
About the only team the Jets can give points too. Even a Jag game would be a pick em.

Tampa +7 over DENVER
Broncos are hot, at home and play good defense.  Schiano has nuts of steel.  He don't give a shit.

Oakland over Cleveland in the Who gives a shit bowl.

Cincy -2 over CHARGERS
Bengals playing well right now.

Ravens over Steelers in the sick of this rivarly bowl. 

Philly +10 over DALLAS

TEN?  Points?  When is the last time Dallas covered a double digit spread?

GGGGGGGGGGGMMMMMMMMEEEEEENNNNNNNNNN feeling it right now.


Thursday, November 29, 2012

Powerball

One of the winning tickets was sold in AZ...Keef??? I didn't buy any tickets. I meant to stop by a gas station and pick up about $20 worth, but I got side tracked. In a related story...I didn't win. Keef?

I know some of you guys don't like Caliendo, but his impression of Gruden is really good. I heard it on Mike and Mike this morning and for a moment, thought it was Gruden. He also did a good Ditka and Holtz.

Good trip to Chicago over Thanksgiving. Cmjug, like most people raised in the South, hates the cold and was worried about the weather before we went up there. She almost packed for the trip like I do for a ski trip. The weather up there was great while we were there. Good times visiting family, although a little sad to see the shape my grandmother is in right now.

Are you ready for more steroid in baseball talk? I'm not going to talk about it anymore in this post, but it'll be all over the media. Maybe Favre will make another comeback so there is something else to talk about.

Poor Alex Smith...where do you think he will end up next year? I say Jets. There aren't a lot of good QBs coming out in the draft, and there are at least 5 teams that need a new QB.

I better get to work...GO!



Wednesday, November 28, 2012

back and better than something

Have you ever wondered why commercials always tout things as the best ____ ever built.  For example, Chevy and their new Malibu.  They finish the commercial with "the best malibu ever".  Well of course you think that.  I you weren't making improvements to the product, why would you redesign it.  I know that designers don't think..."gee, this is a pretty good product, lets see if we can make one that's not quite as good."  Microsoft is the same way.  Well if windows 8 didn't have "advances in technology" then you wouldn't spend all the r&d money to develop it.

You can never have enough flash drives.

The CU job search debacle has gone crazy.  Now Mike Bohn (who i know from my Idaho days, and hate) is being called a racist.  4-21, black or white, and people quit showing up to games..you're gonna get fired.  A guy I work with is a CU season ticket holder, and for the Utah game last week, they sent out an email offering as many tickets as you want, all you had to pay was the $1.50 handling fee.  So he got 4 extra tickets for $6.

I've spent a lot of time in Idaho the last couple weeks, and that feels like home to me.  The big difference now though when I go there, I notice that everyone is a redneck/country.  Meiz would love it and hate it there.  But my cousin just bought a 4 bedroom house pretty close to Boise for $115k, and his mom bought a 3 bedroom condo for $85k.  That's pretty f'ing cheap...the housing bubble hit them pretty hard, but sheesh.  It's not like it's Kansas or nebraska...Boise is a nice place to live.

The big story in Boise the 2 weeks i was there was this.  They talked about it on the news non-stop for 4 days.  Even breaking into the football game to announce that they had made an arrest.

When will the russian roulette of college football realignment end?  I'm moving towards agreeing with Nick Saban that they should have roughly 70-80 schools in D-1, and those teams should not be allowed to "play down" against the other divisions.  Then again, he's pissed because he won't be going to a BCS bowl this year.

Arkansas is trying to hire Les Miles?  I don't think that sounds very ethical.  I think he has a job.







 

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Stinky Shit

Normal stinky shit to follow. At least I post.


NHL News

The Penguins have the most points, they must be the best team. I bet at least 1 person reading this believes that. Hey, they are led by #87. #87 is a good player. People in Vegas recognize his "sweater".

No idea why it is called a sweater. WTF? It isn't like any sweater I have ever owned. It is a lot like a bunch of jerseys I have. Fucking Canadians I bet.


Arafat's body exhumed in murder inquiry

Not sure why they are just doing this now. I mean they just now found out that all his stuff had a toxic chemical all over it? I don't think so. They knew that for years. So now they just got around to releasing the info?? WFT? Governments...they are wierd and do dumb shit.


Crap


What site do you guys use for news? I use Yahoo! and CNN. Should I hit up fox or some other place. And don't say the Onion. That is not real. I know Jugbeth was going to say the Onion. Or Deadspin. I don't know what Deadspin is really. Is it gossip or real? Real Gossip?

