Friday, December 05, 2008

El Pad's Weekly Betting Forum

Some basketball that did not suck was on last night. Big twelve teams playing Pac-10 teams. It's Jimmy V week. Let the tears flow on various wwl pieces where that Chris Connel or whatever his name is stands in a desserted field and puntuates sad words then goes silent with violins in the background. Unrelated OJ simpson gets his jail sentence today. Mike Teel welcome back. I wish someone would sign a MLB contract so I can move on with my life. Still can't believe they Broncos loss to the Raiders. Looks like Sarkisian got the UW job. Charlie Weis is fat. Didn't we all say Terry Porter was a bad hire for that team?

Where I Stand:
Cash: $1583
Picks: 42-31

You guys want me to pick the big games in college right? I will oblige.
Throw a Benji on each......

Ball State -14 over Buffaro
The kid continues to shine.

BC +1.5 over Va Tech
I can't believe this line. Must be a trap. I don't give a shit. Va Tech is terrible this year, BC is gutsy, have good linebackers and smart football players.

Bama +10 over Florida
Man 10 is alot, I know Bama ended up beating no one in the SEC but who's to say that Florida did? The SEC was down as a whole this entire year. The LSU win doesnt look so good on Alabama's resume and the Georgia win lost polish on Florda's resume. Florida is the one with the shitstain loss, not the tide. Percy Harvin possibly missing this game is big, not monumental the way Todd McGay thinks but big nontheless. Listen there is no doubt Florida is playing lights out ok but they haven't played a good team or at least a team that play's as well as Alabama. I love points in big games where the team getting rushes the ball and stops the run. I love it like I love hot suace on beef patties. Yeah, that much.

Mizzou +17 over Oklahoma
Neither team can stop each other so I have to bet with a 17-0 lead here. Bradford's hand is the x-factor. A fumbled snap maybe? I don't know but Macklin/Daniels is just as potent as Bradford/pick a WR. Take the over for $50 while your here. It's Seventy fucking Nine.

Big Boys........

Zona -14 over St. Loo ($250)
This is like Boise on the blue turf vs a LA Tech or Idaho. Just not fair. I'll call this one, "Sodomy in the Secondary".

Jets -4 over San Fran ($150)
You know I never like to take the Jets but for some reason this is shaping up to be a nice rebound game for them. Ugly loss at home, get out of the fishbowl play in 70 degree weather against a bad team coming off a good win. Just makes sense to me. If this game were in the Meadowlands the Jets would be a 8-10 point favorite. Take the discount.

Pittsburgh -3 over Romo's ($150)
Pittsburgh's pass rush is filthy. And that's how you beat Romo.

Parlay for ya, 3 teams $25 to win $75
NYG -7 over Philly (Statement game)
Miami +1 over Toronto Bills (Damn shame)
Denver -9 over Chiefs (Revenge game)

Be calm kiss ya mom.

740 comments:

1 – 200 of 740   Newer›   Newest»
Steve said...

Bask, Bask In His Glory!!!

Steve said...

Muhahahahaha!!!

Jugdish said...

I'm surprised you would include Denver in that parlay. I have decided I can't trust Denver at all this year.

Jugdish said...

Steve, did you send in your donation yet?

Jugdish said...

This weekend I am going here for this.

Steve said...

Yea, i read that this morning. Love him or hate him, that's a descent thing to do.

tem said...

yes ask your buddies to pay off someone else's debt.

tem said...

he should have them pay off my debt. the clintons can earn the money easily to pay off their debt.

Jugdish said...

not for the tax payers and people who already donated to HIS campaign. 7.5 is a drop in the bucket for the Clintons.

Jugdish said...

If she can't afford the debt, she shouldn't have borrowed the money. That is part of the reason we are in this financial crisis.

Suddenly I feel reassured about the people who will be leading us out of this crisis.

s

Jugdish said...

I hate when morning DJs interview a comedian and laugh at everything the guy says like it is the most funny thing they have ever heard.

tem said...

hahahahahaahhahaahhahaha

that is hilarious jug, i hate that too.


jahahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha

Keith S said...

"Love him or hate him, that's a descent thing to do."

Oh man, steve continues to deliver during the holiday of giving

Keith S said...

