Tuesday, April 01, 2008

April Fools

I thought about either not posting at all today, or posting that I quit as April Fool's jokes. But I am too lazy. Instead I am just going to mosey along as if it were a normal day and not some special holiday.

Actual office conversation that might get tem in trouble:

girl 1: there it is jumping out at me.
girl 2: yeah sorry it has a mind of its own.
girl 1: you weren't kidding when you said that yesterday.
:::tem has a very puzzled look on his face:::
girl 2: my butt jumps out and gets people sometimes, it has a mind of its own.
tem: oh.....yeah, I got a part like that too.
:::girl 1 laughs hysterically:::
:::girl 2 has the "i'm gonna sue you" look on her face:::


NHL Update: The playoffs are near so only 9 more months of hockey. Detriot is still the bestest.

AFL Update: Columbus sucks and Vrabel moved one section over. Now I have a homeless guy sitting next to me. At first I was mad, but he makes me look better by comparison so it is OK.

MLB Update: Pitchers suck right now. Also tem is getting ready to plan his trip to Pittsburgh to sit in the all you can eat section, so that is fun. Also I think one of the chicks downstairs can hook me up with free Indians tickets. I am going to look into that. I think going to a couple ball games this summer is in order.

Unspeakable List Addition: Ashton Shepherd. She is a country singer. She looks just OK, but I would wreck that chick in ways that I haven't even thought of yet.

Movie review of a movie tem can't believe exists:

No not Grease 2.

Romy and Michele: In the Beginning

This is a fucking prequel to that Romy and Michele's Hike School Reunion. Wow. It stars Katherine Heigl, apparently this was when she needed the money. Anyway, like I said it is a prequel so it it Romy and Michele just after hike school. As we all know Romy and Michele are really fucking dumb. So basically the whole movie is them doing dumb things. If you like to see a PG-13 movie with girls dressed as whores then this movie is for you.

Also, at the end they both drive off a cliff, it is touching.

Also, I should note that this was a made for TV movie and never even made it to DVD. Maybe, I don't really know that.

o helmet stickers out of 5.

574 comments:

1 – 200 of 574   Newer›   Newest»
Return of the H said...

first?

Return of the H said...

i see Keith was trying to get someone fired on LovAD last night. Thanks bud.

tem said...

yes, you win.

Return of the H said...

I'm really, really hungry this morning for some reason. (bring on the fat jokes.

tem said...

keith would not try such a thing.

but if he did you could fall back on your music career.

Return of the H said...

i forgot to close the parentheses on the last post, so does that make this part of the same thought?

blue said...

wreckable for sure

Return of the H said...

)

tem said...

you should eat a handful of cheerios in the morning.

Return of the H said...

wow, i comment and everyone shows up. H is a trend setter

Return of the H said...

re: cheerios

not a bad idea

tem said...

i put she looks just OK, I should have put she looks OK. the "just" makes it sound worse than she is.

she is borderline good.

Return of the H said...

p.s. I enjoyed typing www.lordzofvengeance.com much more than the previous url. Kudos...

tem said...

1 handful of cheerios + 1 mouthful of milk = good breakfast.

tem said...

i just hit the bookmark and never type anything.

blue said...

plus it's heart healthy

blue said...

bookmark?

H man commeth said...

name change

blue said...

oh yeah, and fuck the nuggets for deciding not to play in the 2nd half last night

El Padrino said...

"I'm really, really hungry this morning for some reason. (bring on the fat jokes."

Fatty McBald.

H man commeth said...

new name for new url.

H man commeth said...

ch ch changes

blue said...

after all the day games yesterday, today is a disappointment

H man commeth said...

"after all the day games yesterday, today is a disappointment"

yup, back to normal Blue

H man commeth said...

lull already?

blue said...

at least the debacle that was the rockies opening day got washed out and they get to start fresh tonight

El Padrino said...

what do those chinese letters mean?

hunger?

tem said...

they are a curse. H is cursing keith.

H man commeth said...

"what do those chinese letters mean?

hunger?"

I think a helmet sticker should go to anyone who finds out what it means. Shouldn't be too hard though.

blue said...

maybe they mean H

H man commeth said...

"they are a curse. H is cursing keith."

It's possible. Those wacky Chinese and their mystic ways...

blue said...

i'd like to thank my FMLB team for sucking

El Padrino said...

"I think a helmet sticker should go to anyone who finds out what it means. Shouldn't be too hard though."

