Monday, June 14, 2010

I hate

First of all, I hate Boston
I hate everything around Boston
I hate New York City Metro Area
I hate Philadelphia
I hate Los Angeles
I hate Michigan
I hate Cleveland
I hate all teams around those cities
I hate that Toddlers & Tiaras show that cmk watches
I hate that South Africa is thinking about banning those vulva trumpet things
I hate that ESPN & MLBN can't stop talking about Strasburg for 1 minute
I hate Kendry Morales
I hate softball night on this team
I hate that this immigration law is still being protested
I hate that athletes can't go to a strip club without getting in trouble. Jesus, act like you've seen tits before
I hate people that can't back out of a parking spot. They're 15 feet away from the car behind them but they act like they're 2" away, then they have to pull forward, back up, pull forward, back up, etc etc etc. FUCK!
I hate that rappers always gotta have beef
I hate 2-3-2 setups in Finals' series. The team with home court advantage gets that taken away for 1 game, basically. Give the higher seed the 5th game at home. Who cares if there's another day off. Don't schedule 4 days off in between games in the 1st round
I hate that mize doesn't know what a suicide squeeze is
I hate when I can't figure out a simple electrical issue in my house, and have to axe someone I work with and then feel like an idiot when I find out how to do it
I hate that you all can't see the picture of rev playing softball. He's swinging at the ball, but looking about 10 feet in front of the ball. It's the better
I hate getting sunburn
I hate monsoon season
I hate when people visit and bring their pets with them
I hate one of my yobs*. Not the nighttime one
I hate when I have to take a shit after I shower in the morning
I hate that Lady Antebellum song
I hate when my dog jumps up on the bed when I'm asleep and steps on my nads
I hate that our garage is only clean enough to park 1 car in it
I hate when pitchers have a no hitter going into the 9th and the announcers break out the jinx montage of videos of past no-nos of the current year or most recent of that team
I hate when guys get a hit to break up a no hitter in the 9th inning
I hate that I'm not a MLB player or umpire
I hate Star Wars, obviously
I hate people that dress up as movie characters when they go to the movie or go to a convention
I hate that I can't go to the LoV union in Atlanta
I hate time limits. Why you gotta rush me?
Aaaaanddddddd IIIIIIIIIII, hate everything about youuuuuuuuu (s)

Go comment

328 comments:

1 – 200 of 328   Newer›   Newest»
Beth said...

I'm baaaaaackkkkk.

Actually, I went on a much needed mini-vacation Thursday til Sunday down to Key West with a friend. I didn't realize Jug you were announcing the Atlanta switch on Thursday or I'd have mentioned my being gone from LOV.

Beth said...

But to all of those wondering how I feel about the switch to Atlanta, I am all for it. I was actually quite flattered Jug even considered the switch, much less pulled the trigger. The Key West trip was part of the reason I couldn't afford the Chicago trip (as well as the fact that I don't know the roofie bars in Chicago).

Now if I can just figure out some way to convince mize to bring his sister along...

El Padrino said...

you wont need her, now that i know you'll be there like Mike Jackson said

I'll be thereeeeeeeee oh I'll be thereerereee

El Padrino said...

keef is a crumudgeon (sp?)

El Padrino said...

"I hate New York City Metro Area"

you lie!

El Padrino said...

serious and troubling question

wtf happens if boston wins?
i'm scared and nervous

does it mean O:FB is over?

help

El Padrino said...

is O:FP really stronger? like are the lakers sucking ass because kobe went to hike* school in PA?

Beth said...

"I'll be thereeeeeeeee oh I'll be thereerereee"

Wait, is it too late to change my mind?

El Padrino said...

"Wait, is it too late to change my mind?"

What? Wait, your not feeling this?

I'm just thinking about our life together.

I feel like I'm on a cloud.

My penis is tingling.

Beth said...

You may want to have a doctor look at that.

BLUE said...

ugly kid joe reference....blue gets it

BLUE said...

blue hates his computer because it has some shitty virus that keeps pooping on his fun.

BLUE said...

it keeps opening up porn websites....this is awesome

El Padrino said...

i did it

BLUE said...

it's very unoriginal...it goes to porno.com

Steve said...

