Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Thanks for.....

showing up New Orleans....wow 58 points. You suck. At least you shot free throws well. Maybe you guys should try something different next game. I don't know what, but anything is better.

showing up Utah Jazz....maybe next year. Everyone knows you never had a chance, so you can hold your head high that you didn't get swept.

showing up San Jose Sharks...weren't you supposed to win the Cup? You didn't even make it 7 games with the 8 seed. Good work, except the exact opposite. Really though you were up against the flying V and Emilio Estevez, so what are you going to do?

trying Pirates bullpen...you stunk yesterday. But so far as a Pirates fan there isn't much complaining to be had. On all fronts they are better than expected. Yay!

that idiotic ad on WWL right now...best rates! Today 7%, yesterday 5%. Umm wow, today is 2% higher than yesterday? If it is that volatile I suspect that today's 7% isn't the best rate.

the idiotic admin lady here that needs me to send her the same documents over and over and over again. I guess she is some sort of job security for me.

the idiots who keep calling me and making me stop writing my post....except NOT. Fuck those idiots and fuck AXE.


Obama.


the following tem movie review:

Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian


Umm wow, talk about a movie title that takes the fun out of a tem review...dang. Hell they might as well just throw all the dialogue in there too. I'm not even sure I really need to explain this movie, but whatever, that's what I am here for.

This movie is predictably about a night at a museum. Inferring from the title one can deduce that the museum is the Smithsonian. Also one can infer that there is a battle there. Basically this is the whole plot. Evil terrorists couldn't get any more planes to crash into El Pad's buildings so they go after the museum....but they got another thing coming because Robin Williams is there. Yes indeed, second only to Chuck Norris in men killed is Robin Williams. First he starts talking and then he never shuts up. Your ears fall off and you bleed out like Sean Taylor (what? still too soon???). Personally I'd rather just get the Norris kick to the face, but whatever, some people deserve the Robin Williams death and they get it. That's right Robin Williams kills the terrorists before they can steal the Darth Vader outfit from the Smithsonian.

Also Ben Stiller was there, but his wife wasn't so nobody cared.

2 helmet stickers out of 5.

583 comments:

1 – 200 of 583   Newer›   Newest»
Jugdish said...

Blackhawks advance!

tem said...

does chicago even care about hockey anymore?

Blueshon said...

what's hockey

tem said...

if you don't know by now, then you'll never know.

tem said...

unless you find out later.

tem said...

in which case you would then know.

tem said...

and not have the need to ask that question anymore.

tem said...

although you never put a question mark on it.

tem said...

so maybe it was not a question at all.

tem said...

i am going to assume that the question mark was implied.

tem said...

it seems like a safe assumption.

Jugdish said...

does chicago even care about hockey anymore?



they do now

tem said...

but assumptions are dangerous.

tem said...

awww, jug ended my early morning run.

Jugdish said...

YES!

Jugdish said...

Apparently buzzing the tower is not as funny in NYC as it was in Top Gun.

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

safe to say

Jugdish said...

Whoever approved that is a moron though...no cents at all.

tem said...

bah, plenty of sense.


NYers need to not live in fear. if they live in the fear then the terrorists win. NYers are just rolling over and letting the terrorists win. they have no marbles.

Jugdish said...

bah, plenty of sense.


makes more cents to just do the photoshop thing.

tem said...

nothing beats the real thing.

tem said...

from a $$$ standpoint though, yeah photoshop was the way to go.

tem said...

honestly can't believe el pad has not taken the bait yet.

Blueshon said...

i still think it's funny

Blueshon said...

terrorist have won...NYC lives in fear every day.

I, on the other hand, applaud when low flying jets come through Downtown Denver.

Blueshon said...

that's also because they're usually doing a fly-over for a sporting event, so applause is necessary

Blueshon said...

fly-overs don't seem to work very well at the pepsi center though...

but they show them on the bigscreen as the fighter jets fly over the arena

Blueshon said...

it could just be stock video though too, because the fly-over seems to be the same, and it's daytime out, and the game is usually at night.

tem said...

blue knows.