You fuckers talked me into getting new phones for cmtem and me. We went with the Galaxy 3 thing. Certified preowned. I don't know where Verizon gets these. They just came out, why are people returning them already? Probably because they are broke so Verizon just resold them to me. Fucking Verizon. Anyway, I told cmtem that she needs to make me a video like that chick in the commercial did. That chick in the commercial is hot. Like sneaky hot. Like the gymnast chick with the mean face. She is sneaky hot. Probably has no boobs since she is a gymnast, but still sneaky hot.

Why the fuck are all the CBs in the league taking adderal? WFT does that stuff do that makes it irrestible to CBs? At least 4 have been suspended this year for it. Maybe more. And how do you accidentally take it? Bullshit. I think the excuse is "someone put it in my soy latte as a goof, they thought it was funny"

NETS...NETS.....NETS.....N....E.....T....S....NETS..NETS..NETS. El pad loves the NETS.

Nick Saban shouldn't bitch about the BCS being fair.

I am not that impressed with the ND LB getting Heisman hype. He does his job, he is where he is supposed to be. He is slightly better than the tOSU linebacker who started the season as a fullback. The ND guy is solid. He is great. But he isn't Heisman material. Sorry.

Cmtem lost her fantasy game by 0.35 points. Jonathan Stewart did her no favors last night. Did he get hurt? WFT?

Friday, November 23, 2012

Black Friday

Anyone else working?

Did Suh kick Schaub on purpose? I'm not so sure honestly. Despite his history, I have a hard time believe that as he is being upended, he had the presence of mind to try to kick Schaub in the groin. I'll buy that he maybe tried to hit him SOMEWHERE, but I don't know...

Is there any way that Rex Ryan isn't fired immediately following this season?

So I'm reading up on the horrible call in the HOU/DET game. A lot of people are barking about the rule that made the play unreviewable. I will say this, I think the actual rule is a good one. Let me explain. The rule doesn't apply solely to throwing the challenge flag, but rather ANY penalty that delays the next snap. Let me restate that. ANY penalty that delays the next snap makes the prior play unreviewable. Why is that a good rule you ask? Imagine a team running up to the line to get a snap off after a questionable play. This rule is the only thing that prevents the defensive team from intentionally jumping offside to buy their coaches more time to decide if they want to challenge. Again, I'll listen to the argument that throwing the red flag shouldn't result in a penalty, but, much like the Giants faking injuries to slow down the opposing team's no huddle, what's to prevent a coach from throwing a red flag with the same intent?

I hope every one of you had a great holiday with your friends and loved ones.

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

I guess it's my turn

I'm back in Idaho again.  I was here the weekend of the summit for my Grandpa's 90th birthday.  Then had to turn around and come back for my Grandma's (other side of the family) funeral.

I'm glad I don't have a lot of siblings.  Sounds like there is going to be a huge fight for the money grab.  I get being sad at a funeral, but some of her kids hadn't seen her in over 20 years, you can't be that sad.  Maybe they were just sad that they hadn't made an effort...fucking losers.

anyway...

So Boise State is saying they are 100% committed to the big least.  Ha.  That is until the Big 12 calls, or more schools leave the least and you're stuck with Temple and a bunch of really shitty schools.  As if they aren't stuck with a bunch of shitty schools there already.

Nick Saban said he imagined a world in where there were 5 mega conferences with 16 schools each.  Those 80 schools only played each other, and that would be the top tier of CFB and determine the national champion.  I kind of like that.  I'd go one further and have relegation, just like in that Euro soccer league.  If you suck for a certain amount of time (maybe over a 4 year period), your school gets relegated to the lower division.  Good Bye CU.  That would prevent the hangers on from just fielding shitty teams so they could get the major paydays.  It would probably take some adjusting, but forcing you to drop the bottom 2 teams from your conference every 4 years, and replace them with 2 teams from the lower tier, sounds like a plan.  Then once your in that top group, you're guaranteed to be there for at least 4 years.

I could be a conference commissioner.

Whatta gotta Gaza?

Everyone have a happy and disease free thanksgiving




Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Again


MNF
So I guess coach Harbaugh hates Alex Smith. He basically just said that Kaepernick did good so the job is his. He says he is going with the hot hand. Well one guy just beat the Bears and the other guy just got over a concussion. Guess which one is the hot hand. I guess Bowe and Fitzgerald are happy. Smith will be QBing for Arizona or Kansas City next year.

In any case I didn't watch the game, but Vernon Davis did well. He was mad that Keith traded him in the LOV league and basically made sure that the Stone Cone Killers didn't lose.


Cavaliers' Irving out month with broken finger
Whatta got 9 others? Use them. The moral of the story here is truly God or someone with power over sports hates Cleveland.