"My penis is tingling."

you should see a Dr, i little penicillin can clear that right up

Steve said...

"it keeps opening up porn websites"

sounds more like a feature than a virus

kod said...

nice post Keith

I see you caught last week's Tosh.0 too, eh?

kod said...

hilarity

I love The Whitest Kids You Know

kod said...

"I hate that South Africa is thinking about banning those vulva trumpet things"


really? I'm in favor it of....big time

El Padrino said...

mad annoying those horns

tem said...

vulva horns gets a blank stare from me

El Padrino said...

how was wava

kod said...

if you watch a WC match, you'll hear a constant annoying loud buzzing sound that does not stop at all during the game

the sound comes from those vulvas

tem said...

wava was good.

spent about 3hrs with the family.

just the right amount of time not to freak cgtif out.

tem said...

no road head

tem said...

that part was bad.

kod said...

"I hate that I can't go to the LoV union in Atlanta"

-me too; we ended up planning a trip down to the cities for a big family get together that weekend.


woe

kod said...

and here I had high hopes I would get to share a bed with Meiz (s)

kod said...

Hey Blue, instead of a bet on the Twins/Rockies series, do you want to bet just on Thursday's game? Jiminez v. Liriano? 3 days name/pic?

El Padrino said...

Gregg Zaunbie Nation 0-12-0


how's my ass taste meiz

El Padrino said...

kod feeling frisky

El Padrino said...

I hate 2-3-2 setups in Finals' series.

this^

kod said...

"kod feeling frisky"

I can't wait; Thursday pitching duel, and Friday's duel on the pitch (USA! USA! USA!)



-I can hear ya'll growning at that one from here

kod said...

"Buoyed by recent public opinion polls suggesting they're on the right track with illegal immigration, Arizona Republicans will likely introduce legislation this fall that would deny birth certificates to children born in Arizona - and thus American citizens according to the U.S. Constitution - to parents who are not legal U.S. citizens."

Um, I'm no constitutional scholar, but the 14th amendment says: "all persons, born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States." There might be an argument about the meaning of "and subject to the jurisdiction thereof", except for the fact that the US Supreme Court has continually held that children of non-citizens born in the US are citizens.

So AZ, you're going to need to do more than introduce a bill; you're going to have to get 2/3 approval in Congress to amend the 14th Amendment....best of luck with that

kod said...

also, thanks and regards for ensuring Dems will get the Latino vote for years to come

H said...

"So AZ, you're going to need to do more than introduce a bill; you're going to have to get 2/3 approval in Congress to amend the 14th Amendment....best of luck with that"

Yea that won't go far at all.

El Padrino said...

Lebron James Looks At Penthouse In New Luxury Development In Brooklyn

H said...

Kobe was a BEAST in the 2nd half last night. Too bad he didn't get any help or they would have easily won.

H said...

"Lebron James Looks At Penthouse In New Luxury Development In Brooklyn"

Must be getting ready to sign with the Nets.

(S)

El Padrino said...

tem, vulva noise

El Padrino said...

college football looks a lil gross if texas goes to pac 10

Spaceman Spiff said...

congrats H, mine* as well post my name/pic, no way the lakers win 2 in a row

no way

Spaceman Spiff said...

bynum had 1 rebound in 32 minutes, pretty sure dj mbenga could have done that

El Padrino said...

nice reverse jink*

H said...

"congrats H, mine* as well post my name/pic, no way the lakers win 2 in a row

no way"

*swimming past the bait*

H said...

"bynum had 1 rebound in 32 minutes, pretty sure dj mbenga could have done that"

He is showing a lot of heart by playing, but I think Phil has gotta do something else. He clearly can't contribute on that bum knee.

tem said...

"growning"

new word i take it

tem said...

"Lebron James Looks At Penthouse In New Luxury Development In Brooklyn"


wow, and i heard he preferred Playboy.

tem said...

"no way the lakers win 2 in a row

no way"

going for the xnij i see

El Padrino said...

shakira shakira

tem said...

did beth make sexy time with her friend in key west?

and i am shocked nobody asked for pictures yet.

Beth said...

