Monday, January 31, 2011

No kid yet

Due date has come & gone and no hint of a baby. Hopefully it comes soon, I hate waiting. TWSS

Did anyone watch the golf tourney on Sunday? Phil fuckt* up again. Not only did he blow his 3rd round lead, but he kind of fuckt* up on 18. He was down 1 and the leader had about a 15 footer for birdie on the green. Phil was in the rough off the tee, but could of* reached the green. Instead, instead of waiting to see if dude makes his putt, Phil just lays up so there's no chance he can eagle. Then dude makes his putt and Phil is down 2 shots. If he would of* waited, he could have seen he was down 2 and would have gone for it. But instead he plays bridesmaid again. IN YOU FACE, MITTS!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Dook

Me & cmk were watching som SAG awards show last night and the cast of Modern Family won the award for best cast in a comedy. When the cast went on stage, I mentioned that I like Sofia Vergara. Cmk says "Why do you like all those Mexicans?" I say she's Colombian, then axe her what Mexicans I like. She thinks for a seconds and says "That girl from top chef". "Padma, the host chick"? "Yeah, her". "Yeah she's middle eastern, from India or something." "Oh. Well you like that chick from SNL". "Yeah, she's from Iran". Then she says "I dunno. You like Mexicans" then I say "Good talk, Russ".

Booooooo

Holy crap

If they played football in Hawaii and noone watched it, did it happen?

Goddamn softball ended tonight. We played a team that was winless on the season and we beat 39-4 in the first game of this season. They kicked our as. almost all game and we were loosing* 18-8 going into the bottom of the last inning. Of course, thanks to them dropping 3 easy fly balls and the ump giving us a makeup call on a play at 2B, we score 11 runs and win 19-18. And I got hit in the knee so there is a play golf ball sized knot on the inside of my knee. Woe. I'm done with goddman softball for a while.

Some questions for the class....
Does beth ever regret her temgagement?
Does jug plan on turning cgjwtf into femjug?
Does freak like girls or boys?
Is blue bummed he won't have any boys?
Is mize going to get a Breer's season ticket package this year?
Is tem going to move into femtem's place or is femtem going to move in to tem's place?
How much money is LP going to bet on the Super BowlTM, including prop bets?
Is spiff the coolest motherfucker on the planet?
Did kod & cmkod do some suite drugs in Maui?
Is aitch ever going to get a different yob?
Did anyone read this?

245 comments:

1 – 200 of 245   Newer›   Newest»
Beth said...

"Does beth ever regret her temgagement?"

Surprisingly no. In fact I'm more convinced today that I made the right decision than the day I made it. ns

Beth said...

And fair is fair so here's one for you keef:

Do you think cmk's sisters will be good aunts or stay true to their character and be crazy ones?

tem said...

Fmtem is moving into my place.

tem said...

I bet exfembeth regrets it then

El Padrino said...

theres an iranian chick on snl?

El Padrino said...

"Fmtem is moving into my place."

cant wait for this shit to not work

/meiz

El Padrino said...

fuck dook

El Padrino said...

"But instead he plays bridesmaid again"

isnt 2nd place like quarter mil

El Padrino said...

"How much money is LP going to bet on the Super BowlTM, including prop bets?"

probably around $300, light

El Padrino said...

saw the other guys all the way through, ok probably better next time

El Padrino said...

"Do you think cmk's sisters will be good aunts or stay true to their character and be crazy ones?"

hsielp is a good aunt but has no regard for my house when she watches her and teaches her silly things

Blue said...

i'm a peacock, you gotta let me fly

El Padrino said...

what is the internet

El Padrino said...

gator dont play no shit!

El Padrino said...

i guess wall

El Padrino said...

The government of Malawi plan to punish persistent offenders 'who foul the air' in a bid to 'mould responsible and disciplined citizens.'


no farting in africa

Keef said...

"Do you think cmk's sisters will be good aunts or stay true to their character and be crazy ones?"


Probably along the line of what lp's sil does. I think they'll be good aunts, but I will try to make sure if they ever babysit that it's over at one of their places & not ours because they will destroy this place

Keef said...

"theres an iranian chick on snl?"

yes

Keef said...

her

Keef said...

"Surprisingly no. In fact I'm more convinced today that I made the right decision than the day I made it. ns"


Because of fembeth or because you'd rather be single?

tem said...

probably because of new lawyer(s)

Beth said...

