Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Ha!

Joke

Apple announced today that it has developed
a breast implant that can store and play music...
The iTit will cost from $499 to $699, depending
on cup and speaker size. This is considered
a major social breakthrough, because women
are always complaining about men staring
at their breasts and not listening to them.


Miley Cyrus

I think Miley is a necessary evil. As a nation we need something/someone to entertain the 8-13 yr old girls. If left unentertained these girls would bother/annoy everyone else. So I thank Miley for that. Not that many 8-13yr old girls would talk to me, but if one ever does I can just say something about Hannah Montana and then leave the room.

Girl's Hoops

Is UConn like -700 to win? I gotta bet $700 to win $100? Is it even worse than that?

Soccer

Beckham got hurt. 4 people in this country cared.

NFL Talk

The NFL said Monday the Giants will play on Sunday afternoon, Sept. 12, and the Jets will host a Monday night game the next day.

I seriously hope the weather is nice. If it is raining and the Giants tear that field up then the whole NFL will be embarrassed on Monday. And don't give me this crap about this is a brazillion dollar field nothing can harm it....If it rains hard enough the field will get tore up a bit.

Seems like the easy solution would be to have them play each other....I know that messes with the NFL schedule which is worked out way in advance, but whatever. They probably could have figured something out.

NHL Talk

Washington has the most points, it must be the best team. San Jose is second best, followed by the Blackhawks. Good job guys.


I was gonna do some sort of NCAA preview here but decided against it. Mostly because I am lazy, but also because I am keeping my gems to myself. Actually it was all because I am lazy. I will say this. Big East teams let weaker teams hang around too much. Especially WVU. I wouldn't pick the Big East teams to go far. Of course since I said that it means the final 4 will be all Big East teams....I am a horrible game picker.

507 comments:

1 – 200 of 507   Newer›   Newest»
Beth said...

"Beckham got hurt. 4 people in this country cared."

I was one of those 4, and no, not cause he's "hot". He's now out of the World Cup and if he had been able to play he'd have been the 1st English player to play in 4 of them. That kinda stuff just interests me.

Beth said...

And for what it's worth, I think Miley is kind of out for many young girls, but I'm not sure who the new big thing is for them, maybe Taylor Swift.

But it's probably good that tem is not too in-tune with what 8-13 year old girls like.

tem said...

i saw on espn they said he had like 114 caps for england.

then said he had like 20 goals.

wft is a cap?

Beth said...

(What the hell, might as well go for the natty.)

The Iditarod is about to finish up soon and it looks like they're about to have a 5-in-a-row champ, Lance Mackey.

tem said...

also i thought that the opposum thing made it look like the opposum was crying piss tears.

which made me laugh.

then i felt bad because it was mean to piss on it.

Beth said...

Damn you tem.

Beth said...

A CAP is an appearance in an international game I'm pretty sure.

tem said...

why do dudes named lance keep winning races nobody cares about?

Beth said...

And speaking of the Iditarod, here's the closest there is to an Iditarod hottie.

Pretty cute I'd say. (And Meiz, she's from Wisconsin!)

tem said...

there was a bullrider named lance. he was good. he died. god must have gotten pissed because lance was supposed to race in the 24 hours of Lemans horse edition.

tem said...

is the iditarod hottie a picture of a dog?

tem said...

CAP seems like a worthless stat.

Beth said...

"is the iditarod hottie a picture of a dog?"

Well she may be a bitch for all I know, but she's no dog.

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

field turf tem

impossible to rip it up

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

the itit was funny

well done

blue said...

another glorious day

blue said...

why do the negroes have a college fund?

why isn't there a united caucasian college fund?

isn't the fact that they get all the athletic scholarships enough?

blue said...

and I thought Negro wasn't PC

blue said...

I need steve to weigh in on this

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

bhitler is back

suite

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

al sharpton says the blacks dont get the same opportunity as the white man

Steve said...

"and I thought Negro wasn't PC"

depends on the context.

like, "Yo, my Negro...how's it hanging?" is ok

But "Hey, look at all those negros" will probably get ya a ::left hook::

Steve said...

"Joke"

funny

Steve said...

"Miley Cyrus"

i visited my sister a couple of years ago, my neice (she was 9) thought i was the coolest uncle because i knew who she was.

Steve said...

