Friday, January 09, 2009

El Pad's Weekly Betting Forum

I fell asleep third quarter, woke up and Tim Tebow was holding up this crystal looking football. Thought it was a dream but it was not. At least the better team won. Unless your Texas, Usc, or Utah. Then you feel like your girlfriend just told you she had a threesome with your dad and best friend. The BCS!

Fox's bowl coverage is horrendous.

Lot's of kids will announce they are foregoing thier senior/junior year and will enter the NFL draft.

I still can't believe Matt Millen is part of the NBC football coverage team as a analyst. It makes as much sense as having Ozzy Osbourne teach an English class. Major WFT. I've always watched ESPN's coverage on football anyway, they are the better. Much much better. But still, it's a slap in the face of the general fan. I mean c'mon. The guy buried a franchise.

Despite not receiving a picture of Beth's tit I am begrudgingly posting this info for the most ridick-ulous fanatsy game ever invented. For those who "follow" golf I have provided you with an update.
ID # = 10597
Password = password

Where I stand
Cash $258 (Damn Colts, THEY WEREN'T WHO I THOUGHT THEY WERE)
Picks 49-48-2

Let's get the easy one out of the way first....

Panthers -10 over Cards ($200)
Little upset I have to lay 10 in a playoff game but these are special circumstances. Cards don't travel well, Warner will see heat (Mike Smith take notes), Carolina can run, Edge will not fair well, Boldin injury = 34-17 final.

Giants - 4.5 over Philly ($150)
I try not to bet on my team because it's a general rule of mine and my thinking is I will always convince myself to take the Giants side. So I'll try and tone it down here. P.S. end result, Giants win. Some points:
  • Baby Rhino is healthy and raring to go.
  • If Webster and Ross can dominate the Giants d line will end up injuring McNabb.
  • If Westbrook has one of his "everything he touches goes for 30 yards" games the Giants, no matter what the Baby Rhino does will end up losing.
  • Punting is big. Feagles is really good.
  • DeSean Jackson in the return game, see Feagles exhibit #4......
  • Offensive line cannot allow more than 2 sacks.
  • Andy Reid can coach topless and not be cold.

Ravens +3 over Titans (Straight Bet $100)
The 2000 Ravens appear similiar to the 2008 Ravens. Does that defense fly around or what? McClain then McGahee = Lendale then CJ. Pretty much, no? Titans had a great year but I just think they might be in over their head's a bit. If the run doesn't work who are they throwing the ball too? Successfully and on third down?


Chargers+6 over Steelers (Straight Bet $100)
I don't like the Chargers but I like the points. This game was tight when they last played and San Diego is playing with house money right now. Very dangerous. The defense can absolutely get to Big Ben and that has been the Steelers achilles heel all year. It's a good thing they have a punishing, fast, smart defense. Otherwise the they wouldn't have any more than 7 or 8 wins.

Weekend advice: Eat cheap mexican food and drink cheap mexican beer.

1,045 comments:

1 – 200 of 1045   Newer›   Newest»
El Padrino said...

i waited long enough

tem said...

fantasy golf won't even let me pick people.

it is all fucked up.

basically i tried twice now to pick people for the tourney and it won't let me.

two times is enough for golf.

tem said...

grats to Tits on the pick em win.

now she gets to see a picture of her tits.

Tyler said...

I hate all of the spreads for the games this week. The games are way harder than normal to pick.

El Padrino said...

agreed t

El Padrino said...

but i'm going 4-0 this week

i feel it

blue said...

where did i finish in the bowl pick'em

blue said...

i love that i picked Ball State to beat Tulsa with a 33 confidence, and they got routed....fuck you whitlock

blue said...

that's what i get for not changing the confidence points....34 on Oklahoma and "Big Game Bob"

blue said...

that's what i get for not changing the confidence points....34 on Oklahoma and "Big Game Bob"

blue said...

san-dieagans? san-deegans?

san-diagoans

El Padrino said...

strawberry jam>>>>>>>>>>grape jelly

blue said...

jam>>>>>jelly

always

El Padrino said...

this place is jumping

tem said...

tem is slammed with TCS again.

