Friday, October 26, 2012

El Pad's Picks How's ya face

CHICAGO -6.5 over Carolina
Prepare yourselves for another solemn Cammy Cam Cam press conference.  Chin up young man.  Ron Rivera is toast.

San Diego -2.5 over CLEVELAND
Chargers are going to wipe the floor with the Browns.  Too much.  Even Norv can't fuck this one up.  Shurmur is toast too.

DETROIT -1.5 over Seattle
Seattle has the #1 defence (British) apparentely.  Still think the Lions grab this one because they are home and they are desperate.

GREEN BAY -15.5 over Jax
Remember I said once this line couldn't be higher enough I'd take it at 21.  I lost that bet.  50/50

Indy +3.5 over TITANS
Luck is pretty good I have to admit.  I guess the hype was worth it. 

Pats -7 over RaMs
If this game were actually in Da' Loo and not in foggy Londontown I'd take the points.  But Brady sort of embodies everything we hate about the british.  So they will love him.

JETS -2 over Miami
TEEEBOOOWW impacts the game this week and not on a fake punt.

Atlanta +2 over PHILLY
Too much disarray in Andy Reid's belly right now. 

Skins +4.5 over STEELERS
The legend of RG III continues.  This old ass defense ain't going to be able to keep up with him.  Unless Dick LeBeau tricks his ass he'll tear these fools up.

KC -1 over Oakland
Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman! 

DALLAS +1.5 over Giants
Giants lose two games to a division rival every year.  Last year it was the Skins.  This year it's the Cowboys for some stupid reason.

New Orleans +6 over DENVER
Give me those points. 

ARIZONA +6.5 over San Fran
Something about a home dog on a Monday nighter.  Maybe they'll wear some third color alternate jersey like the collitch kids.



277 comments:

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Mize said...

If I still cared to do weekly picks, I like

Cleveland over the Flying Norvs

Indy to blow the doors off the Tits(Luck be chuckin' it up dere dog)

Pats to put the Rams in the blender

Dolphins because they're my closet team this year along with Tampa

Mize said...

"But Brady sort of embodies everything we hate about the british. So they will love him."


The Brits LOOOOVE the Pats. I was a pseudo celebrity wearing my Moss jersey in Vegas for the Hatton/Mayweather fight. It was grate.

Mize said...

"GREEN BAY -15.5 over Jax
Remember I said once this line couldn't be higher enough I'd take it at 21. I lost that bet. 50/50"


Whatta trust Randall Cobb, James Jones, and Donald Driver this week?

Mize said...

There's a chance I might even get to play some tailback for the Packers this season.

Mize said...

I think Tem's one of the wideouts on the practice team. Can't confirm that, though. Can't deny it either.

Mize said...

I hope the Lions lose 10-7. Big day for Seattle's D, 6 catches/82yds/TD for Pettigrew.

Mize said...

Aaaalll that she wants

Is another baby

Jugdish said...

Too much disarray in Andy Reid's belly right now.


funny

Jugdish said...

hungry

El Padrino said...

"Whatta trust Randall Cobb, James Jones, and Donald Driver this week?"

i trust Rodgers

the sam way i trust eli
ramses barden what?

and No MJD

El Padrino said...

"The Brits LOOOOVE the Pats"

i know right

it's like they think they are long lost cousins or something

you'd think they'd hate us you knwo from all that Revolution nonsense 250 some years ago

Mize said...

"i trust Rodgers"

Yeesh. Tell that to the worst fans in the NFL.

BLUE said...

or maybe they're the best fans in the NFL

Mize said...

Packers fans are getting ready to turn on Rodgers. They've stopped blaming the line for giving up sacks and are now suddenly saying Rodgers is holding the ball too long, and should just throw it away more. That sure wasn't their tune when he was out there running for 50 yards a game and getting clobbered all the time. The fans loooved that shit.

Mize said...

Packers fans are the St Louis Cardinals fans of the NFL

El Padrino said...

jesus meiz slow down

El Padrino said...

Tyrann Mathieu's chances of returning to LSU's football team took a serious hit Thursday when the 2011 Heisman Trophy finalist and three other former Tigers players were arrested on drug-related charges.

El Padrino said...

an Angel brought us tacos

was my favorite tweet of the night

El Padrino said...

american horror stories

getting mad pub this good too?

so much good shit out there

i still have to watch shows that are over completely

El Padrino said...

randomness

anytime The Fugitive is on I watch it, it's just an awesome movie

Aitch said...

I concur

El Padrino said...

i think it's tommy lee jones that gets me

El Padrino said...

