Friday, January 25, 2008

Spoof week

First I'll write like Deke.














My hallway.















The Korean grocery.














The train doors this a.m.

Now like TEM.

Unspeakable addition : Rich Rod's wife (s)

NBA Update : Boston has the best record. They must be the best team.

Movie Review I've never seen : Pretty in Pink. This is a softcore porn movie. I suggest everyone go see it. Circles around a young Shannon Tweed who keeps trying on pink lingerie and showing strangers how it looks. It looks pretty good.
4 stars out of 5


Random Side Note : Don't tease me with cake. Either bring it to the meeting or don't. I hate when people say "oh, maybe I'll bring cake". The answer to that is always yes, yes you should.


Now like IAM.
The fact that the NFL thinks that this extra week is worth some sort of revenue annoys the piss out of me. Aren't they complacent with the fact that they make a ton of money and have the image of a clean churchboy who never was sexually assaulted? Aren't they complacent that they don't ever worry about steroids? Aren't they complacent that they take very good care of all the former players? Aren't they complacent that they have Tony Romo? Aren't they complacent that they have Matt Millen in their miserable lives?


Oh in case you missed it my mayor is a lying, cheating, horny piece of shit. Hay-zooz mayne. Did you not think you'd get caught with all those "steamy" text messages. Next time do what the older politicians do and kill the slut. What up Condit!

One more thing. the Pistons are straight up ball-dipping fools.


Now like Freak
You tube.
Hooray.



And now myself.
GGGGGGMMMMMEEEEEENNNNNNN!!!!! take care of bidness is a week away. Iam super pumped and rightfully so. Stop stealing my thunder.


Remember that jealousy breeds acne.


Ok there is a play or two available tonight but they don't excite me. Betting on football is alot better, I've soured on all other sports betting.


Federer lost.


That Xames shit was phat on HD. Normally I wouldn't watch but it was a good 20 minutes. The snow was cool.


That is all.

612 comments:

1 – 200 of 612   Newer›   Newest»
El Padrino said...

damn i wanted tits to be first

Beth said...

EP, the Rangers won but it took a shootout to do it. Typical Thrashers though, they always play better when the odds are totally against them. In fact that's how the article in the local paper summed up last night's game - they listed all the things going against the Thrashers (and there were many) and said it was thus the type of the game the Thrashers usually manage to win.

Beth said...

"damn i wanted tits to be first"

Then don't be so impatient next time!

Beth said...

Very nice post btw, to quote everyone else around here: "hilarity".

Beth said...

And what the hell, the morning Z.

Beth said...

And I hope you realize EP that I passed up a VERY easy premature ejaculation joke when I responded to your "damn i wanted tits to be first" comment. :-)

Steve said...

don't ya feel weird bringing a camera on a train and taking pictures of doors?

El Padrino said...

ranger game was good
thrashers played well

i've watched more hockey than basketball this year

Steve said...

if i was that dude next to the door i would have mocked you.

El Padrino said...

steve not really
no one even notices and it's on the sneak

i dont exactly stand up and get the best shot i could

El Padrino said...

that dude is my cousin

NS

El Padrino said...

and he had no idea i took the pic

El Padrino said...

beth you shoulda made the joke

SET. Spike.

Jugdish said...

I am really hungover

Beth said...

"beth you shoulda made the joke"

Well I figured out of respect for Cmep I wouldn't, as I'm sure it's no joke to her...

Steve said...

Motivational Posters

some of them are kinda lame, the YMCA one is the best.

Jugdish said...

I mean...really hungover.

ToddPacker said...

tem gives out helmet stickers, not stars... otherwise great post

El Padrino said...

your a nice person beth
cmep thanks you

El Padrino said...

oh yeah
helmet stickers

ToddPacker said...

was there a NASA party last night, jug?

Jugdish said...

no...went to a concert with some friends

ToddPacker said...

chilly 40° this AM in tampa

ToddPacker said...