"Because of fembeth or because you'd rather be single?"

Because I haven't had any real regrets or find myself missing him like I thought I would. But it did take me a little bit after the breakup to like being single again, but it's kind of nice now.

Beth said...

And yeah, the new lawyerS haven't hurt either. They give nice expensive gifts.

s

Spaceman Spiff said...

i am not outkast

Spaceman Spiff said...

lakers suck

Keef said...

"isnt 2nd place like quarter mil"


probably, but he already has more money than God

Jugdish said...

Does jug plan on turning cgjwtf into femjug?


initial talks have started, but gonn let her play out the last year n her contract and go from there

Jugdish said...

Surprisingly no. In fact I'm more convinced today that I made the right decision than the day I made it. ns


good deal!

Keef said...

it's raining

Blue said...

"initial talks have started, but gonn let her play out the last year n her contract and go from there"

are you going to have to offer her arbitration?

El Padrino said...

make sure you put a no juvorce clause in there

Keef said...

maybe the new contract should not include a no sexy time clause

El Padrino said...

wish we can negotiate contracts with each other

sex incentives, anniversary roster bonuses

Jugdish said...

are you going to have to offer her arbitration?


i could franchise her

Jugdish said...

make sure you put a no juvorce clause in there

^^^^^

Jugdish said...

maybe the new contract should not include a no sexy time clause


and that ^

Beth said...

"wish we can negotiate contracts with each other"

I like this idea. Women know they just have to get you guys worked up and you'll agree to anything to seal the deal. So negotiations could be done in a couple hours with a six pack late on a Friday night and you'd have no idea what you agreed to until the next morning and saw what you'd signed.

Jugdish said...

So negotiations could be done in a couple hours with a six pack late on a Friday night and you'd have no idea what you agreed to until the next morning and saw what you'd signed.


i have a two pack right now

/Lp

Beth said...

I think a 2 pack in NYC equals a 6 pack everywhere else. It's science, right?

Spaceman Spiff said...

"wish we can negotiate contracts with each other

sex incentives, anniversary roster bonuses"

become rich and you can negotiate with your second wife, not the sex stuff but that would be implied, just let it be known no sex will lead to earlier divorce which means less roster bonuses accrued

Blue said...

everything's bigger in Texas

El Padrino said...

where did

how do you like them apples

came from

Spaceman Spiff said...

the bible says WWI

Keef said...

"So negotiations could be done in a couple hours with a six pack late on a Friday night and you'd have no idea what you agreed to until the next morning and saw what you'd signed."


maybe h's girl can send me his 6-pack

/LP

Keef said...

"where did

how do you like them apples

came from"




duh. Good will hunting.

/h

Keef said...

I like craisins

tem said...

"probably, but he already has more money than God"

God has no money. So yes, he does have more money than God.

tem said...

"So negotiations could be done in a couple hours with a six pack late on a Friday night and you'd have no idea what you agreed to until the next morning and saw what you'd signed."

when Kod reads this he will remind you that a contract signed while drunk is not enforceable.

tem said...

"where did

how do you like them apples

came from"

ymsoab

Blue said...

""where did

how do you like them apples

came from""

snow white?

El Padrino said...

WW1

Spaceman Spiff said...

padfast

Blue said...

i think he was verifying that spiff was the correct winner

El Padrino said...

yes

El Padrino said...

keef, feed cmk spicy food

baby will slide out next day

El Padrino said...

has to be agressive spicy too
no gay taco bell shit

El Padrino said...

take her to good mexican place so you can gawk at the woman*

Jugdish said...

check their papers too

Jugdish said...

wall

Blue said...

all they have in AZ is Tex-Mex

Blue said...

like Chevy's

El Padrino said...

az has some real deal stuff

Spaceman Spiff said...

"The SPCA is launching an investigation following a report that a dogsled tour company in Whistler, B.C., ordered the killing of 100 dogs when bookings slumped after the Olympic Games in Vancouver.

The man who shot 100 sled dogs and filed a Workers Compensation claim stating he suffered post traumatic stress is not getting much sympathy from the head of the BC SPCA cruelty investigations division.
"

vick would have went to canada instead of hawaii if he knew about this vacation

AJA, couldnt sell or give them away?

Spaceman Spiff said...