"The most popular drink on National Basketball Association flights, according to Delta: Snapple Kiwi-Strawberry juice drink."


ha, surprised it's not grape sodas

BLUE said...

NBA teams don't fly private charters?

i find that hard to beleive.

who the fuck is flying Delta...the Hawks?

BLUE said...

windows 8 bitches

El Padrino said...

airline companies convert the planes to charter planes for professional teams

half do this

El Padrino said...

delta article

El Padrino said...

"According to a release, "Manning, in partnership with Papa John's, will own 21 restaurants in the Denver area."

El Padrino said...

Peyton.

Jugdish said...

that's where the 2 million free pizzas are coming from

BLUE said...

probably will be his wife that owns them

BLUE said...

peyton knows good pizza

he's changing the name to Peyton Johns

BLUE said...

is papa john's a franchise?

I would think so

El Padrino said...

yes

Jugdish said...

probably will be his wife that owns them



no, she'll be cooking

/Lp

Mize said...

Awesome. My scheduling folder for Outlook is broken again. We have the worst technology systems and network.

Jugdish said...

reboot

Mize said...

"reboot"

HA!

Jugdish said...

try this

Keef said...

Tyrann Mathieu's chances of returning to LSU's football team took a serious hit Thursday when the 2011 Heisman Trophy finalist and three other former Tigers players were arrested on drug-related charges.




You don't say?

Keef said...

Awesome. My scheduling folder for Outlook is broken again. We have the worst technology systems and network.



We don't even fucking use Outlook

El Padrino said...

whatta got lotus notes

Mize said...

I'd like Outlook a whole lot more if our network and server connections weren't always going down. It sucks balls.

Keef said...

whatta got lotus notes



si

Keef said...

how big of an attention whore is Stern? basically doing a 15 month victory lap

El Padrino said...

that is the way it's done in the business world

Keef said...

wall

BLUE said...

i'm announcing that i'm going to retire in September of 2041

BLUE said...

although I may be extended until December of 2043, i have yet to decide

Jugdish said...

good job, blue!

BLUE said...

one of my friends is in New Orleans this weekend.

he's at Bubba Gump and all excited..
dude, they have one of those in downtown Denver.

why the hell is that the first place you go?

Jugdish said...

6.50 chicken sando special?

BLUE said...

"Cuz they have the best shrimp on the planet"


um yeah, ok/

Keef said...

6.50 chicken sando special?



I can't justify spending that on a sandwich

/mize

kod said...

"you'd think they'd hate us you knwo from all that Revolution nonsense 250 some years ago"



well, saving them (and the world) in WWII probably went a long way with them

BLUE said...

ah the brits don't care about that

BLUE said...

they just like Tom Brady's uggs

Keef said...

well, saving them (and the world) in WWII probably went a long way with them




I'm still bitter about that

/blitler

kod said...

"ah the brits don't care about that"


ah, they're more impressed with how we saved them in WWI?


Cause we did that too

kod said...

but, then again France


bailed them out in WWI, WWII, Vietnam and Korea


you'd think they'd hate us less

Keef said...

There you go with the "us" talk again


(S)

Mize said...

"bailed them out in WWI, WWII, Vietnam and Korea


you'd think they'd hate us less"


You play for the military now?

/Keith

effed by a panda dick said...

when i was in england mostly the brits would ask me about our presidential race or tell me reasons why britain was better than the US.

effed by a panda dick said...

they have a slight inferiority complex.

effed by a panda dick said...

we drug them into Iraq and Afghanistan, so they hate us a little bit again.

kod said...

"You play for the military now?

/Keith"


-ha, nah, just trying to impress Jeth

kod said...

"we drug them into Iraq and Afghanistan, so they hate us a little bit again."


good point; I'd be pissed about that

effed by a panda dick said...

i have a captain america t-shirt, so i can say us.

El Padrino said...

yeah otherwise they would just sit on their hands while islamic extrmeists blew up their tube system and blow up markets

BLUE said...

this is a chicken/egg argument

effed by a panda dick said...

they might do that.

effed by a panda dick said...

i can't be held responsible for what you think they'd do.

Jugdish said...

kod, thoughts?

Jugdish said...

mize, thoughts?



s

Keef said...

yeah otherwise they would just sit on their hands while islamic extrmeists blew up their tube system and blow up markets




::nodding::

/NYC

El Padrino said...

"What makes someone a New Yorker?