"Pretty cute I'd say"

^^^^^^^

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

she's a little slut now

i;e miley

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

no hot water shower this morning

that really twists my sack

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

path train sucks too

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

fuck this shit

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

4 more days

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

can't wait until i'm sitting at a table throwing clay around

Steve said...

speaking of kids.

new neighbors moved in over the weekend. i got home for work yesterday and their kid's bike was in my parking spot. it's not assigned parking but it's my space.

poor kid, he has no idea how petty and imature i can be...might end up costing him a bike.

Jugdish said...

handicapped space?





s

Beth said...

Every guy's worst nightmare - your wife or girlfriend or boss insist you go to a classical music concert scheduled for the same time as a huge game you really wanted to see.

Heineken set up such a situation regarding a big soccer match in Europe and the result is pretty funny I thought.

Beth said...

"it's not assigned parking but it's my space."

And the kid is supposed to know this how?

Steve said...

"And the kid is supposed to know this how?"


trial and error

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"World's smallest man dies... "

dont fret guys this is false, i'm ok

Steve said...

dude was 29 inches tall.

that's crazy.

tem said...

"field turf tem

impossible to rip it up"

bullshit. and i said don't give me that shit.

tem said...

if field turf was indestructible they'd make the space shuttle out of it.

tem said...

but they don't, so don't give me this shit that field turf can't be ruined by a big ass storm.

tem said...

if field turf was so great they'd rebuild new orleans with it.

Steve said...

"if field turf was indestructible they'd make the space shuttle out of it."

or bullet proof vests

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

cool heineken ad

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"if field turf was indestructible they'd make the space shuttle out of it."

i didnt say that

tem said...

"no hot water shower this morning

that really twists my sack"

it is because you think field turf is indestructible.

God is teaching you a lesson.

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

your a damn fool

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

the field is rubber

they cant make the space ship out of rubber you spider monkey

I ♥ poisonous nuts said...

Vikes and Twins play on field turf

it has held up pretty well so far, Minneapolis had a lot of snow and rain last year

tem said...

i was unaware that rubber was so indestructible and could not be tore up by weather.

i will email everyone i know in hurricane areas and tell them that if they want their shit to be safe from hurricanes they need to install field turf.

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

the scientist is wrong

tem said...

"Vikes and Twins play on field turf

it has held up pretty well so far, Minneapolis had a lot of snow and rain last year"

how many times have the vikings played back to back games on it?

especially after the 1st day was a huge storm.

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

a field made from rubber and synthetic grass cannot be detroyed by guys running on it for 2 hours in the rain

cmon tem, your* better than this

tem said...

you are an idiot for thinking that a big enough rain storm coupled with people running on it for 2 hours will cause no damage.

Meiz said...

"And for what it's worth, I think Miley is kind of out for many young girls, but I'm not sure who the new big thing is for them, maybe Taylor Swift."


Bieber

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"you are an idiot for thinking that a big enough rain storm coupled with people running on it for 2 hours will cause no damage."

ok

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

meiz has the low-down on the 8-3 year old genre

I ♥ poisonous nuts said...

how many times have the vikings played back to back games on it?

especially after the 1st day was a huge storm.

-my comment was (s), you know, because they play in a dome

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

*13

tem said...

"ok"

apology accepted

Meiz said...

"Pretty cute I'd say. (And Meiz, she's from Wisconsin!)"


Nice to see she fixed her hair up for the official photo

Meiz said...

"can't wait until i'm sitting at a table throwing clay around"


Us normal people will be in tents. Sucks to be you.

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"apology accepted"

so you think

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"Us normal people will be in tents. Sucks to be you."

you and bo jones going camping this weekend?

Meiz said...

Please Allah, let this happen.

tem said...

"so you think"

no i accepted it. just google ruined field turf and you'll see all sorts of examples.

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

jesus meiz

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

jesus tem

Meiz said...

"jesus meiz"

You've been asking for it

tem said...

i was going to make a joke about planes and field turf but stayed away from that.

tem said...

meiz came in with a double dragon though.

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

it's not funny

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

if i died in a terrorist attack you wouldnt feel good

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

the threat is real people

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

jackoffs

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

zeek you peep game on the mike lewis 60 minute interview sunday?

I ♥ poisonous nuts said...

"#11 Minnesota is actually favored by a point over #6 Xavier, and yet only 30% of people (on yahoo) have picked them."

