Tuesday, October 16, 2007

What?

Great slapper in the late afternoon / early evening (for us East Coasters) yesterday in the comments, it is worth checking out. Slappers are awesome. I feel the same way about slappers as Lois Griffin feels about vaginal sex.

Random Side Note: So yesterday or maybe the day before I saw not one, but two albino squirrels! I don't know about anyone else, but I feel the same way about albino squirrels as Homer Simpson feels about donuts....except that I don't want to eat them.

Eltardo has another column up. I might read it. The description says something about X-rated, but I figured the column is just about the Pats or something. One of these days I'll learn to just stop reading his stuff. In the meantime it is safe to assume that I feel the same way about El Tardo as Hank Hill feels about propane and propane accessories, except the exact opposite.

Random homework assignment: So you taste with your taste buds, but what do you smell with? And don't say your nose.

It appears as though the Rox won last night, so they will be sitting at home for awhile waiting for the ALCS to figure itself out. Right now the Indians have all the momentum, but after game 1 the Sox had all the momentum so you never know. If CC and Carmona shit the bed again I expect the Sox to pull it out. If either of them shows up and pitches well I expect the Indians to win the ALCS. It is safe to say that I feel the same way about the Sox as Bender J. Rodriguez feels about humans.

Random homework assignment: Has any baseball team won their last 14 of 15 or whatever to end the regular season and not won the World Series? Is there any comparison to what the Rox are doing right now? They are hotter than the chick Pee Wee fantasied about in Porky's Revenge.

In case you haven't noticed the hockey season has started. Since all the teams make the playoffs it ain't worth watching yet. But if you really care, Ottawa has the most points. Right now I feel the same way about hockey as Darkwing Duck feels about crime.

Final Sports note, the BCS came out. I don't put much stock into it right now. The BCS right now is the equivalent of picking your date for the senior prom based on which chick looks the best in 4th grade. A whole freaking lot can happen between now and then. It's safe to say that I feel the same way about the BCS as Garfield feels about Mondays.

Now for the tem movie review of a movie I have never seen:

Mona Lisa Smile. This movie has Julia Roberts, Julia Stiles and Kirsten Dunst in it. Oddly enough 3 chicks that I wouldn't mind banging. Of course the movie can't possibly be about Kirsten's smile, so it must be about Julia's, which one, hell I don't know, let's go with Roberts'. Now Roberts stars as Mona Lisa and the other two chicks star as competing models. They all want to be the model for a new Mona Lisa picture that some artist dude is going to paint. Dunst obviously loses out real quick and gets super pissed. Roberts' wins the role because her name is Mona Lisa and the Stiles chick gets pissed. So two of the three chicks are pissed and one is happy. I think at this point the director figures 1 out of 3 ain't bad. The End.

Also Maggie Gyllenhall was there.

1 helmet sticker out of 5.

400 comments:

1 – 200 of 400   Newer›   Newest»
Big Brother's Brother said...

snap

Beth said...

Don't you snap your fingers at me BBB.

Beth said...

And nice post tem, I especially liked the comparisons to explain how you feel about all the subjects you covered.

(ns)

tem said...

comparisons are key.

Big Brother's Brother said...

i'll snap and you'll respond. that's how it works, darling.

tem said...

haha the old ped from FG is funny.

tem said...

i thought of other names' for Mills' wife, all of which he has probably heard before, but IDGAF it amused me, like jingling keys amuses Chris Griffin:

general
wind
saw

El Padrino said...

who won

El Padrino said...

tyler you got caught from behind and dragged down at the 2 yard line in fantasy

sorry

El Padrino said...

NO SOUP FOR YOU!

tem said...

i stopped deke at the 1 inch line in fantasy.

El Padrino said...

Are you that Rams linebacker and he's that Titan receiver

tem said...

similar.

tem said...

i might be out of analogies, similies and metaphors today.

El Padrino said...

nonsense, at 11:30 you'll be starvin' like marvin'

tem said...

yeah i'll be hungry like the wolf.

tem said...

you still on diaper duty today?

tem said...

today is gonna be a slow slow day.

El Padrino said...

all week

ToddPacker said...

tps didn't like me taking yesterday off

ToddPacker said...

i need to change my pic

tem said...

TPS is being kept at day this week.

tem said...

*at bay

ToddPacker said...

funny slapper from yesterday

ToddPacker said...

usf will lose at least 2 regular season games

ToddPacker said...

starting this thursday

ToddPacker said...

florida is a 7 point favorite @ kentucky.... this make no sense

tem said...

CFB makes no sense this year.

tem said...

i hope USF loses only 2 games.

tem said...

TPs new pic is all black?

tem said...

who does USF play this thursday?

rutgers? UL?

tem said...

zeke will be happy to know that i just dropped my first "knowing is knowledge" in the office.

it was met with a blank stare and a nod.