Beckham will leave Galaxy after final
Fucking aliens are here and they play soccer. Good riddens buddy. But leave your wife here. She is hot.


Big Least
They had a run. Maybe a good run. But it is ending soon. Rutgers, gone. Pitt, gone. WVU, gone. UConn, wants to be gone. Syracuse, gone. Boise State, doesn't want to join. San Diego State, doesn't want to join. Minus swell just combine with Conference USA at this point. Maybe WVU can come back and dominate because the Big 12 certainly is not treating them well. Maybe you do need a defense to play.


Tavon Austin
Forget about Geno Smith, this is the guy that makes WVU a watchable team. Kid is amazing. I wish he'd get just a little Heisman love. Like if you do a top 5 list maybe he is 5th. I am biased and I would put him 3rd. Kid has some serious stats going and if you watch him play you'll know you are watching a good player. Too bad he is only 160 pounds. I don't know if he translates to the next level well.


OK, it is late I am going to post this. I have a meeting soon.

Monday, November 19, 2012

Stuff

UFC fights were OK this weekend. GSP fight was good, at least I thought so. I thought he looked a little rusty or Condit was better than I thought. Either way I think GSP should Hendricks next and not Silva. Hendricks looked good again. I bet GSP does Silva then Hendricks though. GSP vs Silva fight will make tons of money.


OSU fans with their "we would be playing for the national title if only...." talk is insufferable. Blame Tressel I guess. Or Gee or whoever's fault it really was. Your school did some bad shit, they don't get to play in a bowl, get over it. Oh and apparently I am a Notre Dame fan now. I learnt that in church yesterday. We cheer for OSU and Notre Dame. I cheer for neither...I hope they don't kick me out of the club.

Random Thoughts

When does Blue hear about that Idaho job? Stunning silence on the bluevorce talk from him. I have a bad feeling about that.

I made enchiladas for dinner yesterday. They were OK. Actually they were the best ever. The best shit is anything from Ohio.

Anyone know who Mr. Reeves is?

How come there are no black people boy bands? Did the Jackson 5 ruin that or something? You'd think there would be some serious money in throwing together a boy band of all black kids. Did Boyz II Men count?

I did not enjoy Family Guy or American Dad last night.

I watched that Last Resort show. It is getting cancelled. I am terrible luck for things.

I think I have pancreatis. I don't know how to spell it though.

Did H start a new band?

My friend is fuck buddies with a chick from his work. That won't end well.

I had Andre Johnson on my bench in a fantasy league I forgot I was in.

Ed Hoculi's arms are smaller than they used to be.

Browns fans are the best. They cheer even though everyone knows it isn't going to end well for them.

Nothing is worse than watching UFC fights with a guy who just says "see, right here, I'd just break his neck. Twist. BOOM. Fight OVER. Its OVER MAN. Broken neck. Right there, I'd break his NECK!"

Why don't dogs and cats mate? Are they just not attracted to each other? Is a dog in heat just stank to a male cat?

Jim Rome on Showtime? Please tell me this is his last stop.

USC trying to Ewing effect a victory against ND.

Saw Greg Oden at a bar yesterday. Best way to describe him is awkward. He is so tall and nothing is made to fit him. He is rich though, so good for hm. No idea why all his friends were Indian though.

I also did not enjoy the Simpsons last night.

This is enough. I should do work.

Friday, November 16, 2012

EL PADRINO'S PICKS brought to you by MY DIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

First thing is first.  My condition:

Had some tequilla with lime on ice as soon as I walked in the door.
I got a few beers in my system and i've prepared a jack daniels and coke beverage for this post.  It's in the freezer right now (in a cocktail shaker, iz be fancy), I like it borderline slushed.  Weird but when I'm home why not.  It's my house (well not my house as in I dont own it but I live in it)

This is going to be a good one.  I've got a lot on my mind and I need to decompress.  Dont judge my borderline alcoholism.

PICCCCSS*!!!

ATLANTA +10 over Arizona
Ha, remeber when Arizona was the darling of the NFC talk.  Oh so surprising they beat New England and shit we were all like ah shit we gotz a sleeper team here.  Well Atlanta is all like well im pissed because we lost to our big brother in the division even when they've had a down year and we get no repsect blah blah blah it's like fast forward already to January so we can fucking see what this team is made up.  I think in the off-season Mike Smith put a cougar in the Red Zone and told Matt Ryan not to fear the Red Zone.  Or something like that.  Unfortunate as that is it is our world right now.  Back in the day if you ran the table in the regular season you would win in the playoffs now that isnt the case.  So who knew Roddy White was such a shit talker.  So Matt Ryan you got hair on your peaches or what?

