Monday, May 03, 2010

Tomorrow is Pinocchio McGee's birthday

What a grate* weekend it was. hsil moved out and csil was in San Francisco. It was so quiet and drama free around here. A brother can get used to this shit.

Be prepared to read the headline "Philadelphia man uses Grand Canyon as bath tub" next weekend. On CNN, of course. Then they'll boot his wife right outta here. wadr

Kentucky Derby sucked me this weekend. I watch 3 minutes of zorse racing every year. I thought it was cool that they showed some dude placing a $100k bet on Super Saver about 5 minutes before the race, and they had to make 40 individual bets because the max bet is $2500. ($2500 X 40 = $100k, LP) Then the zorse goes on to win in the slop and dude wins $800k. (Because it was +800 and not -160, LP) Apparently his $100k bet shifted the line from 8-1 to 7-1. That's a new goal in my life, to be rich enough to be able to make a bet on an event that is large enough that it will shift the Vegas odds.

Looks like Mauer is out for a while with a heel. Sorry, kod. Good thing he already got that huge contract. /aitch Apparently he's week to week instead of day to day. Don't hear that too often in sports.

LeBron won MVP. He almost averaged a trip-dub this year. If he played in the 60s (AHIK*), he'd average 50-20-20, no doubt. He's a fucking horse.
Hey, that's my line. /LP

My dad is a pmip.

Pmip is not HDH, either.

GK is a fucking wreck. Fred Wilpon thinks that GK is a mess. I imagine that it's not easy to get a blood clot when you are taking blood thinners. He would reach out to mize for emotional support but mize has no emotions. But he does love being right about that shit that doesn't faze him.

Hockey is still being played. Last week I was into it, but now I'm over it. Just go away. TWSS

There's lot of earl* in the ocean, I guess. PETA is pisst*.

Anyone check out the new Freddy movie? I'm not sure if I want to see it or not. Apparently it did well this weekend. CNN headline says "Freddy Krueger kills at box office". ISWTDT

Phils just phinished off the Mess. Johan lookt* pretty good throwing the ball. Then the game started. When you get beat by a 47 year old guy who throws 80 MPH, you should probably re-evaluate your career.

mize thinks he knows the way to beat Money May. Of course, he also thought Ricky Hatton was the great white hope. Mize should stop thinking.

I think zeke is using this "new yob" story as a front for "I quit again"

287 comments:

1 – 200 of 287   Newer›   Newest»
Beth said...

Meiz, your name and pic for the next 3 days are But it belongs there dammit!!.

(If that's too long to fit properly you can drop the dammit.)

blue said...

talk bout the jinx to end all jinxes

El Padrino said...

i was pissed last night

El Padrino said...

yeah meiz good call on the bucks

blue said...

fucking nuggets lost their cool...now i don't get to watch sports for a month...(bet with cmblue)

blue said...

the one exception to the bet was the 3 minutes of the kentucky derby, because horse racing isn't sports.

El Padrino said...

"fucking nuggets lost their cool...now i don't get to watch sports for a month...(bet with cmblue)"

your nuts

El Padrino said...

"Kentucky Derby sucked me this weekend."

i assume it sucks everyone

most exciting 3 minutes in sports

El Padrino said...

"Phils just phinished off the Mess. Johan lookt* pretty good throwing the ball. Then the game started. When you get beat by a 47 year old guy who throws 80 MPH, you should probably re-evaluate your career"

i wanted to bash your face in last night cuz i knew you'd throw up some silly shit

that's right i was mad at you for writing something you didnt write yet

i'm nuts

El Padrino said...

"Tomorrow is Pinocchio McGee's birthday"

::wooden puppet::

blue said...

your nuts


nah, no real sports worth watching right now anyway, it's not like I made the bet in January

blue said...

although I would have liked to watch Chacin's outing against the Giants yesterday.

kid is the truth...in 2 years will be a dominating starter. He has torn up every level he's been at, struggled with location last year when he was called up because he was "afraid" of hitters. Now he's attacking the zone and letting his stuff get guys out.

El Padrino said...

