Friday, April 30, 2010

George Hill? Really?

I want to talk about Bossaball. I think the states should adopt this sport.



Agree? It's a combination of volleyball, like flipping and shit. And soccer. Which is frowned upon. But it's not really soccer per se, it's the fact that you can use your feet during a volleyball contest while jumping on a trampoline. Looks awesome. Check the bible for more information.

Joe Torre's nose or Bob Uecker's nose? Who would win? Rosters expanding for the All-Star games dilutes being an All Star. Hey look Boxing wants us to care about a fight this weekend. Also the Kentucky Derby is this weekend. The sentimental favorite is Stately Victor. Read about him here. The favorite is 3-1 Looking at Lucky, a Baffert horse, but drew Post 1 yesterday. Not good. No horse has won the Derby from the rail post since 1986. That's when the Mets last won a World Series. Good year. The only Filly (female horse) in the race drew 11 and is quite intriguing. I think Devil May Care will at least show (no worse than finishing 3rd). And to round out the trifecta I would say.....Sidney's Candy and Dublin. Do not take that to the bank it's a bunch of animals racing. Awesome Act is a cool horse name. I think I made a list of horse names for each LOV member. I should go check that. It was probably somewhat amusing. 2 years ago I got Laser Eye Surgery, still stands as the best decision I ever made. Close second is shaving my balls regularly. AJA eyesight is important. I need to consume more gelato. Mavs aint winning the title/ In fact they got bounced by a team with an average age of 54. Congrats Dallas. You suck in everything. Heather Brooke does WORK.

442 comments:

1 – 200 of 442   Newer›   Newest»
tem said...

It was probably somewhat amusing. 7 years ago I got Laser Eye Surgery, still stands as the second best decision I ever made.

fixed for tem

tem said...

so kod went to fargo to rub one out?

tem said...

i don't really have enough energy to start the day with a run.

tem said...

i need some liquid schwartz

tem said...

like from spaceballs

tem said...

if i could have any super powers it'd be tough to pass up supermans powers, but jedi powers would be cool too

tem said...

i'd totally want immortality though

tem said...

course when the sun explodes and engulfs earth what happens to the immortals then?

tem said...

i hope they have invented space travel by then

tem said...

i mean efficient space travel

tem said...

of course if you are immortal i guess you could just launch yourself in some direction.

eventually you'd get somewhere.

blue said...

i got laser eye surgery nine years ago.

3rd best decision I ever made

tem said...

that's be some boring ass times though

tem said...

better take an xbox and a sex doll

tem said...

"i got laser eye surgery nine years ago.

3rd best decision I ever made"


1) marrying cmblue
2) hating blacks
3) lazer eye surgery

blue said...

immortalness is overrated

tem said...

i'm gonna spell it lazer from now on.

looks cooler.

blue said...

your xbox won't work in space

tem said...

z is pretty much tons cooler than s

tem said...

"your xbox won't work in space"

i'd be in a ship

tem said...

with a cactus to provide me oxygen

tem said...

it'd suck when the sex doll gets busted by the cactus

tem said...

i mean, i wouldn't be able to do xbox live, but i could play the games.

blue said...

"i'd be in a ship"

do you have a DC converter? cuz you know the only plugs they have are like those cigarette lighters in cars

Steve said...

Superman's Powers
- XRay Vision
- Fast
- Strong
- Laser Eye Beams
- Flight
- Cold Breath
- Can't Be Hurt

Jedi's Powers
- Reflexes
- Telekinesis
- Mind Control

Advantage: Superman

tem said...

"do you have a DC converter? cuz you know the only plugs they have are like those cigarette lighters in cars"

of course.

also i'd have some batteries.

tem said...

and the robot from rocky IV.

blue said...

i'm not getting involved this this superpower discussion

blue said...

I would have the robot that screech built

tem said...

"Advantage: Superman"

clearly.

iceman would also be cool. npi

El Padrino said...