"Kevin Durant explained the mix-up with Chris Bosh in the first half: “I’m a quiet guy, a laid back guy. But I’m not going to let nobody talk trash to me. He’s on a good team now so he thinks he can talk a little bit. But it’s a lot of fake tough guys in this league and he’s one of them.” "

tim thomas is disappointed durant didnt drop a 'fugazy' there

Blue said...

kenyon martin thinks Chris Bosh is fugazy

El Padrino said...

anyone in a high stake box pool?

El Padrino said...

bosh is a joke yo

for real

gonna get ass raped in the playoffs

tem said...

"anyone in a high stake box pool?"

like the squares for the super bowl?

tem said...

i have 3 and 3.

fmtem has 2 and 2. I don't think she will win.

Keef said...

"keef, feed cmk spicy food

baby will slide out next day"


She had Taco Bell yesterday

Keef said...

"has to be agressive spicy too
no gay taco bell shit"


ha, didn't see this comment

Keef said...

"take her to good mexican place so you can gawk at the woman*"


fuck yeah

Keef said...

"bosh is a joke yo

for real

gonna get ass raped in the playoffs"



I'll dap that dude

/mize

tem said...

he would not dap him. he only daps grienke.

El Padrino said...

"like the squares for the super bowl?"

yes

contemplating splitting a $1000 box with friends

tem said...

dap? what does the even mean? /lp

tem said...

it was 2,500 per square for the one fmtem and i are in. i don't even know the payouts.

tem said...

oh wait, not $2,500.

it was $25.

El Padrino said...

dap? what does the even mean? /lp

fist bump

Blue said...

damn tem is balling

Keef said...

"contemplating splitting a $1000 box with friends"

jesus

Keef said...

"fist bump"


not the one mize does

Jugdish said...

I'll dap that dude

/mize


hilarity

Beth said...

"contemplating splitting a $1000 box with friends"

Jesus, things really are more expensive in NYC. I sell mine for a lot less than that.

s

tem said...

a wink a flower and a hundred bucks?

Keef said...

I have a high stake box thing going on right now

tem said...

cmk sent me a card. i don't think she liked the nipple guards.

El Padrino said...

"contemplating splitting a $1000 box with friends"

jesus

no he's not one of them

Keef said...

"cmk sent me a card. i don't think she liked the nipple guards."


She told me as she was writing it, "I think I'm just gonna say thanks for the gifts. I don't want to say thanks for the breast pads"

tem said...

ha

tem said...

i got other gifts too. couldn't pass up breast pads. plus nobody else would buy them for her.

El Padrino said...

tims has a good story on grooming lb's like the sillirs do

El Padrino said...

need a T vanna

El Padrino said...

rodgers

Keef said...

"i got other gifts too. couldn't pass up breast pads. plus nobody else would buy them for her."

Yeah she was thankful for them. She just didn't know she'd be getting them from a stranger

tem said...

i met her once. i'm not a stranger now.

tem said...

just a strange person she met. not a stranger.

El Padrino said...

firday night lightish

man the times is on fire today

El Padrino said...

"PHOENIX — Weeks after a shooting left six dead and 13 injured in Tucson, New York City sent undercover investigators to an Arizona gun show and found instances in which private sellers sold semiautomatic pistols even after buyers said they probably could not pass background checks, city officials said."

wild wild west

Keef said...

yes, AZ is very gun friendly

El Padrino said...

gee ya think

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

"contemplating splitting a $1000 box with friends"


yeah, I pushed last year, so this years' $1500 box is on the house


I've done ok with that box deal; one push, one $500 win, and one total loss

tem said...

i don't even know who that is

El Padrino said...

you pushed?

tem said...

anyone know how to renew a passport?

El Padrino said...

there are no pushes

tem said...

i think my odds on my box are -160. they have to be right?

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

you pushed?



yeah, it was a fucking miracle (at least it felt like it at the time); the last 5 minutes of last years SB was the most exciting gambling moment I'd had in a few years

El Padrino said...

