Monday, January 10, 2011

Hide yo kids, hide yo wife

By now everyone should of* seen the video on YouzTube, but if you haven't (AHIK*), look up Antoine Dodson on YT. And if this is keeffast, well fuck you.

And now before I go any further, HAHAHAHAHAHAHA rev!!! Beth, sorry your team has to play the Packers, but even you would probably admit that it's worth it to see Philly go down like a ton of bricks. I like being insufferable at rev's expense. WADR. Now all we need is the Pats & Jess* to lose, and the playoffs will be a ::borat voice:: great success!!!

Why does it have to be a ton of bricks? I think a hundred pounds of bricks would fall down pretty hard.

So last week wasn't a grate* week for AZ. First some dude shoots up a mall and then runs over to Baja Fresh because he thought it was the border. Everyone knows that Taco Bell is the border. Der. OMJ. Then another dude shoots up a political meeting at a grocery store and kills* a state representative. I'm not leaving the house ever again. AZ already looks like a fuckt* up state to the rest of the country (world), so this shit probably won't help its image. This is good people, though.

In case everyone didn't already know, freak won the college bowl pick 'em. There's gonna be a big sock hop in Indy next weekend to celebrate.

I think there is an award show next Sunday, (AHTIK), so if there is I will do a running diary. I know there are a few coming up because it seems like all or most of them are in January & February. I would try to talk cmk into doing one, but she is hating life right now so that would probably get me a ::go fuck yourself::. And then I would.

Softball update. Played 2 games, won 1, lost 1. The one we lost was against a team that had to forfeit against us a few weeks back because noone on their team showed up. But the league said that it didn't count because they didn't tell the team that they had a game, which is bullshit. So we didn't get a win for that, and had to play them tonight and lost. Fucking woe is right. ****Attention whore alert**** Went 7-9 on the night which lowered the avg on the season to .800.

Go comment.

269 comments:

1 – 200 of 269   Newer›   Newest»
Beth said...

Man, what a night, I got a full 7 inches.

Of snow that is (yeah, I went with the obvious joke). No work for me today, woo hoo!

Todd Packer said...

"Of snow that is (yeah, I went with the obvious joke). No work for me today, woo hoo!"


this might explain why i can't get in touch with anyone in our atlanta office

Eli is NOT elite said...

my boss has the exact name as the fed judge killed

Todd Packer said...

h, pats are gonna kill the jets, but i'll still make the standard bet with you... let me know

Eli is NOT elite said...

7 inches and no work

fucking suite i need to move

Eli is NOT elite said...

"New Day Rising is now following you on Twitter!"

suite.

my life is really awesome right now

Todd Packer said...

the dallas green connection was strange

Todd Packer said...

ep, you wearing your jets gear today?

Eli is NOT elite said...

shut up packer

Eli is NOT elite said...

"By now everyone should of* seen the video on YouzTube, but if you haven't (AHIK*), look up Antoine Dodson on YT. And if this is keeffast, well fuck you."


this shit S right?

tem said...

atlanta got snowed one twice already this winter. that's like a record for them.

7 inches in ATL would be the equivalent of 6 feet in Bemjidi. ATL is shut down.

ftemsil's day care cancelled on sunday because it was supposed to snow on monday, so ftemsil gets to skip work and hang with ftemn.

Eli is NOT elite said...

7 inches is like rain here

although, 2 feet shut us down pretty good last time, we still had work and shit and the market didnt close so business as usual i guess, just couldnt get around

Eli is NOT elite said...

i ♥ itlaian pastries

Eli is NOT elite said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA rev!!!

^ this shit right here

Eli is NOT elite said...

Now all we need is the Pats & Jess* to lose,

jess* first

Eli is NOT elite said...

im giddy for ravens/steelers

H said...

"h, pats are gonna kill the jets, but i'll still make the standard bet with you... let me know"

Nice xnij. But yea, I'm in. Final Y! line.

H said...

