Friday, September 28, 2012

El Padrino's Picks Week Four

Overall 20-26 but charging.  And the refs are back, wonder how long this honeymoon will last.

New England -4 over BUFFALO
The Pats are 7-1 ATS vs the Bills in the past 8 games. The 1?  Their trip to Orchard Park a year ago Wednesday.  Prior to that they beat the Bills 8 straight times.  I don't think the Patriots will lose three games in a row.  Wonder when is the last time the Pats lost three in a row?  Shit if Mark Sanchez and Weeden can light up the Bills secondary what is Brady going to do with his 50 pass attempts?

Carolina +7 over ATLANTA
Cam hasn't beaten Matt Ryan yet.  After Sunday, he still won't have a win against Matt Ryan.  I have drastically underestimated the Falcons defense thus far so despite the strong start from Matt Ryan it's really been their defense that has impressed.  I think the Falcons win but am calling a garbage TD late for the infamous back door cover.

HOUSTON -12 over Tennessee
Schaub's deformed ear can rush for more yard than Chris fucking Johnson.  If he, by some fucking miracle of Jesus, bursts out this week with big numbers I will fucking lose it.  I'm benching him this week and never want to look back.  It's like when you sell a stock.  Never watch the stock after you sell it.  Will only cause stress.  And stress kills. KIK.

San Diego +1 over CHEIFS
The Cheifs suck.  Crennel fooled them.  Norv has been fooling Dean Spanos and Co. for YEARS.  This is the battle of the two guys who won't be NFL coaches after this season.  Chargers can't play any worse than they did last week and Saints gave away the game yet still had a chance to win late. 

Minnesota +4.5 over DETROIT
Vikings played very well last week and I will really impressed with Ponder.  Made some really good decisions under duress.  Also not quite sure about Stafford holding up the whole game.

ST. LOUIS +2.5 over Seattle
Nice little home dog here.  Seattle sucks ass on the road.

Niners -4 over JETS
Heard a Rex Ryan spot on the radio begging the fans to show up Sunday and root hard.  Starting to hate that guy.  Anyway I think the Niners got punched in the mouth last week and it hurt.  I think they'll do the punching this week.  Sanchez/Shonn Greene <<<<<<<<<<< Ponder/All Day.

BRONCOS -6.5 over Raiders
This goes against all kinds of logic.  Just playing a hunch here.  Denver has a terrible ATS records against both the Raiders and against teams with losing records.  Road team is 7-1 ATS, overall Denver is 8-24-1 against teams with a losing record and overall Denver has been pitiful ATS.  Like I said.  Just a hunch.

CARDINALS -6 over Dolphins
So they are for real. Well then they should beat the Dolphins rather easily.

Bengals -2.5 over JACKSONVILLE
Benjarvus Green Ellis fumbled last week.  Wonder if Alltel Stadium sells out this week with the marquee matchup they have.  Thinking of a word.  Ryhmes with Flackout.

Saints +7.5 over GREEN BAY
Man New Orleans is having a rough go without the former boy wonder coach Sean Payton.  Remind me again why they didn't give Spags the interim title, knowing full well Vitt would be suspended asswell?  Anyway Green Bay has not impressed thus far so 7.5 to a desperate team makes no sense to me.

Skins +3 over BUCS
Giants +2 over PHILLY
Bears +3.5 over DALLAS
It's the NFC East 3 team parlay! 

Back in the day I'd tease this combo.  Teasing is the act of taking points and adding them to the spread.  So a three team teaser allows you to add 10 points to each number and since they are all getting points it would look like this - Skins +13, Giants +12, Bears +13.5.  How do you feel about that.  Now the trick is the VIG is higher and you have to win all three.  With a parlay you get more bang for your buck, especially if you think all these teams will win forego the spreads and bet the moneyline.  They have to win but the odds are nice if you hit.  I love gambling.

151 comments:

Jugdish said...

Nice job on spacing.

Mize said...

