Sunday, November 29, 2015


Oak -1 over TITANS
Just think Oakland is better.  Throw out the 1pm thing for now.  Going to Minny Soda was a rough one but the Vikings are good.  The Titans aren't any good.  Amari Cooper with a ya huge day.

Buf +5 over KC
The Chiefs at home are tough to go against, especially when they are playing well but Baffalo is a time that can put that crowd on their shoulder like a chip and surprise some people.  I like the Bills in an upset to win. 

INDY -3 over Tampa
Tampa has been surprising but I think the Colts may have found something finally.  What division is worse?  AFC South or NFC East?

Giants -2 over WASH
Skins can jump back in the race with a win here.  Lol.  But the Culliver injury on Thanksgiving has to sting the nostrils.  Imagine how it's Thanksgiving, can't wait to eat grammas yams and pies OH GOD I TORE MY KNEE APART!  Man that sucks.  Plus ELI >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Cousins and you all know this.

Saints +3 over TEXANS
Can honestly see the Texans winning but and it's a minor but, the fact that this is indoors on turf.....close to home (short flight) I think the Saints have a shot here.  Typically the Saints on the road west of the Mississippi on grass are just awful but the elements here favor them and they are better, not sure what Romeo Crennel was able to use to motivate that defense but they are playing a lot better.  Real test today. 

Minny +2.5 over FALCONS
Vikes bounce back, watched Green Bay shit the bed on Thursday helps motivate this team to rise up.  Falcons are trending downward.

St. Louis +9 over CINCY
9?  With Gurley and Aaron Donald on the other side?  This line is blasphemy.

JAX -4.5 over San Diego
Hello OVER46.5!  IF the Chargers can find a WR to dress that can actually play.  Poor Rivers.

NYJ -4 over Miami
I'm a -6 on the confident scale about this pick.  But I can't take Tannyhill in this spot.  Desperate team at home looking at today's game to spring them forward down the stretch. 

Az -9 over SF
Man what a mess left behind by poor management of this franchise.  You think Bill Parcells was easy to get along with?  You think Bob Ross didn't treat his production crew like shit?  I SAID YOU SHOOT THE PRETTY LITTLE TREES UNTIL YOU CAN'T STAND NO MORE SHITBAG!  Successful people are typically assholes.  It's ok, part of life.  Deal with it and shine the gold.  The hedgehog ain't a head coach man.  Cmon.  Shameful what happened in the bay.

Steelers +3.5 over HAWKS
Inconsistent defense/secondary facing a high powered offense.  What's the worst that can happen?  By the way when they are good they are called legion of boom, what about when they are bad? 

New England -2.5 over DEN
Would like to see Denver here knock them off just to hear a week's worth of sportstalk about manning / osweiller controversy but I don't see it.  It will be Brandon LaFell or Brandon Bolden or some jerk we never heard of.  It's the system guys, not the players.

BROWNS -3 over Ravens
No one cares. 

Thursday, November 26, 2015

Thanksgiving day picks

Happy thanksgiving, looking forward to some crazy football and lots of beer today.

Black Friday has lost its luster to me.  Maybe it's because I already have everything I want, but for the most part, the deals just seem stupid anymore.  I'm not going out at 6pm or 8pm tonight to get call of duty for $7 cheaper.  If you don't have a TV by now, you don't deserve one even if it's super cheap.

Last week was a much better week for me, I went 9-5 and moved my record up to 75-64-4.  EP did not have a good week going 3-10, but overall is still better winning percentage wise at 73-56-4.  I'm thankful that I now have more wins again, even if it took me 10 more games.

Eagles +2.5 vs Lions
I don't think the eagles are as bad as they looked last week, and I don't think the lions are that good either.  Lions used to have an advantage playing at home on Thanksgiving day, but now everybody plays on thursdays at some point during the week, so everybody had their thursday prep schedule.  Sanchez will look to atone for his last thanksgiving debacle, so I give them the best chance in winning this game.  They'll take this one 27-24.

Panthers +1 vs Cowboys
In what world is a 10-0 team the underdog against a 3-7 team.  That's just stupid.  I've seen a lot of people taking the cowboys this week, but that's because Romo is back, and they barely beat the dolphins last week.  Panthers have Cam, and a great defense.  Should win this one pretty easily 28-10.

Bears +8.5 vs Packers
Packers at night at home, is a very good play.  I don't think the Bears can win this game, but 8.5 is just too many points.  The Bears have played everyone tight lately, and I like what Cutler has going.  Not sure why Fox moved away from langford last week, but I think he has a big day.  Packers win by a FG 27-24.

Raiders (pick'em) vs Titans 
I'll take the raiders here for no reason other than I think they're due.  Titans are better than their record, but the raiders are the better team.  Should win this one pretty easily.  I like Derek Carr to throw 4 TDs and get the ship headed in the right direction.  Raiders win 34-27.

Bills +7 vs Chiefs
Bills only lost to the Pats by 7 in New England.  So the line setters think the Chiefs are as good as the pats, got it.  This is a stupid line.  The chiefs have been playing better, but against a bunch of shitty teams.  The bills get right and maybe they don't win, but they at least keep it close.   Hell I'll take the bills to win.  24-23.

Bucs +3 vs Colts
Bucs are playing really really well.  The colts should not have won last week, if it wasn't for Matt Ryan and the entire Falcons team imploding, the colts don't win.  Winston has started to really prove he was worth that first pick, and other than the fact you're always afraid he's going to make a big mistake, he's got some really good weapons around him.  Dirk Koetter has done a great job of setting him up for success.  Bucs win 31-24

Giants -2.5 vs Skins
G-men are better than the skins.  That's all i've got.  Giants 27-14.

Texans -3 vs Saints
This is probably wrong, Saints defense will probably be better with Dennis Allen calling the signals, although the raiders defense wasn't much to right home about when he was there.  Texans defense has been playing better, and I said I wouldn't pick the texans again this year, so there's that.  Texans win this one  38-21.

Vikings (pick'em) vs Falcons
I'm off the falcons forever I think.  The vikings are coming of an ass beating, and are a much better team than they showed last week.  They'll get back to feeding the machine, and playing good defense.  The falcons just find new ways to lose every week.  Vikings win 24-21.

Bengals -10 vs Rams
prayers for steadman bailey.  Feel bad for the dude, very lucky he isn't dead.  You can take the kid out of the ghetto, but whatever the rest of that goes.  At some point, you think these millionaires would learn they can't hang with the hood rats anymore.  but i digress, it's not his fault, nobody deserves to get shot in the head, except maybe Aaron Hernandez.    Bengals have been frustrated the last couple weeks, and should get back on track.  Throw it to AJ green when in doubt.  Rams are a mess, and they let their QB finish the game last week when he couldn't even stand up.  Bengals win big at home 42-20.

Jaguars -4 vs Chargers
Chargers are too one dimensional right now.  Jags are playing really well lately.  This one is probably wrong too, but early game, eastern time zone wins out over the jags maybe not being the better team.  Jags win 31-20.

Jets -3 vs Dolphins
Jets have been a huge disappointment the last few weeks.  I don't have a strong feeling either way about this game, so i'll take the home team and lay the points.  Jets win 24-20

Cardinals -11.5 vs 49ers
Cardinals are probably the most impressive team in the NFC right now.  49ers are still starting Blaine Gabbert right?  2 TD win for the cards here, 28-14

Seahawks -3.5 vs Steelers
This is a pretty close game.  rematch of a superbowl.  Seahawks need this game more than the steelers do.  I think home field makes the difference here, it may be a closer game but I think the seahawks win anyway, 24-20.

Patriots -2.5 vs Broncos
I wish this wasn't the case, but I don't trust Osweiler to beat Brady and Belichick.  A normal team, i'd say couldn't overcome losing Edelman, Lewis, and possibly Amendola, but Brady and the pats are not a normal team.  Seems like this game is always in New England, so since its in Denver, the crowd should be raucous.  Pats defense is better than the Bears was last week, and Brady gets rid of the ball quick enough to neutralize the broncos pass rush.  I'll take the Pats 24-20.

Browns -3 vs Ravens
Ravens without flacco and forsett, really?  Browns have won games with McCown, and probably have more talent on offense than the ravens.  The Johnny football era has ended, and so has the Mike Pettine era in cleveland.  I'll take the browns to win big-ish, 28-10.

Friday, November 20, 2015


Amazing how Black Friday as evolved.  From an innocent way to categorize an especially profitable day in retail to running ridiculous sales a full week before Thanksgiving.  America is the best and the worst at the same time.

Singles Day in China is bigger by the way.

Fucking China

Are there any players in the NFL you miss?   I was thinking with Peyton on his way out, I'm going to miss watching him.  Started to think of other players I miss.  Steve McNair.  Tough dude.  I miss Warren Moon going back to my adolescent days watching with my Dad and Pop Pop.  Randal Cunningham even when he was killing my gmen.  Miss Mike Alstott because he was a wrecking ball.  Miss Easy Ed McCaffery.  Joy watching his son running in Stanford.  Miss Barry.  You know there was only one Barry.  Speaking of the Lions miss the Wayne Fontes firing clock, will they pull it out on Turkey day and save his job?  Enjoyed Willie Roaf Beef!  I can go on and on.

Big boxing match this weekend.

Props to Frank Beamer coaching his last game in Blacksburg this weekend.  Great leader.

I think Brian Windhorst smells like cold cuts.