ToddPacker said...

yeah, i went back to the all black pic... i'm still mourning the mets collapse and the last 2 gator games

ToddPacker said...

usf plays @ rutgers on thursday

tem said...

that is a lot to mourn. maybe you should join a cult.

tem said...

i will have to watch that game and cheer for rutgers.

then i will go to sleep and not go to work the next day.

Big Brother's Brother said...

blazin

tem said...

this is more like mild.

not blazin.

tem said...

if i go to BW2s and eat blazin can i take the afternoon off because i am in pain?

Big Brother's Brother said...

takin advantage like Marty McFly on his mom

Big Brother's Brother said...

and just like Marty, i failed

Big Brother's Brother said...

hey kidSSSSS u wanna come SSSSit on my lap?

Big Brother's Brother said...

tem thwarted my initial attempt, but i have intense determ...

tem said...

HUNGRY

ToddPacker said...

nice use of the ssssssssss, bbb

Big Brother's Brother said...

ionalzationalism..


ing.

ToddPacker said...

todays tdilovh will be easy next year

ToddPacker said...

mattingly is scared

ToddPacker said...

i watched a lot of little people, big world this past weekend..... those people are messy

ToddPacker said...

was blue at the game last night?

ToddPacker said...

1/2 way to madness

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I'm hanging out at home with ElPad today.

Home is where the booze is. But first, I must make the walk to the bank, and then pay my cable bill.

Mills said...

It's safe to say that I feel the same way about the BCS as Garfield feels about Mondays.
---------
12 heltmet stickers for a How I Met Your Mother quote from last night. This is where I will say positive things like "kudos to you sir" and "good job"

Beth said...

"was blue at the game last night?"

I don't think Blue was, only shamoff.

ToddPacker said...

why was shammy at the game?

Beth said...

Don't know but he was talking about it on his blog beforehand and it pissed Blue off. I think Blue left him a comment threatening him too. :-)

Speaking of blue, where is he today anyway? Did we know he was going AWOL today or is he just hung over from celebrating?

isiah thomas said...

zeke will be happy to know that i just dropped my first "knowing is knowledge" in the office.


excellent work tem. excellent.

(NS)

isiah thomas said...

I strenuously object to the weasel.

Big Brother's Brother said...

he got nabbed for stalking the Sham.

Mills said...

I strenuously object to the weasel.
-------
stenuously sit your bitch-ass back down little man.

Big Brother's Brother said...

ohhhhhhhhhhhh snap!

isiah thomas said...

stenuously sit your bitch-ass back down little man.


AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH


We can do this again if you'd like weasel.

isiah thomas said...

"-----------"

isiah thomas said...

you're like a battered woman, you never learn your lesson.....you always come back for more.

isiah thomas said...

maybe he got the results of the paternity test and they weren't good?

isiah thomas said...

weasel and his ho are going on Maury Povich (if the shows still on)

"weasel....I have the results....and you are.....NOT the father"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

isiah thomas said...

*Then Corby comes from backstage to be with his baby mama (mrs. mills)

isiah thomas said...

ahahahahahahaha

Corby is the father weasel.

CORBY IS THE FATHER!!!!!!!!!111!!!!11111!!!

isiah thomas said...

are you Midget Mac, weasel?

Big Brother's Brother said...

eh

Big Brother's Brother said...

did Ricki Lake ever finally die?

Keith S said...

blue not being here is not a bad thing.

Keith S said...

Ironic how this child molester's name is Chester.

Keith S said...

Talk about meant to be...

Mills said...

We can do this again if you'd like weasel.
------------
can we really? you are so intellectually stimulating.

Mills said...

nice catch keith. name your kid chester, and you deserve what he becomes.

isiah thomas said...

yeah that was some weaksauce slapper material on my part, I should know better than to try to force ze slapper.

I was hoping weasel would at least try to come back with something original.

But the thought of Corby and Weasel on Maury Pauvich fighting for custody makes me laugh, or at least smirk.

isiah thomas said...

can we really? you are so intellectually stimulating

ahhh, there he is.

wait, call me little man again.

Big Brother's Brother said...

keith, u dont wonder about a Shammy update?

Keith S said...

huh?

Big Brother's Brother said...

god, a 3 yr old would be so tight...

tem said...

"12 heltmet stickers for a How I Met Your Mother quote from last night."


sadly i don't watch that show, so it was just a coincidence. (ns)

Big Brother's Brother said...

Blew = ShammyTracker2000

Keith S said...

"Blew = ShammyTracker2000"

Ahh, no that's not why. We bet on the Dbags/Rox series.