I'm in a shitty mood this morning regarding work, looking for a reason to get cheered up. Katy Perry comes on the radio. I love me some Katy Perry. No dice. The Police come on with King Of Pain, and THAT shit helps. Life is fucking weird, man.

Jugdish said...

wall

tem said...

country music would cheer you up.

Beth said...

"looking for a reason to get cheered up"

TGIF!!!!!

(s)

Mize said...

Why come people in the souf cain't read good?

Mize said...

Just an observation from work

Keef said...

Mize should go to the Ryder Cup this weekend

Beth said...

Why can't people in the North type good?

Beth said...

US down early in all 4 Ryder Cup matches, but still pretty early in all 4.

Mize said...

"Mize should go to the Ryder Cup this weekend"

Crazy expensive. 2020, bro. Whistling Straits.

Going to Appleton this weekend.

I miss Him said...

OKTOBERFEST

I miss Him said...

iphone5 is wicked fast...on a related note, it is also awesome

Mize said...

"THC traded C.J. Spiller, Buf RB to HUEB
THC traded Mark Ingram, NO RB to HUEB
HUEB traded Rashard Mendenhall, Pit RB to THC
HUEB traded Victor Cruz, NYG WR to THC"


Jesus christ. What a farce.

Mize said...

My buddy EJ continues to rip people the fuck off. Guy's a used car salesman.

kod said...

"country music would cheer you up."


skod has gone country; going so far that she's now rocking a F-150 FX4


how could someone who shares so much of the same DNA ride around in a huge pickup rocking out to Red Solo Cup, yikes

I miss Him said...

wonder what he could get your for the aveo

El Padrino said...

appleton rum is good

El Padrino said...

supposed to be off today new big bossman tolt me to work from home

faggot

I miss Him said...

"supposed to be off today new big bossman tolt me to work from home"

frenchies never make you work from home

kod said...

"After Brady and Manning are the likes of Steve Young and John Elway, but just behind them is a surprising candidate: Matt Ryan. Like Flacco, Ryan had a reputation as the guy who handed the ball off to a successful running game during his rookie season, but he appears to have grown into a more complete quarterback than Flacco by now, playoff performance (and win totals) aside. Ryan's won a bunch more games than you might think. In 61 starts (excluding a three-pass outing against the Bucs), Ryan has won 42 games. An average passer with Ryan's same points allowed would have won just 33.3 games, giving Ryan a difference of 8.7 wins, or 2.3 wins above expectation per 16 games."


there ya go Beth; you're qb may be elite after all

I dunno though, he was a sprained ankle on my otherwise stellar ffball squad last season

tem said...

new bossman gave you that handshake agreement.

Mize said...

"wonder what he could get your for the aveo"


Aveo is worth over twice what I owe on it. Couldn't be happier with the car.

I miss Him said...

he was awful last year

tem said...

if you owed $0 you'd be happier /as.

I miss Him said...

or if it were worth quadruple what you owed

tem said...

from some beer thing on yahoo!
"This South American favorite is centered around Brazilian culture. Jennifer Lopez promotes the product for them. AB InBev (yes, the same people who make Budweiser) brewed 17.4 million barrels of it in 2011, up from 18 million in 2010."



knows math.

Keef said...

A city shepherd uses 30 sheep to “mow” the parks of Curitiba, Brazil.

Beth said...

"there ya go Beth; you're qb may be elite after all"

He was good but not great his 1st 3 years, but if he keeps it up this season like he's been in the first 3 games I'd call him elite.

Beth said...

""there ya go Beth; you're qb may be elite after all"

Oh and just to give you grief:

*your

tem said...

what's jug think about it?

I miss Him said...

jug likes stafford

Jugdish said...

No

El Padrino said...

"He was good but not great his 1st 3 years, but if he keeps it up this season like he's been in the first 3 games I'd call him elite."


Giants 24
Falcons 2

Beth said...

Oh the whole Falcons team sucked in that game EP, no denying that.

No matter how good Ryan and the Falcons are this regular season, it all means squat til they win a playoff game. And the team very much knows that.

kod said...

"Oh and just to give you grief:

*your"


SAS that didn't come from our resident grammar police officer

kod said...