Oak even over DET
We'll see if the Raiders are for real.  If they can't go on the road and beat the Lions then they are mediocre and not a playoff contender.

Colts +5 over ATL
If Atlanta had a pass rush I'd take them but I think because they don't it doesn't matter how old and not mobile Hassy is.  They keep it close.

Jets -3 over HOU
The Jets have matchups all over the place.  They should beat Houston pretty good.  That d line should be able to dominate up front and I'm sure Bowles will make it rain blitzes.

PHILLY -5.5 over Bucs
I thin Sanchez runs that offense better than Bradtard.

Denver even over BEARS
Cutty has been lights out.  No Ware but I think the Broncos have enough defense to really give that offensive line problems.  And I like Osweiller.  Think he'll be fine and I think they'll be able to open up the playbook a bit and call a more aggressive game.  There are throws Peyton just can't make anymore.

St Loo +2 over RAVENS
Baltimore got robbed but put themselves in that position with what I've been saying all year.  Horrendous secondary.  Once the Rams get their playmakers going the Flacco's won't be able to keep up.

Dallas even over MIAMI
Romo makes all the difference in the world.  Boys get off the schneid.

Skins +8.5 over CAR
The later it gets, the tougher it gets.  Margins become less and less.  Give me those points.  If Kirk Cousins scores and does that Cam dance, the internet will fall apart.

SD +3 over Chiefs
I'm zagging because everyone else is zigging.  Apparentely KC is bout to go on a run straight to a division playoff game because they have an easy schedule and they have been playing well as of late.  One more tidbit, retiring of Tomlinson's jersey at halftime. 

MIN even over Green Bay
Game of the week.  The Packers are really struggling, getting nothing from the RB position leaving it all on Rodgers.  WR's can't seem to get open consistently and the defense is on the field way too long.  Meanwhile Peterson is hitting his stride and that defense is big and nasty.  Changing of the guard.  I believe in purple.  Hope Kodiac130 is watching.

San Fran +13.5 over SEATTLE
It's like the handicappers WANT Seattle to be the Seattle of old at home.  They have been putrid at home.  Wildly inconsistent on defense and even more inconsistent on offense.  That offensive line is a problem.  I don't know how the Niners are going to score points but I think the spread is too high.  Would lay 8-10. 

ARI -4.5 over Bengals
The first flex of the season!  Remember when Carson Palmer quit on the Bengals?  That was fun.  I think the Cardinals secondary might be the best in football.  NS. The Red BB gun is going to struggle.

Buf 8.5 over NE
You think Amendola is a little pissed EVERYONE including Brady is all like well you can't replace a Julian Edelman.  He basically runs the same routes as Edelman.  If you didn't give them a name or number they would look like the same WR.  Maybe Edelman is quicker.  Anyway Rex has one less thing to worry about so he can maybe try and for real cover Gronk.  See what happens from there.  Problem is the Bills need to find out a way to score points.

Wednesday, November 18, 2015

woody the wood picks

I went 5-9 last week and I'm now 66-59-4.  don't listen to me anymore.  EP went 9-4,and is 70-46-4 listen to him.

Craziness all around. The stuff going on in Paris, heightened security at all sporting events, people are blowing up planes again.  People are threatening to blow up planes again.  The Lions are winning in Wisconsin. Tiger is coaching the Ryder cup.  and his blood is giving HIV to Charlie Sheen. Just a great time to be alive.  I'm probably in the minority here, but I think this is a case where genocide is actually justified.  It worked with the nazis (i think), so lets just wipe those fuckers completely off the planet.  Be done with it.  (not the packers and the lions, but i'm ok with all the others)

Also the NY attorney general sent me an email and asked me to cease and desist on DFS advise*.  Other than Langford, most of my advise* was awful anyway.

Jaguars -2.5 vs Titans
I like Blake Bortles.  I like Marcus Mariota.  This could be the best division in football in two years. If the Jags win, and the Colts and Texans lose (both likely), the Jags would suddenly be in 1st place. This is my sneaky favorite team to watch on Sunday's weird. Anyway, I think the Jags are the better team here, this will probably be a shootout, and i'll take the home team.  38-35

Broncos pickem vs Bears 
The Brock Osweiler era begins in Chicago, against John Fox and Adam Gase, and Jay Cutler.  I'm in the "I think he'll be OK" camp for Brock.  He's probably better than most backups.  Worst case scenario, he keeps it close.  They'll run the ball, the defense for the Bears isn't very good, so a good place to get your first start.  I've changed my answer on this one about 4 times now, so i'm going with the team that has the better defense.  In the end, I think the D gets it done.  I mean if Tebow can win games in the NFL, then Osweiler should be able to, right?  Broncos 17-10.

Raiders -1 vs Lions
Raiders are weird, they're good, and they're bad.  The Lions didn't look great against the Packers, but the packers looked awful.  So i'm going with the Raiders here.  I'm hoping the Raiders get back to running the ball, and using Amari Cooper.  I think they have enough this week though, 28-21.

Falcons -5.5 vs Colts
Colts will probably win this game because I can't pick anything right.  The falcons have been awful the last 4 weeks, the Colts had their biggest win of the season, and then a bye.  I like Hasselbeck, but he's like 43 years old.  I think the falcons figure it out 27-20

Jets (off) vs Texans
I doubt Hoyer is going to play, i don't pick the texans in any game anymore, which maybe burns me, but I hate them.  Your trash talk game is very weak, JJ Watt.  The jets have had a couple of bad performances in a row since playing the Pats pretty tough.  It's time they get back to running the rock and blastin fools.  And throw it to Brandon Marshall more #fantasyreasons.  Jets win in a low scoring affair.  15-12 (all field goals).

Eagles -5.5 vs bucs
I like Winston, he's got some moxie.  But it's tough for a young kid to win on the road, especially in philly.  Bradford probably won't play, but I think Sanchez is a very capable backup, and he's been in the system a while now.  Eagles will run the ball, Ryan Mathews actually is the better running back here, but they paid so much for Murray that Chip will keep forcing him the rock.  I think the eagles win this one going away.  31-17.

Rams +1 vs Ravens
Rams huh? Got your asses handed to you at home last week.  Now we're going to start Case Keenum.  Who wasn't awful when playing for the Texans in the past. The Ravens just don't have anything offensively or defensively.  They have a lot of pride, but I think that Gurley runs all over them, and Keenum does enough to win the game for the Rams, and that solid D-line.  Rams win 21-17

Cowboys pickem vs Dolphins
I guess Romo is coming back.  He'll make a difference for this team, he's gotta be better than Cassel or Weeden right?  Doesn't he have the worst directv commercials of all of them.  I mean, his aren't even funny.  Cowboys season is probably over already anyway, and the Dolphins will be after this game.  The fish just don't have it.  Cowboys win 24-23

Panthers -8.5 vs Redskins
Kirk Cousins won't have a perfect QB rating this week, guaranteed.  So you go from playing 7 on 7 to playing a panthers team that you can't complete a pass against.  Cousins will throw a couple of picks, and he always loses when that happens.  Panthers are sneaky good.  Their offense is under the radar, their defense is stout, their dancing is on point.  I'm going to go out on a limb here and say they could be in the NFC championship game.  Panthers win by scoring 4 tds, a FG and a safety and a 2 point conversion, 34-17

Chargers +3 vs Chiefs
I'm probably smoking crack here.  But the chiefs are feeling to good about themselves after beating the Broncos.  The Chargers are coming off a bye, and gotta be feeling the heat.  This is one of those games where I pick whoever is home, and that's the chargers.  31-28

Packers pickem vs Vikings
I sure won't be giving any points for the Pack.  It's gotten embarrassing there.  But their backs are up against the wall now, do you really think A-rodg is going to lose 4 in a row?  Me neither.  The vikings are due for a letdown.  Packers 26-17

Seahawks -13.5 vs 49ers
This is probably too many points, but I saw the Seahawks dismantle this team a couple of weeks ago.  Now they're at home, with their playoff lives hanging in the balance.  And Blaine Gabbert maybe for one week, but not on the road against a usually top notch defense. Last week was more about the cardinals than the seahawks, so i'm taking the home team here in a lot.  24-10.

Bengals +5 vs Cardinals
I probably would have picked this game differently had the cardinals lost and the bengals won last week.  Texans just seem to have Andy Dalton's number.  Bengals are too good to be getting 5 points. Too much talent on that team.  I'm not sure who is going to win, so I won't make a prediction, but i'll take the points.

Patriots -7.5 vs Bills
If this was a stupid line, i'd take the bills, but the Pats are really good at home.  And now they have a week to adjust to the Edelman injury.  I still think the OBJ catch in the endzone was a catch.  They need to just change the rule to say anybody who exhibits control over the football with 2 feet down, it's a catch.  Who cares if you take it to the ground, or if somebody strips you, or you have to make a football move, or any of that shit, just catch it, and it's a catch.  That has nothing to do with this game, but the Giants have a bye and I needed somewhere to bitch about it.  Bills aren't good enough to hang with the Pats this year.  34-20.

Saturday, November 14, 2015


Det +12 over GREEN BAY
Just too many points

Dal +1 over TB
Dallas's D has been losing these games not shitty back up QB's.

Car -4 over TITANS
Tennessee had the mojo last weekend.  Carolina don't need mojo.

STL -7.5 over Bears
Chicago hangs around but the Rams defense is scary and I bet they like their reputation.