El Padrino said...

the transgender on the Real World brooklyn upsets me

El Padrino said...

and i saw two homo's today making out, i almost spilt my cookies

Keith S said...

"fantasy golf won't even let me pick people."

You're best than this, tem. The tourney started yesterday morning. You can't pick golfers once the tourney starts. You know this, MAN!!

Keith S said...

"the transgender on the Real World brooklyn upsets me"

They need the show to be representative of the city

Keith S said...

Some of yous might have missed it last night, so I'll post it again.

Tebow's girlfriend

Keith S said...

Strange

tem said...

"You're best than this, tem. The tourney started yesterday morning. You can't pick golfers once the tourney starts. You know this, MAN!!"

i'll try again next week.

El Padrino said...

that is lucy pinder you fool not tebow's girlfriend

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

idiot

El Padrino said...

you've been bamboozled

Keith S said...

It looks just a lot like this chick

Keith S said...

Maybe his girlfriend is Lucy Pinder

tem said...

his girlfriend is Jesus Christ.

tem said...

vote for the retard

http://www.nba.com/dunk/landing.jsp

El Padrino said...

so he's not dating lucy pinder
he's dating that "this" chick you linked

Keith S said...

I'd vote for the retard if I had a link to click on

Keith S said...

"so he's not dating lucy pinder
he's dating that "this" chick you linked"

Which looks exactly like the chick in the the first pic I linked. Google Lucy Pinder and you won't find that 1st picture anywhere

Keith S said...

Fucking tennis bets are killing me

El Padrino said...

mike lewis piece on madoff, sec, and street

El Padrino said...

"Which looks exactly like the chick in the the first pic I linked. Google Lucy Pinder and you won't find that 1st picture anywhere"

except it's not tebow's girlllll

Keith S said...

For EP

El Padrino said...

tebow's gril, who not sure if he realyl hit that or not, considereing he is a virgin altar boy and all

El Padrino said...

national treasure right there

thoze abs sliegh me said...

"For EP"

and EP, only

tem said...

keith is a needy bastard

Keith S said...

For tem

blue said...

yeah, i was about to say, "this" chick was never his girl, just some ho that got her picture with him and then got famous.

thoze abs sliegh me said...

is tebow a god fearing good boy?

i did not know this, what a waste of a star college quarterback.

Keith S said...

"tebow's gril, who not sure if he realyl hit that or not, considereing he is a virgin altar boy and all"

You don't think that's the same chick that was in the pic I linked?

blue said...

"You don't think that's the same chick that was in the pic I linked?"


no

tem said...

"Fucking tennis bets are killing me"

i'm doing OK on tennis.

although yesterday I got a "no action" for one of my bets. wft happened there?

blue said...

carrie underwood has long legs, and she's not dating tebow either

Keith S said...

"i'm doing OK on tennis."

So you must not be picking the huge favorites

thoze abs sliegh me said...

when does Idol start back? it's soon i think, maybe next week.

blue said...

yeah, the 13th...in case you missed all the ads for it during the game last night

Keith S said...

"when does Idol start back? it's soon i think, maybe next week."

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

blue said...

i don't get the joke?

tem said...

"is tebow a god fearing good boy?"

not sure how you did not know this.

Keith S said...

Some local news station is at the airport because the Cardinals are getting ready to fly east and there are a bunch of "fans" there. They interviewed one guy and axed him what the Cards need to do to win and his response was "We really need to stop their running game. In particular, we need to stop Steve Smith by putting 2 guys on him"

Keith S said...

I don't get your face?

spaceman spiff said...

"that is lucy pinder you fool not tebow's girlfriend

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

idiot"

beat me to it

thoze abs sliegh me said...

"i don't get the joke?"

me neither.

I think he thinks AI is beneath him.

thoze abs sliegh me said...

"not sure how you did not know this."

don't follow college fball...at all.

Raging Tebowner said...

*running up and down sideline waving arms*

ALRIGHT! LET'S GO! LET'S GO! GET UP! YEAH BOY LET'S GO! GATORS BABY! GATORS BABY *arms doing gator chomp*

LET'S GO, GET HYPED...I SAID LET'S GET HYPED UP....GET HYPED UP...LET'S GO!

