Friday, March 23, 2012

smartphone batteries suck

Lamp.

I dont know what kony is and i refuse to look it up.  Someone told me it was about Uganda which is perfect because I dont give a fuck about Uganda.  I give a fuck about USA! USA! USA! and Europe.  Because that shit is global now.

Wait Punk'd is back?  With Kutcher? 

Couch.

If I can be a reptile I'd be iguana. 

Mich St. got pounded that was a surprise.  Bo Ryan doesnt coach last minute plays?  They shot the three ball pretty good.  Pretty fucking good.  My bracket is a mess like your face.  This ohio vs ohio game is suuiiiite right now.

HOPPER! DA HOPPER.  HOPPER!

Sidetable.

I love pizza.  I love pizza so much that I'd probably live in the NYC metro area my whole life.  And I know there is good pizza out there but as far as everyday pizza, cmon son.  I need new sunglasses.

I think I;d take RG!!! over Luck.  He needs to bulk up though I mean cuz he's gonna take some shots in the NFL. 

What is with shit I used to own growing up making a comeback and costing triple the money.  Like sneakers.  Can you believe kids are rocking snap back hats?  SNAP BACKS!!!!  They were frowned upon when fitted's got popular.  They were shunned.  Nothing was better than a fresh 59/50 hat.

Happy Easter.

Pizza rustica what
leg of lamb what

Laundrymat does dry cleaning now too.  I ask what prioce she says everting is tree dollar

shirt? tree dollar
pant? tree dollar
jacket? tree dollar

excellent price points

Do you have cut rate insurance?  If you do mayehm will find you.  And it will take you down.

whitney cocktail >>> ledger cocktail

392 comments:

1 – 200 of 392   Newer›   Newest»
Aitch said...

I am a serious fan of drunken LP posts.

Aitch said...

"smartphone batteries suck"

THIS^^^^^^^

Aitch said...

Women are irrational creatures.

Beth said...

"Women are irrational creatures"

Yes.

But we know we can get away with it cause we have girl parts.

Beth said...

It's like the very old joke:

Q: Why do women have vaginas?
A: So men will talk to them.

tem said...

But Beth has a penis /zeke

tem said...

Big east promptly sucked after my "big east!" Comment.

tem said...

I'm gonna be real late for work. Lazy.

Jugdish said...

shirt? tree dollar
pant? tree dollar
jacket? tree dollar

excellent price points


its like 99 cents for shirts at a lot of dry cleaners down here (even in cypress, mize)

Jugdish said...

I'm gonna be real late for work. Lazy.



i overslept today, must have turned my alarm off on the 2nd or 3rd snooze attempt

Jugdish said...

you know that feeling on a work morning where you wake up without the alarm, get a good stretch in and feel well rested and for a moment you feel like you beat the alarm? then you look at your clock or phone and realize you're gonna be an hour late...

that was me this morning

Jugdish said...

I am a serious fan of drunken LP posts.


^^^^^

all over the map

Jugdish said...

Lp, do you drink on thursday nights just for the drunk posts now? we approve

Jugdish said...

from my friend's fb page...

"Why is it, if you pick up a dog from an animal shelter, you are a hero, a rescuer..... But if you pick up a weekend girlfriend from the women's shelter, you're a creep?"

Beth said...

"Lp, do you drink on thursday nights just for the drunk posts now? we approve"

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Jugdish said...

i can imagine the conversation...

cmlp: Anthony, its thursday night, can't you at least wait until the weekend to get drunk?

lp: can't babe (WORKS another beer), its my turn to post on the blog tomorrow

cmlp: ::short stack::...then hides his ipod under the bed again

El Padrino said...

"Lp, do you drink on thursday nights just for the drunk posts now? we approve"

if i posted on tuesdays it'd be the same

i drink a little bit more however on thursday cuz cmep works so i can squeeze in alot before she gets home

El Padrino said...

i'm sick

El Padrino said...

but under control

El Padrino said...

Q: Why do women have vaginas?
A: So men will talk to them.

not funny, truth

El Padrino said...

"its like 99 cents for shirts "

good deal

it's the pants that break the bank

tem said...

