Tuesday, January 13, 2009

TCS Finals Start Now

That's right, the finals start now. So get to scoring whoever is in the finals. I have to go score the last post now. While I do that I will leave you with a thought. Do one legged people just buy one shoe? Do they have special stores that sell just one or are they stuck with two?? Do they have an Internet site where they can match up with other people and trade? Is there an ad out there "male size ten righty seeking male lefty for shoe trading relationship and possibly more"?

OK scoring the last post now. I'll be back with winners and more witty commentary after these messages!

OK we are back and rolling. Final scores:

el pad 88
keith 141

spiff 23
zeke 110


Keith and Zeke meet in the finals. It will be a good match up for sure, both are west coasters so the opportunities for cheap Zs and walls will be plenty. Right now vegas has Keith as a 10 point favorite. The media is all over Zeke though, "from quitting to winning, the Zeke LOV story" is going to air on Outside the Lines next week, don't miss it.


For the record whilst catching up:
Tem does not have 100 first cousins. Tem has 8 first cousins, 1 of which has passed away, so Tem has 7 living first cousins. I am unsure how anyone could get 100 first cousins.


I find it real funny that now that the DA has come out and said there is not enough evidence to support a case against Marvin Harrison that a whole bunch of people have come forward with evidence. WFT? Where were you all when the cops were looking for evidence in the first place? Stupid "someone else will take care of it" society. A bunch of lazy bastards is all anyone is. This is getting into the pot calling the kettle black range though so I am going to stop.

Let's fast forward 1 year on the NFL coaching carousel....next year it's possible that the Bills will be looking for a new coach, probably the Packers, the Redskins, the Raiders, the Bengals, the Chiefs, the Bucs (says here Gruden is gone) and the Cowboys. That's a lot of coaching turnover and there will be 3 folks out there getting a lot of interest, Shannahan, Cowher and Dungy. I'm just going to go ahead and do some Chris Mortensen style reporting* and say that sources indicate to me that Cowher is leaning towards the Skins, Shannahan is leaning towards the Cowboys and Dungy is leaning towards taking over at Tampa. Sources have also confirmed that once Gruden leaves the Bucs he will be taking over for Jaba the Weiss at Notre Dame.

UFC picks from tem:
Franklin over Henderson
Shogun over Coleman (Coleman will be listed at about +300 for this one, bet small on him if you want, +300 is a good risk)
Lytle over Davis
Kang over Belcher


That's all I have in me today.



*Everyone knows Chris Mortensen style reporting is completely made up. These predictions might happen though and after a few do Tem will be considered an insider and his made up facts will be given about a billion percent more credence than they deserve.

586 comments:

1 – 200 of 586   Newer›   Newest»
Jugdish said...

Giggity

Jugdish said...

EP...don't do it!

El Padrino said...

AWESOME link

El Padrino said...

i would guess they have some sort of one shoe outlet out there

but that seems like a stretch

Jugdish said...

Maybe Footlocker could split up, and have a Feetlocker too.

Steve said...

Last two links where broken, here is another http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,479747,00.html

Basicaly the auzzies gonna pay somebody 100k a year to live on one of their islands and blog about it.

Jugdish said...

I saw that and thought of Deke, but then I remembered he wouldn't drive three towns for bait, so he isn't going to Australia for a job.

El Padrino said...

great job

El Padrino said...

great story

Jugdish said...

Mess Logo

Jugdish said...

other Mess logos considered

El Padrino said...

who cares about the patch though

blue said...

obviously people care

blue said...

my uncle has one leg (ns)

but most one-legged people have an artificial leg that they use for the other shoe. although that shoe doesn't get worn out nearly as much

El Padrino said...

this extortionist eddy curry is dealing with says curry made some sexual advances towards him

it's funny

tem said...

i saw a lot of folks with one leg during christmas.

El Padrino said...

no piece of ass is worth getting stoned over

blue said...