*making praise jeebus sign*

blue said...

mike and mike this morning:

"Tebow has a better chance of being President, then he does of being a good NFL QB"

awsome*

blue said...

damn then/than

Raging Tebowner said...

his girlfriend is Jesus Christ.

hi-fucking-larity

tem said...

"We really need to stop their running game. In particular, we need to stop Steve Smith by putting 2 guys on him"

steve smith kills on reverses you.

tem said...

is raging teboner zeke?

Raging Tebowner said...

For EP

kim k is getting that "40 year old woman bump" in the front.

the one where it just looks weird and you wonder what it is.

Raging Tebowner said...

is raging teboner zeke?

no

blue said...

i can't belieb that zeke is forfeiting some of his good TCS points


although this is funny so maybe he gets joke points

Raging Tebowner said...

there is a place on a NFL roster for Tesus.

NS

Raging Tebowner said...

i can't belieb that zeke is forfeiting some of his good TCS points

how is paying off a bet losing pts?

tem said...

"i can't belieb that zeke is forfeiting some of his good TCS points"

i am waaaay behind on scoring.

El Padrino said...

"You don't think that's the same chick that was in the pic I linked?"

1000% no.

blue said...

oh, who'd you have a bet with?

Raging Tebowner said...

in case you were wondering:

in college football the clock stops after a 1st down - it's like a mini-timeout.

thanks FOX!

El Padrino said...

tebowner is high-larry-us

*copyright to MVN for that one*

Raging Tebowner said...

keef had FLA -4

Keith S said...

"how is paying off a bet losing pts?"

blue is a little slow on the uptake today

El Padrino said...

"kim k is getting that "40 year old woman bump" in the front."

didnt notice

blue said...

"there is a place on a NFL roster for Tesus."

yep, holding a clipboard

El Padrino said...

"For EP"

and EP, only"

now we know you aint black, if you were you'd be all up on that

Raging Tebowner said...

EP, good link to that Mike Lewis article, I'll peep game later.

blue said...

Golic called Tebow: the christian laettner of college football.

El Padrino said...

"thanks FOX!"

again, horrendous

the 3rd and goal that was made into a 4th and goal was inexcusable

blue said...

got a chuckle out of me

Raging Tebowner said...

antics aside, Tesus is a straight up BAMF. BAMF.

kid can be a difference maker in the NFL, probably not at QB though.

Keith S said...

"in college football the clock stops after a 1st down - it's like a mini-timeout."


And also, as a receiver, you want to be a hands catcher

El Padrino said...

tebow will not QB in the NFL

will not

he might make a good fullback though

NS

Raging Tebowner said...

and not difference maker as in "ey yo Pacman let me introduce you to my friend Jeebus"

and not baby-maker

but playmaker.

El Padrino said...

maybe a couple of option plays
i could see that

Raging Tebowner said...

on Okla's final drive Thom said something like "you've got to go for it here" before 4th down.

Thanks Thom!

Keith S said...

"kid can be a difference maker in the NFL, probably not at QB though."

Prayer leader

Raging Tebowner said...

I see a more dynamic Frank Wychek role for Tesus.

tem said...

maybe he can coach.

Raging Tebowner said...

Michael Lewis, a contributing editor at Vanity Fair and the author of “Liar’s Poker,” is writing a book about the collapse of Wall Street.

suite, that book will be hdh.

Keith S said...

Seeing the jump pass made my night.

tem said...

i see tebow getting introduced to hookers and cocaine

blue said...

he doesn't have enough dedication to football to be succesful.

I mean the guy goes and visits lepers and does circumscisions...most head coaches will frown on that, when he should be in the weight room and participating in OTAs

thoze abs sliegh me said...

"i see tebow getting introduced to hookers and cocaine"


100% agree. He’ll get that money, all that travel, women throwing themselves at him, teammates egging him on.

jesus doesn't have a chance, he's going down.

