Tuesday, February 08, 2011

Does anyone else....

...sometimes sit in their car when they are driving and wonder what it would be like if they suddenly got sent back in time? Like me and my car and all the stuff in it would be in the 1770s. My coat is red, would the Americans think I was British? Would anyone believe that I was from the future? Would they just steal my car? Do I have enough gas to outrun them for awhile and hide? How are the roads, would I just get stuck? Would anyone play softball with me? I have a couple bats and a few balls in my car. Also I have bowling shoes, would those come in handy at all? How long would my ipod battery last? Could I write some songs down and make some money? Would I be bigger/taller than everyone else? Yeah me neither, I never think those things.

...send a valentine's day card to their mom? fmtem says I should. I never have before. I did this time though because I was told to. I am smart enough to know when to fight a battle. Also I put a color swatch in it for what color the bridesmaids dresses are gonna be.

...know anything about tuxes? fmtem was asking all these questions about what kind of tux i wanted. We looked at some online. Other than the color they all looked the same to me. Oh and I could tell if they were pinstripe or not. I think I am going with black tux, no tails, vest and tie (not a bowtie). I thought about going with the little black tie tack thing for a tie, but I guess that isn't cool anymore.

...get tired of listening to coworkers talk about their babies? This isn't a dig a as. This is a dig at some chick in my office that likes to tell me about her baby's poop and how the dad gets nervous when the kid throws up a lot. Yeah, I guess I'd be nervous too if the kid threw up a lot. And there is not really any situation where I care about the type of poops this baby is having.

...ever wonder what superhero they'd be if they were allowed to be one? Superman is an obvious choice so I might take that one. But a choice I'd strongly consider would be Iceman. He seems pretty cool. haha get it? Anyway, I just think a lot of people would be taking Superman and Wolverine and Spiderman so I'd go with Iceman just to be different.

...this I should do some work? I know this guy at works thinks I should be doing some.

376 comments:

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tem said...

man some HDH in that post

Blue said...

iceman was a helluva pilot

Beth said...

"...get tired of listening to coworkers talk about their babies?"

Oh god yes. I go to lunch normally with 2 women who both have young kids and I've heard all the stories. When it gets really bad some weeks I make up excuses to go to lunch on my own. "Errands" seems to work well.

Beth said...

And you really wear a red coat tem? I hope you don't mean a sports coat.

Blue said...

not as good as maverick, but still, they called him that because of the way he flies...cold as ice..waits until you make a mistake.

Blue said...

sports coat? like a starter jacket?

Beth said...

Like a blazer.

I know women's clothes, not men's.

tem said...

"And you really wear a red coat tem? I hope you don't mean a sports coat."

no. a red jacket. i don't wear a trench coat or some sort of rich person coat to work.

Beth said...

Or maybe it's Blue who doesn't know men's clothing.

Blue said...

Starter?

Blue said...

with a huge logo on the back?

tem said...

i don't wear a blazer or sport coat in the office. at least not usually.

sometimes i do if i have an important meeting.

Blue said...

no, I know what a sports coat is....

but that's a dumb name, nobody plays sports in those

Blue said...

i only wear a suit when I have an interview to go to


/blue

tem said...

i have a sportcoat hanging on the back of my office door for emergencies, but it rarely matches the shirt and pants i am wearing, so it is pretty useless.

tem said...

about once a month i'll wear a suit and then take a long lunch.

just to keep everyone on their toes.

Blue said...

good move

Beth said...

about once a month i'll wear a suit and then take a long lunch.

just to keep everyone hopeful and their spirits up.

*fixed

El Padrino said...

crazy am

El Padrino said...

"Like me and my car and all the stuff in it would be in the 1770s."

ben franklin would fuck you up

El Padrino said...

why do you wear a red jacket

El Padrino said...

im busy this sucks

El Padrino said...

i wanna leave

El Padrino said...

im gonna start flase rumors of other people leaving to generate street buzz

El Padrino said...

i want havoc

El Padrino said...

tomorrow we get our "numbers"

El Padrino said...

hearing bad things

El Padrino said...

not happy, firm made billions
pay me

El Padrino said...

sorry bout sysco meiz

El Padrino said...

they missed earnings

Blue said...

cisco missed earnings

not sysco

tem said...

