Thursday, February 05, 2009

I went on the in ter net

My new favorite song






I cannot wait for spring training.

I know all of you are excited Notre Dame signed the #1 LB recruit.

486 comments:

1 – 200 of 486   Newer›   Newest»
Steven said...

Hand banana.

El Padrino said...

wft

Beth said...

That chick in the Dear Deer video was on Scrubs this week. But I'd still have to agree with EP - wft??

El Padrino said...

freak you need some ass

tem said...

i couldn't watch the deer video past 10 seconds. i got too bored.


japanese pitch was funny.

El Padrino said...

lebron james is good at playing basketball

Meiz said...

Good effort, Freak

Meiz said...

s

Meiz said...

stupid bridge

blue said...

the bridge is nice

El Padrino said...

love the bridge

blue said...

freak's post is solid

blue said...

let's see steven try and pick this one__apart

Meiz said...

_I_had_to_cross_the_Brooklyn_Bridge_for_Junior's_cheesecake_

Meiz said...

Epic. Fail.

El Padrino said...

it's what we've come to expect

El Padrino said...

madoff list, completely

Meiz said...

"Shoulda used that money to get a new car."


Your mother.

blue said...

zillow.com has me intrigued

i can look at everyone's home values/prices (if i know their address AHIIK)

Penn is a little bitch said...

"I know all of you are excited Notre Dame signed the #1 LB recruit."

Except he was the #2 LB

El Padrino said...

Bob Costas walks into a bathroom and strolls up to the urinal. (Yes, even in the joke, he doesn’t pee sitting down.) While he’s going, he notices Michael Jordan is next to him. Bob takes a peek over and goes, “Jesus Christ, man. You’ve got a massive dick!” Jordan, unfazed, replies, “Hey, man, I appreciate that! It’s not hard to do for yourself, either, you know?” Costas asks, “What do you mean?” Jordan replies, “Well, I have a little secret nightly routine that I do. Right before I go to sleep at night, I stand at the corner of the bed, pull down my pants, and smack my dick against the bedpost three times. I do that every night. That’s how I got my dick so big over the years. You should try it out for a while, see how it turns out.” Costas is amazed. “Why, thank you Michael, I will indeed try that out!”

Later that night, Costas and his wife are getting ready for bed. She darts into the bathroom for a few minutes, and this gives him his chance. He walks up next to the corner of the bed, right next to the bedpost, and drops his pants. He winces a little bit because he knows this might hurt a bit, but then he grabs his dick, and *THWAP* *THWAP* *THWAP*

Costas’ wife calls out from the bathroom, “Michael, is that you?”

tem said...

"zillow.com has me intrigued"

a very fun site for the nosy.

El Padrino said...

cowboy bashing from cowboy newspaper, yes!

El Padrino said...

who determines those property values on that site?

blue said...

"who determines those property values on that site?"

it just takes comps in the area and uses some algorithm or some crap to determine the value

Meiz said...

"Except he was the #2 LB"

Fox Sports Radio told me that he was #1.

Penn is a little bitch said...

Rivals has him #2

El Padrino said...

algorithm is solid blue

Penn is a little bitch said...

Either way, he's going to ND instead of USC so he'll turn out half as good

El Padrino said...

"Yesterday while i was walking downtown I noticed a Subway and a Papa John's right next to each other, it was then did I realize that I should be carrying Malatov Cocktails at all times."

in case no one reads my blog, i thought this would get some laughs over here

Meiz said...

I laughed at your spelting of Molotov. Boom. Roasted.

blue said...

keith is just mad because he thinks the guy who went to ASU is #1

Penn is a little bitch said...

yes, I'm furious

El Padrino said...

bill gates unleashes mosquitoes

El Padrino said...

putin is batshit crazy

in a totally fucked uop i'm scared of this fucker way

JFreak said...

"Except he was the #2 LB"

#2 overall, #1 LB.

Stupid keith. Go as somewhere else.

JFreak said...

I see it's already been talked about that you were using rivals.

So, uh.

Yeah.

Penn is a little bitch said...

"Go as somewhere else."


Go as fuck a sock, douchebag

Meiz said...

Fight Fight Fight Fight Fight Fight

Penn is a little bitch said...

nah. just needed to get that out of my system

El Padrino said...

FIGHFIGHTFIGHTFIGHTFIGHT

Penn is a little bitch said...

EP
Did you go visit the guy in NYC who was handing out money?

El Padrino said...

"EP
Did you go visit the guy in NYC who was handing out money?"

no, ep hates lines and my sob story is not nearly as bad as others in the city

Penn is a little bitch said...