"It was probably somewhat amusing. 7 years ago I got Laser Eye Surgery, still stands as the second best decision I ever made."

3 years from me, i misremembered

wow 7 years ago, must have cost 20K then and they used a pick and ax

blue said...

I have an interview today, should I ask if the dude's mom is a hooker?

tem said...

"I would have the robot that screech built"

clearly, that's why i wouldn't have it.

he only built one.

tem said...

steve would have the robot calvin and hobbes built.

blue said...

9 years ago, it cost the same as it does today, roughly 1K an eye...why you wouldn't do both eyes i don't know

El Padrino said...

9 years ago didnt even know it existed

tem said...

"wow 7 years ago, must have cost 20K then and they used a pick and ax"

2K and they used a lazer pointer pen thing.

El Padrino said...

"9 years ago, it cost the same as it does today, roughly 1K an eye...why you wouldn't do both eyes i don't know"

wow

i pad $5000, it was $2500 an eye

tem said...

"I have an interview today, should I ask if the dude's mom is a hooker?"


no, say you know she is a hooker and ask him if her prices went up lately.

El Padrino said...

who did yours Dr. Nick from the Simpsons?

tem said...

"i pad $5000, it was $2500 an eye"


that's caput mundi inflation for you

tem said...

"who did yours Dr. Nick from the Simpsons?"

no, he is a cartoon

tem said...

black scrubs did mine

Steve said...

"steve would have the robot calvin and hobbes built."

hu?

Steve said...

"must have cost 20K then and they used a pick and ax"


ha

blue said...

some asian dude did mine

Steve said...

"I have an interview today, should I ask if the dude's mom is a hooker?"


no you shouldn't be interview a dude to begin with. there has to be an equally qualified hot chick. or maybe even a less qualified hot chick.

tem said...

he has to interview a dude every now and again to keep up appearances.

tem said...

""steve would have the robot calvin and hobbes built."

hu?"


its a shitty robot.

a coffee can head, some tinker toys and a tape player.

blue and i would get good robots, you'd get a shitty one.

tem said...

you get it because you were the only one here.

tem said...

except el pad, but he annihilated his robot.

blue said...

fucking annihilate it

Steve said...

"blue and i would get good robots, you'd get a shitty one."


no my friend. ya'll are accountants i'm the engineer.

my robot would rock!

blue said...

little known fact


the game the nuggets won on Wednesday was the first "elimination game" they've won in the carmelo era.

fucking annihilate them

blue said...

steve would not be able to finance the building of his robot

tem said...

he lacks the excess?

tem said...

"no my friend. ya'll are accountants i'm the engineer.

my robot would rock!"

your robot would get bogged down in the design process.

you'd try to add too many gadgets and run out of funding before you finished it.

it'd never get out of the testing stage.

tem said...

engineers never say "close enough"

accountants always say it.

El Padrino said...

fucking ny tax

El Padrino said...

never thought to shop out of state

El Padrino said...

not smat*

tem said...

you could have saved $1g by doing it elsewhere

tem said...

could have vacationed in hilton head with the wife.

gotten laser surgery and the money you saved would have paid for the whole vacation.

tem said...

*lazer surgery

tem said...

wall

tem said...

so jug and zeke are now both blocked at work?

annihilate their work

blue said...

zeke doesn't have yob and jug is just too lazy

blue said...

you would think the lack of a job would increase LOV time

blue said...

maybe nasa got smart and realized that LoV is a threat to national security

blue said...

i think i'd like to have sex with an asian chick

Steve said...

i thought Zeke had a new job and was being a "good worker" for the first few weeks.

Beth said...

"could have vacationed in hilton head with the wife."

Keep shopping in NY ep.

tem said...

"i think i'd like to have sex with an asian chick"

whys that?

blue said...

asian chicks just look like they'd be fun. especially the asian chicks in pornos

blue said...

that's the only thing on my "list" that i didn't "accomplish" before marriage

Beth said...