People know by now I'm not a LOV picture posting type of gal.

tem said...

so?

tem said...

you are saying that would stop them from asking?

tem said...

lunch time

El Padrino said...

key west does have a large LBG community

El Padrino said...

from what i got, the Recovery is solid

Beth said...

"key west does have a large LBG community"

Yeah, unbeknownst to us in advance (ns), especially this last weekend.

BLUE said...

blue's computer is now virus/porn free

Beth said...

Sorry to hear that blue.

/ep

El Padrino said...

"Yeah, unbeknownst to us in advance (ns), especially this last weekend."

i tolt zeke this same thing when he went awhile back

lots of aids there too

El Padrino said...

other than that though cool bars

Todd Packer said...

"ugly kid joe reference....blue gets it"

good thing it wasn't an uncle joey reference

Keef said...

"I see you caught last week's Tosh.0 too, eh?"

si

Todd Packer said...

nice post, freak

Keef said...

"-I can hear ya'll growning at that one from here"

I haven't grown since 3rd grade

/LP

Todd Packer said...

didn't watch any of game 5 last night... no desire to watch those 2 teams

Keef said...

"didn't watch any of game 5 last night... no desire to watch those 2 teams"


That. I still haven't watched 1 second of any game

BLUE said...

i didn't even realize they were playing last night (ns)

El Padrino said...

i stomached a total of maybe one whole game over the 5 games
\
however now i have to watch to see if the kobettes can win and keep O:FB intact

BLUE said...

maybe the lakers can get lebron

Keef said...

Maybe if Boston wins (AHIK*), they'll burn the city down

El Padrino said...

i like where your heads at keef

Keef said...

TWSS

El Padrino said...

en fuego

El Padrino said...

vandersloot with the bionic elbow

El Padrino said...

rhetoric should be off the shook*

Keef said...

suite

Meiz said...

Big things poppin today.

BLUE said...

like zits?

Keef said...

IN YOU FACE, LP

tem said...

espn.com says texas going to pac 10.

espn on tv says texas staying in the big 12.

BLUE said...

espn doesn't know which way to turn

BLUE said...

espn radio is saying Texas to the SEC

BLUE said...

pac-11 could be kinda pissed if nobody else follows colorado

Keef said...

ESPN the mag said Texas to Big 10

BLUE said...

mort tweeted that texas is thinking of becoming an independent

Spaceman Spiff said...

<a href="http://i984.photobucket.com/albums/ae325/Mrpedigree1/002-1.jpg>liddell's lip</a>

Spaceman Spiff said...

liddell's lip

fized

Spaceman Spiff said...

"Big 12 AD confirms to the NY Times that Texas on cusp of committing to Big 12"

the fuck

BLUE said...

i guess my purchase of pac-16poon.com is going to be worthless

tem said...

worth the same as pac10poon.com

BLUE said...

that has no value now either

kod said...

yeah, if Texas decides to stay, can Colorado and the Pac-10 pretend this whole thing never happened and have Colorado go back to the Big-12?

BLUE said...

with colorado joining the pac-10 though, I could get more poon pictures for that conference.

that seems like too much work now though

kod said...

hey Blue, what about that bet I mentioned earlier? You in?

BLUE said...

"yeah, if Texas decides to stay, can Colorado and the Pac-10 pretend this whole thing never happened and have Colorado go back to the Big-12?"

colorado won't go back, they'll make more money in the pac-10 either way. also Nebraska is gone.

only reason Texas would stay is so they can have a big12 network revenues and then have a University of Texas channel as well to supplement.

BLUE said...

"hey Blue, what about that bet I mentioned earlier? You in?"

sure, sounds good to me

tem said...

pac 10 can get someone to come there.

boise, tcu, texas a&m, someone will go.

tem said...

maybe the pac 10 will get Rutgers

tem said...

that'd be hilarity

tem said...

or take iowa from the big 10.

BLUE said...

jiminez got his shitty outing for the year out of his system in the rain the other day

kod said...

sure, sounds good to me

PAKISTAN

kod said...

some dropped a "they are the worse" on cmkod's fb status. Made me aitch

Keef said...

"boise, tcu, texas a&m, someone will go."

Boise joined MWC

Keef said...

"some dropped a "they are the worse" on cmkod's fb status. Made me aitch"

Some what

tem said...