By the way as I was typing this I was arguing with Aitch on text message about the movie The Town.  Random note to keep in ming aitch dont like when you call him a "southie".

My new boss is not a worker.  He just attends meeting all day and creates fire drills. 

DALLAS -8 over Browns
Wonder how it feels to be a lame duck coach in the NFL.  Thinking to yourself when is the next time I will be able to actually do this.  It's pretty rare you get a 2nd crack at this thing.  Pat Shurmur talk.  So the game um, yeah Dallas is going to win by more than 8 because the Cowboys are on a run I called this last week.  They'll have the division lead in 3 weeks after the Giants lose to the Packers the week after this.  YOU WATCH.

Green Bay -3 over DETROIT
Packers all day.  The Lil John song Drink is great.  Makes me want to drink.  Imagine Lil Johns life.  That shit must be suite.  Tem, Lil John is a hip hop artist/hype man/porn actor/director.  When I was in Green Bay we went to Titletown Grill or Bar or some shit like that everything is named titletown its a little bit corny but i had this beer that i remember oh Titletown Brewery I had this 400 Honey Ale and it was really good.  The End.

KC +3.5 over Cincy
Nice home dog here.  Cincy beat a shell of a former Giant team while KC played the shit out of Pittsburgh in Pittsburgh and even managed to almost KILL their big bear of a quarterback so I'd say they are headed in the right direction.  Betcha KC rolls off a few to save Crennel's job. 

Jets +3.5 over RAMS
LOL Jets.  Man this team is like herpes.  Just spreading all over itching pussing all over it's just a shit mess and it is awesome.  It feels so good being on the other side of that.  For years the torment I have had to suffer for being Mets fan, can you believe MOST MET FANS ARE ALSO JET FANS.  Can you imagine how miserable that is.  I mean jesus christ that has to be on par with Browns/Cavs/Indians type shit.  My lord thank god my daddy was a Gmen fan.  No technical analysis here I just like the points like who the fuck are the RAMS to be giving points I mean they are back and all but I still hate thier offense and Brian Schotty vs REX RYAN wHO YA GOT I got rex ryan,  for all his shortcomings as a head coach he can coach the shit out of defense and will look to clown Schotty.  CAN I GET A TEEEBOW?!!?!?!

SKINS -3.5 over Philly
what is with Yahoo with the 3.5's?  Fucking half point trying to get a nigga scarped up.  Scrape ya knees bitch.  Back to the JEts for aminute name me one fucking spanish super star in the NFL.  Aint none homie.  Go back to Guatamelala Sanchezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.  Anyway Bob Griffdog gonna put a fucking stake not a nail in that andy reid coffin.  I'm eating cheese fries.

OH CAROLINA OH MY OH OH OH MY O CAROLINA +1.5 over Tampa
Can a team like the Bucs, a young up and coming medicore at best right now but flashes of great have a letdown game this early?  If they can if they are suseptible to this here it is right now on the road vs cammy cam.  He has been pretty bad this year I must say.  But every dog has his day even keef'sdogs.  they all have thier days all 8 of them

Getting grease on the keyboard.  Plus about kids.  Can blame them for shit.  Grease on keyboard is an easy one. 

HOUSTON -15.5 over Jax
Big line.  Not to bring up cock or anything but In Boogie Nights when Julianne Moore's character (Amber Waves) sets her eyes on Dirk's magic wand she says "This is a giant cock".  That's how I feel about this line.  But Amber Waves takes that giant cock and takes that shit well.  So I'm laying wood too.  Now me and Dirk Diggler have something in common besides a nice package.  We lay WOOD.

New Orleans -5 over RAIDERS
Saints make the tournament.  Who wants a piece of that bet.  Too much talent on this team and I think the defense while statistically bad will come around soon enough to have an impact on December.  Until then let Brees DO WORK SON.  Plus my cousin just broat* me this Hurrican glass thing from N'awlins he went to the Monday night game last week so there is N'awlings magic in the air right now and I feel it.  Carson Palmer trade = LOLZ

I'm not happy about my work situation right now.

Chargers +7.5 over BRONCOS
It's not like I think the Broncos won't win because I think they will but I think they will struggle a little bit.  A little bit.  But it's weird like remember when the Colts were domininant but they had close games with the Texans most times.  Remeber the Sage Rosenfels helicopter fumble that shit was HDH.  This Norv Turner has to be done right?  RIGHT?  DOES AJ SMITH HAVE EYES?  Love a few years back when people would compare River vs Eli.  That shit is LOLZ.

