Thursday, September 21, 2006

I'm A Degenrate

El Padrino's Weekly Football Betting Column

College:

Cal -7 over ASU
No 21. vs No 22. Coach Dirk of ASU is a stellar 0-10 in Pac-10 games played in the state of California. I really like Marshawn Lynch. If they can protect the QB (Cal, Longshore) they will knock ASU out of the top 25. ($25)

CLEMSON -16 over N. Carolina
Clemson beat a good team last week. And I had them dead in the water after that BC loss.
I smell a rout. It's either that or cookies. ($25)

MICHIGAN ST. +3 over Notre Dame
Like I've mentioned, ND has lost seven out of nine vs the Spartans and are 2-5 in games after playing the Wolverines. Who might I add totally exposed that putrid defense that Charlie Weis neglects because he's an offensive whiz who thinks outscoring opponents will win him college football games. Not if your opponent can score too fatboy. ($25)

Pros:

STEELERS -2 over Bengals
Steelers remember last year when the Bengals came in to Heinz field and grabbed the AFC North division from them. Also, let's not forget that the Steelers have a hell of a defense. Led by Porter and Polamalu they will be able to put pressue on Palmer and contain Rudi Johnson.
Bengals have several key injuries that will hurt them and Rothlisberger got that bad game out of his system. That's why he HAD to play last week. Granted the Jags D is for real but he was really bad and the Bengals D does not scream world-beaters. ($50)

Eagles -6 over NINERS
After a deflating loss the Eagles look to take it all out on the Niners. It doesn't matter that the game is in SF. It could be in Bill Walsh's backyard for all I care. The Eagles are pissed. That won't happen again. And the Westbrook not practicing crap, don't worry. That's every week. Him and Fred Taylor are the Steve McNair's of running backs. ($100)

Ravens -6.5 over BROWNS
Keep cashing in on them. Until Vegas notices and doles out real lines, keep taking the easy money. No brainer here. Browns are putrid on O, Ravens are exceptional on D. ($100)

Panthers -3 over BUCS
Question is, who is the worse 0-2 team? Simms has no confidence right now and another bad game accompanied by rounding boos won't make him feel any better. But forgetting that Simms is crapping the bed, where did Simeon Rice go? Or Cadillac Williams? Brooks and Ronde? Where have they all gone? I know one thing. Julius Peppers will make Simms's job alot harder than the kid is making it on himself. I can't see Carolina going 0-3. ($50)

Colts/Jags UNDER 44.5
Jags haven't shown much of an offense lately, besides the running game so, I anticipate a score in the hood of 26-13. Did I mention the Jags can play D? ($50)

Just Teasing (+or- 12 points, my site changed it)
Jags +19
Jets +17
Packers +18.5
Bears +9
($100)

GOOD LUCK.

97 comments:

anonymous said...

how'd that Gtech game work out for ya?

Los said...

Nice work - El Padrino. I hope your luck continues!

thejaywhite said...

notre dame line is 4.5 and I agree ND is in tough here...this will be avery tough game!! Im not excited about the prospects of being 2-2.

Buffalo should cover the 6 against the jets as well but the bills are my boys and I cant pick them in suicide so I narrowed it down to baltimore and carolina....and everyone went baltimore and I just feel carolina should be a tampa team that seems to just suck

El Padrino said...

i agree jaywhite, tampa doesn't look very good at all

nd has a tough one, no doubt

thanx los

gtech was a push, i didnt do it anyway, wanted the under but didnt pull the trigger

thejaywhite said...

Im not sure why Mich State seems to under achieve every season..cause they have tons of talent...and I understand the whole...they take guys from the ghetto and you cant win with stupid players..but you would think once in awhile...a team with that type of talent would put together a 10 game winning streak..

they have had great players like flozell adams, charles rogers, TJ duckett, Plexico, Ike reese, and yes the always infamous dmitri underwood..they had a QB when rogers was there that I liked as well..can we please talk about dmitri underwood

thejaywhite said...

Also bobby brown finally spoke out about the break up..hes devastated

anonymous said...

im devastated for bobby brown.

every little step i take, you will be there, every little step i make, we'll be together...

it's tough to see bad things happen to such good people.

El Padrino said...

he's riveting tv

him and flav should have thier own show

thejaywhite said...