SKINS @ pick em over Saints
I got nothing here.

Miami +7.5 over PHI
Like Lamar Miller being the offense for Miami, Bradford still doesn't look comfortable in this offense

PIT -5.5 over Browns
Don't matter if Big Ben out, Steelers D is playing really well and ranked in top ten.

Jax +4 over BAL
The Jags can spin the rock.  Baltimore's secondary is Jarlsberg.

OAK -2.5 over Vikes
Great game.  Two young up and coming squads.  Like the home team in evenly matched teams when it involves a time zone or two.

NYG +9 over Pats
Either the Gmen find a pass rush with smoke and mirrors or this is a rout.  My heart says they stay close.

DENVER -4.5 over Chiefs
Peyton rebounds, KC is all but done

AZ +2.5 over Hawks
Did Seattle get a new offensive line during the bye?  If not Arizona is better.

Hou +12.5 over BENGALS
Each win will be by less and less.  Winning =  Pressure...... Houston stinks but this is a mess of points.  Hoyer stable and I bet they fixed a thing or two on the defensive side.

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

nose picking

Obviously I'm not very good at this picking stuff anymore.  Two straight weeks with losing records.  Maybe I try and get too cute.  Maybe I don't know anything about football.  Maybe Paulie will let me keep my knees after this week.

Apparently daily fantasy is now illegal in New York, so if you are in New York, don't take any of this advise* and use it in any illegal gambling rings.  I'm not paid for these opinions (nobody would pay me, i tried) so FBI please leave LOV alone.

Unbelievable that i'm now worse in picks than EP.  I'm slipping

Unbelievable that the Broncos imploded twice with stupid penalties in the final minute of a game they could have/should have won.

Unbelievable that the Packers have been stomped two weeks in a row....R-E-L-A-X

Unbelievable that the sponsors for the cowboys haven't put pressure on them, like the ones did last year with the Vikings

On to the picks.  Last week I was 5-8, and overall record for me is 61-50-5 (.549)...keeping Paulie at bay for another week.  EP went 8-4 and after a couple of strong weeks is now 61-42-4 (.592), listen to his picks if you're going to illegally gamble at DraftKings or FanDuel in New York, not mine, i'm no good and not paid for this info or endorse gambling at all.

JETS -2.5 v Bills
This one could go anywhere.  I think that Rex typically gets his ass kicked when he starts running his mouth and doing stupid things, so that's why I pick the Jets, plus they're at home.  And the bills are a little banged up, and Revis OWNS Sammy Watkins.  Jets offense is a stinkfest right now, Bilal Powell might be your DFS play this week in this game, or Karlos Williams on the cheap.   Jets win 24-20

Packers -13 v Lions
How about a get right game for the pack?  How come the only team that fired a coach and hasn't seen improvement is the Lions?  Everyone else played better for at least a week.  Maybe with the bye last week, Jim Bob has created some new coolness.  DFS play here is Jimmy Starks, he's taken over the lead role for the packers, Lacy is hurt, and they should be ahead by 3 TDs by the middle of the 2nd quarter and can just run it the entire 2nd half.  Plus the lions run defense blows.  Pack win this one going away 35-13.

Bucs -1 v Cowboys
Not many games this year where the Bucs have been favored.  Not many games this year where the Bucs have the edge at QB.  My DFS play here is run DMC, if he's cheap enough.  Since taking over the starting spot, he's averaging 111 yards rushing per game, plus he's good for a few catches as well.  Jameis Winston might not be a bad DFS play either, he's quietly not thrown an interception in 4 straight games, and he hasn't raped anyone, stolen any crablegs, or yelled cunt in public all season, so that's a win.  I'm taking the bucs here 35-31.

Panthers -5.5 v Titans
Titans had their fun last week.  Panthers defense is about a google times better than the Saints though.  Google is a number, look it up, although i think it's spelt googol or something, but we're not about spelling here, just learnin. DFS pick here is Panthers defense.  Might be spendy, but they're gonna have a return or defensive TD this week.  Count on it, put it in stone.  Panthers should win easily and move to 9-0, bye* the score of 31-17.

Bears +7.5 v Rams
Rams defense is tough at home.  And they have Jim Brown as their running back.  he'd be a good DFS pick, but I can't find Jim Brown in the rosters, so whatever.  Bears have kept every game close.  Cutler doesn't look lost too much, sometimes, but not too much.  He makes sure and throw picks and bad decisions early so they can still catchup later in the game.  DFS pick here is Jeremy Langford (not sure if any of that name is right), but he looked great against a crappy chargers team, and I bet he's cheap.  If this rams pass rush gets going, you'll see a lot of dump off and screens to langford, and he probably marks the end of Matt Forte in Chicago.  he's getting wally pipped.  Rams probably win, but not by a lot, Rams 24-21.  (this is one where I get too cute and think i'm so smart, you should probably pick the other way)

Saints (pick'em) v Redskins
I'll take the team with the better QB because this is going to be a shootout.  I'm probably wrong on this one.  DFS says to pick Willie Snead, but he's too popular, Ben Watson is a good choice here.  The Saints have been using the TE, and figuring out how to live without Jimmy Graham.  Both defenses suck, and Drew Brees seems to have gotten some of his mojo back, so we shall see.  Saints win 42-41.

Dolphins (+7) v Eagles
I don't think the eagles have only won two games by 7 points or more (giants and saints and cowboys) editor's note: that's three.  blue's note: I said I don't think they've only won 2 games, so I was right.  Anyway, Dolphins front 7 will demolish the shitty blocking schemes that the eagles have going for them.  Not sure that the fish* have enough to win this game, but shouldn't be 7 point dogs.  DFS sneaky pick here is Ryan Mathews.  It's a gamble, I know, but then that's why it's illegal in New York.  Dolphins keep it close and win on a hail mary by tannehill to Mike Wallace, 35-31.  (I know mike wallace isn't on the team anymore, just replace that name with jarvis landry)

Browns +4.5 v Steelers
I've now picked 4 straight road teams, all unfavored.  This is why I suck.  I can't reasonably pick Landry Jones, and Deangelo Williams.  I just can't.  Even if they make me use Johnny Football this week, I just can't pick the steelers to win.  It's not possible.  Steelers are goodish at home.  Antonio Bryant is unhuman, not like a zombie, but like an alien.  are zombies considered human?  I mean maybe, but there could be zombie other species too right?  anyway.  DFS pick here is nobody, because this game licks balls.  If you're using somebody from this game it should only be Barnidge, and only if McCown is playing.  Browns win 41-10 (does the score really matter?)

Ravens -5.5 v Jaguars
Ravens coming out of the bye, they're about to reel off 8 straight wins and make the playoffs at 10-6, move on and win the superbowl.  book your tickets to Santa Clara now Flacco.  From a DFS perspective, I like Blake Bortles.  The guy puts up numbers.  Especially if you can get in a league where you don't get negative points for turnovers.  But he runs for more yards than you'd expect and throws for a lot and for TDs.  He's maybe a top 5 fantasy QB this year...i don't know, but it sounds good.  Ravens run the ball, control the clock, and start their 8 game streak here.  42-35

Raiders -3 v Vikings
Consider me a believer in the Raiders.  I'm not a believer in the Vikings.  I'm probably wrong on both accounts, but damn if the raiders haven't been impressive, maybe it's just that they're impressive because everyone thought they would suck, i don't know.  Is teddy ballgame playing?  Dude got knocked out cold, if the concussion protocol allows for him to play this week, well he should just apply for his payment from the NFL's class action lawsuit.  DFS play, if teddy ballgame plays, then lets got with Stefon Diggs.  If he doesn't, you can't go wrong with Michael Crabtree.  Teams are rolling coverages like crazy to try and contain Amari Cooper, and leaving the crabapple open a lot.  Old man still has a little left in the tank.

Patriots -8.5 v Giants
This game, I swear.  I want to pick the Giant so badly.  So so badly, but I can't.  There just isn't a reason other than "eli owns tom brady" or something to that effect.  "coughlin eats belichik's lunch" or some other stupid thing that doesn't make any sense.  Pats are gigantic, enormous chips on their shoulder for this game.  They won't sleep through this one, no way.  DFS play is probably LG Blount, but only because i'm going to sit him this week.  Dion Lewis gone for the season means LG gets a few more looks, but if the Pats determine it's a passing week (and why wouldn't you, did you see what Drew Brees did), then LG is maybe a 32 yards rushing guy.  I mean you could go OBJ or Gronk, but what fun is that, anyone can pick those guys.  In the end the pats have too much here.  49-7.

Broncos -5.5 v Chiefs
Chiefs coming off a bye after their trip to London.  Broncos coming off a stinkfest in Indy where they did everything possible to shoot themselves in the eye.  Broncos are the better team, Manning will break a couple of records for the home crowd this week, as opposed to the home crowd last week.  Broncos defense will be pissed, and the chefs still have Alex Smith, and no Jamaal Charles.  DFS pick here is Travis Kelce maybe.  I don't know, all the options in this game suck.  Broncos win 39-21

Cardinals +3 v Seahawks
Can't believe the seahawks are favored here.  Cardinals won in Seattle last year.  That might not be right, but i'm not looking it up.  They're the better team, the faster team.  The stronger team, the better team.  DFS Chris Johnson.  I'm running out of steam.  Cards win 31-17

Bengals -12 v Texans
Outside of the Patriots, most impressive team i've seen all year.  Also said I wasn't picking the Texans for the rest of the year.  I think this is the week Jeremy Hill gets it going, and rushes for about 150 yards, making him my DFS pick.  Bengals win in a blowout on Monday night, in all orange, or all black, or whatever they wear.  45-14.