" drink a little bit more however on thursday cuz cmep works so i can squeeze in alot before she gets home"

so thursday is drunken dad night?

Jugdish said...

Lp's heaven

El Padrino said...

"so thursday is drunken dad night?"

this sounds alot worse than it is they are alseep by the time i reach maximum drunkedness

tem said...

no worries. i bet keith and blue get drunk all the time when they are home alone with the kid(s).

tp probably did too.

h will once baby mama h pops.

Jugdish said...

this sounds alot worse than it is they are alseep by the time i reach maximum drunkedness



no, it sounds about right

Keef said...

Remember that lady in Missouri a few months ago that got fucked up at home one night after her kid went to bed, and then the kid disappeared and they never found him/her? That probably sounded worse than it was

tem said...

i don't remember that because it wasn't a big deal

tem said...

life sucks, sometimes your parent gets drunk

Keef said...

LP is a NYC parent so it does sound about right

Aitch said...

$3 dollars a piece is pretty good. Usually a suit and a couple shirts runs me up over $20

Aitch said...

Keef your drawing of Taiwan made me Aitch. Well done.

El Padrino said...

what you fail to remember is a highly functional drunk

i can fly a plane after a six pack and bottle of wine

El Padrino said...

it was like my weed back in the day

i'd need 6 blunts just to get nice at one point

gambling, $50 was nothing i was betting in the thousands at one point

addictive behavior

Blue said...

so everything is more exaggerated in NYC...got it

tem said...

i doubt you can fly a plane sober.

tem said...

you can probably drive a car after all that booze, but i'm going to guess you have never flown a plane at all.

Beth said...

"so everything is more exaggerated in NYC...got it"

LMC

/EP

tem said...

also, i imagine flying a plane is easy once you get in the air. no traffic signals, no other planes cutting you off, no pedestrains....

tem said...

taking off and especially landing would be a bitch.

El Padrino said...

obviously im trying to make a point

El Padrino said...

i am interested in flying

colov

El Padrino said...

when i was a kid i wanted to be a pilot

El Padrino said...

i had alot of model airplanes and trains

real boy stuff

El Padrino said...

i had an iguana and that motherfucker was cool as shit

i had a snake

it died, woudlnt eat
very strange, then i got another one and he escaped and this made my mother flip the fuck out so no more reptiles after that

tem said...

i wanted to get a pilots license.

cmtem said no.

tem said...

i was about to sign up for classes and then those oklahoma st. coaches died in a plane crash and then cmtem said there was no way.

El Padrino said...

hot wheels was my shit

El Padrino said...

"was about to sign up for classes"

no time for that shit

when im like 45 and going through a midlife crisis i will pursue this

El Padrino said...

man this guy had a bad mishapen head

looks like the doctor yanked him out with some bbq tongs

Meiz said...

"I dont know what kony is and i refuse to look it up."


Shocking

Meiz said...

Snapbacks are fucking trash.

Meiz said...

"$3 dollars a piece is pretty good. Usually a suit and a couple shirts runs me up over $20"


You have a suit? Or just a shirt, jacket, pants combo?

Meiz said...

"i'd need 6 blunts just to get nice at one point"


This is a fucking lie.

Keef said...

In the past 5 years, the odds of a U.S. plane having a fatal crash were 1 in 49M.

Keef said...

LP is an embellisher

El Padrino said...

"i'd need 6 blunts just to get nice at one point"


This is a fucking lie.

no lie, i wasnt taking them all to my head had smoking pals but basically i was hitting on something 5-7 times a day at one point after the first 2 or 3 i wasnt getting high

your body adapts

El Padrino said...

"In the past 5 years, the odds of a U.S. plane having a fatal crash were 1 in 49M."

russia is like 1 in 2

El Padrino said...

"You have a suit? Or just a shirt, jacket, pants combo?"


isnt that a suit
i have a suit

it's a pants shir jacket combo

Keef said...

A shirt/jacket/pants combo doesn't necessarily have to be a suit

Keef said...

Man, Jeremy Shockey gonna get PAID by the NFL if he decides to sue

Keef said...

