Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Sleepy

It is 8:15am and I am still dead tired. I slept for 8hrs but still I am tired. Maybe I sleep too much. Maybe I have chronic fatigue syndrome. Is that still around or did they finally figure out some doctor made it up? I figure some whiny chick was always asking her doctor why she felt tired. She wouldn't stop asking so the doctor made up chronic fatigue. I also think that is how the meniscus was invented.


So on saturday I went to the Lion's Den (porn store). It was your usual saturday of hitting the batting cages then going to a porn store. Anyway, porn be expensive you. It was like 50 bucks per movie. At least the good ones that said they were winners of AVN awards. Not sure what AVN is, but I assume it is their Oscars. They had some hilarious spoof porns. They had Seinfeld, Scrubs, Cosby Show, Dukes of Hazard. It was cool. I almost got the Dukes of Hazard one but it was 59.99. It did have over 4 hours of action though. Also Alexis Texas was in it. My buddy bought some Lions Den special DVD, it was only 30 bucks and is just a bunch of cut scenes from different movies. The guy behind the counter said it was a good deal. Anyway, the trip got me thinking about what could be the most inappropriate plot for a porn. Right now I am thinking something along the lines of recently widowed 65yr old lady adopts twin 8yr old girls from an Orphanage. I bet El Pad would watch that though.


Well OF:B is still alive I guess. Orlando had a few things go for them and they won. 1) Dwight Howard played a lot of minutes and shot the ball well 2)Coach RJ figured out that JJ Redick > Vince Carter and 3) Rondo shot like crap. I doubt anyone thinks the Magic are coming back to win this series, but I guess it was nice to see them not get swept. Its only a matter of time though before the refs hand games to Boston and LA. That is a dream finals for Stern and Co.


French Open is going on now. I don't even know who is in it really. But I say Federer and a Williams win. Is Nadal still hurt? Was he ever hurt? I don't know. By the by, is tennis a sport or a game?


I forgot to cut my hair last night. Probably because I was at work until 8:30pm. I hate late afternoon meetings that just drag on into the night.


No raise yet. Meiz still is blocking it. Thanks.


Keith, think of my name now, no way the Pirates win this series. xnij.


I'll toss out some UFC picks in the comments. Right now I need to shower.

Go Comment.

430 comments:

1 – 200 of 430   Newer›   Newest»
El Padrino said...

AVN = Adult Video Network and right the AVN awards are the Oscars of porn

best cumshot
best threesome
best anal

etc.

El Padrino said...

can't even believe people still buy porn, it's like music at this point

El Padrino said...

"most inappropriate plot for a porn"

i would anyone, ANYONE, of leagal age getting fucked

El Padrino said...

*watch

El Padrino said...

n korea trying motherfuckers

tem said...

"can't even believe people still buy porn, it's like music at this point"

'splain how i can watch the dukes of hazard spoof porn without paying.

tem said...

i figure i should drive to work now.

tem said...

maybe this is why i don't have a raise yet.

jugdish said...

can't even believe people still buy porn, it's like music at this point...and taxes



fixed


wadr

Ben said...

EP doesn't pay for music?

BLUE said...

for shame

El Padrino said...

"'splain how i can watch the dukes of hazard spoof porn without paying."

interwebs, find it and download it
if you want a specific title that isn't free than your choosing to pay for it

El Padrino said...

"EP doesn't pay for music?"

shh

El Padrino said...

Obama Approval Falls to New Low: 42%

El Padrino said...

gold gold gold!!!

El Padrino said...

europe sucks

El Padrino said...

SOURCE: Obama skipping Memorial Day ceremony at Arlington National Cemetery. 'He'll be on vacation in Chicago'...

real nice

jugdish said...

SOURCE: Obama skipping Memorial Day ceremony at Arlington National Cemetery. 'He'll be on vacation in Chicago on Jug's dime'


fixed

jugdish said...

dude who lost 7 teeth in that game the other day came back and played in the same period...barely missed a shift.


faak!

El Padrino said...