On a side note, i've never played daily fantasy and have no idea how it works, so with all recommendations, it's buyer beware, almost like it's gambling (which is illegal in New York).

Friday, November 06, 2015


I like to dunk my kids leftover chicken nuggets in siracha.

and drink beers with that.

bought a BJ's sized bag of Pierogies and have been crushing them

pretty soon I wont be able to ride a motorbike

CAR +3 over Green Bay
I went back and forth on this but ultimately being underdogs at 7-0 is the chipiest chip on the Panthers shoulders who already had a thousand chips on them.  Does that make any sense?  Maybe not but I am legend.  Green Bay is not getting open.  Give home dog getting disrespected with a good defense any day of the week.

NE -15 over Wash
This is the part of the program where the Pats just whitewash everyone.

Ten +9 over SAINTS
New coach mojo.  Extremely bitter on line #2 for Matt Leinart! 

BUFF -2.5 over Miami
This usually plays out to the home and away series split.  Buffalo is home and gets some T-Mobile juice back.  I am worried Rex is looking ahead to Thursday night but think the crowd is that much of an advantage.  Even with Miami's time to prepare.

MINNY -1.5 over Rams
They are billing this as the Old AP vs. the New AP.  I wonder if Gurley knocks his kid around with tree branches?  Norv surprises everyone and leans on the Teddy to get it done.  Tem mentioned Whizzinator being one of those over his head coaches, like he's a great coordinator but not a good HC.  Agree, hundreds like this. I put Norv in that boat.  He's a hell of a play caller.

Jax +9 over JETS
NYJ shouldn't be giving any team that many points.  Especially after just getting smoked.

PIT -4 over Oak
Too young the Raiders to go on the road and get that 1pm victory.  The Steelers defense is coming around and they know how to play without Bell already.

Giants -2.5 over TAMPA
Think the defense bounces back, maybe get a lift from Jason Pierre Claw.  Also I sense the offense is hot, I called it last week.  I think it continues.  Even without Cruz

SF +7.5 over Falcons
Atlanta sucks.  Fuck them.  Fools gold ass niggas.

Manning -5 over COLTS
When is Chuckstrong getting canned?!!!!  With a record to break in front of the team he carried for years this is such an easy call here.  Throw in the fact the Denver D will harass Luck into more shitty decisions I don't think there is a chance in hell Denver doesn't win by at least a TD

DALLAS -3 over Eagles
I think it ends here.  Sadly.  Might as well be vs. Eagles though.  Keep this division shitty boys.  Cassel third week, defense is coming together a bit and Dez fully participating.  I think they should run some wildcat too with DMC.

CHARGERS -4 over Bears
Jeez what a shitty game.  Gruden will slob hard over Rivers.  No Keenan Allen which destroyed my fantasy team. 

Thursday, November 05, 2015

blue's picks a pack of pickled peppers picks

This west coast thing gets me everytime.  By the time I get to work, it's like lunchtime on the least coast.  Also sports are usually over before prime time shows come on here, which is alright by me.

On to the picks...I finally got a thursday night game right, then proceeded to vomit all over the rest of my picks.  I finished the week at 5-7-2, where as EP was 7-4-1, so i'm a little bit angry over here.  I'm now 56-42-5 (.571), still in the money, but not nearly as good as I used to be.  EP is 53-38-4 (.582), so he's ahead of me by percentage points.  But not hockey points, I would be winning in hockey.

Browns +11 vs Bengals
Another Thursday night game i'll get wrong probably.  Never know with Johnny football..divisional foes. I thought i heard somewhere that the Browns have actually won 3 of the last 5 games against the Bengals.  That may or may not be true.  Bottom line, too many points for a team that only scored 16 total last week against a very average Steelers defense. Browns have been close in pretty much every game, that may be a lie, I don't know.  I'm taking the Browns to cover, but Bengals to win 24-17.

Packers -2.5 vs Panthers
This is a tough game to pick.  Panthers were lucky to pull out the win after just about choking it away to the Colts.  I still think the Panthers are a great defense, and then all smoke and mirrors on offense.  The Pack got humiliated on national TV, and are again, a road favorite to an undefeated team.  I think the Packers play pissed off this week, and win a game that could be pivotal into who gets home field throughout the playoffs.  If they lose this game, no chance they'll have home field all the way through.  I'm taking the packers here, in a close one, 24-21.

Redskins +15 vs Patriots
15 seems like a lot of points.  The redskins get paid too.  I'll probably regret this one on Monday, but I think they can keep it closer than 2 TDs.  Pats defense isn't really that good.  Pats will win 34-20.

Titans +9.5 vs Saints
Went back and forth on this one.  Not sure firing Whisenhunt was the right move, but I don't know what goes on in Tennessee.  I mean, sure he's lost a lot of games, but he had Zach Mettenberger for 8 of those games, is that a fair assessment?  Anyway, this line is too high because of the shootout that the saints had last week.  Drew Brees is back, right?  Or maybe the Giants just suck. Mariota should be back, the titans will run the ball this week, and then throw it too. They'll use that new coach mojo to at least keep it close, probably lose. Saints win 34-30 because they are at home.

 Bills -3 vs Dolphins
This one I don't know.  I want to take the dolphins because the bills are only 1-3 at home, and haven't looked good in weeks.  But they have Tyrod Taylor back, and all their weapons on offense are back.  Dolphins got smashed by the Pats last week, and are a good enough team.  This is an elimination game...the loser has no shot at the playoffs, and I think the dolphins when they get behind, have no chance.  I'm taking the Bills here 24-20.

Familia just blew another save

Rams +2.5 vs Vikings
Is it just me, or does Teddy Bridgewater wear the biggest gloves in the world?  I know he has small hands, or at least that's what they said at the combine, so I get wearing a glove for better grip.  But Peyton Manning wears a glove, and it's like a Neoprene reciever type glove.  Bridgewater's glove looks like a ski glove, big and bulky and white. Maybe it's just me...I'm taking the new ADP (Todd Gurley) in this game over the old ADP.  Rams will run the ball and play good defense.  These are two extremely similar teams, but I think the Rams D is just a little bit better.  Rams win a close one 24-23.

Jets (no line) vs Jaguars
I'm guessing there isn't a line yet because nobody is sure who the JETS QB is going to be.  Either way, they've lost 2 straight and are ready to get some ass kicking going.  They get to play another young up and coming QB this week, but it was the running game that killed them against the Raiders.  Jets acted like they could just show up last week and win the game.   Bortles has gotten a lot better, but the JETS secondary will be too tough.   I'm taking the Jets here in a shootout 38-31

Steelers -4.5 vs Raiders
Raiders have been really good the last few weeks.  If the playoffs started today (thank god they don't) the Raiders would be the 5 seed in the AFC playoffs.  The Steelers backs are against the wall right now on the outside looking in, and they lost their stud.  But De'Angelo Williams was good enough in the first two weeks for them, he should be a good replacement for Leveon Bell, and having Ben Roethlisberger back helps a ton too.  Would not shock me if the Raiders went into Heinz field and won the game, but i'm taking the Steelers here 31-24.

Bucs +2.5 vs Giants
Sorry Tem.  The buccaneers have slowly been getting better.  If you take away the monumental collapse against the redskins, they'd actually have a winning record.  Apparently Jameis hasn't turned it over the last couple of weeks.  Doug Martin is looking like a superstar again.  The Giants are an enigma.  I can't trust them at this point.  They haven't been good on the road, their defense is awful, and they don't have a running game.  By the way, hey saints, you do know that Odell Beckham is on the giants right?  It seems like they forgot he was on the team, so they didn't cover him in the redzone at all last week.  cost my fantasy team a win, stupid fucking saints.  #fantasyreasons  I'll take the Bucs to win outright at home 31-28.

Falcons -7.5 vs 49ers
What a mess.  Blaine Gabbert is your solution?  Falcons haven't looked good the last 4 weeks, but this is a get right game against a team in utter turmoil.  I doubt Tomsula gets fired this year, but he should.  Never should have been their head coach to begin with.  Didn't they just give Kaepernick a big contract?  This is an organization in total disarray.  (spell check tried to change disarray to dispensary, not even close spell check).  I'm taking the team with an actual NFL quarterback playing this weekend.  Rams in a blowout 34-10.

This just in, the royals scored again

Colts +5.5 vs Broncos
Ok, this might be a reverse jinx game.  I see it as a trap game for the Broncos though.  The Colts are reeling and absolutely need a win.  Broncos are riding high.  They have lost their last 5 in Indianapolis.  Two things in the broncos favor in this game though, a) they still remember getting their asses handed to them in the playoffs by the Colts last year and b) that defense should get after Andrew Luck, and he's hurt and hasn't been good against pressure (see buffalo game, week 1).  I think the Broncos win this game, but the colts make a late 4th quarter charge to make it interesting.  Side note: Manning can break Favre's all-time passing yards record, and all-time wins record this week.  If he breaks those records, i'd imagine the fans in Indy giving him a standing ovation.  They should, he's a colt for life. He didn't choose to leave, they kicked his ass to the curb.  Broncos win this game 24-20.