Music
Love
Respect
Big Mac
McNuggets
Whopper
Serenity
Peace
Bald
Go Sox!
Masshole
Cheese
Carbs
Steak
Burger
Southie
Celtics

blue said...

tem got my payment, but did he take advantage of the awesome deal to jamaica that came with it?

tem said...

i thought that was the payment?

was there a check in there or something?

blue said...

offers that show up randomly on the fax machine are always the best

tem said...

we get those a lot too.

of course now i know your fax number.

blue said...

i don't have a checking account so i had to pay in quarters

blue said...

"of course now i know your fax number"

you could send random faxes, the little old ladies here would get confused

H man commeth said...

amazingly EP, none of those suggestions are right.

El Padrino said...

Dammit.

tem said...

"i don't have a checking account so i had to pay in quarters"

yes postage for that was more than the $20 entry fee.

H man commeth said...

i liked the thought process though

El Padrino said...

does it mean stairway to heaven?
or Losing my religion?

what about The Who?
thriller?
Papa was a rolling stone?
Georgia?
Night Train?
Iron Man?
We Don't Need No Education?

tem said...

H does not know what it means.

either that or it means "he who looks like john popper"

tem said...

it means H Man.

El Padrino said...

does it mean bacon?

tem said...

maybe it means bacon cookies.

blue said...

i think it means singer

blue said...

using my vast knowledge of all things chinese, that is my guess

blue said...

"i think it means singer"

like the sewing machine company

tem said...

blhitler hates chinese.

El Padrino said...

"Fuck the Korean grocers with their pyramids of overpriced fruit and their tulips and roses wrapped in plastic. Ten years in the country, still no speaky English?"

does it mean this?

blue said...

i haven't gotten my email about employee stock purchase that was supposed to happen yesterday at close of the market...and now it's up a bunch today and I want to sell...sonofabitch

H man commeth said...

blue looked at my MySpace me thinks

H man commeth said...

but I will still give Blue a helmet sticker...

blue said...

no, blue just looked at the name of the picture file

iamresurrected said...

gotta go to this conference today.

FA-Q.

H man commeth said...

"no, blue just looked at the name of the picture file"

HAHA touche!!

iamresurrected said...

Ep hating charlie makes me laugh.

iamresurrected said...

aaaaaaaaaaaand..

out.
(sonofbitch).

El Padrino said...

later iam

suck hard at that meeting you swine

tem said...

iam is a big wig now, but he hasn't really changed.

good to see the power not going to his head.

H man commeth said...

gfH's lease is up in August. She is currently looking into purchasing a house. Said house is 5 minutes from where I currently reside. I'm not sure if I'm happy about her being that close...

blue said...

would you rather she buy the house, or just move in with you...

blue said...

because those are your options now

H man commeth said...

"would you rather she buy the house, or just move in with you..."

oh no, I'd rather she buy the house. Way too soon or moving in conversations. Plus she has three dogs and 6 cats. Those will not all fit in Casa del H.

Keith S said...

On this day in 1995...

In a curious decision, the International Olympic Committee granted provisional recognition to ballroom dancing as a demonstration sport for the upcoming Atlanta Games.

El Padrino said...

buying a house?
housing market is shite
i'd wait....

Keith S said...

"Plus she has three dogs and 6 cats."

Is her last name Peta?

blue said...

"housing market is shite"

it's a great time to buy...bad time to sell.

Keith S said...

NYC metro area has the best shitty housing market.

tem said...

yeah now is the time to buy for sure.

tem said...

buy low, sell high.

H man commeth said...

"it's a great time to buy...bad time to sell."

agreed. Houses in my area are wicked cheap compared to recent years.

tem said...

3 dogs and 6 cats?

and she rents now? i hope she is renting a house.

H man commeth said...

yes tem, she rents a house

H man commeth said...

the animals are actually ridiculously well trained and behaved, which is why it's tolerable to have so many.

Keith S said...

aitch
I wasn't trying to get you in trouble. I forgot the indian lawyer was here.

blue said...

the indian lawyer who has admitted to smoking crack and promiscuous sex with same gendered people..

El Padrino said...

sadly you guys think it's the bottom, it's not

housing will get lower
that's why i'd wait

sellers will settle for way less

tem said...

H won't get in trouble.

I gave him permission to look up my stuff.

So did the porn star. Although she may not remember doing so.

tem said...

it is near the bottom.

Keith S said...

I'm going to be buying in December. Hopefully we'll be able to name our price.

tem said...

can't speak for the NYC metro market or the Boston Market (housing not the restaurant), but the Columbus market is showing signs of life.

blue said...

i think you're wrong EP, while it might not have bottomed out completely. the fact that mortgage rates are falling means that there will be people getting back into the housing market, and soon. What you're going to see is a bunch of investors coming in and buying up these houses on the cheap and turning them into rentals.