Blueshon said...

i think i'm being bamboozled

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"honestly can't believe el pad has not taken the bait yet."

swimming past the hook today

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

spiff you all over the GTA Chinatown game or what

Blueshon said...

why you always gotta make a chinaman joke


i mean, it's not like anybody says "hey ep, you all over that GTA lil italy, version"

tem said...

el pad is just letting the terrorists win.

tem said...

must not love the U S of A.

tem said...

wants to know about Chinatown instead.

likes their New Year's. Wants to bang a China lady.

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"why you always gotta make a chinaman joke"

wasnt a joke, valid question

tem said...

wants to eat with chopsticks.

wants to study with Mr. Myagi.


doesn't realize Myagi is Japanese.

Blueshon said...

i've been to chinatown

tem said...

did you want t move there?

Blueshon said...

myagi son was from okinawa

Blueshon said...

no, i did not want to move there.

but there were lots of dead ducks hanging in winders

Blueshon said...

btw-

robin williams death is the worse

tem said...

hahahaha. dolphins releases John Beck.

They might actually want Pat White as a QB.

tem said...

"myagi son was from okinawa"

i am under the impression this is in Japan.

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

"Christ, Rev. Leave it to the old fart to make the dirty jokes."

Jesus mize, you're probably the only person here that wouldn't have thought anything dirty about your comment

Blueshon said...

pat white could be really good.

tem said...

"but there were lots of dead ducks hanging in winders"

don't be a duck in chinatown.

Blueshon said...

i never said that okinawa was not in japan, nor did i say it was

Blueshon said...

keith gets the "random comment of the day" award.

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

I did give csil the finger at the bar, though. She was a drunk sloppy mess

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

Fucking chihauahas*

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

I was thisclose to punching an old jew bitch in the face this morning

ns

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

"To me and my family, he is a loving and caring person and in the eyes of the law and the constitution, he is innocent until proven guilty beyond a reasonable doubt," she said in a statement Monday. "I just can only hope that the criminal justice system will not be overwhelmed and persuaded by what is being put forth in the media."


Yeah, stupid evidence gets in the way every time

tem said...

i never said that pat white could be really good., nor did i say that pat white couldn't be really good.

tem said...

"I did give csil the finger at the bar"

knowing the as. this could mean anything.

tem said...

"I was thisclose to punching an old jew bitch in the face this morning
"

bitch didn't have your money?

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

"knowing the as. this could mean anything."

mize told me to give her the finger last night. I assumed it was a dirty comment, so did rev. mize meant flipping the bird I guess

Blueshon said...

exactly tem...escpecially knowing the cmkeith family

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

"bitch didn't have your money?"

yes

Jugdish said...

mize meant flipping the bird I guess



knowing the as. this could mean anything

tem said...

why didn't you punch the old jew lady?

Jugdish said...

ep is a giver

Jugdish said...

It seems like we have been hearing about Obama's first 100 days for over 100 days now.

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

There were a lot of witnesses. Humane society has a mobile clinic where I was taking the dog to get neutered this morning. Supposed to drop them off at 7am so I got there about 6:30 and there was a line of about 20 people. So the line is moving forward and this old bitch walks up and gets in line about 5 people behind me. As the line moves forward, she creeps up and eventually she's in front of me. I didn't see her until she went up to the table to fill out the form. So i go up to fill out the form and the lady said that they didn't have any more room, that old bitch was the last one they took. So I was walking back to my car and walked past her and called her a fucking bitch.

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

Mize

tem said...

you got cut by some old lady in a dog neutering line?


i am nearly 100% sure i would have never guessed that is why you were going to punch her.

tem said...

old bitch cut like 5 people and fucked them over.

hilarious for everyone but those 5 people.

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

"you got cut by some old lady in a dog neutering line?"

exactly

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

woe is me

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

why neuter the dog

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

Historian Julian Zelizer says it's too early to say if Barack Obama's presidency will be a success



No shit?

tem said...

i was also completely unaware that mobile dog ball cutting off places existed.

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

"why neuter the dog"


Bob Barker tolt me to

tem said...

