Tuesday, January 08, 2008

F-THAT!

Keith, after suffering through OSU's 3rd straight national title defeat spent some time writing up a guest post. Feel free to mock him.



Fuck Todd Boeckman!
Fuck OSU’s play calling! You run for 100 yds in the 1st quarter and all of a sudden you put the game in Boeckman’s hand? WFT Sweater Vest??
Fuck that guy for roughing the kicker when you had both arms and legs wrapped around the kick, yet couldn’t touch it!
Fuck Thom Brennaman! He’s an awful football announcer. How many times in the first half did you need to tell us that Steltz was still in the locker room? Stick to baseball you raging homo!
Fuck Ryan Pretorius! Try getting some air under your kicks so it doesn’t get blocked by someone whose hand is head high.
Fuck the SEC! We get it, you’re fast. Christ, there’s lots of black people in the south. They’re faster than white people. It’s physics or something.
Fuck Les Miles! Did you know he went to Michigan? I heard that tonight.
Fuck LSU’s fans! We get it, you can spell Tigers. Congrats, you’re all really smrt. You’re all probably related, too, you inbred motherfuckers!
Fuck being the #1 team playing for the BCS title! Apparently it’s a curse.
Fuck those who says that OSU didn’t belong! It’s pretty easy to say that after they get their ass kicked.
Fuck New Orleans! Katrina should have wiped you off the map.
Fuck Jumper! Sweet, people can teleport anywhere they want. I’m sure nobody will go watch that. Thanks for spending $1 billion on advertising.
Seriously, Fuck Todd Boeckman! I hate that guy.
Fuck my gf! She single-handedly ruined this year’s game. There will be retribution.
Fuck Michigan! Just because. Good luck with Rich Rod.
Fuck WVU! They made it so I couldn’t give my Fiesta Bowl tickets away. Thanks, you inbred motherfuckers!
Fuck cumfast! Again, just because. Expect to see him today. Yeah, my team lost, but at least my girl doesn’t need to shave her face!
Fuck everyone who says to me today, “What happened to OSU?” You will get nothing from me except a GFY look!
Fuck Chris Myers! You used to be relevant. Now you’re a sideline reporter. You’re no different than Lisa Salters, except you have smaller shoulders.
Fuck Jamarcus Russell! I didn’t understand one thing you said at halftime.
Fuck Glenn Dorsey! I didn’t understand one thing you said after the game.
Fuck FOX! You are horrible covering NCAA football. Can you show a replay every now and then? Throw me a fucking bone.
TWSS
Fuck American Idol! I don’t need a reason.
Fuck MSNBC! Actual front page headlines this evening. “'Satanists' burned churches, police say”. Really, who’da thunk it? And, “Unpopular girls gain more weight, study says”. Wow, you think maybe that’s why they’re unpopular? That just cost $5 million, thanks.
Last, but not least……
Fuck Todd Boeckman! I hope Terrelle Pryor commits to OSU and comes in next year and wipes the floor with your slow, weak armed, white ass. You’re 23 years old, and you’re a junior. I'm sure it's fun being 23 and fucking every hot freshman ho, but you're fucking up my team. Go! Git! Scram!


Have a nice day.

503 comments:

1 – 200 of 503   Newer›   Newest»
JFreak said...

Quality effort Keith, 'twas a good read.

ns.

whocares said...

SEC!!

SEC!!

SEC!!

SEC!!

SEC!!

Keith S said...

Wow, I'm impressed with myself.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Damn. I need to do better next week.

Keith S said...

SMD!!

SMD!!

SMD!!

SMD!!

SMD!!

whocares said...

"Fuck those who says that OSU didn’t belong! It’s pretty easy to say that after they get their ass kicked."



Just to point out, people were saying that long before the game started.

JFreak said...

Why in the world would I want peppers in my cheese?

Screw you pepperjack.

Keith S said...

"Just to point out, people were saying that long before the game started."

I know. It was the heat of the moment.

Beth said...

Quality post Keith, lots of hate.

And just in case y'all hadn't heard yet, UGA ended up #2 in the AP poll and received three 1st place votes. :-) (USC only received one.)

ToddPacker said...

nice post, keith

ToddPacker said...

good to see the CEO back in the LoV mix

ToddPacker said...

Gibbs to resign

blue said...

Keith was solid.

maybe you should say "fuck the BCS" because OSU can only beat Notre Dame in the BCS bowls

blue said...

i turned the game off after LSU went up 31-10...it was over

blue said...

nice to see WC up in the house

blue said...

he's giving rev a run for his money in the TIT now

ToddPacker said...

tcs is still going on, right... what are the stats?