Indy +9.5 over PATS
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.  nine and half points?  Vegas is drunk.  That line is hilarity.  Like Andrew Lucks gives a shit about a road game.  Fuck outta here the Pats secondary is fucking terrible.  Bunch of betty whites out there they all need snicker bars.  The fuck is this fucking line.  I guess it's because the Pats haven't blown a team out really yet so they feel like they are due?  I don't get it.  This Colt team is a sleeper playoff team and got some serious good will going for them.  Maybe they are checking the home/road splits and those trends are sort of nasty on the Colt side.  Jets did blow them out in northenr New Jersey earlier this year and they aint no where near the team the Pats are.  Just remember Chuck Pagano was the Ravens D guy for a few years and you know they gave Brady FITS.  Have to think he has instilled some of that into the D guy on Indy's staff.  Man I feel for that guy and his family.  Dancing with daughters at wedding is some powerful shit.

Baltimore -3.5 over STEELERS
Cmon with the Leftwhich.  You couldnt get a better back up than this giant slow man?  This is poor planning on the Stillirs part.  Chipwhich ice cream sandwhiches are delicious. 

SAN FRAN -5 over Bears
Just can't take the Bears here without their QB.  I mean Campbell is serviceable but not against a jackkked up 49er team on a Monday night.  Cmon.  Why don't you just ask Jason to climb MT Killajamrijo?




Thursday, November 15, 2012

Post Title

Texans fans are playing the "we get no respect" card more and more every week. Granted they've only been good for a season and a half and they are ranked number 1 in most NFL polls, but they aren't getting any respect. Texans fans are the Rodney Dangerfield of the NFL. Houston has that "little brother" feeling to Dallas and its amusing to watch especially because most Dallas fans know it. Outside of their two NBA titles, Houston has a lot of WNBA titles and a few soccer titles. I read about that in OSQ.

The worse* wrestlers.

I need a spot start for me next Thursday (spiff?)...I'll be in Chicago all week. I see some good pizza in my future!

I had Monday and Tuesday off this week...three day work weeks are the better.

I still have yet to see the video of tem puking in the fountain.

That is all...go!

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Safely, not down the reed

I guess Kentucky might not win 40 games this year.

Marlins blew up their team they paid so much to build.  Guess Pujols was right to walk away from their mega offer. 

Knicks are on pace to go 82-0.  I'll officially say, i was wrong about this team, they are the best team in basketball.

Apology accepted /EP

"Stevens, 33, and Solo, 31, applied for a marriage license Thursday, according to King County records. The couple, who have been in a relationship for two months, were reportedly set to be married on Tuesday. There is no word on whether the wedding actually took place." 

Two months?  Are you really that desperate Hope Solo.  She's the anti-jug.

Wife and Kids head to Alabama for the next 9 days today.  I'm going to be drunk a lot while they are gone.

Continuing the JitB theme that spiff started yesterday, the best drunk food in the world is Jack in the Box 2 tacos.  Plus they're only a buck.  For those of you not privy to the JitB world, first off, you suck, second, it's glorious.  Below is what the taco looks like.

 
 
They look like shit, but they taste the awesomeness.  Also, it's the only deep fried taco you'll ever have.  Although i'm not really sure if they qualify as tacos, but tomato/potato.  I also enjoy JitB's taco sauce, it might be better than Taco Bell's.  I said "might"
 
I was in Idaho over the weekend and checked out a local microbrewery. I'm making this my new thing to do when out of town, visit a local microbrewery.  The one in Boise was called Sockeye Brewing Company, named after the Sockeye salmon.  Their slogan is "drink like a fish".  Meiz would like it, if he drank beer, just out of principle alone.
 
 
So if you ever find yourself in Boise, check it out, it was a decent enuff place and had some pretty good brews.  Summit IV, Boise, ID.
 

Roethlisberger is hurt again, Cutler is hurt again, Vick is hurt again, Alex smiff is hurt again..rough weekend, and none of those guys puked into a fountain.
 
 
 
 
 


Tuesday, November 13, 2012

CHILI CHEESE CURLY FRIES

jack in the box has brought back chili cheese curly fries!!!

passed by the local jbox and saw the poster. it’s been about a decade or so (WFT) since they took them off their menu with no warning. I used to eat them on the regular and when one said they no longer had them, I remember going to a second location just to check and being pissed.