"nah, no real sports worth watching right now anyway, it's not like I made the bet in January"

baseball, NBA playoffs, NHL playoffs (in HD), The preakness

blue said...

exactly...nuggets eliminated, hockey sucks, beisbol in May sucks, preakness isn't sports.

El Padrino said...

ok blue your talking yourself into it

i watch every single met game, at some point, not to start to finish but i catch a portion of every game if not the whole game

blue said...

gonna start prepping for the FNFL draft

blue said...

tebowisms are out of control around here now...it's getting ridiculous

El Padrino said...

if you build it, Tebow will come

El Padrino said...

i should see iron man before seeing iron man 2 right?

Steve said...

"i should see iron man before seeing iron man 2 right?"

you should see Iron Man just cause it's a quality flick. I doubt you'll lose anything if you watch 2 and then 1 though.

tem said...

"fucking nuggets lost their cool...now i don't get to watch sports for a month...(bet with cmblue)"

wft would you have gotten if you won?

tem said...

"i assume it sucks everyone"

it does not suck me.

can't get into it at all.

tem said...

"i should see iron man before seeing iron man 2 right?"

you should see iron man because tem has watched it and you don't want to have not seen a movie that tem has seen.

tem said...

save for grease 2

Jugdish said...

it does not suck me.

can't get into it at all.


^^^^^^

6 hours of people in hats followed by 3 minutes of zorses running. I imagine its only exciting if you have money on it, and centsports doesn't count.

El Padrino said...

"Betty White draws the line at nudity"


and that's good

tem said...

reading on mmqb about the saints and some vicodin stuff.

there is a picture of sean payton and joe vitt.

joe vitt looks like a ratard.

El Padrino said...

good read on mayweather/pacman fight that will never happen

El Padrino said...

super bowl hangover already

El Padrino said...

Blue.

tem said...

no betty white nude?

say it ain't so.

But It Belongs There! said...

vaginas are gross

tem said...

some are

blue said...

most are not

Keef said...

"::wooden puppet::"

der

El Padrino said...

wonder how forest gump would deal with this disaster

Beth said...

"::wooden puppet::"

She's older than me, suite*

El Padrino said...

idiot

Beth said...

Talking to yourself again EP?

Keef said...

"i was pissed last night"

Did cmlp put the booze up on the top shelf again?

Beth said...

"Did cmlp put the booze up on the top shelf again?"

Maybe that's what EP and cmep think is meant by "top shelf liquor"

El Padrino said...

that joke has been made already

Beth said...

"that joke has been made already"

Not by me.

But It Belongs There! said...

Dude walks in the store, asks if we have envelopes, walks over to the wall o' boxes and says, "These are envelopes, right?".



Fucking jackass

Keef said...

"Not by me."

Great, now LP is going to use this every time he LP's a story

Keef said...

mize
Did you know that Harbaugh's parent's* live in Mequon?

blue said...

greatest argument i've heard about all the AZ immigration law protests and bullshit going on around here and all across the country.


"what gives you (a coloradan) the right to legislate what the people of AZ want"

blue said...

only people that should be bitching are arizonians

Keef said...

LP is going to have lunch with Ahmadinejad today

blue said...

"Did you know that Harbaugh's parent's* live in Mequon?"

John or Jim?

Beth said...

"what gives you (a coloradan) the right to legislate what the people of AZ want"

I know this is a GROSS exaggeration, but couldn't in WWII people have said "what gives you (an american, etc) the right to legislate how the Germans want to treat the jews".

Keef said...

"I know this is a GROSS exaggeration, but couldn't in WWII people have said "what gives you (an american, etc) the right to legislate how the Germans want to treat the jews"."


We aren't killing hundreds of thousands of immigrants

Keef said...

Just thousands


s

Keef said...

"I know this is a GROSS exaggeration, but couldn't in WWII people have said "what gives you (an american, etc) the right to legislate how the Germans want to treat the jews"."



EXACTLY!!

/blitler

Steve said...

another law coming out of AZ:

Senator John McCain (R-Ariz.) has introduced a bill that would allow the President to imprison an unlimited number of American citizens (as well as foreigners) indefinitely without trial. Known as The Enemy Belligerent Interrogation, Detention, and Prosecution Act of 2010, or S. 3081, the bill authorizes the President to deny a detainee a trial by jury simply by designating that person an "enemy belligerent."