"anyone know how to renew a passport?"

dont ask me i need an eye test

El Padrino said...

tem:

Renew by Mail if All of the Following are True:

Your Most Recent U.S. Passport:

Is undamaged and can be submitted with your application

Was issued when you were age 16 or older

Was issued within the last 15 years

Was issued in your current name or you can legally document your name change

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

there are no pushes


+1/-1 at the half or end of game is a push in the box I am in. +2/-2 at the end of the 1st and 3rd quarters is worth $1000

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

the +2/-2 used to be worth $500 (which is what I won during the 2003 SB)

El Padrino said...

so if you have a box and your numbers are 1 packers, and 1 steelers and at halftime its 21-21 you dont win anything?

you "push"

El Padrino said...

that's psycho box

El Padrino said...

tem

i should check to see when mine expires
ns

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

so if you have a box and your numbers are 1 packers, and 1 steelers and at halftime its 21-21 you dont win anything?

you "push"



YS, C?

no, you would win $50,000. If it was ending in 0-0 or 2-2 you would push. Cmon ep, you of all people should follow

El Padrino said...

you said "+1/-1 at the half or end of game is a push in the box I am in."

so i thought push if ends in 1

El Padrino said...

nerve heard of pushes in a square box pool, i am perplexed

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

but of course, a push isn't like you get your money back...just a free box for the next SB (in my case, this one next week)


box is out of NYC; only tricky part about winning is having to drive to CM and carry all the cash back

El Padrino said...

FEDERAL JUDGE RULES INDIVIDUAL MANDATE IN OBAMA HEALTH CARE LAW IS UNCONSTITUTIONAL.

face

Blue said...

i will box you

/aitch

El Padrino said...

"box is out of NYC; only tricky part about winning is having to drive to CM and carry all the cash back"


nonsense I'll pick it up for you

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

well, if I win a biggie (half or game), we'll party like rock stars for a night in NYC on the winnings

El Padrino said...

good lord a party with you with a lot of cash would be legendary

tem said...

thanks for passport info. i need to renew mine. it expires in february.

El Padrino said...

i'd wake up in a seedy midtown hotel with a sore ass, empty lysol cans, a few broken fingers, coors light puke and cat piss all over me

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

not unfunny

Blue said...

where are you going for the honeymoon?

wedding is in ND, you headed to Toronto or something after

tem said...

wedding in ND, probably hit up Purdue for the honeymoon.

Blue said...

the bank we use for operations failed on Friday.

FDIC is all up in their bullshit.

May have cost us a boughtload of money because FDIC only insures up to 250 or some shit.

tem said...

aja, thinking about hawaii. one of her family friends has given her siblings use of a time share there for their honeymoons.

or carribean (hence my need to eventually renew my passport).

tem said...

"May have cost us a boughtload of money because FDIC only insures up to 250 or some shit."


^^^^

tem said...

"the bank we use for operations failed on Friday."

major suck. much condolences.

El Padrino said...

that sucks blue
not good

Blue said...

we had an inkling it was coming, so we were carrying very little excess cash in there, but rent and payroll was due on the first so we had put a bunch in there.

fuck the FDIC.

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

one thing I liked about HI (at least where we were at) is that it is very safe, you don't need a passport, travel visa, inoculations, and are not surrounded by depressing 3rd world levels of poverty

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

I've only been to two other tropical places (Puerto Rico and Cabo) but Maui was about 1000X better than either of those places IMO

Blue said...

HI kicks anywhere in Mexico's ass

Blue said...

just takes forever and a day to get there

El Padrino said...

"one thing I liked about HI (at least where we were at) is that it is very safe, you don't need a passport, travel visa, inoculations, and are not surrounded by depressing 3rd world levels of poverty"

you know hawaii is part of The United States right?

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

just takes forever and a day to get there


^^^^^^^^^^^^^


yeah, the travel part (especially home) is rough (ns)

tem said...

so is wava

tem said...

no walls

tem said...

well, maybe later, but not now.

H said...

"thanks for passport info. i need to renew mine. it expires in february."

You are the anti-EP

tem said...

thanks

tem said...

i guess.

H said...

Your* welcome

H said...

cghwf is pisst* at me again. I'm all done with her BS.

El Padrino said...

when do they expire anyway 10 years?

El Padrino said...

"cghwf is pisst* at me again. I'm all done with her BS."

what'd you do fuck her mom?

H said...

"what'd you do fuck her mom?"

No. she was complaining about the discounted tix to the show I posted on Facebook. Said they were uselesss cuz she didn't have a printer. I replied it was a good thing she has fucked a member of the band and can get in for free. She was not amused.

Beth said...

"I replied it was a good thing she has fucked a member of the band and can get in for free."

So you called her a whore, got it.

s

H said...

Lucky for me I have a couple new prospects.

H said...

No, Beth, I reserve that for you baby. ;)

El Padrino said...