Eagles -2.5 vs Cowboys
Matt Cassel, need I say more?

Chargers -4 vs Bears
Both these teams are better than their records.  Bears won't have Forte, which is a huge deal for them.  Puts all the pressure on Cutler and I don't like that.  If Forte were healthy, i'd take the Bears in this game.  I think the Chargers players have been affected by the talk about moving to LA.  I don't think they want to move to LA, LA sucks.  I think it's been a distraction all year, even if they say it isn't.  Phylis Rivers' wife just had their 9th kid.  seriously.  They now have a large enough family to put together a full offense.  I can't imagine having 9 kids, even if I was a millionaire, it sounds awful, and I love kids.  Anyway, i digress.  Chargers win this game 34-24.

Go Royals

Sunday, November 01, 2015

Quick Picks

Not picking the London game, just missed it. 

ATL -7.5 over Bucs
Buccos banged up and not real good to begin with.

CLE +6 over Az
West coast team coming in on daylight savings weekend, Browns are excellent ATS this year, especially at home.

ST LOO -8 over Niners
That front doe*.  Kappy gonna be on the run.

Giants +3 over SAINTS
Home for Eli, OBJ and Randle.  I think they finally explode.  Also a guy named Orleans will get 10-12 touches.  Kid is explosive.

Minny -1 over BEARS
Norv found him a new weapon in Diggs.

San Diego +3.5 over BALT
Chargers usually are dog shit travelling east but the secondary of Baltimore should be exploited by Rivers who is on a sick pace stat wise.

Cincy +1 over STEELERS
Is ben 100?  I'm hearing rain.

Ten +3.5 over HOU
Texans are dog shit, O'Brien and Smith should be gone.

OAK +3 over Nyj
Raiders are streaking here

Seattle -4.5 over DALLAS
cmon son  How does Dallas win this game?

DENVER +2.5 over Green Bay
Bye week did wonders for Peytons health.

Indy +6.5 over CAR
Indy to cover, Panthers move to 7-0

Wednesday, October 28, 2015

rough loss (and picks for week 8)

Ouch..rough loss by the Mets last night.  The kind of loss that lingers with you for days, weeks, maybe even years.  I mean, you gave up an inside the park HR to start the game, and then fighting back to have a chance to close it out...and then Alex Gordon. Oh well.  cmblue made fun of Bartolo Colon too.  I guess baseball is the only sport (and maybe only pitchers) where nobody cares about physical fitness. Maybe kickers in football too.

NBA started last night, somebody won, somebody lost.  I'll let you know when the season actually starts in February.

Last week wasn't great for the pick train.  EP did ok with an 8-5 record, and I was 7-7, so at least it wasn't a losing week, but not great.  That brings me to 51-35-3 (.573) and EP is catching up 46-34-3 (.554).

Patriots -8 vs Dolphins
I don't think i've picked a thursday night game correctly yet. (editor's note: blue is actually 1-5 in thursday night games) Forget about the spread, I can't even pick who wins the game straight up.  I watched the 1st half of the Pats game on Sunday, then I went to Legoland.  I had more fun at Legoland.  Brady didn't look great, but really lots of drops from his receivers.  The defense isn't very good.  But they still win.  Dolphins have rode the Dan Campbell wave of emotion for 2 weeks.  Ok, so they beat the shitty Texans and the shitty Titans.  Things get real this week, and no amount of inspiration and big speeches and emotions will help.  I don't think the Dolphins can hang, no real reason other than the Patriots are better.  Pats win this one going away 41-17.

Lions +4.5 vs Chiefs
Dude, another game in London. This is the third game, right, are there more? (editor's note: no, there are no more London games this year) I did watch some of the game on Yahoo last week, i wasn't too concerned about it.  Lions fired their OC right before they go to London, and Jim Bob takes over.  I think you'll see some improvement, just from the shake-up.  (see dolphins above).   Wait, how fucked do the Chiefs have to feel, they have one of the best home field advantages, and they have to trade a home game for a game in London..fuck you Goodell, why can't the Lions be the home team?  Anyway, all that leads to a Lions win 31-28.

Falcons -7.5 vs Bucs
That's a lot of points for a team that barely beat Zach Mettenberger.  I think they were embarrassed last week, and respond this week.  Their at home where they play well, and they actually played better but had a bunch of dumb penalties.   Bucs have to be distraught after blowing the big lead against the skins last week.  That's the type of loss that sticks with you.  Kind of like blowing a save on a HR in the ninth in the world series.  Falcons get right this week 31-21.

Cardinals -4.5 vs Browns
This is a line like the Falcons/Titans last week that didn't make any sense to me.  Although the browns have played just about everyone tough, i  think, I don't know, i'm not looking it up.  Apparently McNown is hurt but he's going to play because Johnny Football is awful or something.  At what point do you turn the keys over to Manziel.  I know McNown isn't the problem, but in the end, you should start making up your mind now if you need to draft another QB next year.  Cardinals outside on the road, in the eastern time zone, daylight savings, short week, lots of stuff.  I'll take the cardinals 43-25

Rams -9.5 vs 49ers
This is more about the 9ers being awful on the road, than it is about the Rams being good.  This line is too high, and will probably come down by kickoff because the Rams shouldn't be 9.5 point favorites over anyone, ever.  Rams do have a great running game, and Todd Gurley is the truth.  They have an awesome pass rush.  9ers have had some extra time to prepare, but last we saw them, they looked awful against an average seahawks team.  I've gone back and forth a bunch on this one, just because of the line, but I'll go with the Rams here 24-10.

Giants +3 vs Saints
Not sure why the saints are favored here.  I guess they've been better the past few weeks, but so have the Giants.  G-men are the better team, simply because the saints defense is awful.   i don't have much else to say about this.  Giants win 27-24

Bears (pick'em) vs Vikings
These are the types of games that the Vikings have to win if they want to be serious about the playoffs.  These are the types of games the Bears have to win to show they've improved some.  I like John Fox, and I like what the Bears have done the last few weeks.  Bears should have all their weapons back this week, and I like all their weapons better than the Vikings weapons.  This is the type of game that John Fox finds a way to win.  21-20 bears eek one out

Ravens -3 vs Chargers
Something's gotta give here.  The Chargers are 0-3 on the road, the Ravens are 0-2 at home, both teams are riduculously under achieving.  I give the Ravens the edge because of the east coast early game rule for west coast teams.  Phyllis Rivers has been pretty damn good, but he's throwing it like 70 times a game. (editors note: he's averaging 44 attempts per game this season, and 62 attempts per game the last 2 games)    Flacco on the other hand is throwing it a lot as well, and he doesn't have any wide receivers other than Steve Smith Sr, or jr or whatever.  (editors note: flacco is averaging 41 pass attempts per game). I don't know what any of this means, but i'll take the ravens 24-17

Bengals (pick'em) vs Steelers
Big Ben should be back, but will he be 100%.  He better be against a great defense like the Bengals.  I'd feel more comfortable about taking the steelers if Ben had a few games back under his belt.  Dalton is playing really well, and this doesn't have the feel of a collapse for them.  The Bengals are coming off the bye, should be ready and rested.  If the Bengals can win this game, it will essentially wrap up the division for them with a 4 game lead and all the tie breakers, which really make it a 5 game lead.  I like it.  Bengals win this one big time 31-20.

Titans (off) vs Texans
I guess there's no line because they aren't sure if Mariota is going to play?  Or are they waiting on news about TJ Yates?  I made a deal that I wasn't taking the Texans again this season and i'm sticking with it.  Titans win 10-9

Jets -1 vs Raiders
Jets have to fly cross country after a tough road loss last week.  Rumor has it that the Jets were pissed that they blew that game.  I didn't watch the 2nd half (legoland remember), but i heard that Brandon Marshall false started or something and the clock ran off when they were in position to tie the game.  And he dropped a pass, and now he doesn't like Greg Hardy.  So to recap, Jets maybe could have won, but I was at legoland.  The Raiders on the other hand, they look awesome.  They're young and so I expect them to be up and down a lot.  This will be a down week, just too tough of a defense, and I'd expect Revis to just take away Amari Cooper.  And with no Cooper, there is no bueno for Derek Carr.  Jets win this one pretty easily 28-17.

Seahawks -6 vs Cowboys
Matt Cassel.   Seahawks win 31-10

Packers -3 vs Broncos
This is not a reverse jinx business.  I think the Broncos have won games against a weak schedule and some really bad QBs.  It's one of those fools gold type of 6-0 runs, like they had the first year McDaniels was their head coach.  Not only have they played a bunch of weak QBs, but it's not like the defenses they've had to face have been much better.  The Vikings probably had the best defense they've faced so far this year. The broncos main problem has been lack of finishing off drives and having to settle for FGs.  Can't do that against Aaron Rodgers.  The schedule gets a lot tougher starting this week, and the Packer's defense is no joke.  I don't think the Pack's offense has looked that great, i mean Aaron Rodgers is still awesome, but the Pack has only been over 30 points in 2 games so far this season, so not putting up Pack like numbers.  I'll go with the averages here, I think the broncos keep it close but eventually lose this one to the Packers  27-23.