"On a July afternoon in 2006, Patrick Hale microwaved a bag of popcorn for his two young children and sat down with them to watch television. When he got up to change the channel, he heard a strange noise behind him, and turned to see his 23-month-old daughter, Allison, turning purple and unable to breathe"


look i feel really bad for this guy and his family but dude not even two months old, you HAVE to know popcorn is not safe for a toddler

awful story

El Padrino said...

“Neither one of us knew that popcorn was unsafe,” said her mother, Christie Hale of Keller, Tex.

El Padrino said...

full article

El Padrino said...

tem take a shot of vodka at the bar tonight but use your eye instead

jugdish said...

they should call that shot an IN YOU FACE!


tem: I'd like a shot of goose, IN YOU FACE!

BLUE said...

"On a July afternoon in 2006, Patrick Hale microwaved a bag of popcorn for his two young children and sat down with them to watch television. When he got up to change the channel, he heard a strange noise behind him, and turned to see his 23-month-old daughter, Allison, turning purple and unable to breathe"


told you that microwaves kill people

/tem

BLUE said...

too soon?

jugdish said...

no, it happened in 2006.

like people read labels anyways

kod said...

"By the by, is tennis a sport or a game?"

-sport (at least for competitive tennis tournaments); competitive tennis requires far too much conditioning and fitness to be just a game

kod said...

"'splain how i can watch the dukes of hazard spoof porn without paying."

-I have a free site I've been using for years; there are tens of thousands of titles (ns) within hundreds of genres (including free videos from major players like Vivid)

-I'll link it up sometime next week (can't link it from work)

jugdish said...

let's make sure we hang out at a place that has free wifi in chicago

El Padrino said...

michigan ban

BLUE said...

"-sport (at least for competitive tennis tournaments); competitive tennis requires far too much conditioning and fitness to be just a game"

if you don't wear a number, it's not a sport.

tem said...

"if you want a specific title that isn't free than your choosing to pay for it"

so its not like music at all.

got it.

tem said...

“Neither one of us knew that popcorn was unsafe,” said her mother, Christie Hale, originally from NYC.


*fixed

El Padrino said...

how bad the oil spill is compared to other parts of the country via google earf

El Padrino said...

good fic*

BLUE said...

our doctor gives us a list of unsafe foods...popcorn is on that list...maybe because of these people

El Padrino said...

but blue you knew popcorn was a bit of a wild card before that list i bet

i mean sometimes when i eat it, a lil kernal goes wherever it wants, it doesnt make me choke cuz i fucking annihilate it but you get the idea

kod said...

"if you don't wear a number, it's not a sport."

-everyone has a number in tennis; it just corresponds with how good you are relative to your teammates

kod said...

or competition (if it's a non-team tourney)

kod said...

marshmallows are very dangerous for young children; I didn't know that until I was in my mid-20s (ns)

tem said...

how are they dangerous?

tem said...

i don't really know what is dangerous to small children but i don't have children nor do i watch them.

kod said...

how are they dangerous?

if uncooked, they expand in the mouth and throat...even mini marshmallows can be problematic I guess

tem said...

"they expand in the mouth and throat..."


hehe

El Padrino said...

twss

El Padrino said...

couple found alive, hiding under trash

tem said...

el pad must just look at links all day.

El Padrino said...

my morning news run

El Padrino said...

and i give you guys gems

BLUE said...

"-everyone has a number in tennis; it just corresponds with how good you are relative to your teammates"

what's federereerer's number?

jugdish said...

NYC will not get the super bowl

tem said...

"what's federereerer's number?"

1

tem said...

"NYC will not get the super bowl"

do they even have a stadium?

jugdish said...

do they even have a stadium?


negative

El Padrino said...

i thought the announcement was later

El Padrino said...

it would be giants stadium, nyc will get the events, nj will get the game

tem said...