El Padrino said...

all opinions are valid
you can disagree, like i do with your opinion but i'm certaintly not wrong, neither are you

we'll see

Keith S said...

Someone's wrong

Keith S said...

Probably blue, because he does not live in the NYC metro area

blue said...

there are still a bunch of foreclosures coming in the next few months which will not help stabilize the housing market, that's for sure

El Padrino said...

most likely

H man commeth said...

"So did the porn star. Although she may not remember doing so."

at least i didn't give the house number...and keith already knew she was on that road, he's just pretending that he didn't, right Keith?

Keith S said...

Yeah, I totally knew that.

Keith S said...

She was holding auditions there last week.

Keith S said...

I need to buy a new *wall(et)

JFreak said...

pecify the email address of the AdSense account.
Specify the postal code of the AdSense account, if any.

EP, i need these from you so I can mess with the adsense stuff.

Or you can do it yourself.

blue said...

adsense is nonsense

tem said...

i am sad i missed housing market talk time.

tem said...

i know things about it.

tem said...

unlike most other topics.

tem said...

i just blew through madness

tem said...

twss

tem said...

this is a pre-lunch run.

tem said...

we are used to seeing this kind of thing from tem

tem said...

tem can still bring the heat and comments when need be.

tem said...

whoever said he was washed up was only partially correct.

tem said...

i should note that i forgot to put deodorant on today.

tem said...

i don't think it affects my sunny disposition any.

JFreak said...

tem is dum.

kodiac said...

I got nothing; I'm lurking this morning apparently

tem said...

and i am not a sweaty guy, certainly not sitting behind a computer.

tem said...

"tem is dum."

truer words.....

JFreak said...

good morning kod.

kodiac said...

morning

tem said...

why is kod not at work?

kodiac said...

not feeling good today; sick stomach

Keith S said...

I still don't get how you forget to put on deodorant

blue said...

of course his license plates were expired, he lost all that $$$ last year being suspended for 8 games.

kodiac said...

I still don't get how you forget to put on deodorant

me neither; but I sweat like a fat man. If I didn't sweat much, maybe I'd forget from time to time

tem said...

i don't know how i forget either.

but i do. fairly often too.

blue said...

new something on LOF

El Padrino said...

"pecify the email address of the AdSense account.
Specify the postal code of the AdSense account, if any.

EP, i need these from you so I can mess with the adsense stuff."

whoa, slow down ranger
talk to me
don't you have my email addy?
what do you need me to do?

tem said...

i think it is because my mornings are always very rushed.

out of bed to out the door takes 25 minutes at most.

JFreak said...

it needs to be the same e-mail that signed up for the account.

if i put in my e-mail, it'll be a different account.

Keith S said...

We're not going to have ads for socks on LoV, are we?

blue said...

you can always change the account at a later time

El Padrino said...

we have adsense now
i just have to add it

i'll add it above the snaoff simulator if that's ok

if not let me know

P.S. if you still have my email send me yurz

blue said...

p.s. is hilarity

tem said...

if we have ads for socks at least one person will click it.

tem said...

also.

adsense.

wft?

please advice.

El Padrino said...

adsense = advertisements

blue said...

yeah, hurricane relief

Keith S said...

tem
EP is making money off of us.

JFreak said...

adsense = pay per click ads.

basically, anyone that comes to our site and clicks the ads makes us something like 10 cents in ad revunue.

blue said...

just put it at the bottom of the page EP

blue said...

who is going to click the ads?

El Padrino said...

"just put it at the bottom of the page EP"

then no one will see it

Keith S said...

I know cumfast lurks, so we can put some Purina ads on the page.

blue said...

"then no one will see it"

nobody clicks on the google adsense ads anyway...they're stupid

El Padrino said...

or goatee trimmers

blue said...

unless we are all going to click on the ad everyday, who else will?

Keith S said...

blue is being debbie downer

kodiac said...

if there is a way to link to porn sites I have a feeling quite a few lurkers will click

Keith S said...

Can't each of us click on the ad 100 times per day?

JFreak said...

anyone here can click on the ads, but don't overdo it.

last time i signed up for adsense, that's what got me in trouble. I got a bunch of my friends to click everyday, and that got me shut down.

so only click if you actually are interested in the ad.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"oh no, I'd rather she buy the house. Way too soon or moving in conversations. Plus she has three dogs and 6 cats. Those will not all fit in Casa del H."



H! RUN! DO NOT WALK! RUN!!!!

blue said...

