Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Mailbag

Time for another mailbag. As always these are questions from actual readers, ETEO.


Why are MBAs pretty much basically useless in the workplace? -Every Non MBA with a job

Because all they do is group work and they never learn to think for themselves. They are taught that every task needs completed by a group so that you don't miss a possible angle or a possible road block. While it is wise to gather info from many sources before you make a decision it isn't wise to have 10 people make a 1 person decision. All that does is make the final result way more complicated, time consuming and costly than it needed to be.

For example, this guy and work and I get to go to Vegas for some convention in February. He goes to Vegas all the time and knows all about what hotels are near which ones. Our conference is at the Wynn, but the Wynn rooms are too expensive. So his task was to find a cheaper place next to the Wynn. He called me about 10 times during the day asking me about different rooms and whether or not Hotel whatever was close enough. He knows I have no idea whether or not it is close enough, but his MBA ass is trained to ask me. Wasted a bunch of my time and his. He finally booked us at Treasure Island.


Why do you take commercials so literally? -fmtem

It's true, I do take commercials literally. It drives me nuts when the food in Taco Bell commercials has no bites taken out of it even though the commercial is making crunching chewing sounds and the Yankees manager is taking the kid out and putting in Rivera to finish the job even though the kid never even taken a bite out. You need long relief for that, not the closer.

Anyway, I take it seriously because sometimes I am an as.hole.


Why does Natalie Portman look uglier than she used to? -tem

A combination of age and getting knocked up. Also now that she is established she doesn't have to try as hard. I am starting to think that maybe she isn't just naturally mega-hot. I think she worked hard to craft the "I am mega-hot" image and look and now that she doesn't need it anymore she doesn't work as hard at it.

Having said that she still is pretty damn hot and seems to be a smart kid. I wish good things for her.


Should I bail on my Matty Ice crush and move on? -beth

If you think he is winning a Super Bowl anytime soon you are wrong. He's a solid QB, but not elite /lp. If when you are going to town on yourself or some dude is going to town on you and you want to fantasize about a Super Bowl champ you should just think of Steve Young or something because it ain't happening soon for Matty Ice.


Have you seen True Grit yet? - Bob in Nebraska

No. Is it better than Grease 2?


Do you know where you are going for your honeymoon? -everyone in my office

No. The wedding is like 10 and a half months away. We don't know where we are going yet.


Do you make any temgagement jokes to fmtem? -all of lov

No. My rule for temgagement jokes is that only I can make them and I won't do it if fmtem is around. So none of my friends can make them (of course that rule does not apply to the blog). They are pretty cool with it because in real life its a harder joke to make that it s on here.


When Carmelo ends up a Net will anyone notice if I start rooting for them? /lp

Yes. If you change teams everyone will make fun of you. Even more fun of you than they do now. I know you say you'll never be a Nets fan, but when they are rocking Brooklyn and winning games and doing Russian Mark Cuban things you'll start to go to some games and you'll start to root for them and we will make fun of you.

I just beat the shit out of a pop machine because the price went up twenty five cents, that's normal right? - H

Not for most people. You should look into taking some karate classes or something. Have mr. Myagi teach you how to deal with the inner demons. Wax on, wax off, kick some Cobra Kai ass. Or find a hooker. You are much more calm when you are getting laid on a regular basis.

216 comments:

1 – 200 of 216   Newer›   Newest»
Blue said...

she can dream of aaron rodgers

Blue said...

I have an MBA

I choose to not have group decisions, i just make a decision and then if it's questioned I say, "oh yeah, well who has the MBA here, me or you"

Blue said...

considering i'm the only one in the office with an MBA, i win all arguments

Blue said...

although the marketing director has a masters of something degree, she almost wins sometimes

Blue said...

that's how awful our company is, there are 2 people total who have advanced degrees in the entire company.


unless you count "CPA" as an advanced degree, which nobody in the world does, and you shouldn't put on your email signature.

tem said...

tem does not put CPA on his email or his card.

tem said...

"that's how awful our company is, there are 2 people total who have advanced degrees in the entire company."


i am not sure we have more than that.

tem said...

aaron rodgers was banging erin andrews...or so i read here once.

tem said...

any email i send to blue will have CPA in it though. maybe multiple times.

Jugdish said...

aaron rodgers was banging erin andrews...or so i read here once.



he likes big noses

Jugdish said...

blue works for Kramerica

Blue said...

tem has an advanced degree

Blue said...

does associates degree count as advanced


/lp

tem said...

kraft makes some sort of baked mac n cheese now. anyone try that shit?

is it cheap like regular mac n cheese or are they charging a lot for it?

tem said...

i just counted.

we do have 4 people with advanced degrees.