"i think i'd like to have sex with an asian chick"

Just have cmblue pull her eyes sidewise and drive very slowly and tentatively wherever she goes; it'll be close enough and you won't have to cheat to do it.

tem said...

"Just have cmblue pull her eyes sidewise and drive very slowly and tentatively wherever she goes; it'll be close enough and you won't have to cheat to do it."

hilarity

blue said...

beth has had an asian chick obviously

El Padrino said...

beth i dont appreciate you showing up late to my post

El Padrino said...

they are AWFUL drivers

wft

Beth said...

"beth has had an asian chick obviously"

Actually no but I've also wanted to.

ns

El Padrino said...

WAYYY to much work for a friday

lov rules are not being abided

tem said...

sounds like beth and blue could share and knock 2 things off of blue's list.

El Padrino said...

Actually no but I've also wanted to.

ns

^^

me to

heard it taste like a jasmine flower rubbed with ginger

Steve said...

"i think i'd like to have sex with an asian chick"

"Actually no but I've also wanted to."

"me to"



haha been there, done that.

marriage sucks.

blue said...

asian chicks did not fall for blue's tricks in college

El Padrino said...

you have the clap though so it evens out

Steve said...

although she was an american so it was just like a regular chick.

a fresh off the boat asain would be cool. especially if she didn't speak english.

blue said...

either that or they have a built up immunity to date-rape drugs

blue said...

i bet if i went to asia, i could make it happen

Beth said...

"i bet if i went to asia, i could make it happen"

EP would be normal height in Asia.

Steve said...

"either that or they have a built up immunity to date-rape drugs"


funny

kod said...

From HS until cmkod, I pretty much dated Asian women exclusively

I think a lot of that was for height reasons though; hard to find non-Asian women under 5'3" or so

kod said...

oh, I dated one Mexican chick


but that's pretty much the same

tem said...

good story

tem said...

" hard to find non-Asian women under 5'3" or so"

exfemtem is about 5'3"

tem said...

cgtif is 5'8"


waaay different. i never imagined things would be so different.

at first the mechanics of things baffled me.

Beth said...

How tall are you tem?

tem said...

5'11"

tem said...

or maybe 5'10 and 29/30th

tem said...

cgtif can wear 3 or 4 inch heels tops.

tem said...

4 if i am wearing some shoes with a thick sole

tem said...

otherwise 3

Beth said...

"5'11"

Showoff!

/ep

El Padrino said...

5"11 is broderline short according to these pshychos in LOV and if I gel my hair up jersey shore style me and tem are the same height

face

kod said...

4 if i am wearing some shoes with a thick sole

cmkod is about the same height then; it is funny when she busts out the huge heels, she towers over me by almost a foot

tem said...

if i put my hair up i am 5'11" and 1/29th

kod said...

I'm 5'6", but can be at least 5'10" if I spike my hair real high or get electricuted

Beth said...

"I'm 5'6", but can be at least 5'10" if I spike my hair real high or get electricuted"

Same here.

tem said...

if i jump i am well into the 6 foot range.

tem said...

probably over 7 foot.

El Padrino said...

but not athletic

Beth said...

Fucking annihilate that jump.

Beth said...

Wow, a 1/2 hour wall.

Keef said...

"5"11 is broderline short according to these pshychos in LOV and if I gel my hair up jersey shore style me and tem are the same height"


Someone has a complex

El Padrino said...

says you

tem said...

yeah he said it

El Padrino said...

he's a pshycho

i know he likes that word

Meiz said...

"Joe Torre's nose or Bob Uecker's nose? Who would win?"


YOU WATCH YOUR MOUTH.

Bob's having heart surgery today, for godsakes

Steve said...

"Bob's having heart surgery today, for godsakes"


mehhh. heart surgery isn't what it used to be.

tem said...

it is when you are his age

Steve said...

homemade southern chicken n dumplins for lunch.

you boys don't know anything about that.

Meiz said...