"why do you wear a red jacket"

because that is basically all they sell in Buckeye land.

Blue said...

oh, sorry, both cisco and sysco missed their earnings.

although cisco doesn't release until tomorrow.

El Padrino said...

apology accepted

Spaceman Spiff said...

center from butler got fucked up

El Padrino said...

jesus did he get shot in the ear

Jugdish said...

rut roh Lp

Blue said...

fucking lakers

El Padrino said...

"Sources described the talks as in their infancy, and a three-way deal between the Knicks, Nuggets and Wolves is very much alive."

very much alive vs infancy

we'll see

H said...

I am sick of snow.

Keef said...

just took the baby to the doctor for her 1st checkup. Her pediatrician's name is Dr. DeMets

ns

Blue said...

except wilson chandler got hurt...and doesn't want to play in Denver

El Padrino said...

wheres the toddler?

El Padrino said...

"doesn't want to play in Denver"

who gives a fuck what he wants he dont run shit

Spaceman Spiff said...

"rut roh Lp"

suite

El Padrino said...

keef you have anything to do with all the chipolte restaurants getting raided by ICE and deporting most of the workers?

Keef said...

"keef you have anything to do with all the chipolte restaurants getting raided by ICE and deporting most of the workers?"


No, I failed the cop interview

Jugdish said...

wheres the toddler?



do they have a pool?

/tem

H said...

Goddman pools

Jugdish said...

wall

Spaceman Spiff said...

rose cross then redonk dunk last night

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

"know anything about tuxes? fmtem was asking all these questions about what kind of tux i wanted. We looked at some online."


rent one from the nearest mall or wedding shop; don't buy, don't look online

El Padrino said...

"I think I am going with black tux, no tails, vest and tie (not a bowtie)."

thats all i know

El Padrino said...

just focus on food (not cake) and music let her do everything else

El Padrino said...

it's her day tem, you just stand there and smile

Blue said...

pick one that has a brand name


that way you can tell everyone "i'm wearing Ann Klein"

El Padrino said...

wear a tuxedo tshirt

because it says im formal, but im here to party

Spaceman Spiff said...

EP,
meiz's dream fuck not impressed by your girl

Spaceman Spiff said...

1 minute in

tem said...

"rent one from the nearest mall or wedding shop; don't buy, don't look online"

how do i coordinate that when the groomsmen are from:

napoleon, nd
fargo, nd
devils lake, nd
columbus, oh
pittsburgh, pa
shanghai, china

Keef said...

definitely go with the regular tie.

ns

El Padrino said...

saw that on twitter last night

Keef said...

you need more groomsman*

El Padrino said...

napoleon, nd
fargo, nd
devils lake, nd
columbus, oh
pittsburgh, pa
shanghai, china


which one does not belong

Spaceman Spiff said...

"how do i coordinate that when the groomsmen are from:"

axe* them their sizes

El Padrino said...

mens warehouse

nationwide son

El Padrino said...

and, you're gonna like the way you look

he'll gtee it

Keef said...

more groomsman* just makes the wedding ceremony longer

El Padrino said...

there is a mens warehouse in north dakota, in fargo too

obviously if there is one there there is one in columbus and burgh

unsure abotu China

Keef said...

"how do i coordinate that when the groomsmen are from:"


axe them to go get measured locally then they can tell your there* size. If there* off a little, they can get altered when they pick them up

El Padrino said...

i used mw for my tuxes

El Padrino said...

ooo mens warehouse!!!

/beth
&
/meiz

El Padrino said...

why isnt aitch a groomsman?
afriad hed fuck your wife?

Keef said...

"i used mw for my tuxes"


They're the only place that carries kiddie tuxes

(s)

Keef said...

"why isnt aitch a groomsman?
afriad hed fuck your wife?"


he doesn't want a woedding

tem said...

"definitely go with the regular tie.

ns"

over the black pin looking thing? bowtie is definitely out.

tem said...