El Padrino said...

mba's are overrated

everyone knows this, even people with MBA's

tem said...

i don't think everyone knows it.

El Padrino said...

having a PSD is better

poor smart deep desire to be rich

tem said...

wouldn't that be psddtbr?

tem said...

coincidentally that is the sound one makes when motor boating


psddtbr psddtbr psddtbr psddtbr

El Padrino said...

only the first letter need be on the acronym

tem said...

so just P?

El Padrino said...

i was having this stupid bar argument the other day that you dont pluralize Shrimp

i ate 50 shrimps

sounds wrong so i was saying you just say i ate 50 shrimp

im right, right

El Padrino said...

so just P?

no, first letter of last word i meant

Blue said...

i've heard shrimps and shrimp...both ways

tem said...

"no, first letter of last word i meant"

so just R?

Blue said...

according to merriman's both shrimp and shrimps is correct

tem said...

"sounds wrong so i was saying you just say i ate 50 shrimp"


i concur

El Padrino said...

"no, first letter of last word i meant"

so just R?


POOR

SMART

Deep (first letter of last word)

hence PSD

look it up, Ace Greenberg

tem said...

merriman is a girls name.

tem said...

so the first letter of all the words except the ones at the end?

poor
smart
deep
desire
to
be
rich

tem said...

poor smart deep sounds 2 of 3 things beth looks for in a guy.

Blue said...

if you're smart, you're not poor

that's kind of an oxymoron

tem said...

i thought it was that if you were smart and poor then you were choosing to be poor.

El Padrino said...

some people cant afford to pay for school and are smart i think was the main point he was trying to make

tem said...

is Ace Greenburg related to Mike Greenburg?

Blue said...

not having schooling doesn't keep you from being rich

tem said...

not having money does

El Padrino said...

i guess define poor, middle class people sometimes say they are poor though they know nothing of truly being poor

El Padrino said...

sometimes people with MBA's have no common sense

El Padrino said...

when people say shrimps

they sound retarded
jus sayin

tem said...

"sometimes people with MBA's have no common sense"

this is true

tem said...

"define poor"


your face is poor

El Padrino said...

good defintion

tem said...

it seemed like a good "your face" moment.

El Padrino said...

great final four left for nfl

giddy

El Padrino said...

cuse lost yesterday
they really missed joseph but pitt is tough

El Padrino said...

and the fact that rex coached in baltimore gives him a huge advantage preparing for this big one

Spaceman Spiff said...

big ben wont be ducking whilst in the pocket and steelers will get calls

Blue said...

fuck cutler

El Padrino said...

but did the great belichick or great brady make any adjustments at all sunday

run some rub routes, double moves, draws

i saw none of that

Blue said...

did you see bert trying the xnij for the packers

or maybe it's just a straight jinx.

i don't know, i'm not colombo

Blue said...

they ran double moves, just that they didn't work...they showed one sequence where they tried a couple double moves and both cromartie and revis didn't bite, not even an inch.

it's like they knew the route the guy was running better than the reciever did.

Blue said...

plus, you have to have time in the pocket to run a double move...not a lot of time for statue of bradity back there

tem said...

"big ben wont be ducking whilst in the pocket and steelers will get calls"


i am guessing at least 3 roughing the passer calls. helmet to helmet or hitting him high or whatever calls.

El Padrino said...

i think brady had alot of time, i mean there were plays where he didnt but he patted that ball for lik 5 seconds on multiple plays

i only saw one replay of the double move which like you said didnt work they must have seen that on tape

El Padrino said...

no doubt rex outcoached cheater

tem said...

skunkpatch was talking about how brady was patting a lot.

Blue said...

i guess that's true...i do remember brady sitting back there and guys just never getting open.

they'd show the WR running around all covered up for a long ass time

Blue said...

but that's what happens when you have shitty recievers

El Padrino said...

they didnt blitz as much for certain, the nose tackle ellis had a monster game

it's huge to get pressure without blitzing, that's how giants beat them

El Padrino said...

but that's what happens when you have shitty recievers

^ this

not even the welker plays worked where he studders once off the line then darts underneath

safety help on that too i noticed, they sat him in the boz not for the run cuz they have no running game but for those west coast style dink and dunk passes that produce yac for the offense

masterful cornerback play

El Padrino said...

they marched first drive i was like famn this is over

then he threw that horrendous pick

Beth said...

"Should I bail on my Matty Ice crush and move on? -beth"

Silly tem, my crushes on pro athletes have little to do with winning a championship. It's more about if they are cute and if they are rich (but not necessarily in that order).