Raging Tebowner said...

i see tebow getting introduced to hookers and cocaine

in 15 years when he's cleaning up bed pans in a Gabon hospital he'll kick himself for not nailing as many of those hot FLA co-eds as he could when he had the chance.

blue said...

and i'm sorry, but i'm not buying the "he's won 2 championships in 3 years"

yes, he was on the team that won 2 years ago, but "he" didn't win it. It wasn't "his" team. and "he" didn't have a huge role on the team.

El Padrino said...

"jesus doesn't have a chance, he's going down."

isnt he getting that attention now?

Jesus always wins.

El Padrino said...

Chris Leak won that title, agreed Blue.

thoze abs sliegh me said...

"isnt he getting that attention now?"

minus the money.

tem said...

HUNGRY!

Raging Tebowner said...

coming to theaters near you:

The Passion of the Christ 2 : The Passion of Tesus.

Raging Tebowner said...

LET'S GO....LET'S GET HYPED UP....YESSSSSSS! OOOOO YEAHHHHHH! WE CAN'T BE STOPPED!

I SAID LET'S GOOOOO!!!!!

Raging Tebowner said...

Joke Noah just called and even he thinks Tesus's antics are over the top.

Raging Tebowner said...

President-elect Barack Obama on Friday announced Leon Panetta as his pick for CIA director and retired Adm. Dennis Blair for director of national intelligence.

Panetta, 70, has had a long political career, beginning in 1966 when he was a legislative assistant to U.S. Sen. Thomas H. Kuchel, R-California. He also was the chief of staff in the Clinton White House.

El Padrino said...

jessica gomes makes me harder than an oak tree

Raging Tebowner said...

goddman TP, 2 titles for both hoops and football.

El Padrino said...

"He also was the chief of staff in the Clinton White House."

zeke please, stop with the facts

they cant handle it

spaceman spiff said...

EP theres topless pics of her out there, posted them a while back

Raging Tebowner said...

Hillary and Bill are calling the shots.

ns

they cut a deal at the DNC for Hillary's delegates.

El Padrino said...

"EP theres topless pics of her out there, posted them a while back"

i was blocked and never remembered lovad

El Padrino said...

i adore her

Raging Tebowner said...

They Are The Chompions

stop it ESPN

Raging Tebowner said...

I think USC runs FLA off the field if they play this season.

spaceman spiff said...

'stop it ESPN'

thats not tebowner talk

Raging Tebowner said...

I was rooting for the crystal footyball to get knocked off its holder before they presented it. it was wobbly.

El Padrino said...

The Illinois House has voted to impeach Gov. Rod Blagojevich.

sayanora dirtball

El Padrino said...

"I think USC runs FLA off the field if they play this season."

nodding head

Keith S said...

"He’ll get that money, all that travel, "


How is that different than now?

Keith S said...

"I think USC runs FLA off the field if they play this season."



USC is redonk

Keith S said...

FU is probably chomping at the bit to get back on the field and defend their chompionship

spaceman spiff said...

"How is that different than now?"

pro-life parents logic

blue said...

I think Utar beats Florida if they played today.


partly because florida guys played last night, so they're tired.

Keith S said...

Jesus >>>>>>>>>> conditioning

Keith S said...

8 day til vegas

El Padrino said...

Arod's Fla house

Meiz said...

I had a bagel

blue said...

the bagels in mequon are trash

Meiz said...

they're >>>>>>>>>>>>>> NY jew bagels

El Padrino said...

al davis conducting phone interveiws from the hospital is just too much

al, please relinquish duties

your done.

El Padrino said...

Sure they are meiz.

El Padrino said...

"Nobody has ever beaten the Giants twice at the Giants’ home in the same season. Nobody.

Ever."



just let that marinate a bit.

Keith S said...

First time for everything

spaceman spiff said...

"just let that marinate a bit."

everything comes to an end

blue said...

how many times has the gints had to play somebody twice at home in a season?

El Padrino said...

et tu spiff?

El Padrino said...

"how many times has the gints had to play somebody twice at home in a season?"

9, 9-0

spaceman spiff said...

once, theyre 1 for 1

s

spaceman spiff said...

"et tu spiff?"

youre hyping the gints

El Padrino said...

final destination car crash sequence is lovely

El Padrino said...