"i saw a lot of folks with one leg during christmas."

it's because of the economic crisis, they can't afford to keep the other leg, so they sell it.

tem said...

i see.

makes sense.

tem said...

but who is buying the other legs?

blue said...

the chinese

Jugdish said...

rich, one legged people

Steve said...

"but who is buying the other legs?"

I’ve been stockpiling artificial legs. When the economy turns around I’m going to sell them to legless cripple people for a huge profit.

tem said...

rich one legged chinamen should be feared.

Jugdish said...

I will use my portion of the redistributuion of wealth to buy an extra leg.

Jugdish said...

most legless cripples don't have a lot of money to buy your overpriced legs steve. That is a bad business plan.

Jugdish said...

idiots

I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO! said...

HELP!!!

blue said...

"most legless cripples don't have a lot of money to buy your overpriced legs steve. That is a bad business plan."

that's true, my uncle is basically a hobo, and he'd rather buy beer than a leg

tem said...

"most legless cripples don't have a lot of money to buy your overpriced legs steve. That is a bad business plan."

he is banking on universal health care to pick up the tab.

Jugdish said...

By then we will all be living in tents and universal health care will be a thing of the past

El Padrino said...

beth adopt this little boy and cash in

blue said...

yeah, tent city is starting to look like a real possibility

I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO! said...

spare change?

Jugdish said...

nahh, you'll just use it to buy booze and bait

tem said...

i'll take you to mcdonalds.

Jugdish said...

maybe even let him super size

blue said...

dollar menuaires

tem said...

"dollar menuaires"

blank stare

tem said...

s

El Padrino said...

avoiding political talk but did i hear there will be a gay bishop doing a prayer at the inauguration?

El Padrino said...

cuz if i did hear that, i'd like to go on record to say that it is a disgrace

Steve said...

gay bishop.

yep, some dude from...New Hampshire, i think.

El Padrino said...

and since when is there concerts before an a inauguaration?

swear on the bible and get to work

El Padrino said...

ok im done

tem said...

i heard that from you.

which is the same as hearing it from mort.

who is a person who gets on TV.

and if it is on TV if it is true.


so it must be true.

I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO! said...

Why would a gay Catholic priest surprise anybody?

Jugdish said...

I heard there will be a shit load og alter boys along with the gay bishop.

Jugdish said...

og=of

Steve said...

"Why would a gay Catholic priest surprise anybody?"

good point. i think he's the only OPENLY gay Catholic priest.

tem said...

he is a bishop, not a priest.

blue said...

see, yesterday i said we should debate religion today, and here we go.

El Padrino said...

"good point. i think he's the only OPENLY gay Catholic priest."

he's nto catholic #1 and #2 it shouldnt be celebrated

blue said...

bishops can only move diagonally

El Padrino said...

i like this

Steve said...

"see, yesterday i said we should debate religion today, and here we go."

not i, religion bores me.

tem said...

"he's nto catholic "

also seemingly true.

blue said...

"not i, religion bores me."

i guess i missed the entertainment value of the political arguments

Steve said...

"entertainment value of the political arguments"

highly entreating. Plus, it's something that actually could affect my day to day life.

Steve said...

*entreating

that's hdh...that kinda still works.

blue said...

oh, you're right, whoever is president makes such a difference in my everyday life. I mean, when obamer takes office i'm going to start driving to work on a chariot pulled by naked women.

Jugdish said...

i'm going to start driving to work on a chariot pulled by naked women.



suite and hilarity

Steve said...

"whoever is president makes such a difference"

it's much more likely to make a difference than the interpertation of a 2000 year old book. at least the president changes every 4-8 years

Steve said...

"i'm going to start driving to work on a chariot pulled by naked women."

i'd rather have the naked women in the chariot with me, but you suite yourself.

blue said...

but then the chariot wouldn't really move

I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO! said...

"I mean, when obamer takes office i'm going to start driving to work on a chariot pulled by naked women."