El Padrino said...

obama wouldnt use it

blue said...

"I know this is a GROSS exaggeration, but couldn't in WWII people have said "what gives you (an american, etc) the right to legislate how the Germans want to treat the jews"


we didn't, we only got involved when the japs bombed pearl harbor, up until that point we were innocent bystanders watching from the sidelines

blue said...

we didn't give a shit that they were executing jews, we cared that they were invading other countries...jewless countries

But It Belongs There! said...

"mize
Did you know that Harbaugh's parent's* live in Mequon?"


Yes. I have Jim & John's addresses in this very computer

Keef said...

DP has a good conversation going today. If everyone wants to play for the Yankees so badly, why do they have to overpay so much to sign players

El Padrino said...

ok rev

El Padrino said...

rev comment towards meiz

El Padrino said...

didnt think you had enough RAM to hold those addy's in that very computer

blue said...

do they overpay?

But It Belongs There! said...

"didnt think you had enough RAM to hold those addy's in that very computer"


Congrats again on not paying attention to anything

El Padrino said...

"Congrats again on not paying attention to anything"

not by me

blue said...

new part-time receptionist forgot to set her alarm, so she's late.

she's not supposed to be in until 10:30 and she overslept...to me, that is hilarity

Keef said...

fir* her as.

Steve said...

overslept = didn't give a shit

Spaceman Spiff said...

deron's faking is hilarity

Keef said...

he's copying lebron

blue said...

"deron's faking is hilarity"


i came to hate Carlos Boozer...i've added him to the total douche list.

list is:

Dirk
Manu
Boozer
Pau

Keef said...

kenyon is on that list

Keef said...

should be on that list

El Padrino said...

spiff they got the habana outpost place i pimped opening up in malibu

Spaceman Spiff said...

thanks, never got to malibu though

JFreak said...

i annihilated tem in cod:mw2.

El Padrino said...

meiz have you learned your lesson in regards to jinxin

But It Belongs There! said...

So I've had my hopes all up today because the new chick with the slammin body is on the schedule to start today. I ask bossman "Is new chick not coming in today?". Bossman says, "Oh yeah, she's not coming in today".


WTF man? You just crushed my spirits. Dick.

El Padrino said...

keef we betting?

El Padrino said...

sex in the workplace

do it

Keef said...

"keef we betting?"


si

tem said...

"greatest argument i've heard about all the AZ immigration law protests and bullshit going on around here and all across the country.


"what gives you (a coloradan) the right to legislate what the people of AZ want""


someone at worked asked me what i thought about the AZ thing and asked me if i went to any of the protests in columbus about it.

i said basically the same thing.

i got no say in what AZ does. they can do whatever the fuck they want.

tem said...

"but couldn't in WWII people have said "what gives you (an american, etc) the right to legislate how the Germans want to treat the jews"."

they did say that.

i don't think we attacked germany until they started taking over europe. the jew thing didn't make us go to war.

tem said...

nm, blue covered it

El Padrino said...

i want a choco taco

tem said...

"kenyon is on that list"

dooling? /tem

tem said...

"i annihilated tem in cod:mw2"

you were on my team.

tem said...

but freak did get more points than me.

tem said...

so that might be the annihilation

tem said...

whoever tied furry balls in FMLB should be embarrassed.

El Padrino said...

this place sucks

El Padrino said...

gran torino was great, loved it

Keef said...

"gran torino was great, loved the racism"


*fized

Keef said...

how many days before mize gets the "Don't talk to me, alright!? Knock it off!" from the new lady

El Padrino said...

what are you fishheads looking at

El Padrino said...

i can watch taken a thousand times

Keef said...

I don't think there's any movie I could watch a thousand times

El Padrino said...

I don't think there's any movie I could watch a thousand times except for Sound of Music

*ficced

Keef said...

I should of* waited a couple days and boat* these instead

Keef said...

"I don't think there's any movie I could watch a thousand times except for Sound of Music"

Didn't you say that you're going to a broadway show this year?

Keef said...

Interesting

El Padrino said...

"Didn't you say that you're going to a broadway show this year?"

don't turn this around, this is your weakness

Keef said...