They look like this:

but taste like this:

only back for a limited time though, damn

so the lakers hired d’antoni. jim buss is such an unprofessional asshole. hate phil and don’t want to hire him? fine, then don’t meet with him at all. he had an agreement to talk to phil again monday, then he goes and hires d'antoni late sunday night, did this whole thing as a fuck you. jim wants to be like jerry jones, fuck that is SCARY. hope it works out of course but fuck jim, go lakers. whether it works or not, jim is a clown for how he handles things.

mary kate olsen is 26, but tell me her 42 year old boyfriend doesn’t pretend he’s fucking a 12 year old:


terrifying stuff

erykah badu has a huge ass: http://i.imgur.com/eNkav.jpg

that doesn’t count as dat tho since it’s badu. have you ever lied down on the couch and crossed your feet and lied there long enough while watching tv or looking at your phone where your feet aren’t numb but you are not aware of them and without looking at them you would not even be able to tell which foot is on top of the other? anyways, that’s what badu scores on the penis movement scale for me, but whoa, huge ass, someone here might enjoy it.

dem tits:
http://i.imgur.com/jIsX2.jpg

dat ass:
http://i.imgur.com/btam9.gif

russian woman parking, hilarity as usual

wonder if she came back to pick up her passenger whose legs she almost crushed

If that video was a repost

for the blind visitors to our site, s, just love this one

Monday, November 12, 2012

The Hangover - LOV Style

Sitting at the Vegas airport so I'll keep this short. I'm looking out the window and it is such a tease. You can see a few of the casinos on the strip from here, almost like the city is saying, "Haha, you're leaving us!"

I was hoping for a Leaving Las Vegas moment with Elizabeth Shue, but alas, we never ran into each other.

One of the highlights of my weekend was watching legit drunk Tem almost tackle a Korean blackjack dealer. Tem has a soft 16 and clearly, emphatically waves his hand to indicate he wants to stand. Korean guy hits him and then Tem has to take a few more cards, including what would have been the dealers bust cars. As everyone got up to leave the table, a red faced Tem is yelling at the dealer, educating him on the difference between hit and stand. Hilarity.

This post sucks but I'm tired and we needed something up. Deal with it.

Friday, November 09, 2012

EL PICKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! VEGAS EDITION - Vegas baby!

I wonder what it feels like to be inside Alexis Texas.

On to the picks.  Your welcome.

GGGGMMMMEEENNN -4 over BENGALS
Giants keep hearing all week that hear comes the November swoon.  Their record under Coughlin in November is below .500 but they are on the road and somehow I think they are treating this week like some sort of playoff game or statement.  Like that 49er thrashing a few weeks ago.

Titans +6 over MIAMI
Man the Titans ran into one last week huh.  Dolphins are playing well and are probably talking themselves into a playoff spot.  I don't think they can cover a TD this weekend.  Baby steps Dolphins.

Lions -2 over VIKINGS
If they had Harvin I would take the Vikes here.  He is such a game-changer for them.  Got a feeling the Lions reel off a few here then crash in December.  Just a hunch.  Cowboy style.

Buffalo +11 over PATS
I just think they'll backdoor cover here.  VEGAS ALERT - Take the OVER.  OVER.  OVER.  You are welcome.

BUCS -3 over San Diego
Norv.  Cross country trip.  1pm (10am) start.  Bucs got a horse in the backfield and Josh Freeman has been playing very well.  Over 2000 yards, 12 TD's - 5 INT's.

NEW ORLEANS +2.5 over Falcons
When was the last time the Saints were getting points in the Superdome.  You'd have to go back to 2008 for that.  I think the Falcons winning streak has been running on fumes.  Average margin of victory in past 5 games is 6 points.  Only the Philly game was a convincing win (13 points) but they suck ass.

Denver -4 over CAROLINA
They are rolling here.  Elway hit the lottery.  He paid alot for the ticket but it was worth it.  Paired with the John Fox defense this team could be going places.

BALTIMORE -7.5 over Raiders
Ravens are a different team at home.  Check the home/road splits.  Another west coast team playing at 1pm.  Why don't they fly in a few days earlier I don't get it.

Jets +6 over SEAHAWKS
You heard the man.  Jets are making the playoffs.  I think they unleash TEBOW this week and he'll keep it close.  Hawks win because in the end the Jets don't have the playmakers and Russ Wilson is a gem at home.

Dallas -1.5 over PHILLY
Still no Demarco Murray but Dallas is great in November and the Eagles are finished.  Not sure the Eagles owner will fire mid-season but Reid is toast.  He'll be the next coach in Cleveland.  WRITE IT DOWN.

St. Louis +11.5 over NINERS
Don't like this spread.  Think the Rams and Fisher will have something up the old sleeve.  Fisher has experience dealing with a juggernaut in his own division.  I think the team will be super prepared and actually give the fighting Harbaughs a scare.

DA BEARS -1 over Houston
Bum's son will take away Brandon Marshall you better believe it.  It's a Forte game because the Bears will take away Foster as good as he is.

STEELERS -12.5 over Cheifs
This line could be 30 and I'd take it.  Pittsburgh has it's mo back and are protecting Big Ben better than ever. 