My chariot is gilded.

Jugdish said...

Steve said he didn't like boobs, I'm not buying this.

blue said...

"it's much more likely to make a difference than the interpertation of a 2000 year old book. at least the president changes every 4-8 years"

really? considering that the president and president-elect have had their views molded by said book?

so in a way, you're just following the religious interpretation of some dude you elected.

Steve said...

Shopaholic dies in avalance of unopened goods.

tem said...

"but then the chariot wouldn't really move"

it might rock a bit.

Steve said...

"so in a way, you're just following the religious interpretation of some dude you elected."

sure, why the hell not.

El Padrino said...

When Ken Caminiti said that 50% of ballplayers were juicing, Rickey said “Well, Rickey’s not one of them, so that’s 49 percent right there.”

Jugdish said...

Really...religion has a better chance of affecting someone's day to day lives than does the President.

tem said...

ricky quotes are > yogi quotes.

tem said...

i dislike people who start work emails with "Hey Guys"

blue said...

i was just trying to get steve to debate religion...

i don't really want to

tem said...

separation of church and state.


bbbeeeeeyotch.

Steve said...

"i dislike people who start work emails with "Hey Guys""

that and "Hey Team"

tem said...

Tony Dungy will be president in 2021.

Raging Tebowner said...

1) Your boy's got some serious gas today. Thank you Taco Bell.

2) Who had the nickname "The Professor" first - John Clayton or the And1 guy?

3) Do the Colts have to interview a white candidate to satisfy the Reverse Rooney Rule?

Raging Tebowner said...

bacon chalupa joint is highly recommended.

blue said...

"3) Do the Colts have to interview a white candidate to satisfy the Reverse Rooney Rule?"

no doubt

tem said...

2) Who had the nickname "The Professor" first - John Clayton or the And1 guy?


the And1 guy.

Raging Tebowner said...

my favorite Rickey story/quote: (paraphrasing)

*Rickey was recently traded and getting onto the team bus for the first time*

guy in the back yelling up to Rickey: "Rickey you can sit anywhere, you've got tenure"

Rickey: "Ten years?, shiiiiiit, Rickey got about 18 years in the league"

I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO! said...

"2) Who had the nickname "The Professor" first - John Clayton or the And1 guy?"



Gotta be DA PAFESSA!

MY GODSON!

El Padrino said...

i want a shamwow

Raging Tebowner said...

Rickey on being selected for the HOF:

"I'm glad I was selected in the 1st round"

Raging Tebowner said...

i want a shamwow

I bought some.

ns

blue said...

"2) Who had the nickname "The Professor" first - John Clayton or the And1 guy?"


they're not the same guy?

I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO! said...

"I bought some.

ns"


did you buy a snuggie, too?

Raging Tebowner said...

no snuggie

isn't a snuggie the same as wearing a robe backwards?

Raging Tebowner said...

god bless Lebron James

blue said...

those blanket things look awesome

I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO! said...

Yeah. Some people can't figure that out, apparently.

tem said...

"isn't a snuggie the same as wearing a robe backwards?"


yes.


tem will buy a snuggie and got sham wow's in his family gift exchange thing.

Steve said...

"isn't a snuggie the same as wearing a robe backwards?"

yea, those things are funny.

and they are gonna make some dude rich.

tem said...

tem doesn't own a robe, snuggie will be dual purpose.

Raging Tebowner said...

how about a Snuggie made out of Shamwow's.


now we're onto something

tem said...

i'm gonna wear my snuggie and look at my bedskirt.

tem said...

"how about a Snuggie made out of Shamwow's."


call the patent office now. right now.

Raging Tebowner said...

fyi: shamwows are just super absorbent felt.

blue said...

except it's better than a robe

El Padrino said...

"i want a shamwow

I bought some.

ns"


AND?

Raging Tebowner said...

AND?

honestly, I forgot I bought them for a while. We keep one of the smaller ones on the frig door handle, when I use it (to wipe off the countertop) it works fine.