"so only click if you actually are interested in the ad."

yeah, i'm interested in the hurricane relief fund

blue said...

EP, if you tell me your publisher ID, i've got it set up on LOF, and I can direct it to your account

kodiac said...

Plus she has three dogs and 6 cats. Those will not all fit in Casa del H."

sounds like fmkod; she has 2 dogs, 6 cats and a snake

El Padrino said...

right, do not click on the ad 100 times

we'd get shut down on all LOV blogs and my own blog

if you see something you might be interested in click it, and click it once

if and when we get more readers, somehow, they will click it too

then we'll open up the LOV diner and LOV films, and LOV brewery and LOV magazine, etc.

blue said...

i need your email and zipcode used to set up the adsense account, much like what freak did.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Countless customers: I need this to go overnight.

Me: Do you need it to be guaranteed to get there tomorrow?

CC: No



WELL THEN IT DOESN'T NEED TO GO OVERNIGHT, YOU SIMPLE MOTHERFUCKER.

blue said...

i wonder if we can put yahoo ads on there too?

Keith S said...

If they ask for it to go overnight, why do you ask if it needs to be delivered tomorrow?

El Padrino said...

blue, LOF is done already

Keith S said...

I just ate a bag of jellybeans, now I might throw up.

Keith S said...

The ad on LoF is at the bottom.

El Padrino said...

no, no

blue said...

"blue, LOF is done already"

ok, good

blue said...

no, it's up at the top

El Padrino said...

"I just ate a bag of jellybeans, now I might throw up."

Nerds?

Keith S said...

"Nerds?"

No, I never could find any of those here. I was eating some Hawaiian Punch jellybeans.

El Padrino said...

freak you did the search ads funtion?

that might be smart

El Padrino said...

"No, I never could find any of those here"

your city/town is hopeless without nerds jelleybeans

Keith S said...

I know they sell them here because I was talking to someone yesterday who asked if I tried them, but I can't find them anywhere.

blue said...

search ads is stupid

Tyler said...

"sadly you guys think it's the bottom, it's not"

Yes. Wait 6-8 months and it'll get even lower. That's what I'm doing.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I rarely put on deodorant.

JFreak said...

"search ads is stupid"

hello, negative nancy.

Keith S said...

Deodorant talk is CoLoV

Tyler said...

Also, gfH will now be referred to as clgfH. cl = Cat Lady. 6 cats? Dude.

blue said...

ok, freak. You're a consumer...you click on LoV...you see a "search ads" and think, you know what, i need to search for some socks, good thing this site has a search ads feature...

This is all very reasonable to you?

Keith S said...

freak would climb Mt. Everest in search of some socks.

blue said...

I just think it's not realistic that somebody is going to use the search. Would somebody click on an interesting link? possibly, but they're not using LoV to search.

kodiac said...

This is all very reasonable to you?

hilarioua

JFreak said...

would you rather the hurricane relief fund ad be there?

H man commeth said...

"H! RUN! DO NOT WALK! RUN!!!!"

please advise

kodiac said...

or hilarious

JFreak said...

i don't know why it has the search ad feature...

i put the same exact ad box on lof and log and it puts actually ad links up.

dum.

blue said...

"would you rather the hurricane relief fund ad be there?"

that's a great ad

blue said...

i don't know why i care anyway, the money is all going to EP

El Padrino said...

cats are fucking disgusting

blue said...

i don't understand how you can customize what ads are on your site...that would be ideal

JFreak said...

it used to be that google searched the content of your site and then put up relevant ads.

it usually takes a few days.

blue said...

that should be interesting

blue said...

"NY Living Room Furniture
We Offer a Wide Selection of Living Room Furniture. Call or See Us Now!"

NY has the best furniture

Keith S said...

If I ever sell any of my furniture, I'm just going to say it's from NYC.

blue said...

that's a good idear...we're about to sell some furniture on craigslist...if we mention that it's from NYC we'll get top dollar for sure.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Fucking work. Now I hafta ketchup.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I didn't miss much.

H man commeth said...

deke, why are you telling me to run?

Spaceman Spiff said...

cuz your life is dunzo once that chick moves extremely close to you, itll be like she moved in

steve said...

John Cusack has a stalker?

Who the hell would stalk John Cusack?

steve said...

worse.stalker.ever

H man commeth said...

getting close to new

Keith S said...

IU is a mess

El Padrino said...

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Flair is finally done.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"deke, why are you telling me to run?"


All those cats.

El Padrino said...

god bless you Ricky, you were a magnificent son of a bitch

blue said...

flair?

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