Colts +7.5 vs Panthers
Colts have been awful this year.  Panthers have been really good.  Colts can't run the ball, can't protect Andrew Luck, can't win games.  Panthers have run the ball, played great defense and have Cam.  I don't know why, but I just have a weird feeling about this game.  Colts backs are up against the wall.  Cam Newton is maybe too immature and the panthers are feeling too good about themselves.  I kind of like the colts in an upset with their season on the line.  Colts win 24-20.

Friday, October 23, 2015


Few things on the baseball stuff first.

The Cubs will be good for a few years so sorry Andy.  The lineup is boss.   

I think the Royals will be the more formidable opponent.  Because of their lineup depth.  And they have been the best team from start to finish.  They seem to grind out every at bat and just keep moving the line.  They single you to death.  Blue Jays are explosive but can be handled with the pitching the Mets have.  I don't care.  This had been so much fun whatever happens next I'm totally  fine with.  Obviously you want them to win it all but either way, I'm satisfied.  I can't stop thinking about how the future is looking too with this staff.  Even with Harvey leaving after his walk year they will have the goods for awhile if handled right.

Notice in baseball the head honcho is a manager but in all other sports he is the head "coach".

Baseball goes on way too long.  Can't they shave off all division games by 4?  What's the math on that if instead of 19 games they play 15 games vs. their division opponents.  162 down to ________.

Football now.

Cam Newton should have been a pitcher. He was throwing rockets last week.  No idea how WR's catch his balls.

How much easier would the Packers make it look with Jordy?  I really need to bet them by the quarter.  They are always up 14-0 after one.

Pete Carroll thinks they just are not getting the breaks they have gotten in the past.  Like can you be more specific?  The offensive line is a mess right now.  What does that have to do with the way the ball bounces?  Fucking eternal optimists.

Non football thoughts

I think it's gross to brush your teeth in the men's bathroom at work.  Or in any communal bathroom for that matter.  I got my dick in my hand bro.  There is fecal matter in the air.  And dick dander.  Now that's on your toothbrush. 

Seriously those Lincoln commercials are not starting to piss me off.  The bearded dude from Fan Duel is a close second.  Fuck that guy.

JAX +4 over Bills
Surprisingly enough scoring is not an issue for the Jags.  It's their leaky defense.  I don't think the Bills have enough healthy weapons to blow anyone out.  Rex keeps on insisting he can fix this, like as if he doesn't see this as a work in progress.  Relax man, no one thought this team would compete for a super bowl so chill out.  One week at a time.  He's got some issues.

SKINS -3 over Bucs
Is there still RGIII/Cousins talk?  How about both suck.  Just turn around and hand it off 50 times a game and play defense.  Man that HC job has to be one of the worst jobs in America.  My weekend in DC was splendid by the way.  Great town.  I could live there.

Falcons -4 over TITANS
Devonta Freeman runs possessed and Julio Jones is Calvin circa 2011.  Titans have no one on their roster that can stop either of them.  And there is no way they can match Atlanta score for score.  This line is silly to me.  I guess because the Saints trashed them on Thursday night.  I'm sure they have made some adjustment and/or just played poorly.  This is a blowout.

INDY -4.5 over Saints
Weirdest part about the fake punt, they were playing well and were still in the game.  Had a chance there to pin them deep (McAfee is solid) and force a three and out.  Who knows?  Just an awful decision by the head coach.  A "W" will make that shit go away. 

Minny -2.5 over DETROIT
Stafford is alive.  Vikes might have found a real WR.  I can't remember but doesn't Peterson usually strafe the Lions?  Who is the defensive coordinator for the Lions No One?  Play some fucking defense for crissakes.

Steelers over KC
No matter who throws for black and gold I don't like the matchups for KC.  One of the major problems with the Steelers the past few years was aging players.  They have pretty much taken care of that.  This Shazier kid is special.  The big lineman they have is great too.  Brown is a beast, Bell is their version of Forte but better I think.  This is the better football team.  KC is really struggling this year.

ST LOO -7 over Browns
Browns have been pesky no doubt.  I just don't like this matchup for McNown.  When he gets pressured he just turns the ball over.  And they have running game to lean on.

MIAMI -4 over Texans
4?  Remember in Scarface when Tony was hired to kill that politician in the beginning of the movie in that camp under a I-95 overpass in Miami?  Miami is Tony and that politician is the Texans.  Houston is going to get murdered.  And no the Dolphins aren't world beaters all of a sudden but they clearly underachieved during Philbin's time, I kept saying it, and they are light years better than the Texans.  4 points is an insult.  If I'm Campbell I would be saying behind closed doors that we should be favored by 20.

Jets +10 over PATS
Can't say the Jets always play the Pats tight but it sure seems that way.  At least during Rex's first few years they did.  Beat them a few times too.  Once in the playoffs.  This is always a huge game for both teams I think they both consider this their strongest rivalry in the division.  Bowles hasn't really been Belichik'd yet so we'll see.  I think they keep it close because they can pressure Brady with their front.  And Revis knows them intimately.

Oak +4 over SD
So is this a home team for both teams?  Are they in LA yet?  They should play this game in the Rose Bowl.  Would be cool.  Carr to Cooper is a years to come connection.  The Chargers are an unbalanced offense right now.  If I'm Del Rio I'm blitzing the shit out of Rivers.

Dallas +3.5 over GIANTS
I don't know what the Giants were last Monday.  That was putrid.  Dallas's pass rush is coming on and I'm afraid they will just have their way.  Giants are not healthy right now.  And Dallas might get Dez back.  Would really help Cassel.

CAROLINA -3 over Philly
Panthers comeback last week was very impressive.  Even if we all think Seattle lost their fastball.  Could they be 6-0 after only winning 7 games last year?  I think so.  Top 3 story in the NFL.  Rivera if officially off the hot seat.

Ravens +10 over ARIZONA
The Ravens are well on their way to a double digit losing season but I think they have some pride in them and make enough plays to hang around.  10 is a big number in the NFL.

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Week 7 Pickers

Oh my what a weekend.  A couple of overtime games, a goal-line defensive stop to win the game (Packers), a last second TD to win on the road against the 12th man (Panthers), and the best/worst fake punt in history (Colts).

5 Teams come into week 7 undefeated, which is the most in like 70 years or something.  Packers, Bengals, and Broncos are on a bye so the Dolphins won't be popping any corks this weekend, but week 8, I guarantee at least one of those 3 teams will lose.  You read it here first.  I'm not sure which team, but one of those three are guaranteed to lose in week 8.

That fake punt, unbelievable that you'd think you're going to trick the pats.  apparently they're supposed to look like they're running off the field to get the offense on, but then why is a WR playing center?  Stupid, dumb play.

unbelievable 4th quarter from Cam Newton, just owned the seahawks.  This is a team that won 7 games last year.  They lost all of their weapons and now they've already won 5.

unbelievable that the colts hung with the pats.  Game wasn't really that close, but I expected a much bigger blowout.  I guess it gives the rest of the NFL hope that the pats maybe aren't invincible. (TBD)

On to the picks.  I went 7-6-1 last week, and EP was 7-5-1.  Total for the year is a respectable 44-28-3 for me, and 38-29-3 for EP.  Also, it's too late now, but you should have bought McDonald's stock about a month ago. Everyone loves all day breakfast. (Beast)  And if you're looking for a buy low option, Chipotle is dropping and will come back, same with Tesla.

49ers +6.5 vs Seahawks
I'm not a fan of this game, all thursday night games suck.  Seahawks got embarrased at the end last week, and the wheels are starting to come off the defense.  This is what happens when you have a lot of loud overconfident guys, when it starts going bad, they're not afraid to turn on each other.  The 49ers are a mess, but they've been ok at home.  I like them to keep it close enough.  The seahawks don't score enough points really to blow this one open.  Seahawks win, 21-17.

Jaguars +7 vs Bills
I guess this is a home game for the Jags.  At least they're used to playing in London, so they've got that going for them.  I can't figure out the Bills, they're hot one week, then cold the next.  2 of their 3 losses are against teams that are undefeated, so the schedule hasn't been kind.  I like what i've seen out of Jacksonville's offense lately.  They can toss it around, and having Julius Thomas helps Bortles out a ton.  I think the bills win, but don't cover.  Although, i wouldn't be shocked if the Jags won this game.  Bills win 28-24.

Redskins -3 vs Bucs
The skins are another of those conundrum teams.  Sometimes they surprise you and are super tough, other times they just get their doors blown off.  The bucs aren't that bad, but their two wins have come against an awful Saints team, and a really bad Jags team.  The skins are better than both of those teams.  I think the skins run the ball, control the clock, and win the game 17-13.

Falcons -4 vs Titans
Titans might be without Mariota.  Not sure yet.  I'd sit him if i'm the whisenhunter, because why risk more injury to your future.  The Titans have played teams tough, but haven't been able to hold on and win games late.  They very well could be maybe a little better than their record suggests.  The falcons are coming of a Thursday night embarrassment.  Dan Quinn is going to get in their faces this week.  They'll blitz the heck out of Mariota or Mettenberg, and should win this one by 10 points or so.  If not, the falcons are not for real.  Falcons 24-14.

Colts -4.5 vs Saints
So that fake punt.  I guess that's the play you call when you're the coach and you hate your owner and GM.  I know it wasn't supposed to be snapped.  I know it wasn't supposed to whatever...but c'mon.  You can't trick the tricksters.  You'd have been better off, running a real fake punt.  Especially after the onside kick fail, you know the Pats were on high alert then.  If you can't line up and just beat them, then they're already in your head, and they've won.  All that being said, the Colts finally started to look like a decent team.  The Saints are not.  Colts at home against a horrible defense 38-21.