ToddPacker said...

fox broadcast last night was terrible

ToddPacker said...

what's the over/under on the number of times DLP was said

blue said...

TCS standings through yesterday's post:

deke 47 freak 25
EP 106 Iam 27

Jugdish said...

I just watched the first half.

I really need to choose a college team to root for.

ToddPacker said...

i don't think tom brennaman was watching the game

blue said...

i'm still not sure why anyone would buy a DLP, you have to replace the bulb on average every 3 years, and that's like $300 every time.

ToddPacker said...

jug doesn't have an NCAA team??

Jugdish said...

Nope...I went to a small school whilst I was in the military...

blue said...

YES! TP finally didn't win a pick'em

Jugdish said...

moved around when I was a kid...no affiliations

ToddPacker said...

maybe NASA should get an NCAA football team

blue said...

that means you can root for anybody at any time, you're a free agent

blue said...

technically Jug should be forced to root for AFA

ToddPacker said...

"YES! TP finally didn't win a pick'em"


congrats blue

ToddPacker said...

i have 0 points in the golf league

blue said...

it's going in my trophy case

blue said...

none of your guys must have been in the tournament, or you didn't pick anybody

ToddPacker said...

none of my guys played.... i made my picks 2 weeks ago before i went on vacation

ToddPacker said...

is there a limit on the number of moves you can make in the golf thing

Jugdish said...

I didn't go to the AFA.

blue said...

"is there a limit on the number of moves you can make in the golf thing"

no, but you can't start a guy for more than 10 tournaments. If you pick him to play even for only one round, it counts against your 10

Jugdish said...

If NASA had a team I would root for them.

Jugdish said...

I thought about taking one of the Texas teams since I'll probably be here for a long time, but it would probably have to be Texas Tech or something...don't want the Longhorns or A&M.

blue said...

"I didn't go to the AFA"

but you were in the force right? and Nasa is an extension of the force basically. The force is strong with you.

ToddPacker said...

how about SMU, jug?

Jugdish said...

SMU

I don't even recall seeing one of their scores ever crossing the sports ticker...that may not be a good choice.

Maybe Hawaii?

Jugdish said...

I thought about Illinois...since I am originally from there.

El Padrino said...

holland tunnel sucks

El Padrino said...

nice post loser

Jugdish said...

I went through the forrest of swirly twirly gum drops...and then through the Lincoln Tunnel!

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I'm hungry

El Padrino said...

root for baylor

Jugdish said...

or U of H...they are local.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

gotta shit.

Shit count-2

blue said...

minus 2? is that where from getting your shit pushed back in?

Jugdish said...

Is that including this one?

Jugdish said...

Do you think Deke's boss secretly wonders what Deke is really doing when he goes to shit and also thinks "No one shits that much!"

blue said...

i'm sure he thinks meiz has a raging cocaine habit

blue said...

meiz should start sniffing a bunch when he's around his boss

El Padrino said...

a little red dye on the nose would be a nice touch

Steve said...

was there a football game on last night?

blue said...

i still don't understand why keith is so upset. I thought OSU played really well in the 1st and 4th quarters.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

He knows I'm shitting in there. We only have one can.

El Padrino said...

deke your nasty man

Jugdish said...

So Deke...Charmin extra soft or extra tough?

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Quilted Northern. Or Charmin Basic.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

cheap stuff

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Okay. Enuff

El Padrino said...

nothing wipes an ass like Scott

blue said...

TWSS

El Padrino said...

snyder will throw a bag of cash at cowher for sure

if not gregg williams will be the new coach spiff

El Padrino said...

and zeke if your lurking

blue said...

I like al saunders

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Gregg Williams is going elsewhere.

Didn't he get jerked around by the 'Skins?

Steve said...

You know what really pisses me off? It when a headline reads "Heidi Montag Topless..." and it end up being crap like this.

That's just rude.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Or was it Saunders?

blue said...

heidi montag is stoopid anyway

iamunstoppable said...

so should OSU get another sympathy try again next year?

3 times the charm?

blue said...

Brian Billick is available

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

38 DAYS UNTIL PITCHERS & CATCHERS

ToddPacker said...

"38 DAYS UNTIL PITCHERS & CATCHERS"


yes

ToddPacker said...

"3 times the charm?"

maybe UGA beats them next year

iamunstoppable said...

maybe Hawaii will

ToddPacker said...

just read through some of the deke/keith tcs battle from friday night... good stuff, epic battle

iamunstoppable said...

clemens with that taped phone call is a nice touch.

keep it classy roger.

blue said...

so if roger didn't tell McNamee that he was taping their phonecall, isn't that technically illegal?