"suite.

my life is really awesome right now"

You're kind of a dick sometimes. Just sayin'

H said...

i ♥ canolies cuz they resemble dongs*

*Fixed

Eli is NOT elite said...

"You're kind of a dick sometimes. Just sayin'"

is everyone who clowns you a dick or just me and keef

H said...

Mostly you and Keef

Eli is NOT elite said...

i see

H said...

but mostly keef.

H said...

And you know you're a dick. I thought you rejoiced in it.

Eli is NOT elite said...

well a dick is certaintly better than a douchebag

tem said...

of course you like dick better

Eli is NOT elite said...

seems like the Biggie line rings true for the Reed family

either you have a wicked jumpshot (or in this case, play in the NFL) or sling the crackrock (reed's bro)

Eli is NOT elite said...

never a good idea to run from police, especially if your black

double especially when your only choice is to leap into a river, again, especially if your black

Eli is NOT elite said...

"of course you like dick better"

i waited 20 min for that joke

Eli is NOT elite said...

With Josh [McDaniels], we went out on a limb [in terms of giving the coach lots of powers] and not only did it not work, it turned out to be sort of a disaster.''

burn

Spaceman Spiff said...

congrats on that #1 seed though beff

Spaceman Spiff said...

vick put the season on the line for a jump ball to an inexperienced scrub, on the replay you can tell scrub didnt think ball was coming his way

Eli is NOT elite said...

and he rocks a ponytail

game over

Spaceman Spiff said...

who the fuck was that guy, desean, maclin and avant shouldve been the only true WR out there, rev should be pissed

Eli is NOT elite said...

'All I can tell you is that this person may have a mental issue,' Dupnik said.

gee ya think

sidenote, like the discovering of a mental problem is relevant right now

same thing with Cho and the columbine, etc.

Spaceman Spiff said...

busted the fryers cherry with some wings then made some parmesan truffle fries, those were awesome

Eli is NOT elite said...

"who the fuck was that guy, desean, maclin and avant shouldve been the only true WR out there, rev should be pissed"

Riley Cooper, a packer apostle from Gator country

Spaceman Spiff said...

just used truffle salt, no truffle oil, that stuff is amazing

Eli is NOT elite said...

"busted the fryers cherry with some wings then made some parmesan truffle fries, those were awesome"

nice

had a mexican feast sat for some peeps for my bday, killer reviews for my tomatillo salsa and made some of those puffy tacos from that throwdown

Eli is NOT elite said...

the puffy tacos were incredible

Eli is NOT elite said...

just used truffle salt, no truffle oil, that stuff is amazing

^

did you know that truffle oil is not even made from truffles

rip off

Eli is NOT elite said...

instead they like infuse aromatics of truffles and call it truffle oil, i was so upset i vowed to never buy it again

Spaceman Spiff said...

good info

Eli is NOT elite said...

the salt is hdh

Eli is NOT elite said...

restaurant week later this month

Spaceman Spiff said...

rev change your pic

Eli is NOT elite said...

"No! I won't pay debt with a currency that's not backed by gold and silver."

goillum harps on this shit all the time, i think i should wear a bullet proof vest to work going forward

Eli is NOT elite said...

ha

Eli is NOT elite said...

eagles havent won super bowl in like 40 years

Eli is NOT elite said...

and that really dont count because pre-merger/super bowl era

Eli is NOT elite said...

super bowl in indy next year

get healthy colts

/freak

Eli is NOT elite said...

if manning hits White on that 3rd down, they win

ahik

Spaceman Spiff said...

before


after

Spaceman Spiff said...

if manning doesnt get collie concussed all year, they win




(freak alarm clock)

Harry and Lloyd said...

"2 feet shut us down pretty good last time, we still had work and shit and the market didnt close so business as usual i guess, just couldnt get around"

So it didn't shut you down. Got it

Spaceman Spiff said...

what did you fill the puffy tacos with

Harry and Lloyd said...

"eagles havent won super bowl in like 40 years

and that really dont count because pre-merger/super bowl era"



So they've nerve* won a super bowlTM. Got it

Harry and Lloyd said...