Keef your drawing of Taiwan made me Aitch. Well done.



Thanks. I'm a Picas.o

El Padrino said...

A shirt/jacket/pants combo doesn't necessarily have to be a suit

you mean the tie makes the "suit"

El Padrino said...

i have a suit, you seen it

/vincent gambini

Keef said...

I have a sportcoat that I wear with different pant combos. I wouldn't consider that a suit

Keef said...

A suit is matching pant/jacket combo

Keef said...

Why was Louisville wearing orange unis last night?

Spaceman Spiff said...

kardashian floured

"Meanwhile her mother Kris told the website: 'If anybody comes at me with something, call security.'"

like anybody gives a shit about her

Spaceman Spiff said...

"He needs to bulk up though I mean cuz he's gonna take some shots in the NFL. "

SHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTSSHOTS

Spaceman Spiff said...

fuk yes

jason smith ran though blake like a free safety, blake actually got hit this time, but was still acting

Blue said...

liked that shot

Blue said...

jump over that hyundai blake griffin

Meiz said...

Okay, I gotta go buy a Brewers ticket for Easter.

Aitch said...

Another reason why I love my new job. $837 just in tips on my check. Woot!

El Padrino said...

"I have a sportcoat that I wear with different pant combos. I wouldn't consider that a suit"

i would consider that gay

El Padrino said...

"Another reason why I love my new job. $837 just in tips on my check. Woot!"

so you can afford a 12pack now?

cuz i sure am thirsty

Keef said...

i would consider that gay



You would know

Meiz said...

"i would consider that gay"


You can't be serious.

Aitch said...

I have a couple suits, Meiz. I gotta wear them for work. All black, white shirt, company tie. Gotta look the part.

El Padrino said...

not my style

that's how hamptons crowd would dress

slacks, shirt, different color jacket usually dark jacket/light pants

shit is not my style

jacket/pants must be same color in my closet

El Padrino said...

i forgot aitch's new gig

dispatcher?

Aitch said...

I may drive to brooklyn, one shot you when you answer the door, place the six pack down and drive back.

That would be fun.

Meiz said...

ONE SHOT!

Keef said...

i forgot aitch's new gig

dispatcher?




Yes. usually dispatchers are required to dress in a black suit

Spaceman Spiff said...

"for tonight we shall drink wine spritzers, his favorite beverage and also mine."

drake

Aitch said...

New gig is as a chauffeur with a different company. No joke, I'm grossing 2.5 times what I used to. Paying mad bills right now. 6 months I'll be completely debt free except for the car I just bought.

El Padrino said...

"Yes. usually dispatchers are required to dress in a black suit"

Limo companies yes

El Padrino said...

"I may drive to brooklyn, one shot you when you answer the door, place the six pack down and drive back.

That would be fun."

incredible

Keef said...

wine spritzer is cmk's drink

El Padrino said...

my doorbell is broken though

hit me up on the celly if you do that

Aitch said...

So you won't be debt free. Got it.

/as.

Keef said...

New gig is as a chauffeur with a different company. No joke, I'm grossing 2.5 times what I used to. Paying mad bills right now. 6 months I'll be completely debt free except for the car I just bought.




Good for you man..

NS

Keef said...

hit me up on the celly if you do that



at 1am

El Padrino said...

hamptons crowd drink wine spritzers while they rock khaki's and dark jacket

Keef said...

So you won't be debt free. Got it.

/as.




I wouldn't say that. You put "except" in there

Spaceman Spiff said...

"I'll be completely debt free except for the car I just bought."

interesting

Jugdish said...

Good for you man..

NS


^^^^^^^^^^^

Keef said...

hamptons crowd drink wine spritzers while they rock khaki's and dark jacket



I don't wear khakis with the jacket. I'm not a boater

El Padrino said...

debt free is a dream

Aitch said...

Thanks, boys. My stress level is way down. Like, I still stress a little cuz like I said, I'm paying a bunch of shit down so money is still a little tight, but seeing that light at the end if the tunnel makes things a lot better.

Blue said...

blue hopes to be debt free (except house and car) by October

Aitch said...