"do they even have a stadium?


negative"

then it would seem obvious that they are not getting it.

wava is not getting it either.

jugdish said...

i have insider information

tem said...

scientist info

jugdish said...

it would be giants stadium, nyc will get the events, nj will get the game


nyc = nj


got it

BLUE said...

armpit of america

BLUE said...

cmblue was watching the bachlorette last night and made me watch some video of a guy from here.

in the video he's tromping across a frozen lake, ice fishing, out in the middle of nowhere, shows his house and all these animals he's had stuffed or mounted...makes him sound like he lives out in the middle of nowhere in CO...

he lives in the burbs...gotta love that TV editing.

jugdish said...

he lives in the burg...gotta love that TV editing.

fixed



mize?

jugdish said...

RE: chicago trip


im putting together a weekend beach trip with my softball team. As soon as I get a weekend nailed down for that, we'll get a weekend picked out for the chicago trip.

BLUE said...

jug is taking us all to the beach?

BLUE said...

beach trip...no need for suntan oil

El Padrino said...

great cry

H said...

No link to EA last night? Where's Beth when I need her? Heard EA looked SMOKIN'

BLUE said...

"great cry"

welcome to last month

El Padrino said...

buddy passed that along

BLUE said...

this google/apple rivalry seems fun

H said...

Eh, not awful...

Keef said...

"No link to EA last night? Where's Beth when I need her? Heard EA looked SMOKIN'"


Do you subscribe to google?

El Padrino said...

the 1:59 mark is excellent

BLUE said...

"Do you subscribe to google?"

he spent his subscription money on sending beer to EP.

H said...

"Do you subscribe to google?"

Is someone extra ornery today? Is your string showing, Keef?

H said...

Is cmk holding out on you again?

H said...

Working at the HD with the Mexicans got you down?

H said...

"he spent his subscription money on sending beer to EP."

If Blue lost the bet, he'd have boat* EP the brewery.

H said...

EP should come to chi-town. His first 12 beers will be on me. The rest will be on Jug apparently.

H said...

EP should come to chi-town. His first 12 beers will be on me. The rest will be on Jug apparently.

Beth said...

"Where's Beth when I need her?"

If I only had a dollar for every time a guy said this...

H said...

Sleep time. See you on AD...maybe.

El Padrino said...

hi honey

H said...

"If I only had a dollar for every time a guy said this..."

Hell, all the times EP and Steve have said it would buy you a mansion.

Meiz said...

"3) Rondo shot like crap."


This is because Rondo can't fuckin'shoot

El Padrino said...

"This is because Rondo can't fuckin'shoot"

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

still dont know how you can be the greatest pg in the world but not hit a 15 footer

mind bottling

El Padrino said...

"EP should come to chi-town. His first 12 beers will be on me. The rest will be on Jug apparently."

or, you can just mail it

El Padrino said...

and me in chicago that weekend for whatever is going on is AHIK

kod said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Keef said...

"Is someone extra ornery today? Is your string showing, Keef?"


Nope

Keef said...

"I'm gonna be a holder outer except to say a pretty well known and liked show will shut down production after next season."

To make room for the Kodashians?

kod said...

"To make room for the Kodashians?"


haha; God willing

El Padrino said...

despite being paid millions to sit at the end of the Knicks bench 2 years in a row Eddy curry is broke

El Padrino said...

"Mr. Curry appears to be a very, very generous man," David said. "He appears to have taken it upon himself to support every person named Curry on the East Coast."

hilarity

BLUE said...

"I'm gonna be a holder outer except to say a pretty well known and liked show will shut down production after next season."


the office, we all know this

kod said...

can neither confirm nor deny

El Padrino said...

Lindsay Lohan was offered the part of the stripper, Jade, but turned it down. She did not like the script and thought the movie would bomb.

idiot

jugdish said...

jug is taking us all to the beach?



if you're on my softball team

jugdish said...

Like the personal chef, the Rolls-Royce, the private school tuition and $650 a month on cable TV.




he should go to straight basic cable

/mize

jugdish said...

Last year, Curry was sued by his former limo driver, who accused the 7-foot-tall center of pleasuring himself in the nude while panting, "Come and touch it."



Yikes!

tem said...

i'd go to chicago, but nobody invited me.

bastards.

kod said...