"more groomsman* just makes the wedding ceremony longer"

you know i had no real input as to the number of groomsmen i would be having.

Jugdish said...

how do i coordinate that when the groomsmen are from:

napoleon, nd
fargo, nd
devils lake, nd
columbus, oh
cedarburg, wi
pittsburgh, pa
shanghai, china


fixed

Jugdish said...

you know i had no real input as to the number of groomsmen i would be having.


just the beginning

tem said...

because H has lost too much weight and he'd make me look bad.

all my groomsmen are on 4,000 calorie a day diets from now until the wedding.

they'll get fat and i will look better by comparison.

that way i don't have to work out at all.

El Padrino said...

solid

El Padrino said...

"woedding"


winner

El Padrino said...

no serious mens warehouse

tem said...

oh i forgot. some place in her hometown is doing the tuxes....somehow.

i don't know how it is going to work. i just know that i get to pick out what the tux will look like.

assuming she likes what i pick.

tem said...

i'd rather her just pick it out, but i get it. she wants it to look like i had input.


just smile and play along.

El Padrino said...

just the beginning


this^

El Padrino said...

just smile and play along.


and this^

Jugdish said...

tem

El Padrino said...

i dont get how leno beats letterman in ratings all the time

just dont get it

El Padrino said...

murder by butter

Keef said...

tem is going to do the salad diet before the wedding, no?

El Padrino said...

i text cmep i have a doubleheader sunday, she text me back what does that mean

Keef said...

i dont get how leno beats letterman in ratings all the time

just dont get it





this

El Padrino said...

usually bitches diet before wedding to fit in dress, never the dude

Keef said...

Old people like Leno more, and more old people watch talk shows than younger petople

Jugdish said...

Old people like Leno more, and more old people watch talk shows than younger petople


^^^^^^

Jugdish said...

cock fight

El Padrino said...

"Old people like Leno more, and more old people watch talk shows than younger petople


^^^^^^"

i'd buy that if it were true

but it's not, leno beats dave in the 18-49 demographic too

it's a puzzling

tem said...

"tem is going to do the salad diet before the wedding, no?"

maybe.

Keef said...

"cock fight"

misleading

/lp

El Padrino said...

my cock would win in any fight

Keef said...

"it's a puzzling"


I read that like you were an 80 year old italian saying it

ns

tem said...

"but it's not, leno beats dave in the 18-49 demographic too"

young people leave their TVs on.

they watch NBC around 9pm.

then they go out and get drunk, but leave the tv on. or at least leave the cable box on. i know my cable box is on all the time. cable company probably thinks I watch cartoon network all day while i am really at work.

then they come home at 3am turn off the tv and go to bed.

El Padrino said...

well in any event, leno sucks

El Padrino said...

i need to make another 25-40K more a year

Keef said...

yes he's awful. colov

Keef said...

"i need to make another 25-40K more a year"


Not me, I'm pretty content where I'm at

s

El Padrino said...

wwl story on the fridge

solid

tem said...

so there is something on yahoo! saying about some military planes nearly hitting an american airlines plane.

they were 200 feet apart in altitude and "less than a mile" apart in horizontal direction.


so they weren't close, got it.

tem said...

"i need to make another 25-40K more a year"

we all do.

even blue.

Spaceman Spiff said...

"FisolaNYDN Frank Isola
Sources say that Jim Buss recently rejected a Bynum for Carmelo deal, much to the dismay of Kobe and Phil"

tem said...

el pad, lower the 10 year treasury.


thanks and regards.

El Padrino said...

"they were 200 feet apart in altitude and "less than a mile" apart in horizontal direction."


thats close up there

El Padrino said...

el pad, lower the 10 year treasury.


yes sir

Keef said...

"man some HDH in that post"


^

Jugdish said...

thats close up there

Jugdish said...

even blue.



need some petty cash

/blue

Blue said...

"thats close up there"

that's very insensitive to the men and women who lost their lives in 9/11


(s)

JFreak said...

"center from butler got fucked up"

matt howard's a balla.

JFreak said...