I hate bobby, Im a big whitney fan......now the question is...is this a tina / ike or sonny / cher breakup where whitney gives us some monumentous songs like simply the best.and cher with her bazillion hits..or is it too late for her and shes gonna be on and off the crack forever

El Padrino said...

tough call, crack is pretty bad
you saw what chris rock had to go through in new jack city

ebntx said...

so anyone catch the podcast yet? funny stuff. great job los and smoke.

anonymous said...

luckily the podcast is blocked here at work, so i'll have to wait on that.. but im looking forward to hearing it.

thejaywhite said...

podcast who what where

El Padrino said...

can't listen here but when i get home i will

El Padrino said...

rev and los, check yesterday's comments towards the bottom for th site jaywhite

ebntx said...

at 2 am it was really funny or i might have been delirious by that point.

thejaywhite said...

a guy on my residence street wears a confederate blag belt buckle all the time.....lol..i love it....in canada of all places and he lives with a canadian indian and east indian!!!

thejaywhite said...

obviously his roommates are assigned and not by choice...

Spaceman Spiff said...

i know theyre back in the superdome, but can an emotional high alone stop the falcons incredible running game

El Padrino said...

no but i wasnt about to bet against karma

Spaceman Spiff said...

i hate intangibles

El Padrino said...

yea, they get in the way
sometimes they help though

the patriots were a lock for the super bowl against the rams in 2001...

jugdish said...

I hear for the half time show at the Saints game they are going to bring out about 50 Katrina evacuees so they can shit on the field for old times sake.

The Rev said...

They're good picks, no doubt. I like your reasoning with the Eagles pick.

I'm actually taking the week off from betting. I've been on a hot streak, and I'm not really in love with any of the games this week. I don't want this week to ruin what I've banked.

That's just me though. I'm a betting wimp by nature.

The Rev said...

Thank you for the initial feedback on the podcast. It was a lot of fun. There will be another.

The Rev said...

I liekd Ebntx's feedback best. I may use that as a "review".

The Rev said...

Just for the record... the podcast is here.

http://losandsmoke.podomatic.com/

thejaywhite said...

Rev if you want two good bets

jags + 4.5 and bills -6

ToddPacker said...

The Los and Rev show was pretty funny. Interesting back door technique. I've always hated that Schmidt jerk, now I hate him even more. At least Los can say he was cock-blocked or should I say finger-blocked by a HOFer.

Good job

The Rev said...

Yes, not everybody gets cock-blocked by a guy with 3 MVP's, over 500 home runs, and over 10 Gold gloves. But Los did.

Martin VanNostrand said...

Rev I just listened to the podcast. Good times. You and Los are like an early Stockton and Malone. It had good flow. Totally didn't feel like it was pushing a half hour. Very entertaining. Can we get you guys on All Things Considered?

anonymous said...

rev, does that site allow u to download the file, or does it only stream from that site?

Martin VanNostrand said...

Not to be the Rev's voice but you can download it.

anonymous said...

MV, thats exactly what i wanted to know.. how do u feel about emailing me that file.

me love u long time.

anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Spaceman Spiff said...

sports ho killed sg last week and is up 1 game on the season, she now wears the balls in the family and does the dipping, oh how the tables have turned.

JFreak said...

I'm off to chicago for the weekend.

Peace out.

ebntx said...

rev-

feel free to use my "review." especially because i am so highly qualified.

Spaceman Spiff said...

sports ho says "If Bill were famous..." she has completely obliterated him.

The Rev said...

SG didn't even acknowledge that she took the lead over him. But he kept giving some excuses for his lame picks (notice the sidebar that had the records of all the teams against the spread and how many underdogs won the game outright, like that is a way of saying "it's a weird year, that's why my picks are off").

And that article she wrote was beyond lame, and damn near unreadable. The gimmick is not working. Do us all a favor and cut it off.

He didn't just Jump the Shark... he kept going and landed THUD on the beach this time.

ebntx said...

los and smoke-

so how often will the podcasts be?

thejaywhite said...

Rev/Los

I love the put the hand in the back of the pants and slide it around move!!! its classic...another I call the move to get them to bang is..
i go down to eat out...come up to kiss..go down to eat up..come up to kiss..now they trust when icome up im gonna kiss..now i go down to eat up..come up to kiss but slide the hotdog into the bun.....such a great transition that avoids any conversation

ToddPacker said...

Jay

That move is golden...Keep up the good work

The Rev said...

We may do another one next week. But I can see it being one every week or two weeks.

Jay... you killed me with that one. Classic!

ebntx said...

iam is dying on his blog because he cant link to the podcast site...can anyone post the download on a site for him?

ebntx said...

figured it out...for anyone wanting to listen to the los and smoke podcast but cant access it...click on my profile and their is a link to an audio clip...it should give you the option to open or save. let me know.

ebntx said...

sorry los and smoke...hope you dont mind.