On this day in 1974...

The Birmingam Americans won the first World Football League championship by beating the Florida Blazers, 22-21

Keith S said...

3 days in a row of jingle bells earrings and necklace might make me something something

tem said...

fuck yeah, go Americans.

Americans rock!

yeah.

tem said...

keith wears earrings?

Jugdish said...

America...Fuck Yeah!

Keith S said...

"keith wears earrings?"

So does your face

Jugdish said...

Oh man, steve continues to deliver during the holiday of giving



I'm not sure what world he lives in.

tem said...

"So does your face"

i took my nose ring out years ago.



ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

Keith S said...

hahahahaha that's funny

Jugdish said...

(No) Ball(s) State

Keith S said...

They shouldn't have to play Boise on the blue turf

El Padrino said...

"I'm surprised you would include Denver in that parlay. I have decided I can't trust Denver at all this year."


fucking denver

El Padrino said...

i applaud ball state, they are undeafeated and deserve a better bowl

fuck that

Keith S said...

Did Lance Armstrong go to Ball State?

tem said...

yeah ball st. is getting fucked.


why the fuck would they ditch their sponsors to go blow a game at boise st.??

tem said...

fuck the people who are fucking Ball St.

tem said...

"Did Lance Armstrong go to Ball State?"

no that's where he goes now.

back then he went to Choate.

Keith S said...

That was a descent* joke

Keith S said...

Good to see TP make an appearance alst night

Keith S said...

*last

Keith S said...

EP
I think FU goes buckwild against Bamer

Keith S said...

ASU is getting 10.5 points against UofA. Interesting.

kodiac said...

I agree with that Ball State article; I wonder how Whitlock is going to try to spin it.

-Chickie shit

kodiac said...

that 30 Rock last night was hilarity; far and away the best of the season I thought

Keith S said...

You are the silent killer. Go back to the annex.

El Padrino said...

"EP
I think FU goes buckwild against Bamer"

i've heard

tem said...

ball state will play anyone anywhere at any time*, they aren't afraid!! don't knock ball state!



*except boise state or a team of that caliber or better at that team's home field.

Keith S said...

That's a nice tie, Michael

Oh yeah? I got it at TJ Maxx, $4.

Keith S said...

fmk was laughing hysterically at that because she does the same shit. If someone complents something she says where she got it and for how much.

Keith S said...

complents is HDH

kodiac said...

yeah, Office was high quality as well (as mentioned last night); good 8-9 PM block last night

kodiac said...

the whole Vietnemese conversation between the hotel guy and Jack almost made me cry I was laughing so hard

Keith S said...

Check out these pants. $9. Check them out. Check out my ass.

kodiac said...

*ignore the detour, it's a trap

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

If I was homeless, I would be a serial killer. Ya know, just to make things interesting.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I missed Packer last night. Bullshirt.

Jugdish said...

Deke...this would be you if you were homeless.

tem said...

that homeless person looks like an ugly chick.

tem said...

are you saying meiz looks like an ugly chick?

Keith S said...

That chick has bigger ballz

Jugdish said...

are you saying meiz looks like an ugly chick?



No, it was more the story than the pic...but the dude's sign was funny.

tem said...

ahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Jugdish said...

BCS

tem said...

ahahahahaahahahahaah that's hilarious.

BCS declares Germany winner of WWII.

Fucking hysterical.

Haven't heard something that funny since I read that dude's sign.

spaceman spiff said...

""Love him or hate him, that's a descent thing to do."

Oh man, steve continues to deliver during the holiday of giving"

did that 'no grammar mistakes' bet ever get made?

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I hate my job

Notre Dame is the worse said...

"Yes, the Humanitarian Bowl is played on the Broncos’ home field in Boise, but that shouldn’t matter."

You are stupid, yahoo writer.

spaceman spiff said...

EPs first paragraph is brought to you in glorious HD...


...H by olive garden, the best i-talian food on the planet

spaceman spiff said...

"I hate my job"

it's too bad you're needed there or you could leave

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I should be a coal miner. Albeit, a really shitty coal miner, but a coal miner nonetheless.

If UM only had a QB said...

EP - did you hear about Guff Guff?