-I don't know much about Xavier, but am SAS that we are favored

blue said...

purdue as the 4 seed is a 6 pt dog to Sienna

I ♥ poisonous nuts said...

purdue as the 4 seed is a 6 pt dog to Sienna

-wow; I know Purdue was seeded way too high (should have been an 8 or 9 IMO), but still, a 13 seed giving six is crazy

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

perdew is gonna wreck siena

this is why i wish i was betting again

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"-I don't know much about Xavier, but am SAS that we are favored"

and you should be, before minny woke up and played well the past three games werent they shit

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

zeke

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

Lewis meticulously explains how Wall Street bond traders effectively duped the ratings agencies into giving mortgage bonds backed by “garbage’’ mortgages their highest ratings, effectively turning Main Street lead into Wall Street gold. The traders then sold these bonds to unsuspecting investors who believed the ratings. These toxic bonds were eagerly insured by the likes of AIG, which would end up on the hook for billions in losses."


so simple

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"Did Politics Sink Matt Damon's 'Green Zone'? "

yes, people want to go to the movies to be entertained not to be swayed politically

I ♥ poisonous nuts said...

before minny woke up and played well the past three games werent they shit

pretty much; they were decent at the beginning of the season (beating Butler, losing to Texas A&M by 1)...but after Al Nolan was suspended for the season, things got pretty bad for a while

tem said...

terrorists don't attack new jersey so you are safe.

I ♥ poisonous nuts said...

but if I were a betting man, I would stay away from the Gophs completely, they are incredibly inconsistent.

Meiz said...

"and played well the past three games"

Were you watching the same game?

I ♥ poisonous nuts said...

"and played well the past three games"

Were you watching the same game?

-they played well in 4.5 of their last 5 games (murdering Iowa, Penn State, Purdue, beating Michigan State, and hanging within 3 of Ohio State at half). The last half of the Big-10 championship was brutal...of course, I have to give Ohio State props, they were lights out

Meiz said...

wall

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

all kinds of food rules from different cultures

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"Were you watching the same game?"

drugs

Meiz said...

Do you take John Wall or The Villain #1 overall?

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

The Atlantic

is a quality site

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

next beer bet i make will have to include the Long Island brewery I've just started trying

i tried some bluberry shit a year ago, didnt like it but just rekindled the romance with the award winning toasted lager

i need to share this with the world

keef if i lose the mets bet can i do half kielbasa and a 6 pack of this stuff?

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

even though i know you've not been drinking for whatever reason you have to try it if you like beer in general

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

trying a turkey burger for the first time in my life tonight

tem said...

hmm, tiger officially will play the masters.

good to know.

we knew all along.

tem said...

"trying a turkey burger for the first time in my life tonight"

my advice. don't.

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

i was thinking, even though i have no idea what they taste like, to add some shredded potato in the mix because i dont think they'll taste very good

so like a turkey potato burger

Jugdish said...

trying a turkey burger for the first time in my life tonight


i used ground turkey when i cook here and there...i have no problems with it

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

Tiger, Masters

go crazy

Meiz said...

I have a friend who will only eat turkey or chicken sausages.

Needless to say, we're not nearly as close as we once were. That, and his wife is a snooty bitch.

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

he said, it's where he needs to be

Spaceman Spiff said...

mini earthquake this morning, slept through it

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"That, and his wife is a snooty bitch."


slap that ho

Spaceman Spiff said...

"Andre Agassi told ESPN The Magazine's Rick Reilly he was "out of line" and apologized for poking fun at Pete Sampras during a charity match last week."

meiz, do you accept his apology

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"mini earthquake this morning, slept through it"

saw that, 4.1

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

Tiger now has 18 holes to plug.

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

that masters, assuming he makes the cut, will be the most watched ever

tem said...

not really a high bar to get over

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

Thanks to Top Chef, Gillespie’s farm-to-table restaurant, Woodfire Grill, is often booked six weeks out. Gillespie’s next project: a barbecue joint just a few blocks away in an old auto repair shop. Due to open in November, the spot – which he says will be named with Atlanta in mind – will have no menu; he’ll roast two Berkshire hogs a day, rotate side dishes, and when the food’s gone, it’s gone.

Meiz said...

Filling out brackets is a pain in the ass

I ♥ poisonous nuts said...

meiz, do you accept his apology


aitch

Steve said...

good job, jug

Meiz said...