El Padrino said...

simmons picks stink again this week and he managed to piss off all his new york readers with the obligatory "i got a cold when i went to ny" comment.

douche

Isiah Thomas said...

and if thejaywhites move doesn't work you can always fall back on roofies.

El Padrino said...

shanoff's comments question after every post enrages me
it's lame

Isiah Thomas said...

shanoff has too many posts, I've given up reading any of them.

Isiah Thomas said...

is the Rev's podcast ok to listen to at work?

The Rev said...

No prob, EBNTX.

The Rev said...

Zeke...

there's no real curses in it, but we do talk about sex pretty explicitly without actually using one of the 7 dirty words.

A term like, "feeling the dirty pillows" is used more than once.

However, others have managed to sneak it in at work. Depends on how active your office is. Me, I'm all alone in my building. I can crank it up to high volume.

El Padrino said...

slow day

Spaceman Spiff said...

"Shawn Marion has a tattoo of his nickname, "The Matrix," on his leg, written in Japanese. However, when translated into English, the tattoo actually reads "demon bird moth balls." "

i love when this happens

ToddPacker said...

El Pad

Are you planning on going to any Mets Post season games?

I was able to get 4 tix to game 5 of NLDS..(Real shitty seats) through the mets.com lottery.

Just wondering what the ticket scene for the playoffs is like up there. I am thinking about heading up for a game. I made the trek in 2000 for a couple of games against the Cards.

Zeke Fucks My Mom said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
El Padrino said...

TP
i registered for NLCS tix, I missed out on the NLDS tix

in 2000 i was there and it was of course electric

Isiah Thomas said...

the man has been trying to keep me down today....

Martin VanNostrand said...

s-s-s-slow.

everyone listening to the podcast still? If I give it 4 more spins it will be time to jet.

Remember those Rock-n-Jock games MTV used to do? When they first started I was always surprised by how much the rappers sucked. Not all were bad, I remember K-Gee the dj from Naughty by Nature having a nice stroke but for the most part rappers equaled no hoops. Led me to think that's why they started rapping. But I hear alot of songs where the mention ballin all the time. Please, if Ice Cube "messed around and got a triple double" it would look like this 12 wings 12 biscuits and 40 ounces. I think Skee Low could take him.

Is Master P the only one who could do both on a semi respectable level? Shaq sold some albums but they were jokes despite Pfife Dog and Fu Schnickens connections. AI and Artest didn't bring the heat in the booth. Back in 95 maybe I bought this album with NBA players doing rap cuts. Jason Kidd was on there, Cedric Ceballos, Malik Rose. It too was pretty much garbage. Any other opinions on this?

Isiah Thomas said...

SG article note, I saw the same piece on Inside the NFL about the SF photographer...

Why was he dressed like Freddy Krueger? Was that on purpose? I tuned in during the midddle of it so I'm not sure if I missed something.

Spaceman Spiff said...

you either gotta jump shot or you slang crack rock, or in the case of rappers, you rap about "doing" those things.

El Padrino said...

Biggie Smalls said it best
"either your slingin' crack-rock or you got a wiked jump shot"

substitute the slingin crack to rapping

El Padrino said...

damn spiff, maybe i should have refreshed first

El Padrino said...

zeke but i loved seeing buddy ryan relaxing in a chair drinking a beer

that was cool

Isiah Thomas said...

I zoned out after 4 words of the Sport's Ho's sidebar...

Good call Rev, just do away with it. Bad idea.

Almost makes you feel bad for the SG, she sounds miserable. I hope she is really hot for his sake.

Isiah Thomas said...

I'm with ya EP, what part of the country is he in? I was wondering, if he's on the West Coast, that was an early game so he was pounding beers at 10 o'clock. Which I respect. If he's on the East, eh.

Looked like he wanted to drop a few n bombs if you ask me.

Spaceman Spiff said...

she isnt even the original sports gal.

El Padrino said...

it was sunny so im saying west coast, arizona maybe
unless it was florida

Isiah Thomas said...

RIP B.I.G.

I used to work half a block from where he was shot in LA. Always thought of that as I walked by the place.

RIP.

El Padrino said...

im pouring out half my corona tonight for biggie

that was the man

Spaceman Spiff said...

US is getting owned in the Ryder Cup, again

ToddPacker said...

Mr Smalls was the shit.