"Historian Julian Zelizer says it's too early to say if Barack Obama's presidency will be a success
"

maybe for him.

i could tell you all right now what is going to happen. but won't.

Jugdish said...

I got cut by some sweet little old lady in a motorized cart...and I didn't even see it coming!


fixed

tem said...

does drew carey say that at the end of the show now or does he just ask where his check is?

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

"i was also completely unaware that mobile dog ball cutting off places existed."

Me too. But it's like $80 compared to about $200 at a veterinary hospital

Jugdish said...

i was also completely unaware that mobile dog ball cutting off places existed.



kind of like those places that fix cracks in your windshield

tem said...

funny thing is that the dog has a completely different view of this old lady and he is telling a great stories to his dog friends.

Jugdish said...

Me too. But it's like $80 compared to about $200 at a veterinary hospital


its a lot cheaper when they don't use and pain meds

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

Yeah, definitely a stay of execution for the pup

Jugdish said...

funny thing is that the dog has a completely different view of this old lady and he is telling a great stories to his dog friends.



hilarity

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

Woe

tem said...

here's the scene:


some old angel lady gets in line behind this as. that was going to get my nuts cut off. she could see it in my eyes that i didn't deserve to be neutered. so she slides in front of the as. and saves my balls. i'm going to send her a fruit basket.

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

O:FB continues

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"Bob Barker tolt me to"

i know, never understood it

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

Dog has a little more spring in his step this morning

tem said...

"i know, never understood it"

the terrorists want the dogs to keep mating. if you don't nueter your dog you are supporting the terrorists.

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

"i know, never understood it"

makes them less aggressive, won't hump everything, and won't have puppies

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"makes them less aggressive, won't hump everything, and won't have puppies"

well obviously, it seems cruel though

what if someone decided that you should not have kids and cut your balls off, that would be bad no?

also you can make like 5 grand if you let them make babies

save the balls

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

"what if someone decided that you should not have kids and cut your balls off, that would be bad no?"


Well I asked him but he's unable to talk

Steve said...

the terrorists have won?

dammit!!!

i knew this would happen.

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

Matt* Sanchez wearing a Mess jersey and a Jess hat yesterday whilst throwing out the first pitch was grate*

tem said...

"also you can make like 5 grand if you let them make babies"

i imagine this kind of depends on the dog.

mutts aren't going to bring you $5k, no matter how many bitches they knock up.

Jugdish said...

the two go hand in hand

Blueshon said...

stupid matt sanchez...already becoming a douchenozzle

tem said...

"Well I asked him but he's unable to talk"

maybe he just won't talk to you.

after all you are trying to get his nuts cut off.

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"mutts aren't going to bring you $5k, no matter how many bitches they knock up."

ok 2 grand

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

"also you can make like 5 grand if you let them make babies"


When I bought him, the breeder gave me a deal if I agreed not to breed him.

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

How is it different than getting a vasectomy? They both are probably gonna hurt for a few days afterwards

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"When I bought him, the breeder gave me a deal if I agreed not to breed him."

that guy is a nazi

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"How is it different than getting a vasectomy? They both are probably gonna hurt for a few days afterwards"

you choose to get a vasectomy and probably after you have kids

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

i'm just saying, if i had a dog
(AHIK), i couldnt do it

Blueshon said...

top girl on GHM today has huge teets.

Blueshon said...

ep needs one more eye

tem said...

is he a cyclops?

Blueshon said...

maybe

Blueshon said...

chipotle's kids menu is not very appealing...where's the mexican toy?

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

"you choose to get a vasectomy and probably after you have kids"

I'm not sure if you've ever had a dog before, but they don't make a lot of decisions on their own

Blueshon said...

what if your kid doesn't want a taco or a quesadilla

Blueshon said...

they choose where to shit and who/what to lick

Blueshon said...

so about as many decisions as mize makes in a day.


wadr meiz.

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

A bronze statue was unveiled yesterday at Churchill Downs of the race’s 2006 winner, who died after a lengthy battle with a hoof condition. Barbaro’s ashes are buried beneath the sculpture, which stands near Gate 1, next to the Kentucky Derby Museum.