Vikings -2.5 vs Lions
I think the Lions are a better team.  I think they have the better offense, the better QB, the better defense.  But in the end the Vikings seem to be better than the Lions in all the ways I just mentioned. Peterson has figured out this Norv Turner system.  Bridgewater has shown flashes, but he's struggling.  In the end, this Lions team is down, and their confidence is shot.  I like the vikings here, 24-21

Chiefs (off) vs Steelers
This is a pick'em because nobody knows who is going to play QB for the Steelers this week.  So i'm picking this both ways.  In this choice, i'm assuming Landry Jones is going to play, and i'll take the Chiefs in that case.  I think Landry at arrowhead, would be a huge mess.  In that case, Chiefs 21-17, if Roethlisberger plays, i'll take the Steelers on the road because they're the better team.  Steelers 24-21.

Browns +5.5 vs Rams
Browns offense isn't that bad,except that they can't run the ball. Having McCown try and throw for 400 yards every week probably isn't the best way to try and beat a rams team that has great pass rushers.  That being said, the rams are not that good either.  Nick Foles?  c'mon.  So while the Rams may win the game, they shouldn't be 5.5 point favorites.  I'll take the Rams to win at home but no cover 20-17.

Dolphins -4 vs Texans
I'm not taking the texans in another game this year (which didn't work for me last week).  Dolphins will ride this new coach bump for another week, then they'll be back to their old ways.  Dolphins 28-17.

Jets +10 vs Pats
It's just too many points.  I think the pats are the better team.  I think they'll do their patriot things.  The Jets are really good on defense, but they rely on the blitz a lot, and you can't really do that to Tommy.  We'll see what Todd Bowles has up his sleeve for Brady.  If this number was closer to 6 i'd probably take the Pats, but I can't drop 10 on this game because the Pats defense is just not that good.  Patriots win 31-24.

Raiders +4 vs Chargers
One of these teams will be in LA next year.  Maybe both, but not neither.  I just think the Raiders are the better team right now.  To be fair, i haven't watched one minute of the Chargers this season.  But i've watched the Raiders a couple of times.  Derek Carr is the real deal, they can run the ball fairly well.  Amari Cooper is a stud.  Rivers still has some of that gunslinger in him, and can go out and throw for 500 yards on any given weekend.  I'll take the Raiders to win outright 28-24

Giants -3 vs Cowboys
If the answer to the question is ever Matt Cassell, then it doesn't matter what the question is, your team is awful.  Cowboys are lucky that they're in a weak division, and maybe could still be in it when Romo comes back...maybe.  Giants are probably good enough to win this game by 3.  If I could guess a push, this would be the game (they need a .5 here to swing the betting).  Giants win 28-24

Panthers -3 vs Eagles
Eagles are starting to figure it out a little bit.  But honestly, the only "impressive" win they have was against the Jets.  Bradford is horrible.  If the Eagles can run the ball, they can stay in this game...but that's a huge if, i know.  Panthers just seem to get it done.  This could be a let down week for them.  Coming off a huge win, emotional, on the road....they could stumble, but i'm not counting against Cam here. Panther's defense is pretty good against the run. Panthers frustrate the Eagles, 24-17.

Cardinals -9 vs Ravens
That seems like a lot of points.  But the Cards got embarrassed last week.  They get to come home and right the ship.  They've been scoring a ton of points (up until last week), so I think they get back on the scoring wagon.  Their 4 wins, they've scored over 30 points, their two losses, they've been held under 23 points.  The Ravens have scored over 30, one time, against the Raiders in a loss.   All this adds up to a cardinals win, 35-24.

Friday, October 16, 2015


Oh my god. OH MY GOD!
If he homers off of Arrieta he will homer off of the three Cy Young candidates this year 

I'll never get the whole shift thing.  Why a pro hitter can't slap one the other way, in a crucial at bat, is mind bottling*.  Even when you get pitched inside it can be done.

Greinke was 19-0 in LA when given the lead.

Kershaw and Greinke 4 out of 5 games man.  And they got beat.  That's called beating the best.  It won't be tougher vs. Chicago.  The Cubs have a potent lineup, different challenge.  Rabid RABID crowd.  Will be a great series for America.  America wins.  MLB wins.  This is a lot of fun.

David Wright better get his shit together.

Keith Hernandez was giddy on the post-game show.  Wish those guys got to call these games (at least Darling does).  That must suck.  You are with the team all year long, calling all the games, sitting through the stinkers, the extra innings and then post-season comes and the corporations have their own guys.

Sorry Chicago, I know you haven't won shit in 100+ years but not on the Mets watch.   Thanks for shoving the Cardinals down a flight of stairs.

Obviously wasn't watching the Falcons game and didn't watch any highlights.  How did the Saints trash them?  Turnovers?  Those Thurs. night games are kooky.

Let's get to the picks I don't have all day. 

Blue tells me my record is good. I believe him.

JETS -7 over Skins
The defense should harass Cousins into turnovers.  Because I don't see them getting a change to establish the run on a rested defense who get back all-pro tackle Sheldon Richardson.  He who of fame from driving 120 mph with a kid in the car high as a kite.  But whatever you can do what you want when you can toss lineman around in football.

Az -3.5 over STEELERS
Just let Bell run the Wildcat half the game.  And Arians returns to the scene of the crime.

MIN -4 over Kc
KC was having a tough time winning games with Charles.  Now they have to try without him?  Andy Reid's play calling repertoire will be expanded this week.  Which is not a good thing for the Chiefs and Alex Smith.  Reid : "Let's throw a reverse bootleg with three down lineman as eligible receivers then reverse back and throw a screen to D'Anthony Thomas and have him lateral to Chandandrick West on three, ON THREE!"  Smith:  '**blank stare**

Bengals -3.5 over BUFFALO
I don't like the smell of EJ Manuel coming into this game when T-Mobile limps off halfway through the second quarter.  The Bills are awesome at home but only at full health.  Every important player is hurt.  The whole damn offense is questionable.  No thanks.  This would be ok if the Browns were in town not the Bengals and the red rifle.

DETROIT -3 over Bears
I like how Meiz projects on us that he is some sort of Lions insider.  You got a night job at the DFREEP?  Lions get off the schneid here.  This is their first break on the schedule.  If they go 0-16 I'll change my name to Andy and move to Wisconsin.

Broncos -4 over BROWNS
I thought the Raiders were winning that game.  Defense keeps bailing out Peyton and the offense.  What's going to happen when the weather starts to turn?  They need to get that running game going.  The Browns have been playing pretty well but not sure they have seen a defense this good since the Week 1 game vs. the Jets.  Even if Ware sits I like the Broncos.  Defense travels well.

JAX -1 over Texans
If Red Zone shows me one second of this game I'm going to be pissed.

Miami +2 over TITANS
Interim coaches, especially intimidating intense ones, always win the first game they coach.  Always.  Look it up.  Interim coaches are like 87-0 when coaching the first game.  The Dolphins will be flying all over the place and the oc will commit to the run early with Miller to set up the Tannyhill's.

Carolina +8 over SEAHAWKS
Pretty high line for a team with a lot of problems.  Leaky offensive line.  Cary Williams is getting abused opposite Sherman.  Jimmy Graham is an innocent bystander on offense.  Carolina has been a bit of a surprise although I'm not sure they really played a GOOD team yet.  So this is a nice test here on the road.  Off a bye, Cam got a chance to rest his body, I'll take him and 8 points to bank.

San Diego +11.5 over GREEN BAY
Good grief this is a high line.  I know I said last week I'll lay the points every week with the Packers but 11.5 to a pretty good team is a little much for me to risk. 

SF +1 over Ravens
This was a tough decision because both teams suck right now.  Question is who will suck worse on Sunday?  If  Flacco had any playmakers on offense I would take them but the pantry is bare.

PATS -10.5 over Colts
Well that line changed huh.  Was 8 yesterday.  Whatever like Blue said, which is an LP line, this line couldn't be high enough.  Remember this is Brady IDGAF campaign #2.  The last one was pretty damn impressive. 

Giants +4 over EAGLES
Could we talk about Eli's throw last week for a minute.  Not the boneheaded pick in the end zone wiseass.  The game winner.  That was a playoff throw.  His clutch throws never surprise me.  The dime to Manningham is probably the best throw I've ever seen and will ever see.  The Rothlisberger/Santonio Super Bowl throw is a close second.  Anyway who are the Eagles to give points?  Whether OBJ plays or not I think the Giants are in this one.

Wednesday, October 14, 2015

bam diggity (and week 6 picks)

So Lamar Odom likes brothels...join the club buddy.

Hillary looks like she might ruin EP's life for the next year or so.  His head my literally explode.

Baseball playoffs have been fun.  I've really enjoyed the cubs and the astros.

Picks have been good the last two weeks, i was 8-4-2 last week, EP was 7-4-2, bringing the total for me to 37-22-2 (i'm so money and i don't even know it), and EP up to 31-24-2.  Fucking ties. Stupid pushes, who sets a line without a half point anyway.  Vegas sucks, so does Reno, and laughlin.

Here are my unbelievables:
unbelievable that Todd Gurley is the second coming of AD.  If the Rams had a QB they'd be good.

unbelievable that I keep picking the texans and they keep letting me down.

unbelievable that Cutler has led two straight last minute drives to win games (where are his gut wrenching interceptions???)

unbelievable that the Lions are the only winless team...wouldn't have been in my first 20 picks of teams to be winless after 5 games.