Mills said...

you seriously do have short man's complex. you gotta internet blog rep you gotta protect.

here's a step stool so you can get up a little higher and bang your fists a little louder.
_____
l l
____l l
l l
l l

Mills said...

oh that sucks. my step stool got screwed by the re-format of the page. boo.

Tyler said...

Blue isn't here because he's upgrading the ShammyTracker2000 with Doppler Radar technology.

tem said...

i don't think that stool worked out the way you wanted it to.

tem said...

blue is in jail.

or died. he was pretty old.


RIP pac 10 poon.

Mills said...

sadly i don't watch that show, so it was just a coincidence. (ns)
----------
ur kidding? they made a garfield and mondays quote/line last night.

weird.

Tyler said...

He said on Shammy's page that he was going to be at the game. Maybe he's hungover?

Big Brother's Brother said...

america, fuck yeah!!

Keith S said...

That Doppler shit is expensive.

tem said...

not kidding, didn't even know that 'how i met your mother' is on mondays.

Mills said...

________
l l
_______l l
l l
l l

Big Brother's Brother said...

i hope he gets the 3D storm tracker. theyve shown that shit lately and its worth the upgrade.

Mills said...

page reforMATing has won this round/battle. But i will win the war.

Keith S said...

That one is much better

isiah thomas said...

you seriously do have short man's complex. you gotta internet blog rep you gotta protect.

here's a step stool so you can get up a little higher and bang your fists a little louder.

were you typing a memo to yourself with this comment?

Keith S said...

I need some popcorn

isiah thomas said...

weasel, when you wake up tomorrow, the first thing you need to do, before anything else, is say to yourself "don't suck today".

This simple phrase has eluded you for a long time.

Tyler said...

3D Shammy Tracker would be the way to go. I hope all of the income that PTP is generating goes to that upgrade.

Big Brother's Brother said...

i still fail to see the point of the first name phenomenon.

maybe one day..

tem said...

Hardees, causing heart attacks since 1985.

Keith S said...

"i still fail to see the point of the first name phenomenon."

It's easier to tell people apart instead of just calling everyone by their last name.

isiah thomas said...

I read an article about Hardee's latest breakfast creation, wow.

Keith S said...

(sss)

Mills said...

Is it worse than the enormous egg omlet at BK though? that thing is a heart attack in a wrapper.

Big Brother's Brother said...

I hope all of the income that PTP is generating goes to that upgrade.'

after paying out all the royalties (and being sued) hopefully enough is left over.

damn i like the flying zoom-in thing they do..

Mills said...

re: burrito. i could do without the gravy. that saves me like 80 caleroies right?

Big Brother's Brother said...

they didnt have a story on the BK one

tem said...

did shamford make his daily cut n paste?

tem said...

if he did that means blue failed.

Keith S said...

Nice link.

Mills said...

they didnt have a story on the BK one
--------
they did two years ago. i think it rolled in at 47 grams of fat per sandwhich.

Mills said...

sandwich.

Keith S said...

zeke is an eracist.

Big Brother's Brother said...

'did shamford make his daily cut n paste?'

i say we send mrs jefferson to find out. hopefully the elevator will get stuck while its movin on up and she wont return.

Mills said...

simmons with some tuesday action.

isiah thomas said...

"It makes this big country breakfast portable," he said

"We don't try to hide what these are," he said. "When consumers go to other fast-food places they feel like they've got to buy two of their breakfast sandwiches or burritos to fill up. This is really designed to fill you up."


I've always wanted a portable country breakfast. (essss)

Big Brother's Brother said...

welcome to 2007 and the available daily links.

isiah thomas said...

i say we send mrs jefferson


AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH

Big Brother's Brother said...

the next step will be a drive-thru trough.

make it happen.

isiah thomas said...

I think that went right over lil' mans head.

isiah thomas said...

afternoon sports talk guys were saying the Cards should call the Skins about Brunell's availability.

I guess they haven't hit rock bottom yet.

isiah thomas said...

they also mentioned calling Bledsoe.

(ns)

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

And cocktail hour starts off nicely. I'd like to thank you all.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

The Cards can have Aaron Rodgers for cheap, I'm sure.

Keith S said...

Bledsoe >>>>> Rattay or Hasselbeck

tem said...

maybe they can get gradkowski.

tem said...

tim hasselback is available.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Aaron Rodgers, Brandon Jackson, Vernand Morency for Edge and a 5th rounder.

tem said...

and jeff george.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I should run an NFL team

Keith S said...

deke loves dangling that 5th rounder out there.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

The Cards would be the ones dangling the 5th rounder.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

I've also heard that Trent Green is available.

Keith S said...

Yeah, I'm an idiot. It's cool, though.

Keith S said...

Trent is eating applesauce through a straw right now. He's probably still better than Rattay.

Keith S said...