40 years is funny considering we're on something like Super BowlTM 48

Harry and Lloyd said...

maybe 44

Mize said...

"either you have a wicked jumpshot (or in this case, play in the NFL) or sling the crackrock (reed's bro)"


bass ackwards

Mize said...

"before


after"


Awesome. 2 minutes into round 1.

Eli is NOT elite said...

"what did you fill the puffy tacos with"

ground beef mixture with chorizo

Eli is NOT elite said...

"40 years is funny considering we're on something like Super BowlTM 48"

im normally not exact in these type of statements, point is they havent won in a long time

Eli is NOT elite said...

when i go to costco i sometimes lose my mind trying to remember how much i pay for things in the supermarket to determine if im getting a deal

because i look down in my cart and within 10 minutes ive already got $150 worth of stuff and it's like 8 items, sometimes i feel ripped off

need a rainman brain to figure it out

Eli is NOT elite said...

whats handy is the price signs showing the per ounce price or any of the smaller price points

Eli is NOT elite said...

more chorizo then beef on that ratio

sauteed with onions and green olives

Eli is NOT elite said...

olives are the worse

/keef

tebow who gagged me said...

didn't they win a superbowl with vermeil or did they just get to the superbowl

Eli is NOT elite said...

onions are the worse

/meiz

Eli is NOT elite said...

"didn't they win a superbowl with vermeil or did they just get to the superbowl"

losers, shellacked by Oakland

Eli is NOT elite said...

cmep boat* me an xbox

Spaceman Spiff said...

whitlock

H said...

"cmep boat* me an xbox"

Suite*

Eli is NOT elite said...

freak's gonna hate that whitlock

Mize said...

"onions are the worse

/meiz"


My onion opinion depends on the application.

Mize said...

"cmep boat* me an xbox"


Recover your gamertag, Black Ops. Do it.

Mize said...

I'm thinking about getting FIFA 10 so I can work Freak over like a sock.

Eli is NOT elite said...

"My onion opinion depends on the application."

i used to be like you with the onions, now i eat them all the time, just not raw

nothing worse than a raw onion

H said...

"nothing worse than a raw onion"

Agree to disagree

H said...

I wouldn't bite into a raw onion like an apple or anything, but some uncooked onions on a hot dog or burger is HDH

Eli is NOT elite said...

"Recover your gamertag, Black Ops. Do it."


have yet to see it, lets hope its the right one

Spaceman Spiff said...

or taco

Eli is NOT elite said...

'"I wouldn't bite into a raw onion like an apple or anything, but some uncooked onions on a hot dog or burger is HDH"

yeah not a fan

Eli is NOT elite said...

salsa, guac

raw onion ok

Eli is NOT elite said...

why did nbc choose falcons/pack

Mize said...

"I wouldn't bite into a raw onion like an apple or anything, but some uncooked onions on a hot dog or burger is HDH"


^^^^^^^^^^^^^^


But I have to have said onion cut to my specs. I don't like crunching into chunks of onion.

Mize said...

I have certainly seen people eat onions like apples. Fucking disgusting.

Mize said...

"have yet to see it, lets hope its the right one"


There's a wrong one?

H said...

Meiz might be the most finicky (sp?) dude ever. Just sayin'

Mize said...

"Meiz might be the most finicky (sp?) dude ever. Just sayin'"


Not really. People make it out to be a big deal. Like, if I'm at a gathering and there's food that I don't care for or has stuff in it I don't like, I'll just eat plain stuff or not really eat. No big deal, but someone's always gotta make a point to point out that I don't like what's there to eat. If I'm not trippin' on it why should anybody else?

Mize said...

That's what bugs me. I'm cool, I just don't care for the food. No offense.

Eli is NOT elite said...

"There's a wrong one?"

gigs, to stream netflix
plus she bought it from not a store so she doesnt even have it yet

she only told me because i ruined the surprise

Mize said...

Based God bless CC Sabathia.

/watching 40 greatest Breer's moments.

Mize said...