"no, ep hates lines and my sob story is not nearly as bad as others in the city"

Shoulda flown mize out

spaceman spiff said...

hawaii LB is dumb, if you are samoan you are supposed to play defense @ USC and then you will go to the NFL. playing defense for pete carroll vs. playing defense for chet donnelly was a no brainer

blue said...

kod would have gotten $$ fo show

spaceman spiff said...

*chet donnelly, blob version

Penn is a little bitch said...

good call, blue

Penn is a little bitch said...

Chet Donnelly is hilarity

Meiz said...

"Shoulda flown mize out"


Or just mailed me the $50

El Padrino said...

we're going into the hudson audio

spaceman spiff said...

"no, ep hates lines(except betting lines, love them shits)"

*fized

Penn is a little bitch said...

"we're going into the hudson audio"

suite

Penn is a little bitch said...

FAA audio needs more audio

blue said...

a lot of kids from Hawaii go to school in Montana and Idaho...i think they're nucking futs..

guarantee that kids visit to South Bend was in the summer because if he visited in December, he'd be a Trojan

El Padrino said...

transcript

El Padrino said...

good fix spiffer

tem said...

el pad also likes cocaine lines.

and lines used on women.

El Padrino said...

i dont do cocaine
that's slanderous

spaceman spiff said...

"guarantee that kids visit to South Bend was in the summer because if he visited in December, he'd be a Trojan"

thinking the same thing, people from hawaii need to adjust to cali weather, he'll be miserable

JFreak said...

Hawaii kid is apparently Mormon and Weis was the only one who would let him take 2 years off for mission.

tem said...

"i dont do cocaine
that's slanderous"

i didn't say you did cocaine.

i said you liked cocaine lines.

tem said...

i bet BYU would have let him.

El Padrino said...

peyton manning almost kilt jay cutler, for real

JFreak said...

Out of his last three schools.

spaceman spiff said...

"Hawaii kid is apparently Mormon and Weis was the only one who would let him take 2 years off for mission."

chet will do anything to get a top recruit, guess i can respek dat. freak do you know why the kid turned down BYU

Penn is a little bitch said...

"Hawaii kid is apparently Mormon"


After review, spiffs "dumb" comment stands

JFreak said...

"freak do you know why the kid turned down BYU"

Nope.

tem said...

keef hates mormons.

Penn is a little bitch said...

The father said that Manti felt like he would be "too comfortable" at BYU and become too complacent. Several of his cousins already play for BYU, including safety Shiloah Te'o.

Penn is a little bitch said...

Hate is a strong word

Penn is a little bitch said...

my best man is a jack mormon

blue said...

why the fuck would a mormon kid go play at a catholic school?

he'll have to take catholicism courses

Meiz said...

damn mormons

blue said...

"my best man is a jack mormon"

is there any other kind?

Penn is a little bitch said...

"is there any other kind?"

non-jack ones

tem said...

wft is a jack mormon?

Penn is a little bitch said...

jack mormon - A person who is a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, but seldom or never practices their religion. Unlike ex-Mormons or anti-Mormons, Jack Mormons usually support the goals and beliefs of the church and maintain friendships with practicing Mormons, but for reasons of their own choose not to attend church services and activities. Jack Mormons may also indulge in activities discouraged by the church, such as drinking alcohol, smoking, and premarital sex.

spaceman spiff said...

"why the fuck would a mormon kid go play at a catholic school?

he'll have to take catholicism courses"

its becoming obvious he didnt think this through, and his parents didnt help at all, carroll should have pointed this out, but im sure he doesnt bring religion into his recruiting pitches

Meiz said...

"wft is a jack mormon?"


A wannabe Mormon.


blessed be

Penn is a little bitch said...

Carroll should have brought back Norm Chow. He's mormom

tem said...

he should have went to WVU.

tem said...

lunch time.

spaceman spiff said...

so a jack mormom is a regular person that mormons will be friends with, got it

El Padrino said...

how could you be so heartless

Meiz said...

Mrs bossman works with this kid's mom

El Padrino said...

Steve/Steven great dook read

El Padrino said...

that's a smart kid

Penn is a little bitch said...

"so a jack mormom is a regular person that mormons will be friends with, got it"

Nailed it

spaceman spiff said...

those guys would rather have homo secks than have the pics shown to other people? and if they are underage, they could just have threatened to call the cops. they let the dude take pics of the homo activities WFT

spaceman spiff said...

fmlb mock draft is chubtastic

El Padrino said...