Spaceman Spiff said...

pats got beat down, but with all that, they still had a chance

horrible pick
algae* drop TD
fake punt debacle
close on the 1st onside kick

steelers romp, sanchize back to shamchize

Blue said...

fake punt debacle was hilarity

Blue said...

so was the play that belicheck challenged early in the game.

way to blow that one too genius

El Padrino said...

besides all that spiff they jets had a chance to really blow out with two fumbles not recovered

El Padrino said...

that santonio catch was redonk

El Padrino said...

is there a gif of the green Bay kicker getting his ankles broken on the weems KO return?

El Padrino said...

fake punt debacle was hilarity

^

El Padrino said...

sanchize stinks alot but has some great throws at the right time when they need it

El Padrino said...

to beat manning, then brady and now AHIK beating ben

on the road

would be somehting i cant ignore and would be jealous of

jet fans gave gmen props for 07 run, i have to do the same

we'll see, steelers are toughest D the sanchize will face, pats d not good and colt d is basically two guys

El Padrino said...

i like the 630 start
the field weill probably be shitty

Keef said...

TMNEPT

El Padrino said...

i remember whitlock calling out manning for throwing his o line under the bus one year i wonder if he'll take ray lewis to task for calling out the o

El Padrino said...

too much ep talk
find another blog

Keef said...

"too much ep talk
find another blog"



your* really good at reading

El Padrino said...

i guessed wrong i guess

Keef said...

you left out a letter

El Padrino said...

nancy

El Padrino said...

obama sucking chinese cock this week

El Padrino said...

FEDS: Data from 120,000 iPad users stolen...

Keef said...

wall

Jugdish said...

Berkman, who'll be 35 next month, has been primarily a first baseman the last four years but has dropped 20 pounds in preparation for a return to the outfield.



did he cut out tequila?

El Padrino said...

A Panama-based liquor company is producing whisky in a can.

Scottish Spirits suggests splitting it between three people, because it's the size of a regular beer can. Seriously: it's twelve ounces, or eight shots worth of whisky.


good tip

Keef said...

just the tip

Blue said...

yep, if J-E-T-S Jets jets jeTS win this weekend.

winning @Indy, then @New England, then @Pittsburgh...that's very impressive.

Blue said...

*aliik

Blue said...

*asiik?

Jugdish said...

handle this keef

Keef said...

i don't climb fences anymore

El Padrino said...

i cant argue with these fools about melo

he's top 5

they say hes not
all of a sudden the knick fans who were sleeping for 10 years wake up with an opinion on melo

El Padrino said...

i would take melo over wade all day long

all day long

Blue said...

melo is only a scorer.

that's the thing everyone has to understand.

he doesn't rebound (much), he doesn't play defense, and he doesn't pass the ball.

but he can fill it up.

Blue said...

he's bernard king

Blue said...

or dominique wilkens

El Padrino said...

i know this, and i know the value a guy like melo can bring

and i want it

El Padrino said...

melo 8 boards a game is aight

El Padrino said...

wade 29, melo 26

tem said...

tem 33

Blue said...

temwr87

El Padrino said...

a team with melo and stout in a system like dantoni's would be sick

especially with a felton coming along he was not used properly under larry brown which happens alot

Spaceman Spiff said...

"First baseman Prince Fielder and the Milwaukee Brewers have avoided salary arbitration by agreeing to a $15.5 million, one-year contract."

Keef said...

"he's top 5"


You are so fucking high

Keef said...

this whole video crap with Rodgers walking past that chick and not signing her hat is fucking ratarded

El Padrino said...

"According to Adam Rubin of ESPN New York, the Mets and Mike Pelfrey have avoided arbitration and agreed to a one year deal.

Rubin says the deal will pay Pelfrey approximately $4 million, after he earned $3.3 million in 2010."

bargain for both mets and brewers

El Padrino said...

"he's top 5"


You are so fucking high"


you dont even watch basketball

El Padrino said...

i wanna talk about peg bundy and the hot ass cougar she is now

Keef said...

"you dont even watch basketball"


Right. Which should tell you about how high you are

El Padrino said...

who is naya rivera?

El Padrino said...

melo is top 5

opinion, mine

Keef said...

DISALLOWED!

Keef said...

"who is naya rivera?"


apparently she's in glee

tem said...

peg bundy was a cougar 20 years ago. how is she still a cougar?

seriously, how old was she when she did married with children?

Keef said...

she looks a lot better now than when she was on MWC

Keef said...

she definitely doesn't look like she's 56

Keef said...

she turns 57 tomorrow. jeezaloo

Keef said...

she was 33 when MWC started

JFreak said...