I see I'm in my proper standing in GOLF PICKS already

Eli is NOT elite said...

are you sick or you worked the weekend

Eli is NOT elite said...

front page of drudge report

kind of looks like you andy

Mize said...

"are you sick or you worked the weekend"


Off today because of wisdom teeth/work this coming weekend.

Mize said...

I could be be at work, but I'd rather not be.

Mize said...

I need a different game to play on Live.

Mize said...

Tiger 12 and the new baseball game need to hurry up & come out

Eli is NOT elite said...

"Off today because of wisdom teeth/work this coming weekend."

you're off for dental work you're anticipating?

the fuck is that shit

Mize said...

I can't stand Paula Deen

Mize said...

"you're off for dental work you're anticipating?"


Are you retarded?

I work this coming weekend. Had teeth removed on Friday.

Eli is NOT elite said...

Nets close again to melo

Mize said...

Pretty much a done deal

Eli is NOT elite said...

Are you retarded?

no

I work this coming weekend. Had teeth removed on Friday.

then you should said put a period after wisdom teeth instead of /work this weekend

it read like you should said had dental work this past weekend

Mize said...

Doug Melvin can't read for shit.

Eli is NOT elite said...

I can't stand Paula Deen

can't stand the Neely's

Mize said...

I hate whites, you hate blacks.

Makes cents

Eli is NOT elite said...

billups wants nothing to do with the Nets

Eli is NOT elite said...

i hat ethem because they act like horny teenagers not becuase they black

Harry and Lloyd said...

"olives are the worse

/keef"


all day long

Harry and Lloyd said...

it read like you should said had dental work this past weekend



^^^^^^^^^^^^^

H said...

mmmm. chicken stir fry wrap. Green peppers and onions. Meiz's worse* nightmare

Eli is NOT elite said...

"mmmm. chicken stir fry wrap. Green peppers and onions. Meiz's worse* nightmare"

no, im cool with it
as long as they are cut to my specifications

/meiz

Eli is NOT elite said...

i have too many kids

Harry and Lloyd said...

"He had marched the Eagles 39 yards in one minute and then, on first and 10 from the 27, he inexplicably lobbed a floater down the sideline to Riley Cooper"


he marched them? 1 pass was like an 8 yard pass to Desean Jackson and he ran it 20 more yards. And then he almost gets Celek kilt and the Eagles get a 4th timeout. WFT is that shit? They should at least run 10 seconds off the clock. Getting the clock stopped on an injury, with zero TOs left, and then not having it start back up until the next play starts is ratarded

Eli is NOT elite said...

seahawks cheated

tebow who gagged me said...

"Getting the clock stopped on an injury, with zero TOs left, and then not having it start back up until the next play starts is ratarded"

clock was stopped because of the incomplete pass...if it had been a running clock, they would have given them the 10second run off.

Harry and Lloyd said...

"clock was stopped because of the incomplete pass"

ha, I'm a fucking retard

Harry and Lloyd said...

i'm gonna go sit in timeout

Eli is NOT elite said...

im not a huge fast food guy but everytime i eat Wendy's it's awesome

Mize said...

"no, im cool with it
as long as they are cut to my specifications

/meiz"


Green peppers a no-go in all applications.

tem said...

"like you should said had "


ymsoab

H said...

"Green peppers a no-go in all applications."

:shaking head:

tebow who gagged me said...

what about red peppers?

Mize said...

"what about red peppers?"

Same.

Mize said...

""Green peppers a no-go in all applications."

:shaking head:"


They're nasty. Bitter or some shit.

Eli is NOT elite said...

russians ans spanish people love talking in thier other language to each other even though they speak english

dont get it

H said...

Peppers (all colors) = HDH
Mushrooms = horrific

H said...

colov

Eli is NOT elite said...

green peppers are an abomination
red peppers are at least suite

Mize said...

If you lived elsewhere, you wouldn't speak English?

H said...

"dont get it"

I think all ethnicities do this. I know Portagees do

Eli is NOT elite said...

