Monday, August 13, 2012

Instead Of Running For President, Why Don't You Try Walking On A Treadmill?

Kinda watching the roast of Roseanne. No Roast will top Bob Saget's.

Man, Katey Sagal is all kinds of fine. Fuck you if you think otherwise. That bitch is hot.

Had a birthday party for my guy Woody's daughter on Sadderday. Always a good time. Had lots of fun. Last year I strained my ribs dancing, this year I might have put myself in line for some 42 year old tail. Well, as long as the one homie dumps her like he says he's gonna.

Wow. Jeff Ross kills every time he roasts somebody.

Oh, Paul Ryan. What a bad pick for your running mate, Mitt. Really. Bad choice. And then they had a rally tonight in Wisconsin. Why? Why would you have your little party in a state that you already have locked up? That makes no sense to me. Maybe somebody can enlighten me.

I have a really dark playlist for my iPod that I don't share with anybody. It's pretty much all about killing, death, and suicide. I've never told anybody about it before mainly because when I was truly and genuinely depressed every day, I played Suicidal Thoughts at the cabin and my sister and Deluxe turned it off and said this is bullshit. I hate when people do that shit. ::Looks at LP::

Aside from LP's tweet, I'm seeing a lot of tweets about there being a big AIDS problem in Brasil. Is it really that bad there?

Wayne Brady is KILLING. I love that negro. I'd give Ellen Barkin the business for sure. I love Carrie Fisher, too. She's so imperfect, and such a big deal for being Leia. I like my celebs being flawed to all fuck.

H, do you really want out of the NFL Keeper? I'd rather keep you in since you're an active member, and have Josh bail and kick commish duties over to me.

Go search the #SadderdayOlympics hashtag on twitter. That shit's hilarious.

Holy fuck, Halfway Between The Gutter And The Stars is such an awesome album. I forgot about this shit.

I don't know. I think I'm done. I'm gonna get screwed out of getting Labor Day off. Whatever.

219 comments:

1 – 200 of 219   Newer›   Newest»
tem said...

Working on labor day would be time and a half, right?

tem said...

I've never gotten into the roasts.

tem said...

Have freak give meiz commishability.

Mize said...

"Working on labor day would be time and a half, right?"

Time & a half plus a full day of regular pay.

El Padrino said...

katey segal

yes please

El Padrino said...

"Is it really that bad there?"

prostitutes

tem said...

"Time & a half plus a full day of regular pay."

sounds like a deal

El Padrino said...

yeah that's called overtime

tem said...

overtime plus a full day of pay.

that is 2.5 times.

overtime is just 1.5 times.


unless i am misremembering / misreading.

My Boo said...

sysco announces earnings today...big day

Mize said...

"sysco announces earnings today...big day"

Up from last year pretty significantly

My Boo said...

"Up from last year pretty significantly"

well of course, they have the meiz now

My Boo said...

meiz with the insider info...if I acted on this, i could go to jail

Blue said...

get outta here large marge

Mize said...

Erm...Maybe not. Spoke a little too fast

Keef said...

Erm...Maybe not. Spoke a little too fast



People heard you were working on Labor Day. Noone puts mize in a corner

Keef said...

Lane Kiffin is such a baby

El Padrino said...

with a hot wife

El Padrino said...

jessie j got a fat ass
i'd hit that

El Padrino said...

everytime i see the name of ochocinco's wife i can't get the image of the antoine walker shimmy out of my head

Blue said...

blue got too cocky against Wyoming...was up by 18 with about 3 or 4 minutes left and kept trying to run the score up. ended up in a tie game and had to kick a FG to win as time expired

Blue said...

in other dynasty news...blue led idaho to a win over LSU in Baton Rouge...

Blue said...

and now i'm done with my NCAA talk

El Padrino said...

keef you want to sell me your p90x?

Mize said...

I can pretty much do my job drunk. Thsi ios rediculous.

Mize said...

Knows Engrish

tem said...

why do you want to buy it? he can just send you dvd copies, no?

El Padrino said...

oh it's just dvd's?

the fuck

El Padrino said...

what is it?

a program? i thought it had chin up bars and resistance bands or something

tem said...

i guess there are bands.

El Padrino said...

what's the one endorsed by the MMA guy the guy with the fucked up ear in The Expendables

Tyler said...