The artwork is being called a first, because it shows the horse in midair, with no feet touching the ground.

Blueshon said...

why is the horse jumping?

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"I'm not sure if you've ever had a dog before, but they don't make a lot of decisions on their own"

so your saying you want someone other than yourself to choose whether or not to have your balls removed?

Blueshon said...

and does a statute of barabaro look different than a statue of mr. ed...or secratariat, or seattle slew?

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

"so your saying you want someone other than yourself to choose whether or not to have your balls removed?"

That's actually nothing like what I said

Blueshon said...

he got married...same thing as having your balls removed.

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

I didn't buy a dog to breed him. I bought him to have as a pet.

Blueshon said...

does the hamburger you eat choose to be slaughtered


does the swine flu you catch choose to kill you

does the plane choose to crash into the building

humans control everything

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

Top of the food chain, motherfucker

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

i saw a guido walking a tiny white dog yesterday

it was refreshing

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

little dogs be the gayness yo

spaceman spiff said...

"what if someone decided that you should not have kids and cut your balls off, that would be bad no?"

dogs arent humans

"When I bought him, the breeder gave me a deal if I agreed not to breed him."

of course they dont want their customers to breed the dogs, so they can be the ones making the money, everyone gets that 'deal'

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

USC Song Girls

I want to live in Brooklyn, NY said...

"dogs arent humans"

Exactly


"of course they dont want their customers to breed the dogs, so they can be the ones making the money, everyone gets that 'deal'"

Everyone except EP

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"Everyone except EP"

and alot of other people

Blueshon said...

it's like that non-compete clause that the frenchies wanted EP to sign

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"of course they dont want their customers to breed the dogs, so they can be the ones making the money, everyone gets that 'deal'"

my question would be how the fuck would they know

Blueshon said...

oh, they'd know....they'd know


they can pull AKC records, and you'd need that if you were going to sell your pups for any real $$$

Meiz said...

EP,

Never get a dog.


Regards

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"they can pull AKC records, and you'd need that if you were going to sell your pups for any real $$$"

black market no

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

oh i get it

everyone is right, el pad is wrong

i love this game

tem said...

HUNGRY

Keith S said...

"black market no"

If you're selling a pure bred, people aren't gonna pay the money for that w/o getting documents showing the dog's lineage.

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

life after people looks dumb

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"If you're selling a pure bred, people aren't gonna pay the money for that w/o getting documents showing the dog's lineage."

makes sense

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

what if you cross breed, mkae some mutts

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

mutts live longer

Keith S said...

"what if you cross breed, mkae some mutts"

Instead of selling for a grand, you sell for $50

Meiz said...

EP's Dog owner's checklist:

Rape stand

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"Instead of selling for a grand, you sell for $50"

how bout a pet lizard or something

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

i had an iguana, he was a cool dude

Blueshon said...

i don't know, a lot of celebs want mutts now, so that'll be the next big thing, i'm sure.

isiah thompson said...

I, on the other hand, applaud when low flying jets come through Downtown Denver.

hilarity

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

uno, dos, tres, quatro

i know you want me

spaceman spiff said...

the mickey ward movie that was gonna be wahlberg as ward and damon as brother/trainer, bale has signed to play the brother/trainer

Keith S said...

"how bout a pet lizard or something"

They have smaller nuts

spaceman spiff said...

""Powder" is going straight to DVD in June."

hilarity, biel took the role not caring about the nudity because she just had to have the role, thinking it was going to be a great movie

spaceman spiff said...

*powder blue

isiah thompson said...

""Powder" is going straight to DVD in June."


not getting a chance to see those bazongas on the big screen sucks.

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

but, zoom and rewind does not suck

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

La Piazza in Glendale AZ

boys, looked like a 5 star brick oven joint

do patronize and report back

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

this arlen spector news is terrible

Keith S said...

Glendale is like 8 towns over for me

tem said...

"uno, dos, tres, quatro"

shush

tem said...

then something about hellen keller's hips.