"Jedi's Powers
- Reflexes
- Telekinesis
- Mind Control"


Hey retard, ever heard of The Force?

Spaceman Spiff said...

"i pad $5000, it was $2500 an eye"

fucking annihilated

Spaceman Spiff said...

off to sin city, ill pour one out for bob

Steve said...

"Hey retard, ever heard of The Force?"

WOW. Meiz loves him some Star Wars i guess.

- Reflexes
- Telekinesis
- Mind Control

these are the powers that the force gives a jedi.

and if you spent a little less time jacking off to princess leia and a little more time out in the real world you might could get yourself a REAL LIVE GIRL.


but i wouldn't bet on it.

tem said...

"but i wouldn't bet on it."

it is -160

Meiz said...

"these are the powers that the force gives a jedi."


Shoot lightning out of hands. Super sweet light saber skills. Does not have the weakness to kryptonite.

Steve said...

it was all in jest Meiz. just messing around. put your nerd saber back down.



you win.

Meiz said...

"it was all in jest Meiz. just messing around."


Yes, I understand this. Do you really think I take fun stuff that seriously?

Beth said...

"homemade southern chicken n dumplins for lunch.

you boys don't know anything about that"

No but this girl might.

Steve said...

"No but this girl might."


true, true.

Beth said...

And who made those homemade dumplings? No way it was you.

Steve said...

"And who made those homemade dumplings?"


marketing chick's grandmother. i think all the woman does is cook. every week or so we get leftovers.

Meiz said...

This bitch needs to hurry up & call back about that new apartment

Keef said...

hsil moving out tomorrow


E


O


W

JFreak said...

"YOU WATCH YOUR MOUTH.

Bob's having heart surgery today, for godsakes"

Says the person who cheers when Ron Santo is ailing.

Can't do one and get mad about the other.

Keef said...

"Can't do one and get mad about the other."


Obviously you've nerve heard of Pecosian Logic

JFreak said...

Not Top 10 is great.

El Padrino said...

"you boys don't know anything about that."

steve pretending there are only southern style cooks in nurf* carolina

i've had that before
delicious

JFreak said...

"steve pretending there are only southern style cooks in nurf* carolina

i've had that before
delicious"

You pretend that the only good pizza, good italian, good anything comes from New York.

Okay Pecos, Jr.

Steve said...

"steve pretending there are only southern style cooks in nurf* carolina"


yep. and our new york pizza is just as good as yours

Beth said...

"You pretend that the only good pizza, good italian, good anything comes from New York."

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Just imagine EP if any of us had said we had fantastic authentic NY pizza where we live. You'd have laughed at us.

Steve said...

EP just walked right into that one.

Meiz said...

"Says the person who cheers when Ron Santo is ailing."


Ron Santo is a glorified cheerleader. He has zero broadcasting ability.

Steve said...

"He has zero broadcasting ability."


The Force is not strong with him.

JFreak said...

What's your point, Meiz?

Meiz said...

"What's your point, Meiz?"


I hope Ron Santo dies mercilessly at the hands of a drunken buffoon on Waverly.

JFreak said...

Okay Pecos.

El Padrino said...

"You pretend that the only good pizza, good italian, good anything comes from New York.

Okay Pecos, Jr."

no i dont

i humor you when you say you can get good pizza where you live

cuz i know you can get something close

El Padrino said...

"Just imagine EP if any of us had said we had fantastic authentic NY pizza where we live. You'd have laughed at us."

didnt i link a great pizza rest for you awhile back?

Steve said...

"A 12-year-old California boy was strangled by a rope in his family's kitchen, apparently the latest victim of a teen fad known as "The Choking Game.""


i did some pretty dumb shit when i was 10/12/30 but how could "the choking game" ever seem like fun.

Steve said...

yep. leaving early today.

Keef said...

"i humor you when you say you can get good pizza where you live"


sounds like an apology accepted moment

El Padrino said...

of course it does

Meiz said...