On to the picks
Falcons -3.5 over Saints
Falcons just keep finding a way to win.  Every game is tight, they've been behind in the 4th quarter of every game, and yet they're still undefeated.  Team of destiny?  probably not, eventually that evens itself out.  But it was encouraging to see the Falcons win when Matty Ice had a bad game.  Saints are garbage, their defense stinks, something is wrong with Brees, and they won't be able to keep it close.  Falcons 38-21

Broncos -4 over Browns
Browns offense hasn't been that bad really.  McCown put up some crazy numbers last week.  Well they have to play against a little better defense this week.  Broncos offense has been awful.  I can't describe how bad it's been, but kind of like the Falcons, the defense finds a way to make big plays and win in the end.  Broncos luck will run out soon enough, but not against the hapless Browns.  I don't like going east and playing an early game for the Broncos, and i'm probably jinxing them here, but I can't justify taking the browns.  Broncos 17-10.

Redskins +7 over Jets
I just think that's too many points for the Jets.  Jets are the better team, they'll harass Kirk Cousins into making mistakes for sure.  I think the skins run the ball and play clock management game and keep it low scoring and close.  Jets win in a skunk fest, 10-9.

Steelers +3 over Cardinals
Bruce Arians will have something special for the Steelers i'm sure.  But early game again, traveling east.  Steelers might have Ben back, doubtful, but maybe.  I still think the cardinals are not that good on the road i'm taking the steelers here, 21-20 on a leveon bell fake field goal

Vikings -4 over Chiefs
Chiefs season ended when Jamaal Charles went down.  Just pack it up and go home.  Try and get the first overall pick and draft a QB, or even get a top 3 pick, there should be enough good QBs.  I think you'll see a steady diet of AD this week for the Vikings.  They are sneaky good on defense and should be able to handle the chiefs no problem.  Vikings 24-10

Bengals -3.5 over Bills
I thought about this one a long time.  But in the end Cincy is the better team.  I wouldn't be surprised to see Buffalo win this game, they are awesome at home, but i'm riding this year's early season team of destiny (that's not named the patriots).  Bengals are the scariest team in the AFC, even though I think the Bills get to Dalton a few times, much like the seahawks did.  Bills won't have shady, they won't have Karlos, they may not have Tyrod, they probably won't have Sammy, who the heck do they have...because Percy Harvin can't be the answer.  Bengals 21-7

Lions -2.5 over Bears
Another tough one.  I think the Lions get it done this week though.  Finally a winable game for them, and while Cutler has been good enough the last few weeks, eventually he'll come back down to earth.  Bears defense just isn't good enough to keep the lions to 17 points that they'd need to win.  Lions win the game 24-18

Jaguars (pick'em) over Texans
I'm not picking the Texans the rest of the year.  Jags 28-24

Dolphins +1 over Titans
A winnable game for the Titans, but I think with a new coach the fins come out pissed and play their asses off.  It's embarrassing to get your coach fired 4 games into a season.  They have too much pride and talent.  They'll get a boost for a few weeks, but it will be fools gold.  Dolphins 28-21

Panthers +7 over Seahawks
The line just seems a little big.  Seahawks probably win the game.  Carolina just doesn't have enough on offense but a very stout defense.  Seahawks haven't blown anyone out other than the Jimmy Clausen led Bears so I think it'll be closer than the 7 points.  Beast Mode is back but so is CAM.  I'll go with the seahawks to win and not cover 21-20.

Packers -11.5 over Chargers
Not sold on this Chargers team, and think the packers bounce back at home this week.  A-Rodg can't be happy about the way he played.  They'll get Eddie Lacy involved and cram it down the chargers throat.  nothing about the chargers makes me think they can keep it close, and i usually don't give the double digit points in the NFL, but here's the exception.  Packers 35-21.

49ers +1 over Ravens
Both of these are teams I keep taking when I shouldn't and they keep letting me down.  I like the 49ers here, just because they are home dogs.  No steve smith for the ravens, no bueno.  49ers win to quiet the critics for a week, 24-20.

Patriots -8 over Colts
I don't think you could make this line big enough.  This is the epitome of the revenge tour.  It could be 20 and i'd lay the points.  Colts have been awful this year, and yet keep winning games somehow, pulling them out of their asses.  I think LG Blunt* has a big game again this year, and Brady has this game over by halftime.  I'm taking the Pats in a rout, 42-17.

Giants +4.5 over Eagles
This line boggles me.  Eagles are favorites because they looked good against the saints?  To heck with that.  Giants have been solid all year, probably should be 4-1 other than Eli and Coughlin losing their minds that first week against Dallas.  Eagles don't have anything worth a damn.  Chip Kelly could be coaching in Texas or South Carolina or Southern Cal next year.  He's probably already cleaning up his resume to circulate  Giants win 24-20.

Friday, October 09, 2015


I mean October baseball yes?


I love how Harvey has 65 starts under his belt and is already being treated like a 10 year veteran.  That guy has tremendous balls.

9:45 is late.  I'm old now.  Not sure I'll be able to keep the peepers open.  I might have to try cocaine.
Maybe a late night espresso w/zambuca

Blue seems to be doing well on his NFL picks.  Congrats Blue.  There is a spot for you at Stocks and Sports, LLC.  I'll even hire you a pretty chick with big hooters we can all sexually harass.

Matt Barnes seems like a reasonable person.

This Patrick Kane story is nutty. 

Stephen A Smith is still an asshole.  Man he is the worst.

Bears +10.5 over CHIEFS
It's both hilarious and gratuitous that this line is so high.  The combination of Forte/Jeffrey/Bennett keeps the Cutlers alive and well until a backbreaking turnover.  Bears cover, Chiefs win.

CINCY -3 over Hawks
Seattle is still out of sorts.  No Lynch potentially.  Deep funk.  Maybe it's because Russy is hitting skins now.  Remember everyone gets shittier when you start hitting steady pussy.  The Bengals at home, early start with Seattle coming off a short week in which they were handed a win by the refs = Yes please.  Also remember, Dalton won't start sucking until the back nine.

Redskins +8 over FALCONS
I think two things.  You can totally tell Quinn has his made an immediate impact on this team.  They are playing so well on defense, his calling card with Seattle.  Really well with not so much talent.  A testament to his coaching skill on that side of the ball.  Which makes their decision to wait for him post Super Bowl was smart.  Two : They have taken advantage of the shitty start by the NFC East teams and beat up on a future 4-12 team.  Playing their fourth NFC East team, Washington, I think the Skins will keep it close.  At least 8 points worth. 

TB -2.5 over JAX
Hamster time.

PHILLY -5 over Saints
Chip Kelly is a disaster.  Every week it's something else.  He is getting roasted.  But this feels like a game where DeMarco Murray finally gets his touches and blows by New Orleans on his own. 

Browns +7 over RAVENS
Who is playing WR for Baltimore? 

GB - 10 over St. Louis
Green Bay is going to end up going like 10-4-2 ATS this year, something like that.  So I'm just going to ride that.  For now.

Buffalo -1 over TITANS
Remember when Pettine blitzed the shit out of Mariota?  Yeah that.

Arizona -2.5 over DET
My god Detroit has a schedule from hell.  Man AZ is gonna wipe the floor with Detroit.  Boo City.

NE -10 over DALLAS
Man 10 point dogs in their own building.  That has to be a Jerry's World record. So much for Brandon Weeden being the most gifted passer alive.  Off a bye week New England is like 7898780-2 against the spread.  I wonder if Brady is pissed everyone is fawning over his supermodel wife?  Good grief.

OAK +4.5 over Broncos
Raiders win outright.  WRITE IT DOWN.  Carr is going to be flinging that thing all over the O.CO with quickness to negate the pass rush.  You think they scrubbed that Jack Del Rio DNA off that team yet?  No way.  Del Rio goes deep son.  DEEP.

San Fran +7 over GIANTS
Kaperdick missed daddy Harbaugh big time.  I think the Giants shouldn't give anyone points.  When the Giants are expected to do great things they fall flat.  They need to be written off and discarded to win.  Spags is doing wonders by the way with that defense.  Especially when you consider they have no pass rush.  Jason Pierre Claw is the best fantasy name I've ever seen.  Also shame on the NFL for depriving the Giants of a west coast team, 1pm victim.  As Stephanie Tanner would say, How Rude!

SD -3 over Pittsburgh
Poor Steelers.  I don't think they will win a game until Big Ben comes back.  What a difference man. By the time he does they might be out of the playoff picture.  Backups are hard to come by too.  I mean half the league is starting a backup.  Where have all the QB's gone?  College is not producing.  Time to start a developmental league in America.  NFL needs a farm system.  This college kids that put up large numbers are all products of quirky systems. 

Top Of The Page Material:

"Idiots with nothing better to do"

"Most Boston sports fans are just douchebags. Because most people from New England are douchebags." - tem

"Obama got elected because of the Rooney rule" - Jug

"you should never let debt stop you from pro-creating anyway" - El Padrino

"If you agree with EP, change your opinion." - H

"i'm dumb and sensitive. basically i'm a woman" - L Padrino

"I'm so horny this morning. If there wasn't this sex offender list going around id grope bitches on the train this morning" - L Padrino