"If you lived elsewhere, you wouldn't speak English?"

its a tad rude, dont know maybe i would

H said...

"its a tad rude, dont know maybe i would"

Causes a lot of static amongst my family actually. I think it is indeed rude if the people involved in the conversation all speak English.

Eli is NOT elite said...

“So would my brother. My brother would want us to beat Pittsburgh.”

smh

Eli is NOT elite said...

"Causes a lot of static amongst my family actually. I think it is indeed rude if the people involved in the conversation all speak English."


just always have an overdding feeling that we're being talked about

that's insecure i know

H said...

"just always have an overdding feeling that we're being talked about

that's insecure i know"

Yup, same feeling the non Portigese speakers married into my family get. Often not the case, but sometimes it is. Valid concern.

Eli is NOT elite said...

do you actually know how to spell Portuguese or you just fucking around here

cuz that's some hdh twice

Eli is NOT elite said...

that ed reed hit was wonderful

Eli is NOT elite said...

judy clark defending the arizona killer

Eli is NOT elite said...

man getting shot in the head must really suck especially if you live

Harry and Lloyd said...

"man getting shot in the head must really suck especially if you live"


that was a chance they were willing to take

Harry and Lloyd said...

"do you actually know how to spell Portuguese or you just fucking around here

cuz that's some hdh twice"

You know it's real bad when LP calls you out

Harry and Lloyd said...

I had to google what smh was

H said...

second time was a typo. First time was the racial term we get called. You get called a ginny or a wop. I get called a portagee (port-a-gee). Probably shouldn't have assumed you all knew that. Probably odn't hear it unless you are in an area that has a lot of Portuguese people.

Harry and Lloyd said...

how do the chefs* not throw 1 pass towards Bowe?

H said...

"man getting shot in the head must really suck especially if you live"

Did the 8 year old kid who was killed at a gun show here last year make national news? The guy who organized the gun show is on trial now. They showed the video during the trial. That shit was disturbing.

H said...

Kid pulls the trigger and the recoil forces the gun up, his arm bends at the elbow, and you can imagine the rest.

Harry and Lloyd said...

ginny is grate

Harry and Lloyd said...

"Kid pulls the trigger and the recoil forces the gun up, his arm bends at the elbow, and you can imagine the rest."


So he shot it twice?

H said...

oh I'm sorry. I forgot to mention it was a fully automatic mini-uzi. so he pulled the trigger once and it happened very quickly.

Harry and Lloyd said...

link plz


s

H said...

Ginny. Guinea. Whatever.

H said...

I'm sure spiff will link it by the end of the day.

H said...

Video

Safe for work. They stop it right before it hits the kid. About the 1:40 mark

Spaceman Spiff said...

portagee is used in hawaii, instead of polack jokes, they have portagee jokes over there

Spaceman Spiff said...

people who speak english well but as a 2nd language like to speak their original language probly because they can express things better, shit can be funnier, more slang, more sayings, in their arsenal, etc etc

Eli is NOT elite said...

yeah i guess

tem said...

"how do the chefs* not throw 1 pass towards Bowe?"

watch sunday's game, that's how.

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

"Getting the clock stopped on an injury, with zero TOs left, and then not having it start back up until the next play starts is ratarded"

""clock was stopped because of the incomplete pass...if it had been a running clock, they would have given them the 10second run off.""

-but they got an extension of time on the play-clock; I think they should still run off 10 seconds...Philly did get an advantage there they wouldn't have otherwise gotten had they had any timeouts left

H said...

"-but they got an extension of time on the play-clock; I think they should still run off 10 seconds...Philly did get an advantage there they wouldn't have otherwise gotten had they had any timeouts left"

Yes, but they do this all the time. Not a big deal IMO

tem said...

you think they should run the play clock down if there is an injury on an incomplete/out of bounds/other clock stopping thing?

Mize said...

Somebody send me the p30x

Mize said...

"I had to google what smh was"


smmfh

I'll Show You How to Pitch said...