No one is ever completely debt free. I guess I should have said caught up. Better terminology, Padrino?

El Padrino said...

aitch your uncles made a commercial about a new DVR?

Blue said...

meiz

El Padrino said...

"blue hopes to be debt free (except house and car) by October"

so not debt free got it

/keef

Blue said...

tha hoppa

i'm calling directv to see if can get free shit by telling them i'm switching to tha hoppa

Spaceman Spiff said...

"Joba Chamberlain dislocated his right ankle while jumping on a trampoline with his son. He underwent surgery last night and GM Brian Cashman has labeled it a “significant injury.” There is no timetable for his return as of now."

hilarity

El Padrino said...

island guy bought me a bottle of rum from trinidad

suite

Aitch said...

I don't get your DVR reference, Tony. I don't watch a lot of TV.

El Padrino said...

hahahahahah fat joba

so much for trading phil hughes now

Spaceman Spiff said...

"Denver signed a new target for Peyton Manning: former Texans tight end Joel Dreessen"

El Padrino said...

da happah

Spaceman Spiff said...

"Former Colts C Jeff Saturday is close to agreeing to a deal with the Packers"

Aitch said...

Report here was Joba has an open dislocation. Which, if I am not mistaken, means the bone punched through his skin. Sounds very painful.

El Padrino said...

you are not mistaken

it's a compound fracture

Keef said...

so not debt free got it

/keef



House & care aren't debt

Keef said...

Thanks, boys. My stress level is way down. Like, I still stress a little cuz like I said, I'm paying a bunch of shit down so money is still a little tight, but seeing that light at the end if the tunnel makes things a lot better.




Having money wouldn't make me happy

/mize

El Padrino said...

"House & care aren't debt"

a loan isnt a debt?

Keef said...

You have equity

Keef said...

maybe I meant bad debt

Keef said...

so debt. got it.

El Padrino said...

apology accepted

Aitch said...

Wearing a suit when it is 75° out kinda blows though.

Keef said...

we're getting a cr-v

Keef said...

Wearing a suit when it is 75° out kinda blows though.




There's the H we all know & love

Aitch said...

Didn't want to let you down Keef.

Keef said...

happy H is cool

El Padrino said...

wait until it's 90 out

Keef said...

finna be almost 90 here this weekend

Aitch said...

Temp is finna* drop here.

Aitch said...

I am not a fan of heat. I could never live in AZ or TX

Blue said...

wait until it's 90 and you live in bastahn

Aitch said...

I still say you guys would like Boston if you gave it half a chance.

Keef said...

I am not a fan of heat. I could never live in AZ or TX


Get out of the kitchen

Blue said...

i wouldn't like boston

ToddPacker said...

"i'm calling directv to see if can get free shit by telling them i'm switching to tha hoppa"

I did it last year and got the set up for a big discount... they wouldn't do it for free

Blue said...

but there was no hoppa last year

Blue said...

i'm sure they won't do it for free either, but maybe i'll get a free dvr out of it

mine is over 5 years old and on its last legs

Blue said...

i was thinking about holding out until NFL sunday ticket goes on sale, then telling them to give me that for free and hook me up with a new DVR

El Padrino said...

this calamari is tough man i want my money back

tem said...

tem might be getting direct tv when he moves.

tp and blue can fight over the referral.

El Padrino said...

i would like bahstan

it's just that for a ny'er it's like montague and capulet

frowned upon

Keef said...

tem might be getting direct tv when he moves.

tp and blue can fight over the referral.




Douche

Blue said...

kevin got the jug referral a few years ago i think

El Padrino said...

fucking hangover III

Keef said...

And he obliquely addressed the racial component of the case, saying it struck home for him because, "If I had a son, he'd look like Trayvon."



all black people look alike

/Obama

Keef said...

kevin got the jug referral a few years ago i think



So?

Keef said...

fucking hangover III



Hangover 2 was hilarity

El Padrino said...

due date was hilarious too

El Padrino said...

austin rivers going pro

Keef said...

San Gennaro Feast here this weekend. Apparently I need to go, according to NY guy

tem said...

you are getting a new car, so you must not need the referral.