I don't wash my car or purposely spill soda on my carpet so I haven't used it much.

El Padrino said...

good lookin

Jugdish said...

Maybe you can get a shamwall

spaceman spiff said...

"good point. i think he's the only OPENLY gay Catholic priest."

hope you didnt actually believe this when you wrote it

spaceman spiff said...

""3) Do the Colts have to interview a white candidate to satisfy the Reverse Rooney Rule?"

no doubt"

on dan patrick they said something abot having language in the contract of the assistant coach excludes them fro having to interview others

El Padrino said...

Braves sign Lowe.

spaceman spiff said...

nice cleave

title has 'hey there' in it, but no phaggotry in the link

El Padrino said...

wow 15MM per year, 4 years

ahahahahahahahaaa

spaceman spiff said...

"Braves sign Lowe."

mess will rue the day they didnt offer lowe a bigger contract

s

Steve said...

"hope you didnt actually believe this when you wrote it"

i did, don't remember 100%, but i think the article said that he was the only openly gay bishop.

El Padrino said...

tell me about it spiff

tem said...

HUNGRY

spaceman spiff said...

"i did, don't remember 100%, but i think the article said that he was the only openly gay bishop."

you said 'openly gay catholic priest', which is impossible, dude would get excommunicated

Steve said...

UNC lost it's first two conference games, lost 2 of the last 3 games, one of which was at home.

And they are STILL in the ap top 5.

Steve said...

"you said 'openly gay catholic priest'"

we where talking about a bishop, meiz and i misspoke. i think tem already addressed this.

blue said...

UNC is better

spaceman spiff said...

"And they are STILL in the ap top 5."

at least theres playoffs for bball

Steve said...

"UNC is better"

i know. it still bothers me though.

Jugdish said...

that has to suck

Steve said...

"at least theres playoffs for bball"

no doubt

I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO! said...

"we where talking about a bishop, meiz and i misspoke."


No, I was being presumptuous just to see if it would get a reaction.

blue said...

i'm going to eat chipotle today

spaceman spiff said...

"“So he suggested the Kansas City Zoo,” Ragan said. “I thought, I know I’m big, but I’m not as big as an elephant. And my husband got mad.”"

not as big as an elephant, but bigger than a human that can use a human MRI. stupid, her husband should be pissed at her

Raging Tebowner said...

“They should have machines that fit most everybody,” she said.

maybe you should lose some wait* fatty.

5 foot 275

goooooolord have mercy

Steve said...

5 foot, 275 pounds

that's a big woman.

El Padrino said...

herpes update story

says he will not say a word, let it be, let it be, and when she ultimately gets it he'll act surprised and go get tested himself then act doubly surprised that he has it

if he rings alarm now he think she'll dump him, but i said she might dump you then too and he was like yeah but at least this buy's me time

who knows what can happen between now and then

and he said the visual stuff has subsided since the meds and will be a non-factor going forward as long as he takes the meds

blue said...

btw-

i think katy perry is smokin hot

spaceman spiff said...

"“They should have machines that fit most everybody,” she said."

hilarity, they do have those machines, most peeps aint behemoths

Raging Tebowner said...

I was hoping we'd get a Dirtball update.

nice.

spaceman spiff said...

"btw-

i think katy perry is smokin hot"

her boobs mustve duped you, they are great themselves

I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO! said...

"i'm going to eat chipotle today"


I'm a hater

Steve said...

aren't std's much more dangerous for women then they are for men?

spaceman spiff said...

"and he said the visual stuff has subsided since the meds and will be a non-factor going forward as long as he takes the meds"

he'll get drunk one day and pull out the meds in front of her, then he's fucked

Raging Tebowner said...

hopefully she won't find the medicine between now and then

Raging Tebowner said...

finding the medicine i2i

El Padrino said...