"you think they should run the play clock down if there is an injury on an incomplete/out of bounds/other clock stopping thing?


yep, exactly


-because it just encourages people to fake injuries otherwise. Take the Philly game; they would have had to burn a timeout there or take a 5 yard penalty EXCEPT FOR the fact they were out of timeouts.

Eli is NOT elite said...

i want w-2 now i need to know

tem said...

"i want w-2 now i need to know"

isn't all the info on your last pay stub of 2010?

tem said...

"-because it just encourages people to fake injuries otherwise. Take the Philly game; they would have had to burn a timeout there or take a 5 yard penalty EXCEPT FOR the fact they were out of timeouts."


i see your point. i don't really care either way though. can't get excited about the rule either way.

Eli is NOT elite said...

"isn't all the info on your last pay stub of 2010?"


then what

Eli is NOT elite said...

i know that already

tem said...

all they do is put the info from that stub onto a w-2.

so you know all the numbers that are going to on a w-2.

tem said...

so what the hell do you need to know?

H said...

"-because it just encourages people to fake injuries otherwise."

RK, R?

Eli is NOT elite said...

i wanna do my taxes, cant do them without w-2

tem said...

you can do them without a w-2, you just can't send them in yet.

Harry and Lloyd said...

"you can do them without a w-2, you just can't send them in yet."


you can if it's done online, no?

Harry and Lloyd said...

"smmfh"


smmfc

Harry and Lloyd said...

that's great it starts with an earthquake, birds & snakes & aeroplanes

Eli is NOT elite said...

i just want a #, waiting on other tax docs too

Eli is NOT elite said...

i should do wage works

Harry and Lloyd said...

We used Turbo Tax last year and were gonig to this year, but last week there was an H&R Block At Home Deluxe in our mail addressed to another name at our address, I don't know who it is. So I was going to use it, but is it the same as Turbo Tax?

Eli is NOT elite said...

i used turbo tax every year

Harry and Lloyd said...

Yeah I like turbo tax, but if the H&R block shit is the same, it'll save me $50 buying turbo tax

tem said...

"you can if it's done online, no?"

not sure. don't think so. i think you need some codes from the w-2 that aren't on your last pay stub.

i think.

tem said...

"i just want a #, waiting on other tax docs too"

if you just want a # you can use the info from your last pay stub to get a close estimate of your refund or amount do*

Harry and Lloyd said...

"i think you need some codes from the w-2 that aren't on your last pay stub."


OIC. Makes cents

Eli is NOT elite said...

i think.


i know

tem said...

"H&R Block At Home Deluxe in our mail addressed to another name at our address, I don't know who it is. So I was going to use it, but is it the same as Turbo Tax?"

basically the same thing.

only issue will be that turbo tax will remember your prior year info if you used it last year, which comes into to play sometimes.

the HR Block stuff will not remember the info and you'll have to tell it.

then next year when they don't send the HR Block stuff to you again and you go back to turbo tax you'll have to tell turbo tax about the HR Block year.

tem said...

not a hugh issue though. probably about 1hr total extra work for the two years and you save like $40 or whatever turbo tax costs these days.

H said...

"which comes into to play sometimes."

HDH

Harry and Lloyd said...

"only issue will be that turbo tax will remember your prior year info if you used it last year, which comes into to play sometimes."

Yeah, I was thinking about that. Usually in order to esign you have to have the previous year's gross income # or something like that. Maybe that'll be on the turbo tax cd I have from last year

Mize said...

I'm about to trade Mike Redd for David Lee & Charlie Bell

Harry and Lloyd said...

"I'm about to trade Mike Redd for David Lee & Charlie Bell"



WAIT!!!

tem said...

did you keep a hard copy of your return from last year? you probably should do that.

Eli is NOT elite said...

. "Maybe that'll be on the turbo tax cd I have from last year"

you didnt print last years return?

Eli is NOT elite said...

DOUBLE DRAGON

Harry and Lloyd said...

"did you keep a hard copy of your return from last year? you probably should do that."


I don't know off the top of my head. I'm thinking no

Harry and Lloyd said...

bold

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