Man, Katey Sagal is all kinds of fine.

^^^^^^^^^^^
^^^^^^^^^^^
^^^^^^^^^^^
^^^^^^^^^^^
^^^^^^^^^^^
^^^^^^^^^^^

El Padrino said...

did you see the rib protectors qb's have been wearing this year

they are new, some new company

andrew luck wore them and you noticed them immediately they are huge

tem said...

haven't seen katey segal in years.

Keef said...

King Tut appears on the Egyptian one-pound coin.

Keef said...

jessie j got a heartbeat
i'd hit that


*fized

tem said...

fyi Pfeiffer is like 4 years younger than sagal.

Keef said...

what is it?

a program? i thought it had chin up bars and resistance bands or something



You buy that shit separately

Keef said...

fyi Pfeiffer is like 4 years younger than sagal.



And looks like she's 30 years older than Sagal

El Padrino said...

"You buy that shit separately"

fuck that

is it good i mean obviously it's gotten very positive reviews but i'd like to think what a normal dude thinks of it

El Padrino said...

Pack signing of Ced Benson is ya-huge

El Padrino said...

replacement refs have been hilarity

Keef said...

is it good i mean obviously it's gotten very positive reviews but i'd like to think what a normal dude thinks of it



It's good if you have time for that shit

tem said...

cmtem does p90x and does not have chin up bars or anything.

she has bands.

Keef said...

I have a chin up bar. It's under the bed in the spare bedroom

Mize said...

"haven't seen katey segal in years."


DOOOOOD! Mr Futurama Man should be all up on his Katey Sagal fineness. WFT.

tem said...

since that is a cartoon i don't see her much.

Mize said...

"Pack signing of Ced Benson is ya-huge"


Packers fans hate the signing because "he's a thug"(read: black)

I spent part of the weekend explaining to them that he's far and away the best tailback they've had since Ahman Green's heyday.

El Padrino said...

"I have a chin up bar. It's under the bed in the spare bedroom"

which one

mount for doorway with screws and shit or just the one you cram in there

i have some free weights
i just dont want to watch dvd's while i work out for 20 min

i'd rather watch business news or sports whilst i get fit

Keef said...

which one



The room that has the empty bed

Keef said...

(S)

Keef said...

mount for doorway with screws and shit or just the one you cram in there


Just the one you can put in the doorway and take down

Keef said...

i just dont want to watch dvd's while i work out for 20 min

i'd rather watch business news or sports whilst i get fit



1) 60 minutes, not 20
B) You'd probably be able to have the routine down after 1 or 2 times so then you could watch whatever

Keef said...

But Ab Ripper X would give you your 6 pack by July

El Padrino said...

"1) 60 minutes, not 20
B) You'd probably be able to have the routine down after 1 or 2 times so then you could watch whatever"

i dont have an hour a day

thanks for the info

El Padrino said...

i'll design my own program

Keef said...

ha

Keef said...

If you & mize collaborated on it, it would be the best.workoutprogram.evAr!

El Padrino said...

and sell it to dads with jobs and kids

Mize said...

"i'll design my own program"

right.

Keef said...

and sell it to dads with jobs and kids



If I didn't work a night, I'd have time to do it

Keef said...

right.



^^^

El Padrino said...

WATCH OUT

I'm out of my rut and into my conquering the fuck out of my life phase

shit i even bought gelato yesterday and woke up early and worked out a bit

El Padrino said...

"If I didn't work a night, I'd have time to do it"

that's why i will design a program for us man

you are my target

men with jobs (plural) and kids

El Padrino said...

real actors reading yelp reviews is fucking hilarious

Keef said...

I'm out of my rut


That was quick

tem said...

they have a set of dvds that are like p90x but are only 15 minutes each.

tem said...

mostly you just run 40yd dashes for 10 minutes then do push ups and sit ups.

El Padrino said...

"That was quick"

when you write it all down, all the thoughts in your head, it helps

looking at that list, it seems pretty ridiculous the fact is i have a great life without any of that shit, dont get me wrong that shit is nice and i still want some of it but why get pissed over silly shit

Keef said...

why get pissed over silly shit



^^^^

Keef said...

YOLO!

El Padrino said...

it all stemmed from work anyway

shit is a grind

firefighter life just seems so wonderful
(until the day you actually have to run into a burning building)

Keef said...