"Like the personal chef, the Rolls-Royce, the private school tuition and $650 a month on cable TV."


it would have jumped to $750 if he had canceled it

/Meiz


*Fiz

jugdish said...

i'd go to chicago, but nobody invited me.

bastards.



everyone is invited, maybe my thursday invite will be a formal invitation

jugdish said...

it would have jumped to $750 if he had canceled it

hilarity

tem said...

i got my raise.

Keef said...

"i'd go to chicago, but nobody invited me.

bastards."


The trip is only for people who haven't done a cribs

Keef said...

cribs post*

jugdish said...

bastard!

/Mize


congrats!

/Jug

tem said...

"The trip is only for people who haven't done a cribs"

then why are you going?

tem said...

LIES

BLUE said...

"The trip is only for people who haven't done a cribs"

so jug...got it

BLUE said...

"i got my raise."


good work tem, congrats

jugdish said...

good work tem, congrats


TWTBS

Meiz said...

This top comment really puts the hurt on my usual strategy of leaving the window at the top of the page.


Thanks, EP!

tem said...

delete it meiz. you have the power

Meiz said...

"i'd go to chicago, but nobody invited me.

bastards."


Not true

kod said...

"i got my raise."

congrats Tem!!

tem said...

if i didn't read it then it didn't happen.


i mean if i didn't have it read to me then it didn't happen.

Meiz said...

Tem, you should come to Chicago. We're going some time this summer.

Meiz said...

"i got my raise."


Fucker.

tem said...

cool, i'm down.

tem said...

"Fucker."

i know you said it WADR

BLUE said...

are we in search of good pizza?

jugdish said...

everything mize says is WADR

tem said...

i've got a bad feeling about this

BLUE said...

when does tem leave for buttford?

tem said...

that's no moon

Meiz said...

"are we in search of good pizza?"


Not I

tem said...

we leave thursday afternoon

El Padrino said...

"i got my raise."

do you have to pay more taxes now?

/ep

El Padrino said...

"are we in search of good pizza?"

heard there were a few thin crust joints that are worth a looksie

tem said...

is there an olive garden in chicago we can go to for some real eye talian food?

jugdish said...

There is a place called Philly's that is really good...not sure if they have more than one location. we could all hop in the aveo and head out there since its not in the city

tem said...

no driving. we have to take a train or walk.

jugdish said...

or bus

Meiz said...

The Aveo will not be in attendance

tem said...

i used to know someone in chicago, but she moved to DC

kod said...

I'm bringing my Segway

kod said...

maybe I can race TP in his Hovaround

jugdish said...

tp might be able to get us the senior discount at some places


s

tem said...

obviously he can

jugdish said...

ill bring my "so is your face!" shirt

Beth said...

"i got my raise"

Raises are tax free you know.

/EP

El Padrino said...

i can't believe glan davis has turned out to be ok and getting crunchtime minutes making plays

he looks like a ratard

tem said...

he looks like a big baby

tem said...

beth are we meeting up at that mexican place in buford on saturday?

El Padrino said...

hence the name, but yeah still think he's a dog

probably my boston hatred

El Padrino said...

even though i hate philly more
of rev goes to chicago i'm not even talking to him

jugdish said...

beth are we meeting up at that mexican place in buford on saturday?



Si

/beth

El Padrino said...

hope chicago destroys philly in the cup finals

jugdish said...

hope chicago destroys philly in the cup finals


^^^^^^^^^

El Padrino said...

anyone need any offense in the Y! league or no one gives a shit

Beth said...

"beth are we meeting up at that mexican place in buford on saturday?"

The one with all the illegals? Sure.

tem said...

"anyone need any offense in the Y! league or no one gives a shit"

furry balls probably needs offense.

tem said...

hope chicago and philly play to a tie and both teams just go away.

tem said...

"The one with all the illegals? Sure."

excellent. i will buy you a big ass margarita.

El Padrino said...

good plan tem

El Padrino said...

leave our dirty rat birds alone fuck faces

Keef said...