"hopefully she won't find the medicine between now and then"

he keeps them at work but yeah the risk is there that she'll eventually find them

but he said he's going to keep them in a script bottle that says something different

he's got all bases covered

he's a deviant

El Padrino said...

unrelated, the last time i hung out with this maniac him and his girl got into a fistfight in the VIP section of Tenjune......

NS

Raging Tebowner said...

but he said he's going to keep them in a script bottle that says something different

smrt*

hopefully its not something his chick would ever need

"I took one of those prescription ibuproferen* you had"

"NOOOOOOOOOO!"

spaceman spiff said...

"
he's got all bases covered

he's a deviant"

he's gonna be really paranoid from now on, hiding stuff creates a lot of pressure, hopefully he doesnt snap

I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO! said...

"herpes update story"


I was just wondering about this earlier whilst on the terlet.

Raging Tebowner said...

is his chick hot?

spaceman spiff said...

"
I was just wondering about this earlier whilst on the terlet."

had an outbreak?

Steve said...

"Pregnant women who are infected with either herpes simplex virus 2 (HSV-2) or herpes simplex virus 1 (HSV-1) genital herpes have a higher risk for miscarriage, premature labor, retarded fetal growth, or transmission of the herpes infection to the infant while in the uterus or at the time of delivery. Recurrence in women previously infected with herpes is also common during pregnancy."


he needs to tell that girl so she can protect herself.

Steve said...

and her future children.

El Padrino said...

"he's gonna be really paranoid from now on, hiding stuff creates a lot of pressure, hopefully he doesnt snap"

he loves it spiff

thrives on it

before this girl he was with 3 women at once, not kidding, and was very successful at it

spaceman spiff said...

EP warn him bout the tard babay, is he planning on having kids

I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO! said...

"is his chick hot?"


I think EP said not

El Padrino said...

"is his chick hot?"

no, and i hate her guts
he wonders why we dont chill anymore and i tell him straight up because your girl is a mess son

El Padrino said...

"EP warn him bout the tard babay, is he planning on having kids"

i will, he doesnt want kids and from what he tells me neither does she

but i will cuz that's fucked up

El Padrino said...

i've only seen him with one hot chick, she was the main squeeze out of the threesome

Raging Tebowner said...

if she comes down with the herp in the next few weeks then his "I didn't know I had it story" will sound pretty lame, especially since he was out of town for a month.

El Padrino said...

zeke i've told him every angle, he thinks this is the way to go

let him hang himself, he's a dick
(one of my best friends over the years though, cant deny that, even though we havent chilled in like a year)

it's like obama being buddy buddy with that terrorist friend of his

El Padrino said...

i got stories from the that kid for days upon end

blue said...

EP should send this chick an anonymous note, that way he can have his boy back (figuring she'll dump him, and EP won't hate the next girl)

Raging Tebowner said...

how long has he been with this chick?

marriage plans but no kids plans?

and he pulls box with regularity?

he should tell her and move on.

Steve said...

"EP should send this chick an anonymous note"


Or you could use this

Steve said...

hell, give me her email. i'll register it with the site.

that way you can deniability.

El Padrino said...

"how long has he been with this chick?

marriage plans but no kids plans?

and he pulls box with regularity?

he should tell her and move on."

she's #2 in that three at once thing so bout 4 or 5 years i would guess

hates kids, never even seen mine yet (mainly though because my wife hates his guts)

they are both nuts, deserve each other? he does get box but it's never outstanding box, it's corrugated carboard most of the time

i agree with you though

Raging Tebowner said...

you can deniability.

right* in the email that you were easedropping on a conversation when he admitted he had it.

Steve said...

haha

na, the site sends anoymis email to people telling them they need to get tested.

it won't say he has it, it'll just recomende to her to get tested.

if he's lucky, she's been fucking around and she won't suspect a thing.

tem said...

"i'm going to eat chipotle today"

tem had chipolte today.


by the by the diet has me down about 7 pounds. probably would be more but i cheated on friday.

tem said...

