Running diary

Here we are again at the as. shaped mansion. I’m sitting here with a glass of code red and cmk is laying next to me. The dogs are having a tug of war with a piece of rope. Apparently the winner of the rope gets first dibs on the doggy bed tonight or some shit.
So this guy from SNL wit the huge teeth is hosting the show tonight. I really don’t think he’s funny at all. Jimmy Fallon told him that he laughs at his jokes too much.

9:03 – The show starts with a bunch of spoofs. Halfway through he gets naked and sticks his as. in Justin Timberlake’s face. Mize just got jealous
9:05 – I guess the host’s name is Andy Samberg. Or Samburg. He’s probably Jewish. And he just told the crowd they can fart if they want. That was his best joke of the monologue. I wish I was kidding.
9:08 – Jew guy is trying to rap and he called Megan Fox ugly. I hate him even more
9:10 – First award is presented by Anna Faris and some dude from the Star Trek movie. I don’t like Faris as a blond. The award they’re presenting is for best breakthrough performance for a female. What a stupid show.
9:11 – I just realized that I’m running a diary for the MTV Movie Awards. There is no reason why I should be watching this show. I watched it last year because hsil was in the crowd by the stage so we were trying to see her, but this year I have no excuse. I’m that bored.
9:12 – Transformers 2 exclusive premier trailer looks fucking suite. I’m uber pumped.
9:15 – Cmk just axed what I was doing. ::flank stare:: is in the house.
9:17 – It’s been mentioned here before, but The Hangover looks hilarity. I told cmk that it’s based on my bach party. More ::stank glare::s
9:19 – Shia LeBeaf is wearing a skinny tie. Skinny ties must be making a comeback because I’ve seen them a lot on TV lately.
9:20 – This Twilight movie must be pretty popular because every time it’s mentioned, all the little kids start screaming like…well…little kids. The chance that I’ll watch that movie is < than EP’s vertical stature.
9:23 – EMINEM!!!!!! Fuck you, mize. Eminem is the king shit. But he made MTV censor “rape”, “assault”, “murder”, and “nuts”. Thanks Janet!
9:29 – GI Joe also looks pretty suite-like.
9:35 – This fucking show is awful. Now Jew guy is pretending he’s Springsteen, singing some lame ass song.
9:36 – Now the fat kid from Superbad is on stage and he’s wearing a skinny tie. This trend is awful. I bet EP doesn’t have any skinny ties.
9:37 – Another category, another person from Twilight winning. Why is this shit so popular with the kids? Did Miley Cyrus write it?
9:39 – Another show about Paris trying to get a BFF? ISBNS
9:40 – Cmk just farted. I tolt her I was putting that in the diary. She was not amused. That’s a big NS.
9:45 – This goddman show isn’t even half over yet. But as a special treat to all of you, this diary is almost over.
9:54 – Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds present the award for “Here I am. I was famous once. Don’t forget about me”.
9:56 – People from Twilight won another award. Something about a kiss or something. Then they get on stage and act like they’re gonna kiss again. Like, OMIGOD, this is so exciting!!!
10:00 – Chris Isaac and Leeann Rimes are onstage singing now. We must have gotten mize’s time masheen to take us back to 1997.
10:02 – Now Forrest Whitaker is singing. They’re singing about dick in a box. I guess this jew guy is the guy that made that. So he did 1 funny thing in his life.
10:03 – Hayden P is presenting the WFT award. No, really, they have a category called the WFT Award. Hayden just dropped the f bomb about 10 times. I like her even more now.
10:07 - OK I'm done now. I can't watch any more of this shit. I will nerve get that hour of my life back.

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