"then why are you going?"


I'm not

Keef said...

"so jug...got it"

I must of* missed kod's crib

Keef said...

beth
I need a name/pic

Beth said...

"excellent. i will buy you a big ass margarita"

Hmmmm, if cgtif doesn't trust you enough to get drunk around you, why should I?

Beth said...

"beth
I need a name/pic"

Shit that's right, totally forgot. I'll get you something soon for tomorrow thru Friday.

Meiz said...

New girl is not handling her 1st big fuck-up very well

jugdish said...

new guy: mize, can i go to chicago with you?

Keef said...

Phil Jackson gonna join LeBron in Chicago

kod said...

"I must of* missed kod's crib"


-it was spectacular

jugdish said...

-it was spectacular


there was one whole room that was a litter box

Meiz said...

"I must of* missed kod's crib"


Me too?

kod said...

"there was one whole room that was a litter box"

-ah, the "beach room"; always a guest favorite

Keef said...

"there was one whole room that was a litter box"

I have rooms that size, too

/mize

kod said...

"I must of* missed kod's crib"


Me too?

-nah, I'm just kidding around; I will do one pretty soon

Keef said...

"-nah, I'm just kidding around; I will do one pretty soon"



You better not be foolin'!

kod said...

"You better not be foolin'!"

nope; as soon as we get the spring cleaning accomplished, I'll be ready to go (cmkod says she is doing it this week when I am out of town...I hope it happens, but am not holding my breath...WADR to cmkod)

tem said...

"Hmmmm, if cgtif doesn't trust you enough to get drunk around you, why should I?"

oh she does now.

also you can trust me because we are on your turf.

jugdish said...

nope; as soon as we get the spring cleaning accomplished


I'm in the middle of that shit now.

El Padrino said...

you know what I say, if there is synthetic grass on the turf then play ball

BLUE said...

there is no such thing as spring


/al gore

kod said...

"there is no such thing as spring"


/everyone in Northern Minnesota

Keef said...

"I'm in the middle of that shit now."


WFT? What are you a bitch? Cleaning is a chick's job

/LP

Keef said...

We hired a pool service company, starting tomorrow. No time for that shit

tem said...

they might find some of the shit that's been lost recently.

tem said...

like hsilok's virginity

Keef said...

Steve needs to get that helmet with the mohawk that those motorcycle riders wear

Keef said...

"they might find some of the shit that's been lost recently."

Or maybe they'll disappear too

jugdish said...

WFT? What are you a bitch? Cleaning is a chick's job



chuckle

jugdish said...

We hired a pool service company, starting tomorrow. No time for that shit


never had a pool, is it that bad?

tem said...

"Or maybe they'll disappear too"

hopefully after they clean

tem said...

but before you pay

tem said...

i have 4 pools, we have people that clean them. it looks tiring. /blue

BLUE said...

"Steve needs to get that helmet with the mohawk that those motorcycle riders wear"

i don't ride a motorcycle

/steve

BLUE said...

"i have 4 pools, we have people that clean them. it looks tiring. /blue"


this is not entirely false

Keef said...

This is entirely true

*fized

jugdish said...

i know the hooters telling the waitress to lose weight story has been posted, but did anyone see the GM who told her she was too fat? its in the video

Keef said...

"never had a pool, is it that bad?"


During winter & spring it's easy to maintain. But during summer when it's hot as shit, it's a daily job or else algae becomes a problem

jugdish said...

so those pool guys come out daily?

jugdish said...

block

jugdish said...

bold

«Oldest ‹Older   1 – 200 of 430   Newer› Newest»

Top Of The Page Material:

"Idiots with nothing better to do"





"Most Boston sports fans are just douchebags. Because most people from New England are douchebags." - tem





"Obama got elected because of the Rooney rule" - Jug





"you should never let debt stop you from pro-creating anyway" - El Padrino





"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H





"i'm dumb and sensitive. basically i'm a woman" - L Padrino





"I'm so horny this morning. If there wasn't this sex offender list going around id grope bitches on the train this morning" - L Padrino