;)


can you stop this shit please

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

Did kod & cmkod do some suite drugs in Maui?


a good buddy of mine we met up with there and I were offered "Maui wow-ie" outside the Luau in Lele from someone on a bike; we figured he was a narc and walked away

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

but....we did bring a bunch of tincture with us in our carry ons and had no problems; it was kind of funny dropping THC from our seats on the planes

El Padrino said...

mmm poppy seed bagels

El Padrino said...

piece leaving early

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

the whole "which NFL team is America's Team" debate has always annoyed me.


"America" doesn't have a team; stop trying to nationalize everything. Freakin' democrats

H said...

"can you stop this shit please"

Stop the HDH, I'll stop the smileys.

H said...

"mmm poppy seed bagels"

Enjoy the failed drug test.

H said...

S

tem said...

"when do they expire anyway 10 years?"

yes

tem said...

". I replied it was a good thing she has fucked a member of the band and can get in for free. She was not amused."

if you know she is nuts then it is your fault for texting her this.

with her track record you knew she'd take this poorly.

if you want to keep fucking her you gotta just say very little to her.

tem said...

you know this shit H.

H said...

"if you know she is nuts then it is your fault for texting her this."

Said it in person, actually.

H said...

"you know this shit H."

I know. I think fucking the same girl for 2 years has really affected my game.

H said...

It's like a bball player. Guess I need to hit the gym and practice my free throws

Keef said...

"anyone know how to renew a passport?"

Let it expire then show the immigration folks your PBA card

/LP

tem said...

indeed.

i need to literally work on my hoops game. been playing on sundays. i am horrendous. george karl would not approve.

H said...

Still no baby, Keef??

H said...

"george karl would not approve."

But would your hikeschool* coach let you play?

Keef said...

"aja, thinking about hawaii. one of her family friends has given her siblings use of a time share there for their honeymoons."


getting someone else's time share for the honeymoon is HDH

ns

Keef said...

"Still no baby, Keef??"


negative. She's at work

H said...

"negative. She's at work"

Jebus* dude. How long 'til they induce?

tem said...

"But would your hikeschool* coach let you play?"

the hike school coach when i was there? no.

the hike school coach there now? hell no. he is a douche. we do not get along. mostly because my uncle never writes anything good about him (my uncle writes for the paper).

tem said...

no wall

H said...

That was definitely a wall.

tem said...

wall

Keef said...

"aja, thinking about hawaii. one of her family friends has given her siblings use of a time share there for their honeymoons."



My only advise is to try to go to another island besides Oahu. If I had to do over again, AHIK*, I wouldn't have done Honolulu.

Keef said...

"Jebus* dude. How long 'til they induce?"


Her do* date was only yesterday. They don't induce til like a week after that. She goes to the vagina doc tomorrow and they'll schedule a date

tem said...

i have no idear which island the time share is on.

Keef said...

I meant to put a * by advise

tem said...

* is old skool now. just go hdh without the *

Keef said...

that's called LP

H said...

"* is old skool now. just go hdh without the *"

But then it just looks like you EP'ed it instead of doing it on purpose.

H said...

Double dragon!

tem said...

we all know it was done on purpose if it is as. writing it.

Keef said...

double dragon is the best

H said...

Never thought me and Keith would have a double dragon

H said...

Must be a slow news day. They are talking about a coyote sighting in Brookline.

tem said...

i forgot my book for church class. oh well.

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

If I had to do over again, AHIK*, I wouldn't have done Honolulu.


that's what a lot of the Maui natives said; they didn't like Honolulu because it was more of a big city than the tropics

Blue said...

oahu sucks

kauai is the best

maui a close 2nd

big island is different with the active volcanos and tons of lava rock

H said...

I'll nerve* see Hawaii I don't think. Can't fly for that long.

Spaceman Spiff said...

you dont have to go to honolulu if you go to oahu

Spaceman Spiff said...

"I'll nerve* see Hawaii I don't think. Can't fly for that long."

O:FB

Spaceman Spiff said...

bold

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Top Of The Page Material:

"Idiots with nothing better to do"





"Most Boston sports fans are just douchebags. Because most people from New England are douchebags." - tem





"Obama got elected because of the Rooney rule" - Jug





"you should never let debt stop you from pro-creating anyway" - El Padrino





"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H





"i'm dumb and sensitive. basically i'm a woman" - L Padrino





"I'm so horny this morning. If there wasn't this sex offender list going around id grope bitches on the train this morning" - L Padrino