"He was good but not great his 1st 3 years, but if he keeps it up this season like he's been in the first 3 games I'd call him elite."


getting killed now by both Julio and Ryan this season, after having them do squat for me last year has been the most painful part of the football season so far


on a positive note, it's been an overall awesome first 3 weeks NFLwise in my book

I miss Him said...

"on a positive note, it's been an overall awesome first 3 weeks NFLwise in my book"

kod is on tem's side about the replacement refs

Keef said...

mize, sconnie plays here next year. Just sayin

Mize said...

"mize, sconnie plays here next year. Just sayin"


Yes, and the Devils win in dramatic fashion with 3 seconds left, after giving up a 13 point halftime lead to the Badgers and their newfangled spread offense.

kod said...

"kod is on tem's side about the replacement refs"



yes, that and Ponder. Ponder has been the main reason I don't care too much about sitting at 1-5 fantasy-wise.

Too early to tell for sure, but this is the most promising a Viking qb has looked since the Dante era

kod said...

"mize, sconnie plays here next year. Just sayin"


You should go Meiz, I'd tag along




Keef said...

You should go Meiz, I'd tag along


suite

Mize said...

Summit 4: Gilbert/PHX

Mize said...

Arizona in August sounds just like the kind of place for 2 pasty white people from the great north to visit.

(._. )

Keef said...

They play on 9/14

tem said...

if it is summit 4 i'm going, you can't get rid of me. so it would be 3 pasty white people.

Mize said...

"They play on 9/14"

It's September, bro.

Mize said...

El PAD: You have FIFTY WEEKS ADVANCE NOTICE. READ A BOOK, BRAH.

tem said...

we staying a keith's house?

Keef said...

That would be hilarity to have everyone stay here after I wouldn't let LP stay at my place for the Super Bowl

Keef said...

That being said....


No!

/cmk

kod said...

wow, I looked up Floyd of Rosedale on Wiki to help make a facebook pun


fuck the pun though, that's one crazy backstory. Overt racism, intentional injury, governors threatening mob violence against college football players, Attorney General intervention, criminal warrants placed for gambling over a pig


I'm surprised this is the first I've heard of it, if I was announcing IA/Minni I'd sure as shit discuss it


tem said...

Floyd of Rosedale


::blank stare::

Keef said...

trophy for Iowa/Gophers winner. Or something like that

Mize said...

You'll never guess who is literally the only person in the building today that didn't get Jimmy John's bought for lunch.

Keef said...

woe

tem said...

special case?

tem said...

maybe they'll get something better

Mize said...

The only thing better is lobster

Mize said...

I better be getting lobster, dammit.

Mize said...

I'm gonna go to the bathroom and cut myself for a while.

Keef said...

Gotta get some A-1 for my lobster

/mize

Keef said...

Tiger is so awesome in Ryder Cup matches

Mize said...

Getting his ass kicked?

tem said...

ounce of hotsauce

Keef said...

he lost

Keef said...

Him & Stricker suck

kod said...

...CBS college sports has announced it's upcoming televised college hockey schedule....

"Like most of the country, CBS loves itself some Notre Dame. The Irish will end up making six appearances on the channel. Michigan will also be seen a whole lot, making four appearances.

So, essentially, CBS has come to the conclusion that sports fans aren’t already tired of seeing every single Notre Dame and Michigan football game on television, and that they absolutely NEED to see more of America’s two favorite teams on the hockey rink, too. Makes perfect sense."


looks like our local sports guy is a wee bit bitter that BSU didn't get any national games

tem said...

nap time

Keef said...

My guess that probably < than 50people outside of Minnesota have even heard of Benji State

kod said...

"My guess that probably < than 50people outside of Minnesota have even heard of Benji State"


probably true; my guess is that less than 50% of people living in the Twin Cities Metro area have heard of Benji, or Benji state

Keef said...

racism

kod said...

I grew up in that metro area, and I know the perception.....