Be safe guys have a good trip.  Call me!



Thursday, November 08, 2012

Headlines

"Dad: Petrino has interest in Kentucky opening"

I always find it funny when the media gets quotes from the parents of these guys.

"Rockies choose ex-player Weiss as manager" Thoughts, blue?

"Is End Near for Apple?" It looks like Lp's boycott of Apple is working!

"Women gain wider access to power " WFT?!?! /Lp



Hate to miss Vegas this weekend, but you guys have a great time! Aitch and Rev talked about an east coast summit next year...figure out a city this weekend.

Go!

Wednesday, November 07, 2012

4 MORE YEARS!!!!!!

It wasn't really close.  I still don't understand how these TV stations can call states with like 8% reporting, but that's ok.

It is hilarity to me to see the whole Romney crowd go completely silent when NBC announced Ohio for Obama.  Then they said, well wait, we can still win Ohio.  They were like the fans rooting for a team that's down 10 with 34 seconds to play.  They don't have Tebow so they've got no shot.

I'm all for getting rid of the electoral college, it's antiquated and stupid, but it makes for better drama on TV that's for sure.  I bet the TV stations are the ones who keep supporting that system.  How boring would it be for Brian Williams to keep saying "well, Romney is ahead by 2%, but just wait until we get California". 

I wasn't involved in any politics this year.  But I don't know why I want to go rub it in all the romney supporters faces...Big Bird gives romney a big FU.

I always wanted to hear a real concession speech.  Something like, "you bunch of fucking morons.  Why the hell did you do that. You made the wrong choice today, and you will live to rue the day you chose to disrespect me and my people".  Because seriously, it's not like Mitt has any other opportunities in politics anymore.  He'll go back to outsourcing jobs to China, and being super rich.



OK, enuff politics.  Nuggets won last night.  Broncos are rolling.  The AFC is shaping up nicely to a 3 team race between the Kubiaks, the Bradys, and the Mannings.

Keith, your name is "4 More Years" and your pic is here.

Tuesday, November 06, 2012

Work is tough

Sorry, got pulled into a meeting the second I got to work.

I guess that is cool because it means I am wanted, but it didn't help posting.

My 1 year anniversary was last night. We ate at a steakhouse in town. It was obviously 1,000 times better than anything NYC has to offer because 1) it wasn't in NYC and 2) I don't need a 2. Good times were had by all.

My $$$ fantasy team is bad. Percy Harvin didn't really pan out enough, Stafford was a slight disappointment, Maclin never came around, neither Stephen Jackson or Jamaal Charles were consitent. Every week I am projected to score 120 and then I score 80 because at least 2 players shit the bed. I am going to trade the house for Doug Martin and then tank for the rest of the year. #1 pick for me!


Vegas is going to be fun. I am stoked. I want to watch my new favorite college team play. I need to learn some shit about Alabama and forget shit about WVU. Speaking of WVU they are staring at another 50 something to teen something loss. Dipwads.


Holy buckets and burnt toast. I am trying to get people to say that phrase. It is not working.


Voting today for president Romney was at the top of the page and Bronco Bama was way at the bottom. Inbetween were 5 or 6 people I have not heard of. In any case, I guess they randomize the order, but if not then Romney is going to win Ohio. It was hard to find Bronco.


One of my neices is 2 and a half and not potty trained. Another is 1 and a half and potty trained. I have no idear* when potty training should start, but I don't know why it doesn't start ASAP. Who wants to clean up shit all the time? Can you potty train at 4 weeks? I might try.


I got a new Ipod from cmtem for my anniversary. I needed one. I think I was rocking the Ipod 2 or something. The new one is like 16GB, my old one is either 2 or 4, I can't remember. All I know is that it holds 517 songs. Well about that, it changes a bit depending on what songs I put on there. The new one should hold lots more. I am stoked.


Ohio State fans don't even talk about Jim Tressel anymore. It is like he never existed. They say "John Trassle? Who?"




Monday, November 05, 2012

Doug Martin Is My Hero

Seriously, Doug Martin is singlehandedly saving my fantasy season.  I have nothing other than KUBIAK to thank for him & Reggie Bush. I was busy drafting WRs, and needed RBs. I went Bush, Big Ben, Martin.  Holy fuck.  I'm still not out of the weeds yet, though.  Brandon Pettigrew has been a huge disappointment this year.  Only 2.1 points today.  That's 1 catch for 11 yards.  I blame Linehan & Stafford.

WHATTA GOTTA WEEKEND IN VEGAS???

I'm amped.  I can't wait to get some ya-HUGE jollies from watching Tyler try to keep from laughing when H talks.  That shit's hilarious.