"went to a concert with some friends"

what concert?

Jugdish said...

Texas band...no one you'd know...

Honeybrowne

iamunstoppable said...

funny shit

Steve said...

"chilly 40° this AM in tampa"



winter sucks

iamunstoppable said...

YMCA - funny as hell

iamunstoppable said...

help yourself, help the world

ToddPacker said...

"Honeybrowne"

looks like country music

tem said...

awesome.

ToddPacker said...

"YMCA - funny as hell"

very funny

Jugdish said...

It is...like country rock. Not a traditional country sound.

tem said...

this was a good week for posts.

ToddPacker said...

"The teen wanted to crash the plane into a Hannah Montana concert in Lafayette, Louisiana"


hahahhahahahahhahhaa

Beth said...

"chilly 40° this AM in tampa"

13 wind chill in Atlanta this morning. With this weather I might as well live up north (god forbid!).

Steve said...

"Teen's target was Friday's Hannah Montana concert"


in the words of Chris Rock...


I'm not saying I would have done it, but I understand.

El Padrino said...

hilarity

tem said...

-3 with wind chill today.

good shorts weather.

El Padrino said...

it's cold, it's winter
get over it

Steve said...

I'll get over it in March

iamunstoppable said...

Mary-Kate and Heath

recap: they were kinda, sorta dating.

the bonds that could not be broke: partying, fuck buddies, Marlboro Reds.

tem said...

that hannah montana chick is 15.

18 in 2010.

Beth said...

"it's cold, it's winter
get over it"

Easy for you to say, you don't have to worry about putting someone's eye out. :-)

tem said...

they were fuck buddys.

tem said...

"you don't have to worry about putting someone's eye out. :-)"

sometimes i do.

Beth said...

Tem has manboobs?

tem said...

no.

tem said...

i don't think man boobs are perky enough to poke eyes out anyway.

Jugdish said...

You should not be thinking about man boobs.

tem said...

beth started it.

Jugdish said...

I am going hunting for food.

Jugdish said...

score!

H said...

"you don't have to worry about putting someone's eye out. :-)"

thanks for the mental image Beth...

H said...

besides, I'm sure the pasties you normal wear prevent hard nipples to a degree, no?

tem said...

she doesn't wear pasties.

it's full frontal at her office.

Jugdish said...

No wardrobe malfunctions.

iamunstoppable said...

fuck buddys (enjoyed long talks and had a deep, emotional commitment to one another.)

Jugdish said...

Like Eddie Murphy and his new "bride".

JFreak said...

The temperature here has risen to a nice 5 degrees.

No complaining southerners.

iamunstoppable said...

tem has a nice rack

Jugdish said...

70 degrees here just the other day, although it has dropped some.

Jugdish said...

That's why I wear this ----------->

hat.

Jugdish said...

Merry Christmas...shitter was full!

Jugdish said...

I need a nap!

Jugdish said...

Z

Jugdish said...

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Jugdish said...

Cousin Eddie is on fire!

Beth said...

"it's full frontal at her office'

That's only on casual fridays, so yeah, today.

iamunstoppable said...


F the FAA


"u tell em, honey!"

El Padrino said...

"Easy for you to say, you don't have to worry about putting someone's eye out. :-)"

i was gonna ask you about this but decided against it because you passed on that earlier joke.

see, it's like that insurance commercial, when one person see's you doing something nice the other one follows

Jugdish said...

If that cat had nine lives, he just used em all.

El Padrino said...

pennsylvanians are silly

El Padrino said...

i wanna crush the gollum's windpipe

JFreak said...

The heat in my car stopped working.

Pretty inconvient.

iamunstoppable said...

EP

Do it.

El Padrino said...

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

El Padrino said...

he just fucking repaets himself over and over again

JFreak said...

rich rod being rich rod

Keith S said...