"Boise joined MWC"

so? they can't leave that one?

Keef said...

Pac 10 is going to get NAU, Idaho, & Hawaii

Keef said...

"so? they can't leave that one?"

No

tem said...

damn, $56M box office take for the karate kid remake this week.

tem said...

"No"

yes they can.

Keef said...

"yes they can."

Then why did you ask, freak?

tem said...

to see if you knew the answer.

you didn't

tem said...

same reason a teacher asks questions in classes.

Keef said...

Oh, so you're a teacher now

Todd Packer said...

"Oh, so you're a teacher now"

temcher

tem said...

nope

Keef said...

Goddman

tem said...

i am the president of temhio state so i have to know some things about teachers

El Padrino said...

i'm leaving to join the pac-10

tem said...

that golfer has the heart of a little girl.

tem said...

oops had

Todd Packer said...

i'm leaving to join the pac-10 1/2

fixed

Keef said...

"i'm leaving to join the pac-10 1/2

fixed"


hilarity

tem said...

el pad should join the ivy league

Keef said...

LP could start a new conference and invite Oregon State

tem said...

why did i hear a report that the SEC was looking to expand?

how many more teams would they want?

BLUE said...

IT's the SEC!!!

BLUE said...

saw a dude driving down the street today with a bengals sticker, a cincinatti bearcats sticker, a THE ohio state sticker, and a reds sticker in his back window. First thought...."douche", second thought..."why is keith in Denver"

El Padrino said...

Starbucks just announced that starting July 1st, they'll be offering "Free. 1 click. No registration WIFI at all US locations." Even though Starbucks is ubiquitous, using their internet was always an onerous process, requiring the purchase of a coffee card and other hoops to jump through. Yeah, it's a market share grab, trying to compete with independent coffee shops and the likes of McDonald's and their McCafes. but good luck finding a free table at Starbucks ever again!

keef

Keef said...

"saw a dude driving down the street today with a bengals sticker, a cincinatti bearcats sticker, a THE ohio state sticker, and a reds sticker in his back window. First thought...."douche", second thought..."why is keith in Denver""

That guy is a douche. You can't have a tOSU & UC sticker on the same car

Keef said...

"keef"


Suite, thanks

El Padrino said...

zeke dont do it

kod said...

"LP could start a new conference and invite Oregon State"

-Oregon State looks down on EP's acedemic credentials. (WADR)

Keef said...

Michelob Ultra Pomegranate Raspberry


I tried that a few weeks ago. Was meh

Keef said...

"-Oregon State looks down on EP's acedemic credentials. (WADR)"



ymsoab again

Keef said...

Oregon State would be the Harvard of the LP10

BLUE said...

In 1972 a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today still wanted by the government they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire......THE A-TEAM....

duh ta duh duh

BLUE said...

"Michelob Ultra Pomegranate Raspberry


I tried that a few weeks ago. Was meh"


disgusting

kod said...

Dole pomegranate fruit bars are HDH

tem said...

A Team movie was solid.

Keef said...

Uncle Joey sees the irony in Japan having a guy named Honda on the soccer team

BLUE said...

"A Team movie was solid."

I want to see it, maybe this weekend.

BLUE said...

"Uncle Joey sees the irony in Japan having a guy named Honda on the soccer team"


but how does ugly kid joe feel?

tem said...

tem recommends the A Team movie.

Spaceman Spiff said...

"Uncle Joey sees the irony in Japan having a guy named Honda on the soccer team"

honda is japanese

tem said...

"honda is japanese"

right.

uncle joey doesn't get irony

Keef said...

"honda is japanese"

I know

Spaceman Spiff said...

im slow

Spaceman Spiff said...

brain needs to up its 40 time

BLUE said...

they also have a "sony" and a "nintendo" on the team...but no toyota

BLUE said...

toyota was on the team, but was recalled

Keef said...

"toyota was on the team, but was recalled"

ba da bum

Spaceman Spiff said...