"don't turn this around, this is your weakness"

So, yes. Got it.

El Padrino said...

i've seen plays not musicals

But It Belongs There! said...

"meiz have you learned your lesson in regards to jinxin"


Don't care

El Padrino said...

oh here we go

El Padrino said...

After the Cowboys selected Dez Bryant in the first round of the draft, wide receivers Patrick Crayton and Sam Hurd have asked the team to trade them, and Crayton has announced that he's skipping all voluntary offseason workouts.

El Padrino said...

sam hurd requesting a trade is hilarity

he has like 31 career catches

Keef said...

"i've seen plays not musicals"


Ah, much less ghey


s

Keef said...

"Don't care"


YOU LIE!

Keef said...

mize
Gonna fish for some northern pike this weekend

ns

Keef said...

Or is it "gonna play fish"?

s

El Padrino said...

in Flagstaff?

S

Keef said...

"in Flagstaff?

S"


Yes.

NS

But It Belongs There! said...

"mize
Gonna fish for some northern pike this weekend

ns"



I had no idea there are Northern in Arizona. Do youse have walleye there too?

blue said...

they got pike in idaho too

Keef said...

"I had no idea there are Northern in Arizona. Do youse have walleye there too?"

yeah only a few lakes up north have northern. Quite a few have walleye

tem said...

pike plays for carolina

But It Belongs There! said...

"they got pike in idaho too"


I would assume so

Keef said...

yeah idaho is north

blue said...

"pike plays for carolina"

define "plays"

El Padrino said...

Morimoto destroyed Zakarian last night

tem said...

is kind of on their team

tem said...

"Morimoto destroyed Zakarian last night"


::blank stare::

But It Belongs There! said...

Iron Chef, Tem

But It Belongs There! said...

I'm a big Mike Symon fan

But It Belongs There! said...

Squad 6 may be expanded next season

tem said...

you all watch a show where people just cook?

tem said...

cooking does not suck me

tem said...

hey did el pad talk about the times square bomb yet?

Spaceman Spiff said...

morimoto is a cyborg

Spaceman Spiff said...

"Squad 6 may be expanded next season"

why do they wanna jinx the season already

But It Belongs There! said...

Journeymen

But It Belongs There! said...

"why do they wanna jinx the season already"


Does not compute

blue said...

they're going to call it squad 12 and they'll have a bunch of dudes that have hightop fades

Keef said...

"Journeymen"

9/10

JFreak said...

"you were on my team."

ANNIHILATE YOU!

Keef said...

I want freak's life. But with sex

Jugdish said...

12/24

Beth said...

"I want freak's life. But with sex"

So you don't want freak's life, got it.

tem said...

9/10

Keef said...

17/24

Keef said...

"So you don't want freak's life, got it."

touche

But It Belongs There! said...

"they're going to call it squad 12 and they'll have a bunch of dudes that have hightop fades"


Probably not

tem said...

13/24

Keef said...

15/26

tem said...

17/26

tem said...

some of those i hadn't even heard of. i just quit with time left.

Spaceman Spiff said...

16/26

Steve said...

17/25

Keef said...

"17/25"


stevefast

But It Belongs There! said...

I have to wait until I'm home to take the quizzes

Keef said...

"I have to wait until I'm home to take the quizzes"


Didn't you link one?

But It Belongs There! said...

"Didn't you link one?"


Yeah. Doesn't mean I have time to take it. I can't just tell a customer they have to wait because I'm taking a sporcle quiz.

JFreak said...

"I can't just tell a customer they have to wait because I'm taking a sporcle quiz."

You could if you really wanted to.

Keef said...

"Yeah. Doesn't mean I have time to take it. I can't just tell a customer they have to wait because I'm taking a sporcle quiz."

Jesus, you're like cmk. She acts like she's so busy every second of the day that she has no time to do anything else

JFreak said...

"17/25"

21/25

El Padrino said...

freak is brilliant

El Padrino said...

meiz is mad busy yo

But It Belongs There! said...

"Jesus, you're like cmk. She acts like she's so busy every second of the day that she has no time to do anything else"


I'm kinda obligated to wait on the customers as they come in here. Is that a tough concept to grasp?

tem said...

do you get that money customers?