Someone who complains about noise, weather, limited space, being around people ... and wouldn't live anywhere else."

guess that's me

BLUE said...

you live in brooklyn

BLUE said...

on long island

El Padrino said...

yeah thats a new yorker it's one of the 5 boroughs that make up NYC

Jugdish said...

yeah thats a new yorker it's one of the 5 boroughs that make up NYC



and according to the quote you posted...filled with complainers.

Keef said...

yeah thats a new yorker it's one of the 5 boroughs that make up NYC



And all the shitty teams are moving there.

FACE!

BLUE said...

so on your address it says Brooklyn, right?


so you don't live in NYC

Keef said...

He said New Yorker

BLUE said...

oh, so the state

Jugdish said...

so you don't live in NYC



::BITCHSCREAM::

/Lp

BLUE said...

"The five boroughs—The Bronx, Brooklyn, Manhattan, Queens, and Staten Island—were consolidated into a single city in 1898"


blessed be

BLUE said...

i sit corrected

BLUE said...

what year did they annex East Rutherford, NJ?

El Padrino said...

"so you don't live in NYC"

is this bait?

BLUE said...

was going to be bait

El Padrino said...

i'm not going to take it

if you dont mind

El Padrino said...

frankenstorm has cancelled my weekend plans to AC

now el pad is mad

Keef said...

haha

effed by a panda dick said...

1996

effed by a panda dick said...

frankenstorm is a rain shower.

pussy.

Keef said...

You know how New Yorkers are

El Padrino said...

'Worst Storm in 100 Years'...


LIES!

effed by a panda dick said...

i know how the media is. they are blowing this shit out of proportion.

effed by a panda dick said...

then some old people will die because they are old and they will blame it on the storm.

El Padrino said...

wasnt my call

seems to me it's more of a concern being in south jersey when whatever it is happens not so much back home

El Padrino said...

"You know how New Yorkers are"

tough sob's

BLUE said...

"wasnt my call"

cmlp said NO

BLUE said...

""You know how New Yorkers are""

they are like Texans


everything's bigger

El Padrino said...

"cmlp said NO"

not hers either

Keef said...

tough sob's




um,sure

Keef said...

That's why they're freaking out about rain

Jugdish said...

Lp, have you ever been through a hurricane?

ns

Keef said...

Summertime: OMG it's 90 degrees. It's a natural distaster

Fall: OMG it's going to rain. It's a natural disaster

Winter: OMG, we're getting 6" of snow. It's a natural disaster

El Padrino said...

"Lp, have you ever been through a hurricane?

ns"


no, we had that Irene situation last year that shut down the subway and flooded low lying areas but that wasnt a hurricane

El Padrino said...

i dont know what keef is saying

he is dropping mad bait up in here

effed by a panda dick said...

i have never been through a hurricane.

El Padrino said...

that's media talk keef

we keep it mooooovinn no matter what the weather does

as long as public transportation is up and humming we go

Jugdish said...

the general consensus is the media overreacts to those storms, but you just don't know where they are going to hit directly. if a real hurricane ever hit you directly, you wouldn't think the media is overreacting

El Padrino said...

hold that i guess it was a hurricane

still, dont recall chilling in the bathtub or anything like that

was a pretty normal day as I recall, some trees came down and fucked up some cars

El Padrino said...

if a real hurricane ever hit you directly

yeah i guess until this happens i'll continue to have a non-chalant attitude about it

El Padrino said...

it's like rape

funny until it happens to you

s

Jugdish said...

that's probably a good idea

Keef said...

that's media talk keef



The media didn't tell me you canceled your AC trip. You told me.

El Padrino said...

i will give you 1 million dollars keef, i million, if you let me dip my balls in your mouth

Jugdish said...

The media didn't tell me you canceled your AC trip. You told me.



no the media had that story, it was at www.wussbag.com/news

Jugdish said...

he cancelled the AC trip so he could go surfing...storm my ass!

Keef said...

i will give you 1 million dollars keef, i million, if you let me dip my balls in your mouth



How are you going to get them back from cmlp?

Mize said...

I heard LP was going to Vegas next month, so he cancelled a trip to Ratlantic City

Keef said...

0%

Keef said...

"It's looking like a very serious storm that could be historic," said Jeff Masters, meteorology director of the forecasting service Weather Underground. "Mother Nature is not saying, `Trick or treat.' It's just going to give tricks."




Stuuuuuuuupid

El Padrino said...

"How are you going to get them back from cmlp?"

cmk is mailing them back actually

frozen

Keef said...