Guff Guff Gone

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"it's too bad you're needed there or you could leave"


I need it more

If UM only had a QB said...

yeah, Office was high quality as well (as mentioned last night); good 8-9 PM block last night

fuck yeah it was.

The Office was hilarity.

I thought 30 Rock might have been the more funnier*.

ns

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

WHO THE FUCK IS GUFF GUFF?

If UM only had a QB said...

it's too bad you're needed there or you could leave

this will never not be hilarity.

If UM only had a QB said...

WHO THE FUCK IS YOUR FACE?


*insert deke's "who the fuck is your mom" comeback here

tem said...

"I should be a coal miner. Albeit, a really shitty coal miner, but a coal miner nonetheless."

why? it is a tough gig to get actually.

you gotta wait for people to die of black lung and take their places.

kodiac said...

I thought 30 Rock might have been the more funnier*.

ns

I thought it was; but both were great

tem said...

"GUFF GUFF?"

probably that Michigan RB.

kodiac said...

who the hell wants to work in a coal mine? that's got to be one of the shittiest jobs in existence

-plus, I thought you hated manual labor

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Lets all give Drew Gooden a round of applause for shooting 6% from the floor this week so far

tem said...

clap - clap
clap - clap
clap - clap
clap - clap

If UM only had a QB said...

Lets all give Drew Gooden a round of applause for shooting 6% from the floor this week so far

wow, that is awful.

If UM only had a QB said...

how many FGA?

Notre Dame is the worse said...

Anti Nobel Prize

The more recent ones are the better.

If UM only had a QB said...

Re: Ball State

I get they deserve to be rewarded for going undefeeted*, and not going to Boise St's place to play......BUT

I think the combined record of Ball St.'s opponents was 50(something) - 80 (something).

it's not like they played a tough schedule.

spaceman spiff said...

"-plus, I thought you hated manual labor"

past comments dont always apply to fututre comments, this is a subdivision in pecosian logic

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"WHO THE FUCK IS YOUR FACE?"

Who the fuck is your mother?

If UM only had a QB said...

clap - clap
clap - clap
clap - clap
clap - clap

tem is in the zone today, I'm really like where his head is at today. ns

If UM only had a QB said...

I'm really like


like jordan shooting 3's vs the blazers in that playoffs

*shoulder shrugs*

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"why? it is a tough gig to get actually.

you gotta wait for people to die of black lung and take their places."


I'm hoping for the black lung.

If UM only had a QB said...

in that playoffs


*shoulder shrugs* again

Jugdish said...

hahahahahahahahaha

black lung

hahahaha *hack hack* hahahaha

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"past comments dont always apply to fututre comments,"


It took a little more than 2 years, but Spiff finally figured it out.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

ns

El Padrino said...

"EP - did you hear about Guff Guff?

Guff Guff Gone"


didnt hear, that sucks

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"how many FGA?"


Yahoo says 1 for 11. That doesn't sound right, but maybe it is.

tem said...

i suspected something was up with Guff.

Keith S said...

"I'm hoping for the black lung."

It'll make you jump higher and run faster

tem said...

hahahaha *hack hack* hahahaha


hahahaha, ISWYDT.

funniest thing since I read that the BCS computers determined Germany the winner of WWII.

Keith S said...

Guff did not attend the awards banquet last night.

tem said...

"It'll make you jump higher and run faster"


hahahahahahahaahahahahahahaha

awesome! funniest thing since i read "hahahaha *hack hack* hahahaha"

Jugdish said...

It'll make you jump higher and run faster

maybe coach will finally put him in.

If UM only had a QB said...

it was good to see the Old Man jump on AD last night.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"It'll make you jump higher and run faster"

Fuck. I need the opposite of that.

If UM only had a QB said...

Guff did not attend the awards banquet last night.

yep

Brandon Graham said he's coming back though.

Notre Dame is the worse said...

Avery ended up getting a 6 game suspension.

NHL sucks.

tem said...

i missed my senior year awards banquet.

i forgot about it and was studying for a math test instead.

tem said...

i hated my coach though, so i was glad to miss it. he was super retarded.

Keith S said...

tem is on pace for LoV member of the day

Keith S said...

"i forgot about it and was studying for a math test instead."