IT'SSS FRIIIDAAYYYYYYYYY!!!

El Padrino said...

bill gates is a nice man

Keith S said...

Sad story

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Crohn's disease is today's #8 top search on Yahoo. Why?

Keith S said...

That's what I've been getting tested for

Keith S said...

I've been having all my friends search it.


s

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

From last post:

""Interesting. You can send .wma's via e-mail."

Where have you been for the past five years?"



I figured they would have put and end to that.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"That's what I've been getting tested for"

I'm well aware of that.

El Padrino said...

jesus keef

Keith S said...

what

JFreak said...

how can you regulate e-mail attachments?

Keith S said...

I wish baseball season was here

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Baron Davis busted a triple-double last night.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"how can you regulate e-mail attachments?"

If I knew, I wouldn't be working at the fucking UPS Store.

Jugdish said...

How do you want to regulate them?

Keith S said...

Seriously?

tem said...

"Crohn's disease "

my bosses daughter had this, then she had some sort of surgery and was all better.

JFreak said...

""how can you regulate e-mail attachments?"

If I knew, I wouldn't be working at the fucking UPS Store."

...

you can't regulate attachments.

as long as you have the file on your computer, and it isn't too big, you can send it to anyone else by any means.

iamunstoppable said...

yay, lets live in a police state!

iamunstoppable said...

they should just have an on-campus SWAT team at every university and be done with it

iamunstoppable said...

mad

iamunstoppable said...

ness

Keith S said...

100

Keith S said...

I hate living in a red state

El Padrino said...

"what"

that story was sad

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I couldn't figure out how to attach an mp3 last night. I just kept attaching iTunes. Couldn't find the individual files.

iamunstoppable said...

that story was insanely sad. that bitch was vindictive like a ma'fugger

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Check out my blog thingy for a pic of Dana Jacobson at the roast.

El Padrino said...

deke you like my hallway?

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Your hallway looks like you could catch the stds in it.

Keith S said...

"that story was sad"

That's why I labeled it "Sad story"

Keith S said...

I wasn't lyin'

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Nevermind, you hallway looks cool to me. I just glossed over it the first time. Pics were taking too long to load.

Keith S said...

"that dude is my cousin"

Hopefully you don't have the same hair genes

El Padrino said...

you guys going to see Rambo tonight?

Keith S said...

negative

El Padrino said...

"Hopefully you don't have the same hair genes"

i dont

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Jug, what's the deal with the "man" on Mars? Is that you?

El Padrino said...

rocky training montage

iamunstoppable said...

David Lee Roth: Primal Screams

El Padrino said...

PIZZZAAAAAAAAAA


FREEEE
PIZZZAAAAAA

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

slow fuckin' day.

blue said...

replay of my hole in one is up on LOG

tem said...

today is wall day.

blue said...

*link to replay

blue said...

shamford makes me laugh...his first few days on TSN his posts were getting like 5k views...now it's around 1.5k

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

People are fucking annoying today.

El Padrino said...

deke you meant everyday

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Shamford sucks

tem said...

log has porn?

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Yep. My fault, EP.

tem said...

1.5 is less than his blog got.

maybe.

i don't know, i just made that up.

blue said...

I think you're right Tem

Keith S said...

"Roger Federer's stunning loss in the semis of the Australian Open is a cautionary tale for Pats fans everywhere"

Huh?

Keith S said...

Tennis ≠ football

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

LOG is porn.

El Padrino said...

favorites going down i think he would be referring to

Keith S said...

On this day in 1987...
Quarterback Phil Simms led the Geeeeeee-men to a 39-20 victory over the Denver Broncos in Super Bowl XXI(21 to the layperson), the Geeeeee-men's first title since 1956. Simms set a Super Bowl record for passing accuracy and was named the game's Most Valuable Player.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

It's funny that shammy still does that parenting blog.

blue said...

beth is my favorite going down chick

Keith S said...