"meiz, do you accept his apology"


I suppose.

Spaceman Spiff said...

stevefast

Steve said...

busted

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

sony is crazy with that mike jackson deal

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

turn the beat around

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

this place is like an old buick with 250K miles on it

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

too much stalling

I ♥ poisonous nuts said...

Busted? Seriously?

-The officer reported seeing the driver "standing on the break", that they could smell burning rubber from the breaks and that the break light was constantly on.

-Toyota has not been able to replicate the sudden acceleration in any tests; why would this test be any different?

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"But if health care reform passes, I am going to revise my thinking -- and you know I think it will -- especially because immigrant amnesty will cause the health care system to be overloaded and our taxes to soar. - Jim Cramer"

suite

S

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

fucking immigrants

isiah thompson said...

zeek you peep game on the mike lewis 60 minute interview sunday?


nerve* heard about it, I just started his book last night.

Meiz said...

"sony is crazy with that mike jackson deal"


Crazy like a fox

Keef said...

"how many times have the vikings played back to back games on it?"


Shame on you, tem

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

that john edwards sex tape shows him eating her box

isiah thompson said...

that john edwards sex tape shows him eating her box, it sucks though, they don't show the dong.


*fized

Steve said...

"Busted? Seriously?"

"According to Toyota, while Sikes' front brakes were worn away, his rear brakes were "fine," and a reading of electronic data from Sikes' car showed that he had applied the brakes and the accelerator alternately at least 250 times."

i'm calling bullshit on this dude.

Keef said...

"perdew is gonna wreck siena"

'splain "wreck"

Keef said...

"keef if i lose the mets bet can i do half kielbasa and a 6 pack of this stuff?"

Sure

I enjoy getting things that I don't like
(s)

Keef said...

"even though i know you've not been drinking for whatever reason you have to try it if you like beer in general"

I'm not taking a break from drinking. I just rarely drink

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

she's kind of hot, the GQ interview with Rielle Hunter

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"I'm not taking a break from drinking. I just rarely drink"

why

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

'splain "wreck"

double digit win, up at 20 at one point

Keef said...

"why"

I just don't. No reason

Keef said...

"double digit win, up at 20 at one point"

Bet?

Keef said...

I'll give you odds. 1 week for you, 3 weeks for me. Unlimited name changes

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"Bet?"

no too particular, how bout we just bet that perdew covers the spread

Keef said...

"no too particular, how bout we just bet that perdew covers the spread"


I have no interest in that

Keef said...

Siena is -160 to keep the game within 20 pts

Steve said...

"she's kind of hot, the GQ interview with Rielle Hunter"

I read this morning she was bitching and moaning about the spread in GQ. something about not knowing she wasn't wearing pants when the photographer was taking the pics.

I couldn't understand her logic

Keef said...

wall

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

i'm really hungry for bad food

good thing jersey city sucks and there isn't any

Steve said...

not having any bad food seems like a good thing.

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

well it's not bad food, it's just bad for you

mickey d's, kfc, good chinese, etc

I ♥ poisonous nuts said...

"Esquire has posted its 64 candidates for the title of "Sexiest Woman Alive," and readers are afforded the opportunity to vote for the most deserving entrants. The slate is set up in the same style as the NCAA tournament, with the 64 contestants given seeds ranging from 1 to 16.

Most of the names are unsurprising: Megan Fox, Blake Lively and Christina Hendricks are a small sampling of the contenders. One name, however, stands out: Lane Kiffin, the 34-year-old male USC football coach who infuriated all of Tennessee when he bolted after just one year to take the job at Southern Cal.

Should Kiffin win the prestigious honor? He's currently trouncing 1-seed Natalie Gulbis in Esquire's

-chuckle

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

there is a five guys joint

Keef said...

Don't yog* on the beach when you go, beth

Keef said...

Broncos' Quinn wants to start


Good for him

isiah thompson said...

Christina Hendricks


bazongas!

Keef said...

crazy

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

ROMANCE

update

St patricks thing fell through

Plan B, our local church followed by a surprise trip somewhere far

blue said...

oh, somewhere far...you mean, like Midtown?

Keef said...

"Plan B, our local church followed by a surprise trip somewhere far"


Just renew them in Vegas.

2 birds, 1 stone

Beth said...