It's ok. We all have our woements

Mize said...

They play Some Nights on one of the radio stations we get to listen to here.

YAASSSSS!

El Padrino said...

im surprised plax hasnt been picked up yet

history aside dude still looks like a 25 year old and his hands are sick

Mize said...

"firefighter life just seems so wonderful"

That shit seems awful to me.

BBBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 3:00 AM!!! GET UP! FIGHT FIRE.







fuck that. I'm sleep tho.

Mize said...

"im surprised plax hasnt been picked up yet"

Isn't he in camp with the Pats now?

El Padrino said...

meiz you seriously buy music? like not digital?

besides like whole albums for collecting of course

El Padrino said...

"firefighter life just seems so wonderful"

That shit seems awful to me."

there isn't a fire everyday maybe a few car wrecks since they typically are first responders but
most of the time they sit around watching movies, busting balls, video games, work out, go food shopping and eating gigantic home cooked meals

El Padrino said...

"Isn't he in camp with the Pats now?"

trying out yes, no word on them signing him

they got 10 WR's on the roster (wft) - and like 8 TE's

cuts gonna be a bitch you.

El Padrino said...

"woements"

add that shit to merriman's*

Keef said...

add that shit to merriman's*



what does that even mean?

El Padrino said...

dictionary, add it

Keef said...

That shit seems awful to me.



It's not like Backdraft. Like LP said, seems like a pretty good gig.

Keef said...

You get a brutal accident call every now and then, but from what I hear, 90% of the calls are easy

Keef said...

I hate when I go to eat a banana and it's not ripe yet

El Padrino said...

"You get a brutal accident call every now and then, but from what I hear, 90% of the calls are easy"

depends on locaton right?
like here in brooklyn if you get a shitty hood could be fires all the time in abandond buildings and shit

or if you are near a major highway you'll get all the brutal car wrecks like you said which really you don't do much and have very little chance of hurting yourself

worse case - 70% of the calls are easy

still seems like a good gig
seemingly unlimited days off or maneuvering of schedule allows you to have all kinds of days off in a row, injury time, calling out, ot, etc.

El Padrino said...

"I hate when I go to eat a banana and it's not ripe yet"

i like them on the under-ripened side

Blue said...

yeah, except then you have to go fight wildfires in colorado and spend days in the forest in a hot suit

Keef said...

seemingly unlimited days off or maneuvering of schedule allows you to have all kinds of days off in a row, injury time, calling out, ot, etc.



Downside is having to work a lot of holidays

El Padrino said...

yeah but that gets better as time moves along you build up some seniority and before you know know it there is always a rookie that is under you

El Padrino said...

wildfires are a whole different animal

El Padrino said...

location location location

El Padrino said...

metro area houses arent fighting those wildfires

are they blue?

Keef said...

They have "hot shots" here that work a lot of the fires. They're forest service people. I think there are more of them than there are metro area firefighters

Blue said...

guys come in from all over the country typically for big forest fires.

Usually they get leave from their local station and come work because the OT pay is ridiculous.

local house guys will go out and fight the wildfires, same drill, and that means the guys left behind are typically picking up all the extra shifts

Mize said...

"meiz you seriously buy music? like not digital?"

What? No.

Mize said...

WTF would give you that impression?

Keef said...

cmk & I were watching the Olympics on Saturday night. They were running the 5000 meters. Cmk says "how long is 5000 meters". I said it's about 3.2 miles. Cmk says "Oh, so it's basically like a 5K?" I say "yeah, 5000 = 5K". Then she gave me a ::fuck off::

tem said...

el pad should just say he is a firefighter and go fight forest fires.

tem said...

"Cmk says "Oh, so it's basically like a 5K?" I say "yeah, 5000 = 5K". Then she gave me a ::fuck off::"

haha

Blue said...

stupid metric system

El Padrino said...

"WTF would give you that impression?"

always talking about "albums"

i just download songs not albums

tem said...

i buy cds still. then cmtem puts them on her computer and her ipod and i do the same.

if we bought digital we'd have to buy twice, right?

Keef said...

if we bought digital we'd have to buy twice, right?



no

El Padrino said...

is that von miller

Keef said...