St. Cloud is Northern Minnesota, Brainerd is right on the Canadian border, and aside from Duluth and Moorehead, there are no other cities in Minnesota north of Brainerd

kod said...

except Roseau, because they invented Snowmobiles and are really really good at hockey for such a small town

Mize said...

"My guess that probably < than 50people outside of Minnesota have even heard of Benji State"


Stop it. Benji State hockey >>>>

Also, curling.

tem said...

i thought it had more letters

Keef said...

Stop it. Benji State hockey >>>>


If you say so

Mize said...

"there are no other cities in Minnesota north of Brainerd"


Lake Of The Woods, broski.

Keef said...

Lake Of The Woods, broski.



Perception, broski. Not reality, broski.

Mize said...

I guess LOTW could be Roseau

Mize said...

"Perception, broski. Not reality, broski."

Okay, Mr <50 people.

Keef said...

Your* right. Probably < 30

Mize said...

LP must've gotten fired for going into the office today.

Keef said...

Oregano's for lunch today

tem said...

LP is in kiss ass mode with new boss. he has to be. new big boss gets his ass kissed for at least a month.

tem said...

or LP got fired. sorry.

if the big boss tells you to work from home on a friday it isn't usually good. it means they are cleaning out your office for you.

i truly hope that isn't the case.

kod said...

"Also, curling."


BSU hockey was DII when I grew up, and Bemidji hadn't yet made their mark on the curling scene


but that's a good point Meiz, it's probably becoming a bit more known


-also, Obama's dog, Santorum sweater vests;

Bemidji does seem to pop up quite a bit relatively speaking, usually in strange and unexpected ways

kod said...

"Perception, broski. Not reality, broski."


^^^^^^^^^


Many here still believe this to be in Canada

kod said...

"If you say so"



well, we have made the Frozen Four more recently than most major DI Programs; also, BSU grad Matt Read made a heckova case for rookie of the year for the Flyers last season, go aks your Rev


kod said...

"if the big boss tells you to work from home on a friday it isn't usually good. it means they are cleaning out your office for you.

i truly hope that isn't the case."



-that thought occurred to me as well, I too hope that isn't the case

-stressful to get a new big boss

tem said...

what's hockey?

Keef said...

we. HA!

kod said...

CoL


my taxes support the team, I use "we"



case closed

tem said...

"stressful to get a new big boss"

^

i hope all is well in NYC for LP

Keef said...

my taxes support the team, I use "we"



case closed



No, I understand. I know you've said that before. I still laugh

Mize said...

"if the big boss tells you to work from home on a friday it isn't usually good. it means they are cleaning out your office for you."


Never even crossed my mind. That would suck dick.

El Padrino said...

all is well im indispensable for the immediate future beyond that who the fuck knows with this business

just busy as fuck

Mize said...

"No, I understand. I know you've said that before. I still laugh"


What's it like to be an awful person?

I miss Him said...

"my taxes support the team, I use "we""

so that's your bridge too?

I miss Him said...

shit my taxes paid for bank of america with TARP funds....i'm "we"-ing the shit out of that place.

I miss Him said...

technically i'm EP's new bigboss's boss because my tax dollars bought wallstreet

Keef said...

What's it like to be an awful person?



I can't laugh?

I miss Him said...

make me a sandwich EP

Mize said...

Blue is being facetious.

El Padrino said...

i'll give you a sandwhich* Blue

tem said...

el pad will give him a cock sammich

Jugdish said...

What's it like to be an awful person?


Keef is sorry his confidence is so off putting

kod said...

"so that's your bridge too?"


I was going to make a comment about LOV constantly revolving around pointless semantics


and then I remembered what I do for a living

tem said...

ha

Mize said...

"I was going to make a comment about LOV constantly revolving around pointless semantics"


It tires me

kod said...

"shit my taxes paid for bank of america with TARP funds....i'm "we"-ing the shit out of that place."



eh, that's a loan; different deal

I miss Him said...

do athletic department boosters get to use "we"?

tem said...

yes

Mize said...

"do athletic department boosters get to use "we"?"