Maybe shammy kicked blues ass last night.

tem said...

Don't forget about The Maj.

tem said...

"Maybe shammy kicked blues ass last night."

That would be hilarious for everyone but blue and cmblue.

isiah thomas said...

does Green really love the game this much or does he have a lot of bills to pay.

one more hit and the guy's head is going to pop off his body. hang'em up trent.

JFreak said...

TMQ posted at Shammy's.

tem said...

That SG article RE: Pats was up yesterday.

Anything for today, his article said he'd post about the ALCS today. He is probably too busy crying.

JFreak said...

The lemmings are responding.

Shocking turn of events.

JFreak said...

I bought Transformers.

tem said...

i think green just loses his memory and forgets that he ever had even 1 concussion.

isiah thomas said...

excellent TMQ work freak

tem said...

transformers was solid.

Keith S said...

Did you know that Transformers are robots in disguise?

isiah thomas said...

I still haven't peeped game on Transformers.

I've got it and 28 weeks later in the que though.

tem said...

i ahve not seen die hard 4.

Keith S said...

Is a que like Mexican Netflix?

isiah thomas said...

Did they make Die Hard 4?

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

queue.

"in line"

isiah thomas said...

or was that the new one?

Keith S said...

Live Free or Die Hard

or something like that

tem said...

the one this year was 4.

tem said...

soab = son of a bitch

not snakes on a boat

tem said...

not enough tits today.

Keith S said...

I thought son of a bitch was just SOB

JFreak said...

"soab = son of a bitch

not snakes on a boat"

Way to ruin it tem.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"soab = son of a bitch

not snakes on a boat"

Welcome to last week, Tem.

tem said...

that was yesterday, not last week.

Tyler said...

My theory is that Blue, in a drunken stupor, bought a non-refundable airline ticket so he could get into the terminal so he could catch Shamhoff as he was boarding his flight back to wherever the hell he lives, and punch him in the neck for jumping on the Rockies bandwagon. But then he fell asleep before he could do it. He may or may not be in the Denver Airport Drunktank.

tem said...

sob = son ofa bitch.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

i2i

tem said...

maybe cmblue spit out a kid.

JFreak said...

Maybe cmblue is having the baby.

tem said...

i2i

isiah thomas said...

It'll always be snakes on a boat to me.

JFreak said...

i2i

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

"that was yesterday, not last week."

Hm. Everyday is the same to me. I suppose I was guessing.

isiah thomas said...

I think T has the correct theory.

JFreak said...

I2I ON THE I2I

HOLY CRAP, THE UNIVERSE IS COLLAPSING.

tem said...

maybe blue knew it was the end and decided to take the day off.

isiah thomas said...

looks like weasel has found a home at shammy's.

awesome.

lemmings and weasels living together like cats n dogs, strange world.

JFreak said...

Mills is now a shamoff lemming.

JFreak said...

I wish I had an original thought.

tem said...

mills started over there didn't he?

JFreak said...

No...he was a DB de-lurker

isiah thomas said...

it's a shame he's gone, we'll always have the good times.

tem said...

well he should easily be the smartest person over there.

tem said...

i'll miss the weaz

tem said...

RIP weazy.

Blue and the Weaz on the same day. I don't think we will recover.

tem said...

see it is already snail pace slow.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Memo to Corey Brewer:

The English Language, learn it.

Dikembe Meiztombo said...

Cumfast, Shammy is the tremendous hack

isiah thomas said...

we lost blew and weasel but gained cumfast?

its Bizzaro Day at LOV.

Mills said...

i'm not going anywhere. don't you fret zeke...

i have always randomly posted over there. normally to point out how retarded big d in. however, there were two other idiots on there today that got me riled enough to post.

Mills said...

johnny depp is doing a sweeny todd movie version directed by tim burton. due out in december.

i didn't know they were doing such a thing.

tem said...

cummy erased?

tem said...

skittles betting time.

O/U on green + Purple is 22.5

isiah thomas said...

deke, shammy is a tremendous journalist.

his witty banter, his unique take on things (best.take.eVaR!!11), the way he interacts with the people who take time to comment on his blog, his steadfast-lifelong support of his favorite teams.

what's not to love?

Mills said...

Memo to Corey Brewer:

The English Language, learn it.
--------------
yikes. even mutombo (and south african native) has mastered more of the language than corey. not a good indicator of our school system.

maybe corey brewer had robert parrish as tutor?

Mills said...

over

isiah thomas said...

I saw the previews for the Johnny Depp movie. It confused me, and a few people actualy booed it.

tem said...

"sweeny todd movie"

wha? please advise.

Mills said...

its the musical version right? they didn't make it non-musical, right?

he is a barber who slices people's throats, and this lady bakes the remains into pies

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