No, it's Joey Votto

El Padrino said...

fucking wiseass

Blue said...

it is the von, and his pimp glasses

Blue said...

supposedly he's been offered a bunch of promo deals to get lasik and turnt them all down.

he has almost 300 pairs of glasses, so he can wear a different one every day

Blue said...

also he has a degree in poultry science and wants to buy something like 20k chickens.

the house he's building is out in the middle of nowhere and he's gonna start with 25 chickens

this is all (ns)

Blue said...

he's a very eccentric dude

Keef said...

poultry science? wft?

El Padrino said...

blue has Von chills

El Padrino said...

what does he wear on gameday contacts?

that is dumb he should get lasik and just wear the glasses the same way those NBA idiots wear them

El Padrino said...

I DONT BELIEVE IN ANYBODY FEELS THE WAY I DO ABOUT YOU NOW

El Padrino said...

*that

tem said...

"no"

how do i get the song onto her itunes then?

El Padrino said...

the raja davis catch

like whoa

Keef said...

how do i get the song onto her itunes then?



You can share files between your 2 computers on your wireless network

Keef said...

the raja davis catch

like whoa




Haven't seen it, but heard about it. Get my new phone on Wednesday so I have to make a note to self.

Blue said...

"poultry science? wft?"

that's what you learn at Texas A&M

Keef said...

that's what you learn at Texas A&M



ah. makes cents*

Mize said...

"always talking about "albums""

You must not know what an album is.

El Padrino said...

so you download every song on an album

im saying i dont bother to do that
that's all

tem said...

"You can share files between your 2 computers on your wireless network"

through itunes?

Blue said...

yes, or you can cloud it

Blue said...

you can share itunes on up to 5 devices

tem said...

her account and mine can mix?

tem said...

i know i can put my songs on different devices, but i didn't know i could access her itunes and mine from the same computer.

Blue said...

you'd have to merge them

Blue said...

i did that with cmblue a few weeks ago.

didn't suck

Mize said...

"im saying i dont bother to do that
that's all"


No wonder you think music sucks now

Keef said...

im saying i dont bother to do that, except for Frankie Valli, the greatest rock in* roll band of all time
that's all



*fized

tem said...

hmm...i will look into this merging thing.

tem said...

not sure i want her lady gaga stuff merging with my eric church.

Keef said...

hmm...i will look into this merging thing.


Also, if you buy muzak on, say, Amazon, they have a cloud type feature that saves the file. You can have that on multiple computers too

tem said...

never bought music on amazon.

tem said...

haven't bought through itunes in forever either.

tem said...

still just get the cd and then download them onto each of our accounts.

Mize said...

"not sure i want her lady gaga stuff merging with my eric church."


Give it a try. Gaga makes some outstanding music. There's a reason she sells a bazillion records. Seriously though.

I transferred my entire iTunes library onto my sister's laptop, and now she's getting all kinds of into the rippty rap.

El Padrino said...

thank god i dont have to sit through another Grimm commercial

that show looks terrible

El Padrino said...

haven't bought through itunes in forever either.


stop buying music

tem said...

i'm not opposed to shelling out $12 for a CD i like.

Keef said...

Give it a try. Gaga makes some outstanding music. There's a reason she sells a bazillion records




Britney Spears also sold a bazillion records

El Padrino said...

Gaga makes some outstanding music.

stop it

Mize said...

"i'm not opposed to shelling out $12 for a CD i like."

Cheaper for the digital copy.

Mize said...

"stop it"

FACT.

Mize said...

I have some Gaga that I stole. I'm not saying I'd pay for it, but fuck it. There's all kinds of good shit out there.

Keef said...

i'm not opposed to shelling out $12 for a CD i like.



It has nice ambiance. It knows what you want to eat. It has nice art on the cover. The company is pleasant.

tem said...

"Cheaper for the digital copy."

up until today i thought i had to buy 2 digital copies. 1 for me and 1 for cmtem.

Keef said...

up until today i thought i had to buy 2 digital copies. 1 for me and 1 for cmtem.



You just got lesson number one. Don't think. It can only hurt the ballclub.

tem said...

ok coach

Keef said...

it's from a grate movie

El Padrino said...

tem probably hasnt seen bull durham

tem said...

not all the way through

Mize said...

"up until today i thought i had to buy 2 digital copies. 1 for me and 1 for cmtem."


And you're a computer game nerd that wants to build his own PC??

tem said...

bits and pieces.

tem said...