DOUG FUCKING MARTIN!!!  I LOVE THAT KID!!!  SAVING MY SEASON!!!


I'm catering to Tem & Jugbeth from here on out.  The following is a small collection of current country songs I can most tolerate(not including Pontoon). This is relevant because the radio throughout the warehouse & my office area is on FM 106.1 on Tuesdays.  Here we go, in no particular order.

Easton Corbin - Lovin' You Is Fun


Miranda Lambert - Fastest Girl In Town
DISCLAIMER- I don NOT endorse any of the behavior in this song or video.  Just a song I can deal with at work.


Randy Houser - How Country Feels
The chick in this video... Lordy lou. She's a little short, but my goodness.


Eric Church - Creepin'


OH, FUCK IT, LET'S ROCK PONTOON! This is my cut!  Really, this was a YA-Huge summer song of 2012.


And finally, SUMMIT III: VEGAS!
Here's a potential look at Meiz & Aitch left alone with time to kill






Friday, November 02, 2012

lost internets post was lost lick my balls deal with it

it's insane the marathon is a go

INSANE

where they start (lower staten island) is a war zone

they are still pulling bodies out of the water and they are preparing for a marathon

then think about this, the marathon gridlocks the city on a normal day now with the way travel has been how will anyone get around to take care of things

also resources, ememergency workers, sanitation, cash all dedicated to skinny cunts running through the 5 boroughs while breezy point and long island and south brooklyn and staten island are still trying to get the power on and pump water out of the homes

and lower manahattan is still destroyed,

it's insane

Anyway, ON TO THE PICKS!  You can pick up your bars of gold on Tuesday.

  •  Denver -3.5 over Cincy
Manning improves every week and the John Fox defense is starting to hit its stride

  • Baltimore -3.5 over BROWNS
They unleash Ray Rice this week.


  • AZ + 11 over GB
I don't fucking know. they haven't covered a +10 spread yet. Maybe this is it, maybe not.

  • Chicago -3.5 over TITANS
CJ2k has the most yeards in the NFL since Week 3 (597) but only to scores vs dreadful Buffalo and the bears make good teams one dimensional so they will take him away, hasselback going to have to throw 40+ times I think they'l grab two of those


  • Indy +2 over Miami
fins playing well but i like the way the colts play at home and i like Arenas play calling he might be an nfl coach after all

  • Carolina +3.5 over RGIII
lil upset special, think cam out plays RGIII he has some motivation here and is physically more capable of rushing the ball down the skins throat and wants to prove it


  • JAX +4 over Detroit
Lions win by a FG

  • HOUSTON -10 over Buffalo
too much once they get a 10 point lead they just run foster and play actionit's unstoppable
i dont think this team can play from behind though good thing buffalo poses no threat to be in the lead


  • OAK -1.5 over Bucs
Raiders finding themselves a bit with this coach.


  • SEA -5 over Minny
Just too tough of a place to play. They beat everyone here, even when they are bad they beat teams here. Now they are actually pretty good.

sidenote - does any coach celebrate a TD or big play better than Pete Carroll he is like a damn cheerleader with headphones on that sideline


  • Dallas +4 over ATLANTA
pop champagne 72 fins


  • SAINTS -3 over Iggles

Thursday, November 01, 2012

Hurricanes suck!

Glad to see that LP and Aitch made it through the hurricane with no issues and their dociles were intact. Hurricanes are no joke, I have more hurricane experience than I care to (Gloria, Georges, Katrina, Ike, and Rita).

Move! /keef

No! /jug

Katrina was the worst I've seen. I was in New Orleans a week after the storm with my Air National Guard unit. We arrived just as they were taking the last people out of the convention center, which is where we stayed (I didn't poop on the floor). Three months after that I was in Biloxi, MS with my church to help work on houses. Katrina picked up casino barges and moved them over a half mile down the road. The houses we worked on had the first floor completely flooded to the ceiling. Its crazy the damage those storms can do. I should post pics some day.

The Rockets feel good about Harden. The Lakers don't feel so good about...well, basketball.

NHL is still locked out.

I always have some ideas on what to post throughout the week, and then Thursday morning hits and I forget them all. Time to work...GO!





Top Of The Page Material:

"Idiots with nothing better to do"





"Most Boston sports fans are just douchebags. Because most people from New England are douchebags." - tem





"Obama got elected because of the Rooney rule" - Jug





"you should never let debt stop you from pro-creating anyway" - El Padrino





"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H





"i'm dumb and sensitive. basically i'm a woman" - L Padrino





"I'm so horny this morning. If there wasn't this sex offender list going around id grope bitches on the train this morning" - L Padrino