SG without a doubt jumped the shark from the fucking free throw line.

blah blah blah Redsox, blah blah blah Pats, blah blah Papi, blah Celtics,

He sucks
His articles suck
His picks suck
His gay names for his friends suck

Some of his pop culture shit is OK the first 2 or 3 times, but that dude can beat a fuckin joke into the ground

A buddy of mine (Hard core Yankee fan) bought the SG Redsox book to give to another buddy (Hard core Sawks fan) as a b-day gift. Later that night hangin out in some bar, we ponied up 50 bucks to give to some drunk guy to whipe his ass with the book...good times... Everytime I see that little side bar on an SG article pushing that book, I think about this drunk guy handing the book back to my friend with ass-drippings.

El Padrino said...

awesome

http://www.deadspin.com/sports/baseball/must-be-sittin-in-the-front-row-202579.php

Spaceman Spiff said...

i think its safe to say she loves the cock

ToddPacker said...

best comment:

Based on the amount of back fat, I'd say she was hungry

El Padrino said...

hot dog anyone?

The Rev said...

Honestly, this is the first time I'm disappointed in SG's writings.

He can still come up with a great read like the Lambeau Field/Milwaukee article a few weeks back. That's the type of writing that made me keep reading him. I still will read him.

But this whole Sports Gal writing the sidebar gimmick is not good. I mean, as you read his column, you get tempted to read what she wrote and you get sucked in for a few seconds only to stop reading her sidebar because you don't like it.

It's not like you can choose to click on her link or not click on her link to read it or avoid it as you choose. It invades the space and your eyes go to it for at least a few seconds. Those are seconds you'll never get back in life.

And really, the fact that she is beating him in football picks makes him look pretty bad. I could handle it when he simply lost games. We all lose picks. Some of us lose a lot of them. But to volunteer to possibly get outshined by someone who knows nothing about football is just destined to go wrong.

Let's put it this way... if he were reading a writer that he liked to make fun of doing something like this and failing, he'd be making fun of it left and right comparing it to a bad episode of BH 90210 or something.

The Rev said...

I saw RFK last week on my quick Washington trip. There wasn't a game, so I just saw the outside and some of the inside through the gates. It's an ugly ass stadium.

I'd need a blow job just to sit through a game there. That's the only way it would be enjoyable.

Spaceman Spiff said...

worst comment nominee

Shenanigans says:

I'm sure she just dropped something. IN HIS PANTS! Hey Oh!

Martin VanNostrand said...

White House Intern night?

Spaceman Spiff said...

i dont know whos left out there but you have to see this, kills me every time. its a video, better with sound, but sufficient without

http://www.dumpalink.com/media/1158743046/Ultra_Violence

Spaceman Spiff said...

Ultra_Violence

ToddPacker said...

good stuff Spiff

I've seen the dude who nails his head, while trying to do a flip before....I love when he's still swinging the nun-chucks around when he falling off balance...

Martin VanNostrand said...

spaceman that is awesome. I had seen the clip of the dude with the fro attempting the flip before. funny stuff. I'm out.

Martin VanNostrand said...

tp had seen it too. shoulda refreshed.

Isiah Thomas said...

RFK is a sweet ass stadium Rev.

The Rev said...

Zeke, maybe it was 15 years ago. But what I saw was not that great.

Believe me, I know bad stadiums. I practically lived at Veterans Stadium my whole life. And I admit it was a dump.

Isiah Thomas said...

it looks like shit, and its in a shitty part of DC but its a great stadium inside.

Spaceman Spiff said...

i also like the fourth guy who falls down doing horrible spin kicks and they ask him if hes ok, he responds with a cocky "oh im good, pssh"

mound of venus said...

answer this, fellas. greg jennings vs. lions or jerricho cotchery vs. bills this week?

Spaceman Spiff said...

cotchery no doubt, coles is hurt ,cotchery gonna see all the balls, plus driver gets like 90 percent of favres eyesight every play

Spaceman Spiff said...

jackie chan was in a porno 30 years ago called 'all in the family'

"I had to do anything I could to make a living 31 years ago, but I don't think it's a big deal, even Marlon Brando used to be exposed in his movies. The porn movie at that time was more conservative than the current films"

mound of venus said...

i like the certainty. thank you. i just am nervous about this one last slot in my lineup. hopefully, cotchery comes through.

thejaywhite said...

i like hearing from the sports gal..and i still like all his writings...i love when he compares sports to tv shows..hes an NBA specialist thats why u dont like his articles as much right now..hes real good when talking about NBA

Spaceman Spiff said...

im playing cotchery in our LOV league this week, so you can know im not trying to sabotage

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