ToddPacker said...

clemens should die

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

NL Central '08---


1. Cards
2. Cubs
3. Brewers
4. Reds
5. Astros
6. Pirates

blue said...

i see what you're trying to do there deke

blue said...

brewers have to be the favorites

ToddPacker said...

the yankees should give their 2000 WS rings to the mets

iamunstoppable said...

i like an underdog. go pirates.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Milwaukee fails to meet expectations in their 3rd season as a sexy pick.

The Cubs get ravaged by injuries, and TLRed Wine leads the Lou to the division crown.

El Padrino said...

the clemens thing is so big here i cant even listen to the radio

iamunstoppable said...

steve would like this post. no use of "eff". full throttle.

ToddPacker said...

it would be cool if clemens kilt himself

Beth said...

"so if roger didn't tell McNamee that he was taping their phonecall, isn't that technically illegal?"

Depends on the state's laws. I know in Georgia only 1 party has to consent to a taping for it to be legal.

See, dating lawyers lets me know these things. And knowing is knowledge.

ToddPacker said...

maybe even take out the whole family like that wrestler in atlanta

Jugdish said...

re: taping

In Texas and NY it is the same way...only one party has to consent. I didn't date a lawyer, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.

El Padrino said...

jug knows

El Padrino said...

tp clemens killing himself would most defintely bump my wedding from my top 5 moments in life

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I'll post our bullpen. look at how awesome it would be in say 2002-2003:

6.Gagne
7. Riske
8. Torres
9. Turnbow
10. Shouse
11. Mota

Keith S said...

"i still don't understand why keith is so upset. I thought OSU played really well in the 1st and 4th quarters."

And it related news, those were the only 2 quarters that the gf wasn't at my apartment.

Jugdish said...

I also watched the press conference and they said that.

El Padrino said...

so she was a mush?

Keith S said...

"jug knows"

It said that in the article about it.

ToddPacker said...

"tp clemens killing himself would most defintely bump my wedding from my top 5 moments in life"


funny, funny, funny

iamunstoppable said...

for beth

Zeke Was My Homosexual Lover said...

gibbs retires, damn, no more timeout management blunders

ToddPacker said...

you OK, keith?

Keith S said...

She knocked on my door when it was 10-0. 90 minutes later it was 31-10. Awful.

Jugdish said...

Clemens wanted to hire me as a legal advisor, but I declined due to TCS.

I think I made the right call.

iamunstoppable said...

i assume he's still eligible

ToddPacker said...

good call, jug

Keith S said...

"you OK, keith?"

Yep. Just going thru the emails this morning. I've got 10 along the lines of "See, they didn't belong".

Keith S said...

"I told you so" people are awesome.

ToddPacker said...

the shots of the OSU people in the stands with the "noooo, not again" look were humorous

blue said...

i bet tem enjoyed the game

ToddPacker said...

right now tem is hungry

Keith S said...

Yeah, hilarious

Keith S said...

At least OSU beat Michigan.

Jugdish said...

right now tem should have the munchies and be hungover.

ToddPacker said...

"At least OSU beat Michigan."

you got me there

Zeke Was My Homosexual Lover said...

at least you have a good RB

blue said...

OSU returns 40 of their top 44 players...except for all the guys who will bolt to the nfl.

iamunstoppable said...

"I told you so" people are awesome."


in all fairness, they did tell you so.

Keith S said...

They'll lose at least 5 juniors. Brennaman said during the game they'll probably lose 1 or 2. He's a retard.

ToddPacker said...

"Brennaman said during the game they'll probably lose 1 or 2. He's a retard"


i don't think brennaman was watching the game

Keith S said...

"in all fairness, they did tell you so."

Everyone said both OSU and LSU didn't belong. So it's easy to say I told you so now.

Keith S said...

"i don't think brennaman was watching the game"

Fox doesn't know how to cover college football. They always have horrible coverage. How long do they have the rights to it?

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I'm looking at ticket packages

blue said...

LSU is good

blue said...

they're probably a top 5 team

blue said...

Fox has the rights thru 2010, so 2 more years

Keith S said...

Horrible

Keith S said...

At least they didn't have Barry Alvarez in the booth this year.

Keith S said...

Next year OSU can play for the title in the Orange Bowl against Florida, then in 2 years they can play in the Rose against USC.

blue said...

don't worry keith, eventually they'll win one

blue said...

it's like charlie brown with the football, you just know at some point Lucy will let him kick it.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"At least they didn't have Barry Alvarez in the booth this year."


You watch your mouth

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I really want to get a ticket plan

iamunstoppable said...

when will OSU play someone they can compete with?