Your a goddman liar

Keith S said...

"Fuck. I need the opposite of that."

get a rev lung

tem said...

"Your a goddman liar"

no it is true.

i was studying for a math test.

it was my senior year and it was the one you have to take to graduate. some sort of test on generating functions, which was my "senior topic."

blue said...

i'm gonna watch the OJ sentencing live...

thank you ESPN

spaceman spiff said...

i hit both my centsports bets last night, suite, parlayed spurs/mavs and took the chargers, up to a quarter

blue said...

i hope he screams out

"I did kill them people, and i hope they burn in hell!!!"

tem said...

haha, a time to kill. good movie.

blue said...

t-minus 13 minutes

Keith S said...

Does the max security prison have a golf course where he can look for the killers?

tem said...

"up to a quarter"

a quarter is some solid betting. good work.

Keith S said...

"haha, a time to kill. good movie."

I'm not even mad. In fact, I'm kind of impressed

tem said...

"Does the max security prison have a golf course where he can look for the killers?"


ahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahah that's the funniest thing i've heard since "It'll make you jump higher and run faster"

kodiac said...

i'm gonna watch the OJ sentencing live...

thank you ESPN

when is that going on today?

blue said...

pac-kee-ow left home because his dad ate his dog?

blue said...

sentencing hearing starts at noon ET

blue said...

to bad centsports didn't have an o/u on OJ's sentence.

Keith S said...

Apparently the prison OJ could end up at is filled with Aryan gang members. Have fun with that, Orenthal.

kodiac said...

great; thanks

kodiac said...

From what I've heard, he will likely be sentenced between 10 and 18 years

-I'm taking the over

El Padrino said...

"i'm gonna watch the OJ sentencing live..."

he'll get pardoned by Obama and then given a cabinet spot, probably the spot where he will work on installing a college playoff system and choke white women

blue said...

the goldman's are there, he still has a shitty mustache

Keith S said...

Rollie Goldman?

blue said...

Min is 6 years, max is 18; could have gotten life if they added on the kidnapping, but i guess Nevada doesn't double down or something

If UM only had a QB said...

"senior topic."

::plank stare::

kodiac said...

Min is 6 years, max is 18;

the judge can do an upward or donward departure though; donward is unlikely

El Padrino said...

and i hear in nevada you have to serve a min of 1/3 of your sentence before you become eligible for parole

El Padrino said...

yeah i dont know what senior topic is either

tem said...

"probably the spot where he will work on installing a college playoff system and choke white women"


ahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahaahahahahahahahaha

that's the funniest thing i've heard since "Does the max security prison have a golf course where he can look for the killers?"

El Padrino said...

school is the worse anyway

blue said...

his lawyers are calling him a "first time offender"

i guess being charged with murder doesn't count

tem said...

"senior topic."

when i went to school to get your degree (in math) you had to pick a senior topic and give a 45 minute presentation on it. and then pass a test on it.

my topic was generating functions.

i could neither pass the test nor give a speech on them now.

blue said...

ball state is a bunch of pussies.


if you think you're good enough for BCS going to Boise shouldn't be any big deal

tem said...

in economics to get your degree you had to pass a big ass test, but there was no presentation.

kodiac said...

ESPN just said the judge could give OJ life today

tem said...

you took the tests in the 1st semester so that if you failed you could retake them in the 2nd.

blue said...

OJ enters the courtroom wearing blue scrubs.

I think he got his honoraree doctorate and became a surgeon after all his awesome knife work on nicole

Keith S said...

"school is the worse anyway"

Word

kodiac said...

if you think you're good enough for BCS going to Boise shouldn't be any big deal

fo sho

tem said...

the judge could shoot OJ right between the eyes, but I don't think he will.

blue said...

this is the same judge that OJ pissed off before the trial.

not a good idear

El Padrino said...

prison blue's

yay!

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

No convictions = 1st timer

blue said...

it's a chick judge

oj is charming her, and will stab her

kodiac said...

I'm looking forward to hear OJ's remarks

kodiac said...

damn, he's not going to make remarks

what a pussy

blue said...

OJ must have gone to Ball State

Keith S said...