Oh, that's what those were. I thought she bought a BB gun

Keef said...

that nanny story makes me sick

El Padrino said...

me too

my only sliver of hope is someone else did it and made it look like she attempted suicide

BLUE said...

that's still not very awesome

Keef said...

yeah that is still shitty

El Padrino said...

right

effed by a panda dick said...

you guys read too much news.

effed by a panda dick said...

if you are prepared for everything then you never get to practice or hone your improv skills. you never learn to think quickly.

being ignorant excercises your mind by forcing you to make decisions that you would have otherwise been prepared for.

thinking on your feet, making decisions, these are skills that enable you to survive.

preparing for a possible rainstorm is for people that are too dumb to react in an intelligent manner.

BLUE said...

New Yorkers

Mize said...

"mize, thoughts?"


Fuck Josh Hamilton

Jugdish said...

Lp hacked tem's account

kod said...

ah, what a beautiful day to refinance the mortgage.

6.1% interest dropped to 2.5%, and the sucker will be paid off in less than 8 years

BOOM, plus, today I am officially a homeowner, and not just married to one

BLUE said...

yeah, we're going to refi probably in the next few months, should knock about $700 off my mortgage...or i can go with a 15 yr mortgage and keep paying the same

kod said...

"we're going to refi probably in the next few months, should knock about $700 off my mortgage...or i can go with a 15 yr mortgage and keep paying the same"


right on, wow, $700....in savings?....man, I've never seen it, but you must have a hellova nice house there Blue! I'm of the short term pain for long term gain mindset (why I chose a 10 year student loan repayment plan and why I'm grateful for my father in law for finding this steal and helping cmkod line it up).

Jugdish said...

F-22 just did a few fly bys...USA! USA! USA!

Keef said...

I was thinking about refi. I'm just worried that the value of our house has dropped too much

kod said...

"kod, thoughts?"


I could do a 10 scroller on last night's game, but will keep it directed to the column linked.

I think the problem was much more with the OC/playcalling and lack of quality WRs than with Ponder. Also, do these same people really think Webb would have done any better last night? Ha!

I'm not sold on Ponder by any means, but we have absolutely awful WRs, a terrible OC, and a O-line that appears to be much better at run blocking than pass protection

kod said...

also, big props to TBs kicking game last night, ns

the Vikes really seem to feed off of kickoff and punt returns, especially at home....I think Percy only could return 1 kick, and Sherill's ony good return was nullified by penalty. This is a killer return team, they completely took that away, and that caused a lot of problems for Minni

kod said...

"if you are prepared for everything then you never get to practice or hone your improv skills. you never learn to think quickly."

a) You can't prepare for everything, even if you wanted to. There wil always be opportunities to practice the improv skills.

b) as Denny Green once said, "plan the work, and work the plan"

c) the key IMO is to plan for shit without worrying about shit, at least, as little as possible



Mize said...

"and a O-line that appears to be much better at run blocking than pass protection"


Man, Tampa was ALL up in Ponder's ass on the pass rush last night.

kod said...

for sure, most teams have been this year


I think I heard that Tampa hadn't had a sack in like 3 weeks either


that gives me some fear about Seattle, although I think the rested purple will take them out

kod said...

shit, Cook's been placed on IR as well


that's a big loss, not Woodson big, but pretty big for Vikes D



Keef said...

The Vikings & Packers should die of gonorrhea and rot in hell

Mize said...

Packers fans are turning on Woodson, along with Rodgers.

Keef said...

It's cool that LOV has a Packers fan spokesman

Keef said...

2 weeks from right now H will be alone in Vegas

kod said...

I don't really get the Vikes hate


3-13 last year, waaay under .500 over the past decade, 0 superbowl wins in franchise history, 0 superbowl appearances in 35 years, far less insufferable fan base than GB and CHI (much more so than Detroit, but they are probably the least insufferable of all)

Favre?


Keef said...

The 2 people in the world I probably despise the most are Packer & Viking fans

Keef said...

So when they lose, I win

kod said...

"So when they lose, I win"



you're a lucky guy

Keef said...

we'll find out in 2 weeks

Aitch said...

"F-22 just did a few fly bys...USA! USA! USA!"

Glad the pilot didn't pass out.

Aitch said...

"2 weeks from right now H will be alone in Vegas"

Not true. My friend Kristen and her man will be there.

Mize said...

"The 2 people in the world I probably despise the most are Packer & Viking fans"

I like Vikings fans. I was one of those for a while. And I still break out the manual Skol Horn whenever I can. I do a pretty spot on job with it.

kod said...

right on, we're a pretty good lot, almost everyone is nice to opposing team fans at the dome or local bar/restaurants, except maybe some Packer fans.

Keef said...