"over the black pin looking thing? bowtie is definitely out."

go with the skinny tie. they're so totally in.

JFreak said...

"i dont get how leno beats letterman in ratings all the time

just dont get it





this"

a thousand times this.

Jugdish said...

"i dont get how leno beats letterman in ratings all the time



i don't watch either one

El Padrino said...

"NFL players are covered for only five years after they retire"

damn, that doesnt seem right

El Padrino said...

"i don't watch either one"


just make sure your box is not on channel 4

El Padrino said...

"NFL players are covered for only five years after they retire"


im not covered at all

/meiz

Jugdish said...

im not covered at all

/meiz


chuckle

Jugdish said...

im not covered at all...i hate america!

/meiz


fixed

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

wwl story on the fridge

solid


^^^^^^^^^^^^^


in the middle of it now; had no idea about his alcohol struggle (ns)

El Padrino said...

fucking nuts, japan tv show

El Padrino said...

"in the middle of it now; had no idea about his alcohol struggle (ns)"


most blacks are alcoholics

/blue

El Padrino said...

This bad boy starts with a regular burger. No worries there. But nestled under the toasted bun and perched atop the pickle, lettuce, tomato, bacon and cheese toppings is a slab of ice cream coated in cinnamon and cornflakes that has taken a dip in the deep fryer for 10 to 15 seconds.

gross

Blue said...

awesome

tem said...

"thats close up there"


one time a plane was less than 4 feet away in verticle altitude from another plane.

of course it was 5 miles away.

not close.

Jugdish said...

one time a plane was less than 4 feet away in verticle altitude from another plane.


thunderbirds?


s

Blue said...

but they travel like 500 miles an hour so they could make up the 5 miles in like 30 seconds

tem said...

"NFL players are covered for only five years after they retire"


they make enough to pay for their own health insurance.

if they didn't blow all their cash on gold chains and big white escalades they'd be fine.

tem said...

"but they travel like 500 miles an hour so they could make up the 5 miles in like 30 seconds"


they were traveling in opposite directions.

tem said...

and at opposite verticle angles.

tem said...

so in 30 seconds maybe they were 4 feet apart horizontaly, but like 2.5 miles apart vertically (assume 45 degree angle)

Keef said...

"go with the skinny tie. they're so totally in."


with the gheys, yes

tem said...

i'm too fat to wear a skinny tie

Blue said...

my point being, when they were only a mile apart if they're headed at each other, that's like 10 seconds of response time.


a near hit

Keef said...

"just make sure your box is not on channel 4"

No, channel 12

Blue said...

no channel 9

Blue said...

the reason dave gets kilt by leno is that CBS has really shitty shows that lead into the news

tem said...

channel 7 or 10

tem said...

or 4 or 1010 or 1004 or 1007

Keef said...

"that's like 10 seconds of response time."


They're not 80 years old

El Padrino said...

have you ever flew a jet 600 mph?

El Padrino said...

oh you havent?

El Padrino said...

didnt think so

El Padrino said...

face

Blue said...

"They're not 80 years old"

how long does it take to make a jet move in a different direction?

Jugdish said...

Two trains 150 miles apart travel toward each other along the same track, the first train at 60 mph, the second at 90 mph. The first train leaves from The Burg at...

tem said...

"The first train leaves from The Burg at..."

how is traffic?

maybe it should leave later to get there sooner.

El Padrino said...

"A government investigation into Toyota safety problems has found no electronic flaws to account for reports of sudden, unintentional acceleration."

so what the fuck

tem said...

driver error

El Padrino said...

"Dolan in on Melo Talks"


dammit, it's never gonna happen now

Keef said...

"how long does it take to make a jet move in a different direction?"


Which direction is the wind blowing?

El Padrino said...

titans fired the cancer guy

Keef said...

Run, jug!

Keef said...

Don't move to UK, LP


(s)

El Padrino said...

where i really was last weekend

last leg of race

H said...

"i don't know how it is going to work. i just know that i get to pick out what the tux will look like."