" i've always wanted one of those viatnemese kids so i can teach them to say "me so horny"

hilarity.

tem said...

way to drop the phone number there too.

Raging Tebowner said...

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

El Padrino said...

see what i'm dealing with

El Padrino said...

damn, i should erase that phone number

El Padrino said...

my email to him:

dude the herp for broads is bad news, you have to tell her, retarded kids and shit

*then i linked the wiki page*

his response :

whats wrong with you
whats the matter with u?
what if she gave it to me and i just assumed i got it from the uk?
granted the problem popped up right after but who's to say it was dormant before that?

we aint having kids anyway, especially once she finds out she has herpes

HA!

but serious she dont want them and neither do i, there's always adoption, i've always wanted one of those viatnemese kids so i can teach them to say "me so horny"

tem said...

"what if she gave it to me and i just assumed i got it from the uk?"

valid point.

he should just axe her if she gave it to him.

then just blame dirty sheets in the UK.

El Padrino said...

i said he sould have gone that route immeditely but like i said, women wouldnt buy that and your life would be hell

*if you intedn on being with her, which i guess he does

Raging Tebowner said...

I love how his initial response sounds like he's upset with you.

whats wrong with you
whats the matter with u?

ahahahahahahahahahhahah

El Padrino said...

i dont get it, i know he's told me she's everything and more when they fuck so i guess that's it

El Padrino said...

yeah like i'm immoral and dead wrong

he's such a heathen

El Padrino said...

she's borderline fat
i mean i would call her fat

pretty face, giant tits (but fat?)

giant ass again fat

it's weird

El Padrino said...

when i get home i'll dig up a picture from my wedding

he took her instead of the hot main squeeze

Steve said...

"she's borderline fat"

so, he's marring a fat, bitchy chick that hates oral.

El Padrino said...

luncthime

chicken parm

goddam chicken parm is the troof

El Padrino said...

"so, he's marring a fat, bitchy chick that hates oral."

no plans yet, just engaged but essentially yea

and his exact words were

"hates oral lately" i failed to copy the entire quote

some things we cannot explain ok
like how you hold down a job or like how jug is not president

Keith S said...

Hooooooooooooooo. HO! You's a hoooooooooooo. HO! You's a ho. I said that you's a ho. HO!

Keith S said...

"I imagine that using pesto as the sauce on a pizza is not good. Gross."


It's good.

tem said...

" i know he's told me she's everything and more when they fuck so i guess that's it
"

chances are good he got it from her.

tem said...

chicks don't become everything and more without lots of practice.

Keith S said...

"Right now vegas has Keith as a 10 point favorite"

I'd take zeke +10. No internets access for me at home this week. And I'll be in Vegas all weekend.

tem said...

"hates oral lately" i failed to copy the entire quote"

because his shaft is covered with herpes and she knows it because her vag gave it to him.


all signs point to she gave it to him.

tem said...

"I'd take zeke +10. No internets access for me at home this week. And I'll be in Vegas all weekend.
"

then fire up centsports and make a bet.

Raging Tebowner said...

all signs point to she gave it to him.

I'm starting to think this also.

Keith S said...

"then fire up centsports and make a bet."

No centsports access this week.

Keith S said...

It's like I'm living in the 19th century this week

tem said...

19th century folk do not fare well in the TCS.

El Padrino said...

why the fuck dont you have internet you ape

Keith S said...

Try reading

Keith S said...

AC adapter on my laptop got kilt. So can't turn on my laptop. Had to order a new one online. Won't have it until the end of the week.

Keith S said...

So in the last 24 hours where entreating. Steve thinks that easedropping on terriosts is not of our uttermost importance. suite yourself, though. Hopefully the avalance of steel & concrete doesn't come down on you, that way you can deniability

Keith S said...

Awsome

Keith S said...

That was suite

Keith S said...

You know I'm pushing

Keith S said...

I need pts

Keith S said...

bolder

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