"youre hyping the gints"

i'm doin my best to keep it down

El Padrino said...

little sad i wont be seeing charger cheerleading boobs this weekend

those were great

El Padrino said...

if sd beats pitt and ravens beat ten


we will see charger cheerleading boobs again

tem said...

"chompionship"

ISWYDT

tem said...

"little sad i wont be seeing charger cheerleading boobs this weekend"

maybe they will be professional and show off the boobs in the cold.

tem said...

chinese ass is no laughing matter for the chinese:

Chinese actress Zhang Ziyi has been chastised by her fellow countrymen after topless photos of the star cavorting on a beach with her Israeli fiance surfaced online.

The Memoirs of a Geisha beauty, 29, was recently snapped sunbathing on a Caribbean beach wearing just a pair of bikini bottoms as her billionaire lover Vivi Nevo touched her intimately.

The holiday images have sparked outrage in conservative China, with some detractors branding her "shameless".

One critic writes on an internet forum, "Zhang Ziyi is really shameless. She is with a foreigner, but should remember certain conduct is expected of Chinese women."

The pictures have since been censored by China's internet authorities and have been removed from many websites.

Meiz said...

gotta love communist China

El Padrino said...

still cant believe we had the olympics there

blue said...

cheerleaders don't travel do they?

maybe for the playoffs they do

Meiz said...

I hope the IOC allows us to cheat at the next olympics held in the US like they did for China

tem said...

"cheerleaders don't travel do they?
"

yes they do.

Raging Tebowner said...

I hope the IOC allows us to cheat at the next olympics held in the US like they did for China

it's all fixed deke

Raging Tebowner said...

Carolina -10

BET THE HOUSE

Raging Tebowner said...

*starts running around*

LET'S GO!!!! I SAID LET'S GO! GET UP! THEY CAN'T BEAT US! LET'S GET HYPED UP!!! YEAH BOY!!!!!

LET'S GO! LET'S GO! LET'S GO!

YOU'RE NEXTTTTTT!

Raging Tebowner said...

Arod's Fla house

I think Fiddy Cent cut the price on his NY home by like 4 mil (it's tyson's ex house)

Raging Tebowner said...

didn't Mandonna* dump his ass already?

thoze abs sliegh me said...

See, Obama knows

blue said...

"yes they do."

let me rephrase: cheerleaders don't go to away games as part of the team do they? or is that something they do for the playoffs?

Raging Tebowner said...

About 70 miles farther north -- in Manalapan, about 10 miles south of Palm Beach -- boxing's Don King listed his oceanfront estate Thursday for $27.5 million.

"I need to downsize," said Mr. King, who is now 77 and said walking from house to house has become inconvenient. "I'm going to move to wherever I can find a nice little cozy, $10-to-$5-million house."


only in America!

Raging Tebowner said...

See, Obama knows

sure he says something now, but if people criticize him he'll piss his pants and clam up.

Raging Tebowner said...

The beach, roughly 15 feet down, is accessed via a retractable staircase.

I need to get me one of those.

Raging Tebowner said...

*starts running around*

LET'S GO!!!! I SAID LET'S GO! GET UP! THEY CAN'T BEAT US! LET'S GET HYPED UP!!! YEAH BOY!!!!!

LET'S GO! LET'S GO! LET'S GO!

YOU'RE NEXTTTTTT!

re-read that - I SAID LET'S GO!!!! LET'S GET HYPED UP!!!!

tem said...

for the playoffs they travel, for most teams.

for the regular season i think some teams bring them too.

thoze abs sliegh me said...

Looks like Microsoft is ditching Vista, took them long enough

blue said...

"sure he says something now, but if people criticize him he'll piss his pants and clam up."

nah, he's just not going into specifics as to how he'd set it up.

tem said...

that's why TMQ will talk about Team As cheerleaders wearing nothing but Team Bs cheerleaders wore sweatsuits so the football Gods rewarded team A with a victory over team B for cheerleader professionalism.

blue said...

good point tem

Raging Tebowner said...

Steve you're a tech guy, you heard anything about Palm's new telephone?

heard it is just as good if not better than the iphone.

please advice

Raging Tebowner said...

good point tem

it takes that TMQ guy 80,000 words to say what tem said in less than a hundo.