"favorites going down i think he would be referring to"

Yeah I got that, but tennis is 1 person, football is 50something people. Federer has a bad day, he's done. Brady has a bad day, someone else can pick it up.
Stop defending shammy, El Padford

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I enjoy Keith's daily facts.

blue said...

elpadford...hahaha

tem said...

elpadford is hilarity.

tem said...

shamford has to be a shitty dad.

has to be.

tem said...

beth is blue's favorite going down chick, but it is likely she never went down on him.

tem said...

i find that amusing and interesting.

El Padrino said...

no it isnt
it's the ultimate insult

El Padrino said...

and if i woulda known he said it i wouldnt have touched on it

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Maybe she went down on his list of some sort.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

El Shamdrino

Keith S said...

Shammy (douchebag) is going to pick (jinx) the Geeeeee-men (homos) to win (be victorious)

El Padrino said...

his opinion is irrelavant

tem said...

( ) jokes are great.

Keith S said...

Lunch today

Beth said...

"beth is blue's favorite going down chick, but it is likely she never went down on him"

You really felt you had to include the "it is likely" in there tem?

Keith S said...

Nothing is a guarantee

Keith S said...

Except death, taxes and cmcummy being a sasquatch

El Padrino said...

bbq food is good

El Padrino said...

Taylor then explained that he hooks clips to his wife's nipples and "plugs the cord into a electric strip" and shocks her.

full story here

tem said...

you never know what or who you've done beth.

yesterday i learnt that you and kod were getting married.

Keith S said...

"Taylor then explained that he hooks clips to his wife's nipples and "plugs the cord into a electric strip" and shocks her."

Is he fmbeth?

Beth said...

"Nothing is a guarantee"
"Except death, taxes and cmcummy being a sasquatch"

Nah, there are plenty of more things that are guaranteed. To name just a quick couple - that EP will bet on the Super Bowl, that Deke will get pissed off at someone each day, that rev will eat each day, etc.

El Padrino said...

i would agree with the fox

Beth said...

"yesterday i learnt that you and kod were getting married"

Well can you blame me? Kod will make such a beautiful bride...

Keith S said...

kod will have a new spousal abuse cause to take up

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"that Deke will get pissed off at someone each day"


yes

tem said...

beth is so pessimistic.

tem said...

debbie downer.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

now I want a pulled pork sandwich

El Padrino said...

TWSS

Beth said...

"beth is so pessimistic"
"debbie downer"

Is newtem back?

And that's not pessimism, that's reality.

iamunstoppable said...

beth, whats your sign?

Keith S said...

Men at Work

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

wall

Keith S said...

s

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Slippery When Wet

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Caution: May Become Icy

Keith S said...

Parking in Rear

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Caution: Children At Play

Beth said...

"beth, whats your sign?'

You're into astrology now iam? Or just very bad pickup lines? :-)

But I'm a Virgo (time for the "beth is no virgin" jokes...)

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Loading Zone

El Padrino said...

Slippery when wet is a classic

Beth said...

I see iam's question opened up amateur hour. If so, I want to play. :-)

Caution, curves ahead.

Keith S said...

Railroad Crossing

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Blasting Zone Ahead

Keith S said...

Do Not Enter


(s)

ToddPacker said...

don't block the box

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Center Lane Closed Ahead

ToddPacker said...

no dumping

ToddPacker said...

no double parking

ToddPacker said...

handicapped parking

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Weight Limit: 10T

Keith S said...

Animal Crossing

El Padrino said...

Deer Crossing

?

Keith S said...

Go

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Handicapped Access

Keith S said...

This one

Keith S said...

Baby on Board

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

trafficsign.us



Comedic gold

Keith S said...

200

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"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H





"i'm dumb and sensitive. basically i'm a woman" - L Padrino





"I'm so horny this morning. If there wasn't this sex offender list going around id grope bitches on the train this morning" - L Padrino