7 days pitchers and catchers

spaceman spiff said...

hilarity

5 second porn GIF, NSFW

El Padrino said...

wow a roll pin into a pussy lick

well done

Meiz said...

"hilarity

5 second porn GIF, NSFW"


That's my go-to move

blue said...

how does Deluxe like it?

Meiz said...

that was creative

blue said...

so's your face

El Padrino said...

cumonmyglasses.net

spaceman spiff said...

i thought you got lasik

Meiz said...

Always mind bottling:

You can't walk without a walker, and can't hear...yet you can drive?

Yeah, that seems logical.


America, the beautiful.

spaceman spiff said...

yea there needs to be frequent driving tests for old people

Penn is a little bitch said...

JW

Penn is a little bitch said...

Gonna be another slow day, hey

Meiz said...

stupid old people

Penn is a little bitch said...

Most answered an online ad from the halftime show's producers that read, in part: "We're looking for enthusiastic volunteers to be part of the on-field audience."
What the 2,000 found out is: The "on-field audience" doesn't get "paid."


Rick Reilly is smrt

Meiz said...

Whitlock was good

El Padrino said...

"i thought you got lasik"

funny

Penn is a little bitch said...

"You can't walk without a walker, and can't hear...yet you can drive?"

My mom flew back to Ohio last week because her aunt died. She flew in to Cbus and her uncle picked her up, and they had to drive down to Cincy for the viewing & funeral. She said that her uncle is almost legally blind, and he's the one who drove her down to Cincy. She said they got to the funeral home and went to a viewing, and he walked up to the casket. My mom stayed in the back of the room for a minute and started looking around and didn't recognize anyone. Then she looked at the casket and it was a man in the casket, so she realized they were in the wrong room. 15 minutes later her uncle came back to her and said "I don't think that's my sister". And he's the one that drove 90 miles to get there

ns

El Padrino said...

Leitch refelcts on that Buzz / Costas tag team debacle from Costas Now

El Padrino said...

so her uncle is stevie wonder

suite

tell your mom i'm sorry her aunt died

Penn is a little bitch said...

"so her uncle is stevie wonder"

He's blacker

Penn is a little bitch said...

"tell your mom i'm sorry her aunt died"

Thanks

blue said...

yeah, everytime I volunteer i get pissed when i don't get paid.

blue said...

old people die, it's the circle of LoV

Penn is a little bitch said...

I don't think they need to die, just stay off the road so they don't kill me

Penn is a little bitch said...

lull

Steven said...

Tonight. You.

Penn is a little bitch said...

Etta James is pissed

El Padrino said...

i like using whup/whupped in my vernacular

tem said...

who is etta james?

Penn is a little bitch said...

"who is etta james?"

RIF

El Padrino said...

AAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTT
LLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSTTTTTTT

my love

has comeandgone

El Padrino said...

fantastic song

tem said...

::blank stare::

El Padrino said...

the real temlonely

El Padrino said...

ettajames bible

Penn is a little bitch said...

"::blank stare::"

Read the goddman article you mize bastard

JFreak said...

"he'll have to take catholicism courses"

This is not true.

blue said...

"This is not true."

absolutely true

you have to take theology courses as part of the core cirriculum.

I guess if he doesn't want to graduate, he wouldn't have to take them.

tem said...

"Read the goddman article you mize bastard"

i'm not a scientist.

tem said...

you don't have to take them, it is the brenden fraiser exemption.

JFreak said...

It's not strictly catholic.

But it's not mormon at all, so that won't help him.

El Padrino said...

Timmy Duncan is piss scared of sharks

blue said...

i'm not a righter

blue said...

"It's not strictly catholic."

this is true, but typically they are taught by the catholic priests or nuns that are employed by the school, so there is a catholic slant

blue said...

father ed

Penn is a little bitch said...

Your face is a slant

tem said...

he is asian?

Penn is a little bitch said...

"Weis was the only one who would let him take 2 years off for mission."

That will work out pretty well for whoever is coaching them in 2 years

El Padrino said...

“The Texas Rangers and Sheets reached an agreement on a two-year contract late last week and only a physical stood in the way of the deal being completed. But everything changed once it was determined that Sheets had a torn flexor tendon that might require surgery.”

why didnt sheets take care of this already

blue said...

a lot of those kids don't go back to the school they previously attended after their mission

unless they went to bYu

Penn is a little bitch said...

Maybe his mission will be in Indiana, then he can play

blue said...

yeah, the people who end up with shitty missions like "glendale, CA" woould scuk

El Padrino said...

i'm on a mission to find nerd ropes

JFreak said...

why does volquez has a gun

anyone speak spanish?