You're making this tougher than it needs to be. I assume the groomsmen aren't all getting into town the day of the wedding right? They get measured locally by whatever tux shop they can find. Send you the measurements. You give those to the tux shop doing the wedding. When the groomsmen get into town, they try on the tux, and alter it if necessary. Not difficult, homeboy.

H said...

And yes, 200 feet vertically and less than a mile apart is quite close in aviation terms.

H said...

Ratards*

H said...

y'all argue with EP for the sake of it sometimes.

H said...

He's not ALWAYS wrong. Just most of the time.

Keef said...

"They get measured locally by whatever tux shop they can find. Send you the measurements. You give those to the tux shop doing the wedding. When the groomsmen get into town, they try on the tux, and alter it if necessary. Not difficult, homeboy."



Goddamn, I wish I would have thought of that and said it

Keef said...

"y'all argue with EP for the sake of it sometimes."

stop it

Blue said...

200 feet vertically is far

Keef said...

"200 feet vertically is far"

That's 34 and a half LPs

tem said...

"And yes, 200 feet vertically and less than a mile apart is quite close in aviation terms."

only because the aviation people tell you it is close.

tem said...

"Send you the measurements."

why would i want the measurements?

"You give those to the tux shop doing the wedding. "

which tux shop is doing the wedding?


"When the groomsmen get into town, they try on the tux, and alter it if necessary."

it is in the middle of nowhere ND. there is nobody there to alter anything. i'd have Jesus do it, but he'll be at the game.

Keef said...

"only because the aviation people tell you it is close."

your* just arguing with h for the sake of arguing

/h

Keef said...

the titty pads are getting used, tem

tem said...

and less than a mile apart is about 27 plane lengths away.

if i am ever in a car with H and he gets within 27 car lengths of another car I am calling his boss and telling the bossman that H had a near miss!!!


oh nooooooo!!!!! H almost killed me!!!! I demand payment!!!! No tip for you!

Keef said...

No tip for you!




story of my life.

/h

tem said...

that's probably why H never gets any good tips. he gets within 27 car lengths of other cars.

Blue said...

if h was traveling the rate of speed of a jet and was 27 car lengths away, you'd be scared



that would be a cool car though

Blue said...

"it is in the middle of nowhere ND. there is nobody there to alter anything."

you've never had a tux? They all have straps and crap to adjust for dudes...i'm sure tux shop in BFE has done it before

tem said...

"you've never had a tux? "

i have not

tem said...

i think the tux shop there is a lady who has a computer and can get on tiptoptux.com.

or ttux.com or something like that.

El Padrino said...

"it is in the middle of nowhere ND"

i read this as

I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO

El Padrino said...

cmep gets mad when i call bgep whiskey tango

Keef said...

"i think the tux shop there is a lady who has a computer and can get on tiptoptux.com.

or ttux.com or something like that."


have her order from tjokes

El Padrino said...

i hate powerpoint

Keef said...

why is bglp WT?

Keef said...

i hate when people talk about there* kids

/tem

tem said...

tjokes went under. something about a tax issue. IRS shut them down.

El Padrino said...

"why is bglp WT?"

cuz she hates bathing, keeps her hair unruly at times, hates when we wipe her mouth after eating which looks awful when all she eats is oreos, likes to walk around wearing tacky clothes and smokes pall malls

El Padrino said...

aja, im kidding i like to joke alot in case you didnt notice

cmep didnt notice yet, hello we are married fool i keed i keed

but bgep is nuts and sometimes she looks like a hot mess

hot mess = whiskey tango

Keef said...

"tjokes went under. something about a tax issue. IRS shut them down."

damn shame

Keef said...

smokes pall malls made me lol

El Padrino said...

louie ck had a great bit on his daughter in a 08 stand up i think

was hilarity, i feel him

extreme but i feel him

Keef said...

"hot mess = whiskey tango"

I have a sil like that

El Padrino said...

something about she was running around naked and then she drew him a dog and he was like this aint a fucking dog

great stuff

H said...

I gotta find some newer songs for NDR. What are the kids listening to these days?

El Padrino said...

"I have a sil like that"


bgep gets a pass cuz she's 3

sil, is wt 4 eva

El Padrino said...

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