"There's nothing wrong with tossing some lime juice and hot sauce in your beer. It's called a Michelada, and it can be mighty refreshing. What is wrong is Anheuser-Busch's experiment last year with beer, Clamato (that's clam and tomato juices), and some artificial lime flavoring."


the fuck, always have clamato in my micheladas

El Padrino said...

hey geniuses

this make sense


 Develop a rapport with Industry Auditors and intelligently convey our policies and procedures when adhering to all Industry rules and regulations

Spaceman Spiff said...

"The Michelada or cerveza preparada is a term loosely defining a Mexican alcoholic beverage made with beer, lime juice and assorted sauces, spices, peppers, tomato juices or Clamato"

blessed be

BLUE said...

that makes no sense

BLUE said...

i hope that's taken out of context

BLUE said...

clamato is awful

Keef said...

There's nothing wrong with tossing some lime juice and hot sauce (just an ounce) in your beer. It's called a Michelada, and it can be mighty refreshing

*fized

El Padrino said...

"-Oregon State looks down on EP's acedemic credentials. (WADR)"

you cant clown my edumacation* and spell shit wrong dude

BLUE said...

lots of people look down at 5'9"3/4th

Keef said...

" Develop a rapport with Industry Auditors and intelligently convey our policies and procedures when adhering to all Industry rules and regulations"

Maybe say while adhering

BLUE said...

now i think texas is leaning towards a 10 team big-12

BLUE said...

i'm so confused

El Padrino said...

ok

tem said...

is that some sort of resume talk?

if so, say while adhering as as. said.

kod said...

PARAGUAY

suite goal

El Padrino said...

while adhering

check

Keef said...

"PARAGUAY

suite goal"

O:FI

kod said...

O:FI


I'm in

BLUE said...

maybe use "whilst"

BLUE said...

why don't you guys like Ireland?

tem said...

because she never posed nude

tem said...

i mean what's the point of flashing all that skin, but never posing nude.


and nobody took a pic when she wasn't looking?

WFT?? massive failure on someone's part.

tem said...

it should be in the constitution that we have an inalienable right to see Kathy Ireland nude.


fucking forefathers and their short sightedness.

tem said...

if bill clinton was the 2nd president instead of whatever he was you damn well know the 13th amendment would be about titties.

Keef said...

"if bill clinton was the 2nd president instead of whatever he was you damn well know the 13th amendment would be about titties."

AHIK*

BLUE said...

he could have still proposed an amendment...have it included in the bill of rights

Keef said...

"have it included in the bill of rights"

ISWYDT

El Padrino said...

i text cmep

take out my sausage

she writes back

your home?


hahahhaa

Keef said...

"she writes back

your home?"



Runs in the family, huh

El Padrino said...

new* you would say that

Keef said...

can't let you down now

El Padrino said...

you forgot to mention in your post that you hate when people make grammtical errors on a comment page on a blog or on a text message

Keef said...

"you forgot to mention in your post that you hate when people make grammtical errors on a comment page on a blog or on a text message"


I don't hate that

Steve said...

"if bill clinton was the 2nd president instead of whatever he was you damn well know the 13th amendment would be about titties."


^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

El Padrino said...

I don't hate that

coulda fooled me

Steve said...

it would have been the first and only amendment that men agreed on from both sides.

El Padrino said...

can you imagine the article if the celtics win from sg?

as usher sayd

OH MYYYYYYYYYYYY

(pause)

GOSH

Keef said...

"coulda fooled me"

I coulda

BLUE said...

i don't hate titties

Spaceman Spiff said...

"can you imagine the article when the celtics win from sg?"

*fized

El Padrino said...

Proportionally and culturally speaking, Mr. Prokhorov and Mr. Johnson are a funny pairing. Mr. Prokhorov is 6'9 and speaks like the Terminator meets Russian mobster. Mr. Johnson, formerly the coach of Mark Cuban Dallas Mevericks, is 5'11 and has a nasally, Louisiana twang.

When asked what Mr. Prokhorov has in common with his new coach, the billionaire answered, "We are both gym rats," Mr. Prokhorov said. "We spend hours in the gym and we are hungry to win. He was nicknamed 'The Little General' and my nickname is 'The General.' It's a match made in heaven."

kod said...

Oh well, O:FB was fun while it lasted

Spaceman Spiff said...

prokhorov looks like cro cop

El Padrino said...

weird creature

Spaceman Spiff said...

block

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