"kraft makes some sort of baked mac n cheese now. anyone try that?"

It's good.

El Padrino said...

apparently she's in glee

^fuch* this shit

El Padrino said...

god damn id bang a 57 year old

ugh, but damn she was smoking on the awards

El Padrino said...

i'd bang a 87 year old

/aitch

Blue said...

I'd bang an 87 year old...only if my friend had banged her first

/aitch

El Padrino said...

brooklyn decker


oh man

Blue said...

rams shouldn't want mcdaniels anyway...he'd try to trade away bradford for Orton

Blue said...

or tebow

Spaceman Spiff said...

blue your boy

maroney mugshot

weapons and drug charges

Blue said...

heard that on the radio today...

broncos gave up a 4th rounder for that loser

El Padrino said...

awful

El Padrino said...

my god blue, what a nightmare mcdaniels set the team back years

El Padrino said...

the more highlights i see of griffin the uglier he gtes

Blue said...

yeah, it's insane

cutler, hillis, scheffler, marshall, alphonso smith, Robert Ayers, trading a shitload of picks for Tebow, Demaryius Thomas over Dez Bryant....

the hits just keep on comin

El Padrino said...

he zeke'd the broncos

i know the feeling

Blue said...

sometimes I think he was just Lane Kiffining things...saying 'fuck it, i'm going to try and kick a 70 yard fg'

El Padrino said...

fox is solid, that's a start

Spaceman Spiff said...

high school 'shooting' over here, gardena high, not columbine style though

black kid brought a gun in his backpack and it went off when he dropped it, 3 kids shot, dont think anyone died

Spaceman Spiff said...

"-28 oz. can whole peeled tomatoes(San Marzano style)
-5 Tbsp. unsalted butter
-1 medium-sized yellow onion, peeled and halved
-Salt to taste

Put tomatoes, onion and butter in a heavy saucepan over medium heat. Bring the sauce to a simmer then lower the heat to keep the sauce at a slow, steady simmer for 45 minutes. Stir occasionally, crushing the tomatoes against the side of the pot. Remove from heat, discard the onion, add salt to taste."

made this sauce the other day, easiest shit ever, was awesome. people on worst cooks in america can make it

tem said...

"black kid brought a gun in his backpack and it went off when he dropped it, 3 kids shot, dont think anyone died"

i guess i am not edumuncated on guns, but how did dropping it cause it to fire at least 3 times?

fucker must have been an automatic, no?

Keef said...

i'd bang a 87 year old, then I'd bang her daughter and granddaughter, then I'd axe her great-granddaughter to text me a pic of her nipples

/aitch


*fized

tem said...

"i'd bang a 87 year old, then I'd bang her daughter and granddaughter, then I'd axe her great-granddaughter to text me a pic of her nipples. but only after my friend slept with them.

/h


*fixedfized

Keef said...

ha

Keef said...

what a scumbag


s

tem said...

h is a class act. i am an h fan.

tem said...

ns

tem said...

it is ok to make fun of him though because he is from boston.

Keef said...

my comment had an s at the end

tem said...

nobody said it didn't

Keef said...

AA

Keef said...

where are you going on your honeymoon?

tem said...

maybe hawaii. but we aren't sure yet.

Keef said...

BTW, Treasure Island is alright. A little WT, but not as bad as Excalibur. And it's right across the street from the Wynn. Plus, they have a pirate show every night on the water.

tem said...

after a wedding in ND we might go to rome to continue the Jesus theme.

tem said...

" Plus, they have a pirate show every night on the water."

pirates are cool

queue butt pirate jokes

Keef said...

I think they have War at TI

Keef said...

queue. Nice

tem said...

"A little WT"

i'll fit in. my buddy will not.

Keef said...

Yeah, wasn't saying it like it was a bad thing. WT places are usually more fun

Keef said...

have your bach party in Vegas

El Padrino said...

sauce with no garlic or basil is blasphemy

san marzano's are the shit though

Keef said...

tem, tax question. I was working on ours last night and I entered bolth my yobs, our house stuff, student loan interest, and work deductions and had a decent number for a return. Then I entered cmk's W2 and it cut the refund in half. Not sure why because she has a lot of taxes taken out during the year. If we filed separately would we get the same number or does it not work like that?

El Padrino said...

i can't wait for this answer
suspense is killing me

tem said...

" If we filed separately would we get the same number or does it not work like that?"

if you filed separately there is a very high probability that you would get less refund for the fed or the same amount. for your state taxes you could get more, i have no idea about AZ taxes.

tem said...