Not true. My friend Kristen and her man will be there.



Maybe tem will want to fight them

Aitch said...

You just stated he won't be there yet.

Aitch said...

Read a book bro

/LP

Keef said...

So they are leaving before tem gets there?

Mize said...

Deluxe really is a goddamn retard and doesn't understand how baseball works.

Mize said...

This motherfucker thinks the Brewers could take a shot at James Shields this offseason, who has a 9 MILLION DOLLAR club option. The Rays would never not pick that option up.

Mize said...

And he's been too pussy to open a BCB account because his hair-brained ideas would get shredded.

Mize said...

This dude thinks the Brewers should sign Mike fucking Adams and 34 year old Juan Pierre to be the "4th outfielder". Fucking DUMB.

Mize said...

I hope this mufugger reads this

Mize said...

I'm drinking. I think I'm gonna play some Arkham City

Keef said...

I thought it was hilarity when he said something to the effect of the Breer's should only sign Greinke if he puts up good results

Mize said...

He's really not in tune at all with the economics of sports. Well, economics in general.

Keef said...

No, he's got it. All teams should only sign players who have good results

Mize said...

Gold

Mize said...

I think the Aveo's gonna get an K&N air filter pretty soon.

Keef said...

I didn't know Yakov Smirnov was still relevant

Mize said...

I'm drunk

Keef said...

Ready to advance

kod said...

"I didn't know Yakov Smirnov was still relevant"



don't you watch Night Court? That show will forever be relevant, shoot, that and Fear and Loathing brought me to where I am today (ns)

kod said...

of course, I still get teased today, as once in college, I apparently started screaming in my sleep "Night Court is the greatest show ever"


wish I could have remembered what that dream was about


effed by a panda dick said...

It was probably about Night Court.

kod said...

maybe, but I was lying


I really think it's like the #3rd best show ever made

Simpsons, Seinfeld >>>>>>>>>>

Keef said...

Night Court was the best. Not sure what an 80s show has to do with Yakov being relevant today

Keef said...

And I know Yakov was on Night Court. It's just not what I think of when I think about NC

Keef said...

Amazon gonna start adding sales tax in AZ. Booooo

kod said...

"It's just not what I think of when I think about NC"


Me neither, but NC is what I think about when I hear of Yakov



Mize said...

I think of Perfect Strangers when I hear Yakov Smirnov. He guest starred on an episode, and for some reason it sticks out in my memory. He was one of Balki's relatives or something. I could be wrong.

kod said...

"Night Court was the best. Not sure what an 80s show has to do with Yakov being relevant today"


this suprises me (ns). Let me use a sports analogy, David Tyree. When you think of football, he probably doesn't come immediately to mind (nor if you think of just the NFL, or probably for many even when thinking about NYG football history...especially if we're talking 30-40 years from now).

Yet, when his name comes up, even decades from now, many people will remember him for that catch.
so, instead of ::blank stare::....you have, insane NYG SB win! (and for many with Yakov, he will get a NC!! and not a ::blank stre::

That's what makes him relevant, the lack of ::blank stares::. Doesn't matter that he's not the embodiment, that's not required for continued relevancy.

kod said...

I think of Perfect Strangers when I hear Yakov Smirnov. He guest starred on an episode,


YES! Nice call; I hadn't thought of that guest appearance in ages, twas great....I may look that episode up today or tomorrow

Keef said...

Marcus Lattimore snapped his leg or something

kod said...

wow, Gophers; maybe NELSON! just needed that game against Sconnie to figure some things out

1st half: 15-17, 246 yds 3 TDS (0 turnovers, 34-7 Minni). Not bad for the true freshman; against my least favorite team to boot

Keef said...

Rich Rod's antics on the sideline are the best

Mize said...

"wow, Gophers; maybe NELSON! just needed that game against Sconnie to figure some things out"


You will stop blaspheming the name of NELSON! or else.

Keef said...

Damn, cmk's grandma died this morning

kod said...

man, sorry Keith

kod said...

"You will stop blaspheming the name of NELSON! or else."



you can go fuck yourself, not NELSON!

kod said...

I use it now in my email sig



(s, for now)

kod said...

aja Meiz, I'll make you a deal


if, the Gophers fail to make a bowl this year, I will permanently retire it


however, if the Gophers make ANY bowl, I will continue running it into the ground for every Nelson I know and like

Mize said...

KOD, how might I use Yarrow to help with my ears and the built up pressure? Amoxicillin & prescribed nasal spray are not working. Do I buy it at Walgreens or something? In what form? What kind of application? I need help, my brother.

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