Keith S said...

They already won one, blue.

Keith S said...

"when will OSU play someone they can compete with?"

When will Michigan be able to compete with OSU?

Keith S said...

"You watch your mouth"

I like Alvarez, but he's not good on TV.

iamunstoppable said...

never. tOSU is too dominant.

iamunstoppable said...

UM is concerned with bigger matters. like App State.

Keith S said...

blue
You want your prize for winning the bowl pick em?

El Padrino said...

tressel owns michigan

so what

i own my couch
you dont see me running my mouth

El Padrino said...

college football is over
let's move on

it was a crazy year capped off by another shitty championship game

what else is new

Keith S said...

Dallas owns the Giants

iamunstoppable said...

the Grizzlies own the Knicks

Keith S said...

The Phillies own the Mets

El Padrino said...

no they don't

and don't take your shitty OSU team out on me

El Padrino said...

whoa whoa
whoa

blue said...

"They already won one, blue"

yes, tressel sold his soul to the devil (maurice clarett) for that one

El Padrino said...

sigh

could we not bring up the knicks anymore?

Keith S said...

People like watching train wrecks

iamunstoppable said...

i thought they dissolved them already..

El Padrino said...

remember retraction

El Padrino said...

what's a shame is it's the Garden
at least the Rangers are good again


oh and Trinidad/Jones is there soon i think

Keith S said...

"oh and Trinidad/Jones is there soon i think"

Nice. Is it 2001?

iamunstoppable said...

Dr Phil/Britney... is this shit for real? i cant believe it's serious anymore..

Keith S said...

(s)

iamunstoppable said...

this chick cant be this fucked up, right?

iamunstoppable said...

i guess she got with KFed though

iamunstoppable said...

when is she gonna get with Joe Simpson. u woulda thought he'd have been on that shit already..

blue said...

dr. phil is a moron

blue said...

i hope that this paparazzi guy that's been banging brit, will release a video or some nudies soon

iamunstoppable said...

i'm waiting for her to get her leg amputated.. just cause.

after that, i expect the sex tape.

blue said...

i'd still watch a sex tape of hers...i don't care how crazy she is now

iamunstoppable said...

although she'll probably be banging guys in garbage cans in Times Square, so the taping will be done by a street vendor..

iamunstoppable said...

it'll be a download, not a buy.

iamunstoppable said...

she better have a blue mohawk by then or i'll be disappointed

El Padrino said...

i fucking hate madonna

iamunstoppable said...

britney whore premie zizzle

iamunstoppable said...

fucking wop

iamunstoppable said...

*with no due respect

;-)

beth style

iamunstoppable said...

bring me to higher ground

woaaaah

iamunstoppable said...

people that try to set u up should ask questions first.

like, are u already with someone..

Keith S said...

UGA is playing out here next year. If Beth wants to come out for the game, she could probably stay w/ zeke and "fmzeke"

iamunstoppable said...

otherwise, it makes for an awkward few moments

blue said...

UGA already is booked for the fiesta bowl?

El Padrino said...

none taken

iamunstoppable said...

none given

Keith S said...

UGA/ASU

Keith S said...

It could be a poon fest

iamunstoppable said...

keef, u and beth should meet up. i bet you'll like him.

Keith S said...

ahahahahahahahahah

El Padrino said...

yeah keef
you should

Keith S said...

*crickets

El Padrino said...

it's 65 degrees

it's january

which one does not belong?

El Padrino said...

al gore is playing dirty tricks

Keith S said...

That sounds about right

Keith S said...

Al Gore invented nature

blue said...

i would kick al gore in the nuts if i ever met him

El Padrino said...

does he have nuts

Keith S said...

"I really need to choose a college team to root for."

Texas State University Fightin' Armadillos

Zeke Was My Homosexual Lover said...

wells had a nice stiff arm last night, threw that DB down

Keith S said...

I will never figure out why they didn't keep running the ball.

blue said...

his nuts aren't as large as hillary's, but he has them

blue said...

"I will never figure out why they didn't keep running the ball."

Glenn Dorsey

blue said...

200

«Oldest ‹Older   1 – 200 of 503   Newer› Newest»

Top Of The Page Material:

"Idiots with nothing better to do"





"Most Boston sports fans are just douchebags. Because most people from New England are douchebags." - tem





"Obama got elected because of the Rooney rule" - Jug





"you should never let debt stop you from pro-creating anyway" - El Padrino





"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H





"i'm dumb and sensitive. basically i'm a woman" - L Padrino





"I'm so horny this morning. If there wasn't this sex offender list going around id grope bitches on the train this morning" - L Padrino