"Then I entered cmk's W2 and it cut the refund in half."

that is odd. she must have pushed you to a new bracket. or pushed you into a situation where you lost some credits. my guess is a combo of both.

without her salary you qualified for a bunch of poor people credits. then you didn't with her salary plus you got bumped to a higher bracket.

tem said...

fed tax law rarely encourages people to file married filing separate.

it is possible though that it could work in your favor though. just pretty unlikely.

the only way for you to really figure it out is to use the program and file both ways.

Beth said...

EP will like this article, it's all about why Matt Ryan is over-rated.

And honestly, I think it makes some good points.

tem said...

"the only way for you to really figure it out is to use the program and file both ways."


i mean try it both ways. don't file both ways. that'd be bad.

tem said...

so SI says lance is a mega cheater?

freak is sad.

El Padrino said...

i like it beth

Spaceman Spiff said...

"Matt Ryan is over-rated"

mat ryan, matty piss ice, or natty ice will do

El Padrino said...

piece

Jugdish said...

"Matt Ryan is over-rated"



where is he currently rated?

Keef said...

"that is odd. she must have pushed you to a new bracket. or pushed you into a situation where you lost some credits. my guess is a combo of both.

without her salary you qualified for a bunch of poor people credits. then you didn't with her salary plus you got bumped to a higher bracket."


Ok cool. Thanks. It did say we get some work tax credit for $800, which is nice

Keef said...

"mat ryan"


hilarity

Spaceman Spiff said...

"McDaniels to Rams as offensive coordinator is now a done deal."

Keef said...

Singletary to coach Vikings LBs

Keef said...

FACE, LP!

Keef said...

A spokesman for the Los Angeles Unified School District reportedly told local news outlets that the shooting was accidental. District spokesman Robert Alaniz said the gun was brought to school in a backpack and went off when the student dropped it -- injuring the two victims with a single bullet.

Keef said...

"I've never heard of anything like this before," said Thomas Hill, whose 16-year-old and 18-year-old children attend the school. "You're going to have confrontations between kids but never this."



RT, R?

Spaceman Spiff said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Spaceman Spiff said...

ravens D coordinator left to D coordinate at Michigan

Mize said...

I want braids like Larry Maroney

Mize said...

"i love how meiz is an expert ice fisher"

Me too

Keef said...

Ohio State will not lose any underclassmen to the NFL draft this year, coach Jim Tressel confirmed today.
The NFL will officially announce Wednesday which juniors are declaring for the draft. This will be the first year since 2003 that OSU does not lose a junior to the NFL.



suite

Keef said...

whiskey tango

Mize said...

Jeebus

The Agony of Defeet* said...

"You are much more calm when you are getting laid on a regular basis."

TWHNBS

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

"she must have pushed you to a new bracket. or pushed you into a situation where you lost some credits. my guess is a combo of both.

without her salary you qualified for a bunch of poor people credits. then you didn't with her salary plus you got bumped to a higher bracket."


-This is what happened to cmkod and me when we got married; totally blows. We went from getting a good amount back from taxes every year to paying in.

The Agony of Defeet* said...

"fake punt debacle was hilarity"

Belichick won't confirm it, but local sports yaks have been saying that Chung actually audibled into the fake himself. Stupid, stupid, stupid decision.

The Agony of Defeet* said...

"I'd bang an 87 year old...only if my friend had banged her first"

Erroneous on both counts.

The Agony of Defeet* said...

"h is a class act. i am an h fan."

Thanks tem!

Jugdish said...

the gym was crowded and i had bad gas...not a good combo.

The Agony of Defeet* said...

That sucks.

The Agony of Defeet* said...

I've been slacking about going tot he gym the last few weeks. Ate like crap, etc. Finally went today and somehow I lost 3 more pounds. How the hell did that happen?

Mize said...

I always feel like a caveman because I have an aol email account. Then I look at our fantasy leagues and remember that Tyler has an earthlink account.

Jugdish said...

at least its not compuserve

The Agony of Defeet* said...

Earthlink is definitely old skewl*

Mize said...

"at least its not compuserve"


Or Prodigy

Jugdish said...

couldn't think of prodigy...dammit.

Jugdish said...

bold

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Top Of The Page Material:

"Idiots with nothing better to do"





"Most Boston sports fans are just douchebags. Because most people from New England are douchebags." - tem





"Obama got elected because of the Rooney rule" - Jug





"you should never let debt stop you from pro-creating anyway" - El Padrino





"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H





"i'm dumb and sensitive. basically i'm a woman" - L Padrino





"I'm so horny this morning. If there wasn't this sex offender list going around id grope bitches on the train this morning" - L Padrino