Keef said...

due date was hilarious too



didn't see it

Keef said...

you are getting a new car, so you must not need the referral.



Wrong. I'm getting a new car, therefore I need the referral.

Not getting a new car because we want a new car. This is to get rid of the death masheen*

tem said...

we can't duplicate your issue /vovlkwagen maintenance

tem said...

wow i butchered volkswagen

Jugdish said...

mize as a garbage man

Jugdish said...

I am not a fan of heat. I could never live in AZ or TX



wussbag

tem said...

meiz will do fine in the TX heat.

Jugdish said...

look forward to his tuites* about the heat, followed by the "wussbag" replies

Keef said...

mize ain't moving to Texas

Keef said...

He already found his "out". Housing is too expensive

Blue said...

i thought housing was like $600/month

Blue said...

shoot, i bet we could take up a collection at LOV to pay for the uhaul

Blue said...

jug would help him unload it i'm sure

Jugdish said...

i thought housing was like $600/month


HAHAHA...thats like 3 houses in NYC!!!

/Lp

Blue said...

maybe he could just live with jug

Jugdish said...

jug would help him unload it i'm sure



careful with that tv

/mize

Jugdish said...

jug would help him unload it i'm sure



mize, has this auger always leaked?

/jug

Jugdish said...

maybe he could just live with jug



no

/fmjug

Meiz said...

Chef Boyardee Sports Shapes & Meatballs.

DET.

Keef said...

i thought housing was like $600/month




It's a ripoff for people that make 20 thousand dollars a year.


/mize

Meiz said...

"mize ain't moving to Texas"

I'm trying, dude. If they offer me that job, I'm outta here.

El Padrino said...

0%

Meiz said...

"Having money wouldn't make me happy

/mize"


Fuck is wrong with you? Money is exactly what would make me happy.

Meiz said...

"look forward to his tuites* about the heat, followed by the "wussbag" replies"

Got DAMN, it's hot den a muhfucker here.

/Mize Texas tuite

Keef said...

0%



LP knows

Keef said...

Fuck is wrong with you? Money is exactly what would make me happy.




But not too much

Jugdish said...

regardless of how much money someone has, they always think a little more will make them happy

Jugdish said...

amex made me happy

/Lp

Keef said...

regardless of how much money someone has, they always think a little more will make them happy



Dat's what I'm sayin! mize thinks he'll be content with an uncontentful* amount

Meiz said...

"He already found his "out". Housing is too expensive"


No it isn't.


And by the way, I'm with El Padrino. Why do you make a point to go out of your way to shit on people? I ask again. Who hurt you?

Meiz said...

"But not too much"

Can never have too much.

Jugdish said...

Who hurt you?




its not your fault

its not your fault

tem said...

keith is just mad because "you" are so much better than "him"

Keef said...

I'm just shitting on you, mize. It's fun

El Padrino said...

it's never enough

Keef said...

keith is just mad because "you" are so much better than "him"



^^^^^^

Blue said...

you guys with all your bickering

El Padrino said...

"And by the way, I'm with El Padrino. Why do you make a point to go out of your way to shit on people? I ask again. Who hurt you?"

nah i keed, you are good people

/keef

El Padrino said...

And by the way, I'm with El Padrino. Why do you make a point to go out of your way to shit on people? I ask again. Who hurt you?


DOUBLE DRAGON!

Keef said...

no matter how many battles I been in and won
no matter how many magazines on my nutz
no matter how many MCs I eat up
ooooh it's never enough

Keef said...

I'm not really going out of my way to do it. It's all right here in front of me, mize

tem said...

"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H

Jugdish said...

I'm not really going out of my way to do it. It's all right here in front of me, mize. its not my fault my confidence is off-putting

fixed

Jugdish said...

wall

Meiz said...

JugWalls are great

Meiz said...

"• If selected for an interview, you will be asked to come to Minute Maid Park in person. You will be responsible for any travel arrangements you choose to make for interview purposes."


Fuck. Carrying on.

El Padrino said...

let me tweet that for you

El Padrino said...

0%

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