"Don't yog* on the beach when you go, beth"

I saw that, scary stuff in that I have definitely run on the Hilton Head beaches many times. Just crazy.

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"Just renew them in Vegas.

2 birds, 1 stone"

gambling, too distracting

also catholic church

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

anybody been to Bermuda?

Meiz said...

Our 2 FedEx guys are cool as hell.

that is all

Keef said...

"anybody been to Bermuda?"

I flew through the triangle once when I was going to Vancouver

Keef said...

"Our 2 FedEx guys are cool as hell."


don't dip your pen in the company ink

Meiz said...

Wait. You're renewing your wedding vows after how long?

Keef said...

A lengthy pursuit of a pickup truck throughout west Phoenix Tuesday morning ended when police trapped the vehicle and took into custody 13 men on board, all of them suspected illegal immigrants. Eight of them were hidden under plywood in the truck's bed, authorities said.
The pursuit lasted more than 30 minutes and stretched some 10 miles as the driver tried to elude officers using the freeway and surface streets. At one point, the truck nearly struck a motorcycle officer, officials said.



10 miles in more than 30 minutes? Wow, they must of* been cruising

s

blue said...

"anybody been to Bermuda?"

i'm sure

Keef said...

ha

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"Wait. You're renewing your wedding vows after how long?"

no, we weren't married in a catholic church and she wants to
so was thinking of making that happen now that she has all stuff she didnt have before

Keef said...

IN YOU FACE, BETH

Keef said...

TP should get re-married in the catholic church

Meiz said...

Fuck I'm tired.

Keef said...

mize
Why is BCS copying LOV?

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

i'm kind of not caring about it
much more excited to go somehwere for our 5th

Keef said...

"i'm kind of not caring about it"

There's the romance

Beth said...

"Our 2 FedEx guys are cool as hell."

But are they Bomani Jones cool?

Meiz said...

"mize
Why is BCS copying LOV?"


Wha?

Keef said...

"much more excited to go somehwere for our 5th"


Didn't you get married in 2008?

Meiz said...

Wow. Quite the coincidence.

Keef said...

"Wha?"


Let it sink in

Keef said...

TWSS

Keef said...

I really don't want to pick KU to win it all

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"Didn't you get married in 2008?"

thats you

Keef said...

Pudge plays for the Nats now?

Meiz said...

"I really don't want to pick KU to win it all"


I do. They're way better than everybody else. Or so I've heard.

Keef said...

"I do. They're way better than everybody else. Or so I've heard."

Yeah, I know that. I mean because I can't stand them

Keef said...

2008 was a big year. Wedding, jugvorce, and temgagement all in 1 year

isiah thompson said...

"Our 2 FedEx guys are cool as hell."



corporate will not be happy

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

where did kod just go?

cah-lee-fornia?

tem said...

"Shame on you, tem"

shame on you.

Keef said...

watcht* Raw for the first time in forever last night. Batista and some other douche have a small diamond nose piercing. WFT?

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

peeped game on vegas keef

MAD CHEAP

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

"watcht* Raw for the first time in forever last night. Batista and some other douche have a small diamond nose piercing. WFT?"

batista might be fag
ns

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

but of course spending money would be the issue and that would jack it up

Keef said...

"where did kod just go?

cah-lee-fornia?"



No. Venice

Keef said...

"peeped game on vegas keef

MAD CHEAP"



Yeah it's redonk right now

I'm dumber then a 3st grader said...

so instead of an island for say, $4000 all in, i can get to vegas for $1000 then bring 2K cash for spending money

2K should last 5 nights

maybe i'll even shave off a night

not sure she wants to go to vegas though but i do and i'm married too

Keef said...

"but of course spending money would be the issue and that would jack it up"


Just stay away from the -160 bets

Keef said...

block

Keef said...

bold

Keef said...

bnew

«Oldest ‹Older   1 – 200 of 507   Newer› Newest»

Top Of The Page Material:

"Idiots with nothing better to do"





"Most Boston sports fans are just douchebags. Because most people from New England are douchebags." - tem





"Obama got elected because of the Rooney rule" - Jug





"you should never let debt stop you from pro-creating anyway" - El Padrino





"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H





"i'm dumb and sensitive. basically i'm a woman" - L Padrino





"I'm so horny this morning. If there wasn't this sex offender list going around id grope bitches on the train this morning" - L Padrino