I read about this judge being pretty strict with handing out sentences. She should give OJ the chair. THE CHAIR!!

blue said...

isn't roger cossack the guy who said Vick would do no time?

tem said...

OJ is going to Nevada State.

tem said...

"isn't roger cossack the guy who said Vick would do no time?"

yep. he and mort.

blue said...

chris mortensen is reporting that OJ simpson is actually going to just get probation and 1 month's house arrest

sources have confirmed

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Too bad OJ's going to the hoosegow. It was fun while it lasted.

blue said...

they need to hurry this OJ thing up

Keith S said...

mize just likes saying hoosegow because firefox recognizes it

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"mize just likes saying hoosegow because firefox recognizes it"


I just like it because its different than saying clink, joint, et al...

blue said...

this chick is not liking OJ's lawyers

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

and firefox recognizes it

Keith S said...

Expect to see the Jesse & Al show if OJ gets the max

Keith S said...

Any luck on the job hunting front, mize?

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"Any luck on the job hunting front, mize?"


Hell no

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Its hard to find a yob when you're always at work

Keith S said...

Just go home and get hammered this weekend and send out resumes.

blue said...

where is Chris Darden when OJ needs him

Keith S said...

Get a yob at the breery

El Padrino said...

A job at the brewery makes sense

Keith S said...

Darden apparently went back to school and learned skills relevant to be a top-notch maintenance man. In late 2008, he took a job utilizing those skills with a large specialty retailer.

El Padrino said...

UPS is hiring too, try that meiz

Keith S said...

UPS is too much physical work for mize.

ns

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"Just go home and get hammered this weekend and send out resumes."


Ha. Resume. I imagine that potential employers would piss themselves from the laughter of seeing my "resume".

I'd be better off just giving them a blank sheet of paper.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"UPS is hiring too, try that meiz"

Holiday slaves

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

UPS: Come work 12 hour days for $7.50 an hour!

Keith S said...

Just go home and get hammered this weekend and send out blank pieces of paper.


*fixed

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"UPS is too much physical work for mize."

Working in the terminal is too much. I'd love to be a driver, but you gotta work in the fucking terminal for like 5 years, first.

blue said...

this guy is talking about the civil war now

Keith S said...

How difficult can it be delivering boxes? And you get benes

kodiac said...

OJ's attorney is discussing the civil war right now

WFT?

Keith S said...

mize is not at all about the it's a marathon not a sprint strategy

kodiac said...

damn Blue; always one step ahead of me

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"How difficult can it be delivering boxes? And you get benes"

Exactly. Being a driver is cake. And they have an iron-clad union.

kodiac said...

The look on the judge's face right now is hilarity; she's very annoyed with the civil war history lesson

kodiac said...

YAY, OJ is going to speak

-I would too after hearing his attorneys rambling on about nonsense

Keith S said...

"Exactly. Being a driver is cake. And they have an iron-clad union."

It all sounds good except the union part. I am not a union fan

kodiac said...

-ooooh, the suck up approach; sad

blue said...

this 2nd lwyer reminds me of drew rosenhaus


NEXT QUESTION

blue said...

yeah he said "it's been an honor practicing in front of you"

Keith S said...

Has anyone strenuously objected?

kodiac said...

after the sucking up ended, this dude (Drew looking guy) is pretty good

kodiac said...

Has anyone strenuously objected?

I used that at a trial I did in November (ns); got a good laugh out of the opposing attorney (a friend of mine) and the judge.

blue said...

OJ looks kind of annoyed,

he just rolled his eyes

Keith S said...

Why do all the lawyers need to talk? Doesn't the judge already have the sentence prepared?

Notre Dame is the worse said...

Pats signed Junior Seau.

Ha, he's old.

blue said...

yeah, the judge knows what she's going to sentence him

she's just listening to them so that they can charge OJ $500/hour for talking out of their asses

blue said...

summary of 2nd lawyers argument

"yeah, he did it, but it wasn't that bad. He's sorry. He was stupid. He's sorry he got caught. He didn't mean to hurt anyone or steal"

blue said...

OJ will talk now

kodiac said...

defendant's have a constitutional right to be heard after the trial and prior to any sentencing

blue said...

they dismissed some charges that he was convicted of

blue said...

OJ is confused

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