Penn is a little bitch said...

Why don't you has a Spanish/English dictionary

JFreak said...

have, even.

El Padrino said...

it on whatever island he is from, they all have guns

El Padrino said...

just ask ugeth urbina

JFreak said...

didn't urbina use a machete?

Penn is a little bitch said...

Ugueth Urbina is from Venezuela

Penn is a little bitch said...

Urbina allegedly attacked five farm workers on his property whom he had accused of stealing a gun, and tried to injure them both with a machete and by attempting to pour gasoline on them


blessed be

Penn is a little bitch said...

Although both doesn't match 5

Meiz said...

dum dum is truly a horrid customer service representative.


The worst

JFreak said...

the both is referring to the machete and pouring gasoline.

Penn is a little bitch said...

"the both is referring to the machete and pouring gasoline."

Ah, yes. RIF

El Padrino said...

pouring of gasoline is underated

El Padrino said...

first big ten win last night freak

blue said...

pouring gasoline on people doesn't hurt. it's the lighting them on fire that hurts.

Penn is a little bitch said...

Gasoline hurts when it's poured into a wound

Meiz said...

It was 2 guys. Ugie and his boys tied 'em up, gasolined 'em, burned 'em, and told the dudes they could jump in the pool to extinguish themselves.


It was on RealSports or Costas Now this summer.

Penn is a little bitch said...

"first big ten win last night freak"

Tom Crean makes me laugh. I watched the tOSU/IU game last weekend, and that boy is wound pretty tight.

Penn is a little bitch said...

"It was 2 guys. Ugie and his boys tied 'em up, gasolined 'em, burned 'em, and told the dudes they could jump in the pool to extinguish themselves"

Are you questioning the bible?

Penn is a little bitch said...

I need to eat something

Bigface said...

Remember. Tonight.

Meiz said...

"Are you questioning the bible?"


Unfortunately, yes.

Bigface said...

All I know is ball....and good.....and rape

blue said...

toonces rocks

blue said...

ball don't lie

tem said...

pool's over there if you want to stop being on fire.

blue said...

why does andy have a better recollection of the urbina events, than the the bible.

Steven said...

I want my name to be spaghetti

tem said...

then change it.

Penn is a little bitch said...

"I want my name to be spaghetti"

Is scuba getting old?

Meiz said...

"why does andy have a better recollection of the urbina events, than the the bible."


Must be because I watched the episode 3 times.

Dude's living the good life in his little prison. A/C, satellite TV, runs the basketball team, gets to fuck his hot girlfriend...all sorts of shit.

Penn is a little bitch said...

Some dumb chick here was just talking to someone and said "Oh, you're from Wisconsin? One of my best friends lives in Kentucky"

spaceman spiff said...

steven = bigface and fucked up login?

Penn is a little bitch said...

bigface could be mize

Penn is a little bitch said...

or rev

Meiz said...

"steven = bigface and fucked up login?"


most likely

Meiz said...

I'm nonna them

tem said...

maybe it is your mom.

Penn is a little bitch said...

his mom does like to underscore

tem said...

keef, how is the facebook crap coming?

blue said...

i figured bigface was freak's buddy.

in de face

basically because he was a "contributor" at a bunch of shitty blogs that freak always reads.

Penn is a little bitch said...

fmk said she wanted some pearl earrings to wear for the wedding. I axed her if she also wanted a pearl necklace.

I'm really 12 years old

El Padrino said...

conan doing the bruce slide

Penn is a little bitch said...

"how is the facebook crap coming?"

I have friends now.

El Padrino said...

"I axed her if she also wanted a pearl necklace. "

nice work

Penn is a little bitch said...

But some girl in Milwaukee was axing me to send naked pictures to her. I don't think I'm gonna do it.

Penn is a little bitch said...

sarcasm

El Padrino said...

Mammaries

JFreak said...

"basically because he was a "contributor" at a bunch of shitty blogs that freak always reads."

huh?

Penn is a little bitch said...

"huh?"

basically because he was a "contributor" at a bunch of shitty blogs that freak always reads.

Penn is a little bitch said...

golf picks

JFreak said...

i've never read a blog for which a writer was name "bigface"

i used the account "bigstain" to spam shamoff's once. Maybe that's what you're referring to?

blue said...

""huh?""

awful announcing, fire joe morgan, free jim sorgi


those are freak type of blogs

tem said...

"I have friends now."

good work.

In de Face said...

bnewer

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