FUCK YES. You think T. Boone Pickens is out in these streets not saying "we"? I think not.

Mize said...

I'm out.

Spaceman Spiff said...

"Rasheed Wallace has informed the Knicks that he'll come out of retirement and will be in attendance on Monday when the team opens training camp"

El Padrino said...

oh fuck him

tem said...

is he on their roster??

Spaceman Spiff said...

about to sign him

Keef said...

It tires me



Woe fucking hoo

kod said...

[Rubio] said he could play his next NBA game by December, nine months after he tore two ligaments there. "I don't know, they say December, but it could be January," he said. "I don't want to say a time because I don't want to rush it. I want to be ready when I am ready."


careful Rubio, fair or not, you're going to be constantly compared to AP, and comments like this already make you appear lazy and soft

Keef said...

Well, he is from Spain

I miss Him said...

and a pussy

Keef said...

This just happened here today

Spaceman Spiff said...

"I don't have Ray's number anymore. I'm not trying to communicate with him," Garnett said Friday at the Boston Celtics 2012 media day"

I miss Him said...

he misses his musk

Spaceman Spiff said...

HILARITY

I miss Him said...

dork

Keef said...

wall

Keef said...

Oh look. Tiger lost again this afternoon. Fuck that guy.

Keef said...

USA! is up 5-2. Tiger is the 2.

Jugdish said...

Wall

Keef said...

Homer!

Aitch said...

"Wonder when is the last time the Pats lost three in a row?"

2001

Aitch said...

"I don't have Ray's number anymore. I'm not trying to communicate with him," Garnett said Friday at the Boston Celtics 2012 media day"

Pierce was a little more diplomatic, saying he was disappointed by Ray's decision and he won't be wishing him luck any time soon. Also pretty much stated Ray left because he didn't want to come of the bench behind Avery Bradley.

kod said...

ah, I see that Minni plays IA today for their B10 opener

Floyd of Rosedale talk was unintentionally timely






kod said...

"Iran's leading news agency published a mock poll that claimed rural whites in the U.S. favored Iranian leader Mahmoud Ahmadinejad over president Barack Obama.

The mock poll was originally published on a popular U.S. media site, The Onion.

The FARS news agency—which touts itself as Iran's leading independent news agency while others note its ties to government—published much of the made-up poll that first appeared in the U.S. parody website.

The Onion site quoted a fictitious Gallup Poll that noted "77 percent of rural Caucasian voters...would much rather go to a baseball game or have a beer with Ahmadinejad...than spend time with Obama."

FARS led its story with that statement and even quoted someone from the Onion piece, West Virginia resident Swiderski, saying of Ahmadinejad, "I like him better."

Oops."


chuckle, although I too thought the Onion was real for about 30 seconds when I first came across it Fall 97

Aitch said...

That's hysterical

Keef said...

wava's D is stout

tem said...

I thought the D played well. Baylor could have put up 354 today, but they held them to only 63.

tem said...

Aja, was at the game. It was exhausting to watch. It was like watching people play ncaa on the lowest difficulty level.

Keef said...

mize

kod said...

hooray for special teams

Mize said...

"hooray for special teams"


Suck a dick

kod said...

and


hooray for defense


now, if only the Vikes had some receivers, I'd be dreaming playoffs

Keef said...

fuck brandon lloyd

Mize said...

Brewers "fans" booed Mike Fiers as he came off the mound in the 6th today. I fucking hate people.

Mize said...

Reggie Bush or Mike Williams, guys? Need moar help!

Mize said...

Fuck the Lions

Keef said...

Looks like blue won with 3 restarts

Top Of The Page Material:

"Idiots with nothing better to do"





"Most Boston sports fans are just douchebags. Because most people from New England are douchebags." - tem





"Obama got elected because of the Rooney rule" - Jug





"you should never let debt stop you from pro-creating anyway" - El Padrino





"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H





"i'm dumb and sensitive. basically i'm a woman" - L Padrino





"I'm so horny this morning. If there wasn't this sex offender list going around id grope bitches on the train this morning" - L Padrino