But It Belongs There! said...

Oh, I'm sorry ma'am. I'm busy seeing how many board games I can guess. You'll have to wait 6 minutes for me to finish this quiz. Your business is not as important as this.

Keef said...

"I'm kinda obligated to wait on the customers as they come in here. Is that a tough concept to grasp?"

You don't have a line of customers out the door

El Padrino said...

"Heat's Riley extends deal, hints about coaching"

gonna bag that kid like he bagged stan vg

or this is a ploy to keep wade

But It Belongs There! said...

"do you get that money customers?"

Many?


Yes.


At least 10 per hour.

Keef said...

"Oh, I'm sorry ma'am. I'm busy seeing how many board games I can guess. You'll have to wait 6 minutes for me to finish this quiz. Your business is not as important as this."


Tuck in your string

El Padrino said...

meiz we've seen the type of store you work in

But It Belongs There! said...

You're pretty retarded, Keith

But It Belongs There! said...

"meiz we've seen the type of store you work in"


And?

Keef said...

"Yes.


At least 10 per hour."


And you have at least 3 people working in there, right? so that's 3 per hour for you.

JESUS CHRIST, CALL FOR BACKUP!

Spaceman Spiff said...

"At least 10 per hour."

per employee or split amongst yous guys

Keef said...

"You're pretty retarded, Keith"

OK

But It Belongs There! said...

"And you have at least 3 people working in there, right? so that's 3 per hour for you. "


Wrong

Keef said...

The "mize is dummy" theory is gaining steam

But It Belongs There! said...

"per employee or split amongst yous guys"


10 just for me. I do ~double what the other workstation does

Spaceman Spiff said...

instead of going back and forth with keef, meiz could have done a quiz

Keef said...

"Wrong"

You
new guy
dummy
rich lady
preggo lady
bossman

Not that they're all there at once, but that's 6 people right there

Keef said...

"10 just for me. I do ~double what the other workstation does"


So 1 every 6 minutes. Plenty of time for sporcle

Keef said...

"instead of going back and forth with keef, meiz could have done a quiz"


^^^^^^^

El Padrino said...

"meiz we've seen the type of store you work in"


And?

and we surmise that a good % of the time it's dead

But It Belongs There! said...

"So 1 every 6 minutes. Plenty of time for sporcle"


Oh, so a transaction consists of someone walking in, saying Hi and walking out. Got it.

But It Belongs There! said...

"and we surmise that a good % of the time it's dead"


There's a saying that some Brooklyn Eyetalian around here likes to use. Something about assumption, IIRC.

Spaceman Spiff said...

"A British sniper set a world sharpshooting record by taking out two Taliban soldiers in Afghanistan from more than a mile and a half away -- a distance so great, experts say the terrorists wouldn't have even heard the shots."

tem said...

i thought meiz was trying out to be a driver

tem said...

i don't like the fact that someone can shoot me from 1.5 miles away.

But It Belongs There! said...

"i thought meiz was trying out to be a driver"


Then I'll have all day to do sporcle.

El Padrino said...

"There's a saying that some Brooklyn Eyetalian around here likes to use. Something about assumption, IIRC."

there has to be a dead period
is the point

El Padrino said...

assumption is the mother of all fuck ups

blue said...

""17/25""

25/25...i watch too much TV

But It Belongs There! said...

"i don't like the fact that someone can shoot me from 1.5 miles away."


I've always wanted to shoot someone/something from an extreme distance.

blue said...

there's only 2 men on the planet who can make that shot...and the other is marky mark

Jugdish said...

"i don't like the fact that someone can shoot me from 1.5 miles away."


just make sure you're always running in a zig zag

El Padrino said...

no women, no children

Beth said...

Meiz, the way you're reacting to people intentionally baiting you, we might as well call you EP Junior.

But It Belongs There! said...

"there has to be a dead period
is the point"


There might be one dead period > 10 minutes per day, but we usually have projects to do during said dead period.

El Padrino said...

what, i normally swim around the bait

El Padrino said...

S

El Padrino said...

block

But It Belongs There! said...

"Meiz, the way you're reacting to people intentionally baiting you, we might as well call you EP Junior."


Well aware

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