"And you're a computer game nerd that wants to build his own PC??"

exactly why i ended up not building my own.

if i don't know this shit then there is no way i know how to build one.

tem said...

i could connect the parts, probably, but once it got to installing and/or updating BIOS i gave it a big ::fuck that::

El Padrino said...

"Yes. OK. Yes, yes, yes. It happened. I was in Thailand, we had an affair. Sweet kiss, beautiful lovemaking.
It would be abnormal not to have had an affair, she’s so beautiful and she was there in front of me every day with a beautiful smile, simpatico, so charming, she wasn’t acting like a big star. I knew Thailand very well, so I showed her my Thailand. She’s a great lady."

JCVD banged Kylie Minogue on set of Street Fighter which is super old

Keef said...

not all the way through



wow

El Padrino said...

meiz is right

jeff ross always kills

i think it's because this is the only thing he does in life

tem said...

"wow"

you should not be surprised

Keef said...

you should not be surprised


Normally I'd agree. But for some reason it shocks & surprises me that you haven't seen Bull Durham

tem said...

i've probably seen all the scenes, just never at one time.

Blue said...

shoulda got a live chicken

tem said...

that's a different movie

Keef said...

no

Keef said...

WT

Blue said...

he's right, they need a live rooster in BD

Keef said...

just read all the BD quotes on IMDB. I gotta watch that again, soon.

El Padrino said...

when you get your new phone

Keef said...

sure

tem said...

"he's right, they need a live rooster in BD"

apology accepted.

chicken is major league.

Keef said...

Never seen Major League


/tem

Keef said...

O:FB

Blue said...

tem hasn't seen enough of Bull Durham to know that Major League just recycled a lot of the same jokes

El Padrino said...

piece

Aitch said...

I agree with Meiz on Lady Gaga

Mize said...

H! My dude!

Mize said...

"Britney Spears also sold a bazillion records"

Oh, you don't know the words & shit? Riiight.

Keef said...

Oh, you don't know the words & shit? Riiight.



And so do you. And so does everyone here. That has nothing to do with the point. You said that Gaga makes "outstanding" music, and used the she's sold a bazillion records as proof that the music is outstanding.
Britney has also sold a brazillion records, and her music is whatever the opposite of outstanding is. Instanding

Mize said...

Eh.

That's your OPINION

Keef said...

Insitting. Inlaying. Inkneeling

Keef said...

That's your OPINION




Which he's entitled too

/H

Mize said...

I can never remember the 2nd part of that

kod said...

"Nishioka, who signed a three-year, $9.25 million deal after the 2010 season, was called up after third baseman Danny Valencia was traded to Boston. After going 0 for 12 with three errors in a three-game series at Cleveland, he was benched for a three-game set against Tampa Bay (and has been again demoted)."


He'll be remembered among other Minnesota greats like Spurgon Wynn and Felton Spencer

Mize said...

I loved Spergon Wynn. COLOV

Keef said...

i had to google that

Keef said...

It's awesome dealing with mfers every day that just lie through their teeth.

ns

Keef said...

and I'm not talking about mize

(S)

Mize said...

"It's awesome dealing with mfers every day that just lie through their teeth."

Truck drivers & dispatchers. I fuckin' hate being lied to because it fucks my day up. And my boss is one of those guys that's a dickhead but he doesn't actually know that.

Blue said...

like me

Keef said...

I fuckin' hate being lied to because it fucks my day up.


It's not that I like these people lying to me. But it's hilarious because I know they're lying and every once in a while I can catch them and they don't have a way to respond to it

Mize said...

"like me"

Nah. He's the dude that talks to everybody in a really condescending way, but he doesn't know he does it.

The worst is when we'll have a chain of like 3 or 4 really good jokes over the radio and then the boss wants to chime in with one, and it's like "Uhh, you just fucked up the run of hilarity we were on, bro."

Mize said...

I think I'm gonna tembag the shit out of people during this election.

Mize said...

Deluxe doesn't even realize when I'm insulting him anymore. Jesus christ, what a fuckin' married old man.

Mize said...

I have a financial question that I'm gonna pose here as well as on Twitter.

What percentage of your paychecks do you put in your savings vs your checking account?

NS

I ask because I know I'm doing it wrong.

tem said...

5

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