TemMQ

Raging Tebowner said...

Ballmer later yielded the stage to Robbie Bach, president of Microsoft's entertainment and devices division, who praised the explosive growth of the company's Xbox Live online gaming community. Bach also announced forthcoming releases of new versions of Microsoft's popular "Halo" game series: "Halo Wars," due Feb. 28, and "Halo 3: ODST," which will ship in the fall.

Raging Tebowner said...

so I bought a new comp 5 months ago with that vista shit, are they going to hook us with free Windows 7 or whatever?

wft

Raging Tebowner said...

damn, even Tesus can't get this place hyped.

thoze abs sliegh me said...

"Steve you're a tech guy, you heard anything about Palm's new telephone?

heard it is just as good if not better than the iphone.

please advice"

this is the first I've heard of it.

i'm not a very good tech guy.

El Padrino said...

hate when your not even done with lunch but you have to take a monster shit

hate that

thoze abs sliegh me said...

"hate that"

i hate when people give too much information while i'm eating lunch.

Raging Tebowner said...

a monster shit or explosive diarehea*?

tem said...

"TemMQ"

if zeke, keith, spiff or el pad had said this it would be worth TCS points.

El Padrino said...

"a monster shit or explosive diarehea*?"

no, no, just a monster shit
got a turtle head peeking ya know

Raging Tebowner said...

there are some farms near where I work and last night when I went outside I had to mouth breath bc of the smell.

I had like 5 gag reflexes/throw up attempts at first.

never smelt* something that bad before

ns

Raging Tebowner said...

no, no, just a monster shit
got a turtle head peeking ya know

ah, you're prairie doggin'

gotcha

tem said...

hmm el tardo has new ish up.

i'd read it on the can, but the new diet means i never poop.

Raging Tebowner said...

if zeke, keith, spiff or el pad had said this it would be worth TCS points.

can I get the points retroactively after I pay off this debt?

tem said...

if you are zeke you can get the points now, but you said you weren't zeke.

Raging Tebowner said...

tem don't play dat

Keith S said...

At halftime of the championship game, with Florida on the lucky end of a 7-7 tie, Tim Tebow sought an audience with offensive coordinator Dan Mullen.

"Don't be afraid," Tebow said. "Don't be afraid to give one-five the ball."



Hilarity

thoze abs sliegh me said...

"there are some farms near where I work"

what sort of farms are in the desert?

Raging Tebowner said...

what sort of farms are in the desert?

not sure but they stink like bunghole

tem said...

"tem don't play dat"

so you are zeke?

Raging Tebowner said...

"Don't be afraid," Tebow said. "Don't be afraid to give one-five the ball."

I'm disappointed he didn't say it this way:

"Fear not, for those who seek to give me the ball are rewarded with righteousness, while those that do not are banished from the Garden of Eden. Thou shalt give 1-5 the ball. Amen."

blue said...

tem takes things very literal unless there is an S or NS

Raging Tebowner said...

"He is I and I is him, the slim with the titled brim, what's my motherfucking name?"

name the artist

RT = Zeke

oh, it's true

Raging Tebowner said...

tem takes things very literal unless there is an S or NS

ns

tem said...

"tem takes things very literal unless there is an S or NS"

tem is slow today, he couldn't even figure out how to do golf picks.

blue said...

i wished he would have recited that verse that Jules Winnfield made famous

Raging Tebowner said...

i wished he would have recited that verse that Jules Winnfield made famous

hilarity

or if he berated Mullen

"say "what" one more time coach"

Raging Tebowner said...

block

Raging Tebowner said...

block

Raging Tebowner said...

Tesus

Raging Tebowner said...

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"Idiots with nothing better to do"





"Most Boston sports fans are just douchebags. Because most people from New England are douchebags." - tem





"Obama got elected because of the Rooney rule" - Jug





"you should never let debt stop you from pro-creating anyway" - El Padrino





"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H





"i'm dumb and sensitive. basically i'm a woman" - L Padrino





"I'm so horny this morning. If there wasn't this sex offender list going around id grope bitches on the train this morning" - L Padrino