Blam. Looking at a very suite place on on Tuesday. Only $450/month

Meiz said...

Crigslist Jilarity

Steve said...

Fuck It. I'm leaving now.

tem said...

bye steve

tem said...

choking game = natural selection

tem said...

Though ESPN was unable to confirm details of the conversation, SI.com reported Friday, citing two sources familiar with the situation, that Ireland asked Bryant -- during a talk about Bryant's upbringing and relationship with family members --- what his father did for a living when Bryant was growing up, which prompted this exchange:


Bryant: "My dad was a pimp."

Ireland: "What did your mom do [for a living]?"

Bryant: "She worked for my dad."

Ireland: "Your mom was a prostitute?"

Bryant: "No, she wasn't a prostitute."

tem said...

when it is laid out like that it doesn't sound so bad...

of course who knows how it really went down.

tem said...

and i see bert went two weeks without being in the news so he had to get in there.

needs surgery to play again.

nobody cares...

tem said...

that guy is one big attention whore.

Meiz said...

KOD, FIND THIS WOMAN

tem said...

flight book to ATL.

$260.

tem said...

run a trot line?

tem said...

always thought it was trout line.

shows what i know.

El Padrino said...

"Blam. Looking at a very suite place on on Tuesday. Only $450/month"

make sure it has mold

kod said...

nobody cares...

I do; the entire Vikes season hinges on whether he comes back, and if he can play near the level he was at last year.

I doubt the Vikes do better than 8-8 without Favre

tem said...

fine, nobody else cares

El Padrino said...

"Favre appeared emotionally devastated after the loss and said it was highly unlikely he would play again. Now his future remains very much in doubt once more."

give me a break wwl

kod said...

KOD, FIND THIS WOMAN

find her? Shit, I married her

Keef said...

"Blam. Looking at a very suite place on on Tuesday. Only $450/month"

When I lived in OH, my apt was like $400/mo. Can't get a shitty apt for that out here

Meiz said...

"When I lived in OH, my apt was like $400/mo. Can't get a shitty apt for that out here"


This place is a dream location for me. On the main drag in downtown Burg above the cultural center. Rooftop deck, FTW.

El Padrino said...

arnie

El Padrino said...

meiz

Meiz said...

Kopp's is aight. I prefer Hefner's.


Kopp's is the touristy joint.

Meiz said...

But Solly's makes THE butterburger. The ketchup & mustard just slides off the damn thing.

El Padrino said...

"A man in India claims to have gone 70 years without eating or drinking a single thing. The Indian government is conducting tests on the 82-year-old-man to see if he really is existing without any sustenance, hoping to use their findings to train soldiers on how to go without food and water in an emergency."

temdiet has nothing on this guy

tem said...

rooftop deck is cool

tem said...

i think a crash temdiet is in order.

from sat night through the next sunday it will be crash temdiet.

El Padrino said...

no idea what this is but Mike Tyson drinks tea and turns down a canoli

El Padrino said...

that was strange

Meiz said...

Looks like a spoofy thing from Versus

Meiz said...

I had to teach some dude how to shake dice at the bar last night. He got a bunch of solid ::flame sharks:: when he said he didn't know how.

El Padrino said...

like c-lo or craps?

Meiz said...

17/20

Meiz said...

"like c-lo or craps?"


Bar dice

El Padrino said...

yeah i don't know what the fuck bar dice is

El Padrino said...

15-20

bet keef will get sound of music right away

kod said...

"17/20"


19/20

-can't believe I missed (insert spoiler here)

kod said...

really though, the one I missed was a movie I saw within the last 6 months. I thought it was jar jar on an airplane actually

Meiz said...

LP with the quick spoiler

Meiz said...

Bar dice

Meiz said...

Loser buys a round of shots

tem said...

0/20 -tem

Meiz said...

"0/20 -tem"


S?

El Padrino said...

couldnt even get ET tem?

El Padrino said...

alien? moon? kid on a bike?

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