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

fucking rev's fault

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"Glendale is like 8 towns over for me"

whoa

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

didnt you have a two day bet

isiah thompson said...

that place is prob 5-10 mins from where I work

isiah thompson said...

Blueshon said...
btw-

robin williams death is the worse


::flank star::

isiah thompson said...

Rodriguez (hip) could play in a minor league game this week and could return as early as May 9, the New York Daily News reports.

tem said...

"::flank star::"

good to know you read the post.

tem said...

"this arlen spector news is terrible"

says you.

isiah thompson said...

apologies tem, I didn't get to the movie review yet.

tem said...

i am surprised you read the other crap at all.

tem said...

beff reads the movie review then goes back to bed.

tem said...

cnn.com has a mock draft for next year out.

wow.

isiah thompson said...

beff reads the movie review then goes back to bed.

I usually wait to see Beff's reaction to the movie review then decide if I'll read in detail.

ns

isiah thompson said...

cbs does too

tem said...

beff doesn't comment on my days.

she only comments early before i post to complain that i haven't posted yet.

Meiz said...

The other crap is the best part of Temposts

Meiz said...

I was really hoping for Cribs: Tem Edition today

Blueshon said...

she also comments if you don't movie review.

she's a typical woman, nothing to say unless she has something to complain about.

Blueshon said...

"I was really hoping for Cribs: Tem Edition today"

meiz is scoping out the guest bedrooom, see if it's someplace for HIM TO GO

Meiz said...

Hell to the yes.


I bet tem could use a little mortgage relief bailout.

Jugdish said...

I bet tem could use a little mortgage relief bailout.


tem would become the new deluxe

tem said...

old man in the office says the whole economy is going to shut down due to pig flu.

tent city here we come.

tem said...

"I was really hoping for Cribs: Tem Edition today"

i'm down for doing this next week.

tem said...

"I bet tem could use a little mortgage relief bailout."

who couldn't?

tem said...

i told old man in the office to "put the mat away" and just got a blank stare.

tem said...

i'm getting real tired of news outlets making up outrageous shit and then me having to discuss it with people.


if 90M american die from pig flu then.....


that's a huge fucking if right now since i think right now 0 americans have died from it.

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

swine flu scare tactics dont work

go away media

isiah thompson said...

swine flu scare tactics dont work

go away media

takes away the focus of Osama and lets him have another "yo peep game homie, no need to worry" press conference that he does so well at.

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

"takes away the focus of Osama and lets him have another "yo peep game homie, no need to worry" press conference that he does so well at."

definetely setting up a OBAMA saves the day press conference

funny how he went to me-he-co nine days before this shit hit the fan

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

take THAT conspiracy theorists!

Meiz said...

PIG FLU!!!


Bossman's friend got married in Mexico last week. His new wife has the pig flu.

NS

isiah thompson said...

IN YOU FACE!

not sure if already linked

Jugdish said...

cnn.com has a mock draft for next year out.



they have Tebow going to the Skins...suite

tem said...

"His new wife has the pig flu."

is she dead now? should i go get a tent?

Jugdish said...

Paulus to Michigan and Tebow to the skins would not be a good year for you would it zeke?

Jugdish said...

meiz will have the swine flu soon, but he will discover the cure



cheap vodka

isiah thompson said...

cnn.com has a mock draft for next year out.


he's got a Philly vs San Diego Superbowl.

Ewing Sucks Donkey Dong said...

meiz will never know he has the swine flu because he has no insurance

whoe

isiah thompson said...

Gints as a NFC Champyunship game participant

isiah thompson said...

diddo* NE

no way SD ever beats NE in the playoffs.

isiah thompson said...

block

isiah thompson said...

block

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Top Of The Page Material:

"Idiots with nothing better to do"





"Most Boston sports fans are just douchebags. Because most people from New England are douchebags." - tem





"Obama got elected because of the Rooney rule" - Jug





"you should never let debt stop you from pro-creating anyway" - El Padrino





"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H





"i'm dumb and sensitive. basically i'm a woman" - L Padrino





"I'm so horny this morning. If there wasn't this sex offender list going around id grope bitches on the train this morning" - L Padrino